Elisabeth sat in the common room, staring att he fire but not really
seeing it. Signey came over and sat next to her.
She looked at Elisabeth for a minute and turned and looked at the fire. "I don't know if I'm going to play Quidditch this year." Elisabeth said.
"Why not?"
"I don't know. It just doesn't seem right."
"You think Apacia would want you to quit playing Quidditch because she's not here?"
"No, it's not that. It's something else."
"You think Apacia's dad will be mad if you keep playing."
"No----" But even as she said it she knew it was true.
"Oh Elisabeth. You can't quit. Not now."
Elisabeth stared into the flames. There was so much to try to understand, so much to try and process. She couldn't take it.
"I hate my life." She said suddenly.
"What do you want me to do about it?" Signey asked.
Elisabeth took a moment. She had been expecting something else. "I don't know."
"When your life is bad enough that you know what you hate about it you can come to me. Okay?"
Elisabeth found herself smiling. "Okay."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Okay team! We need a new Chaser. Anyone know where we can find a Chaser?"
"Not particularily."
"Ahem." Arthur said. "Cough cough! Hello!"
"Hello Arthur! What do you want?"
Arthur sighed. "You people wouldn't know a hint if it dropped onto your head. What about me?"
"What about you?"
"Oh my god! Are you people serious? I CAN BE A CHASER!"
"Okay Art, no reason to get into a huff."
Elisabeth could actually see Arthur's blood pressure rising.
"Now I don't know about you guys but I want to win the cup this year- "
"We won the Cup last year you retard. Don't sound so long-suffering."
"Well I want to win this year too."
"Okay. Derrick. I'm the Captain, I'm the only one who gets to nag the team because they suck so you shut up." Christina said.
Elisabeth marveled at how they went on so easily, their lives falling back into place in spite of tradgedy. They continued to laugh, to joke, to live even when other people could not.
She glanced up into the stands and rolled her eyes, seeing Liam sitting there, book in hand, watching her out of the corner of his eye. She had refused to let him into her dorm and he had refused the Ministry order to force her to let him in. Elisabeth had the feeling he was as uncomfortable with the whole thing as she was. Now he sat bored in all her classes, listening to professors drone on about things he had learned already. Elisabeth wasn't entirely sure where he slept or even if he slept. Every time she went down to the common room he was awake, perched eerily on a chair.
"My suggestion is that we actually practise this year."
"Christina! We practised five days a week last year! You're a fanatic!"
'Maybe so. But Gryffindor has a really strong front this year-" she trailed off and sighed. "I think I need to go back to bed."
Everyone nodded. "Good idea. Let's get to bed, busy day tomorrow." Filler words, Elisabeth thought. Maybe everyone else wasn't getting on as well as she had thought. It scared her to think that the others were not getting on well, that she wasn't the only one who felt as though she was standing in a deep, unending pit.
"Tired?" Chase asked, coming up behind her as they walked back to the school.
"No."
"You've had three hours of sleep in a week."
"I'm not tired."
"Doesn't matter. You need sleep. And you need to eat, you look wasted."
Elisabeth shrugged. "I haven't been hungry."
"I'm going to talk to Liam. You need to eat."
"Chase. Please." She used her last weapon. "You haven't been sleeping either."
"I only need thirty minutes of sleep a day. I get that in Arithmancy." He grinned, then his face sobered up. "I'm seriously worried about you Elisabeth-"
"Well you don't need to be." She said sharply, turning away.
"Apparently I do, because you obviously aren't."
"I'm not worried about myself because there's nothing to worry about. I'm fine."
He raised his hands in surrender. "Fine. You win Elisabeth, starve yourself to death if that's what you fancy. If you can make it another week without collapsing from exhaustion. I'm sick of it."
Elisabeth sighed. "Chase, wait."
He turned and faced her but continured to walk. "Why? How can I care about you if you don't even care about yourself? Pretty poor deal if you ask me." He turned around and continued his walk towards the castle.
Liam turned up behind her. "Back to the castle." He said cheerily.
"Oh would you just get lost? God you're so annoying! I don't need you two steps behind me at all times."
Liam raised his eyebrows. "Contrary to popular belief, I don' really want to be here meself."
"Then leave."
"And be slaughtered by yer da and my cousin among others?"
"You can be spared your cousins wrath, at least." Elisabeth said bitterly, looking in the direction Chase had disappeared in.
Liam shook his head and chuckled. "Och, 'ave the wee ones had themselves a row?"
"Shut up." Elisabeth mumbled.
Liam laughed harder. "Shut up! God, you are so annoying."
"Aw, I'm jus' razzing you."
Elisabeth rubbed her temples. "You just poke and poke and poke don't you?"
"I wasn't blessed with sisters so I get to take nineteen years worth of pent up annoyance out on you."
"Why couldn't they have given me an old guy?" Elisabeth moaned.
"Trust me, you don't want an old guy. They're quite greasy, very out of touch. You're far better off with me."
Elisabeth had to force her smile into a grimace.
"Ah! See, see. I'm not that bad am I?"
Elisabeth just shook her head. "I don't know." She said. "You could be better looking."
She looked at Elisabeth for a minute and turned and looked at the fire. "I don't know if I'm going to play Quidditch this year." Elisabeth said.
"Why not?"
"I don't know. It just doesn't seem right."
"You think Apacia would want you to quit playing Quidditch because she's not here?"
"No, it's not that. It's something else."
"You think Apacia's dad will be mad if you keep playing."
"No----" But even as she said it she knew it was true.
"Oh Elisabeth. You can't quit. Not now."
Elisabeth stared into the flames. There was so much to try to understand, so much to try and process. She couldn't take it.
"I hate my life." She said suddenly.
"What do you want me to do about it?" Signey asked.
Elisabeth took a moment. She had been expecting something else. "I don't know."
"When your life is bad enough that you know what you hate about it you can come to me. Okay?"
Elisabeth found herself smiling. "Okay."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Okay team! We need a new Chaser. Anyone know where we can find a Chaser?"
"Not particularily."
"Ahem." Arthur said. "Cough cough! Hello!"
"Hello Arthur! What do you want?"
Arthur sighed. "You people wouldn't know a hint if it dropped onto your head. What about me?"
"What about you?"
"Oh my god! Are you people serious? I CAN BE A CHASER!"
"Okay Art, no reason to get into a huff."
Elisabeth could actually see Arthur's blood pressure rising.
"Now I don't know about you guys but I want to win the cup this year- "
"We won the Cup last year you retard. Don't sound so long-suffering."
"Well I want to win this year too."
"Okay. Derrick. I'm the Captain, I'm the only one who gets to nag the team because they suck so you shut up." Christina said.
Elisabeth marveled at how they went on so easily, their lives falling back into place in spite of tradgedy. They continued to laugh, to joke, to live even when other people could not.
She glanced up into the stands and rolled her eyes, seeing Liam sitting there, book in hand, watching her out of the corner of his eye. She had refused to let him into her dorm and he had refused the Ministry order to force her to let him in. Elisabeth had the feeling he was as uncomfortable with the whole thing as she was. Now he sat bored in all her classes, listening to professors drone on about things he had learned already. Elisabeth wasn't entirely sure where he slept or even if he slept. Every time she went down to the common room he was awake, perched eerily on a chair.
"My suggestion is that we actually practise this year."
"Christina! We practised five days a week last year! You're a fanatic!"
'Maybe so. But Gryffindor has a really strong front this year-" she trailed off and sighed. "I think I need to go back to bed."
Everyone nodded. "Good idea. Let's get to bed, busy day tomorrow." Filler words, Elisabeth thought. Maybe everyone else wasn't getting on as well as she had thought. It scared her to think that the others were not getting on well, that she wasn't the only one who felt as though she was standing in a deep, unending pit.
"Tired?" Chase asked, coming up behind her as they walked back to the school.
"No."
"You've had three hours of sleep in a week."
"I'm not tired."
"Doesn't matter. You need sleep. And you need to eat, you look wasted."
Elisabeth shrugged. "I haven't been hungry."
"I'm going to talk to Liam. You need to eat."
"Chase. Please." She used her last weapon. "You haven't been sleeping either."
"I only need thirty minutes of sleep a day. I get that in Arithmancy." He grinned, then his face sobered up. "I'm seriously worried about you Elisabeth-"
"Well you don't need to be." She said sharply, turning away.
"Apparently I do, because you obviously aren't."
"I'm not worried about myself because there's nothing to worry about. I'm fine."
He raised his hands in surrender. "Fine. You win Elisabeth, starve yourself to death if that's what you fancy. If you can make it another week without collapsing from exhaustion. I'm sick of it."
Elisabeth sighed. "Chase, wait."
He turned and faced her but continured to walk. "Why? How can I care about you if you don't even care about yourself? Pretty poor deal if you ask me." He turned around and continued his walk towards the castle.
Liam turned up behind her. "Back to the castle." He said cheerily.
"Oh would you just get lost? God you're so annoying! I don't need you two steps behind me at all times."
Liam raised his eyebrows. "Contrary to popular belief, I don' really want to be here meself."
"Then leave."
"And be slaughtered by yer da and my cousin among others?"
"You can be spared your cousins wrath, at least." Elisabeth said bitterly, looking in the direction Chase had disappeared in.
Liam shook his head and chuckled. "Och, 'ave the wee ones had themselves a row?"
"Shut up." Elisabeth mumbled.
Liam laughed harder. "Shut up! God, you are so annoying."
"Aw, I'm jus' razzing you."
Elisabeth rubbed her temples. "You just poke and poke and poke don't you?"
"I wasn't blessed with sisters so I get to take nineteen years worth of pent up annoyance out on you."
"Why couldn't they have given me an old guy?" Elisabeth moaned.
"Trust me, you don't want an old guy. They're quite greasy, very out of touch. You're far better off with me."
Elisabeth had to force her smile into a grimace.
"Ah! See, see. I'm not that bad am I?"
Elisabeth just shook her head. "I don't know." She said. "You could be better looking."