*Breathes deep in relief* At last, something had popped out in my awfully tiny and deformed coconut shell to give you another *ahem* wacky chapter of this fic... I don't know how can I continue this thingy, but for you guys, I'll reeeeally try to finish this one (only if I can… ^_^), only that I can't keep track on the funny thingies here…*sobs* AND MY LITTLE COUSINS HERE ARE DROWNING ME WITH THOSE TELETUBBIES INSANITY!!!!!! (so don't wonder why I had some scenes with this implied on it…)
Anyways enjoy this chapter, and since my awfully tiny and deformed coconut shell can't give some ideas anymore, please give me a suggestion on what'll happen on the next chapter, just please!!!! And forgive me if I use words in a wrong way, my brain stores a few words in my vocabulary…^_______^
DISCLAIMER: Again, I DON'T OWN CAPCOM AND I DIDN'T MAKE MMX (or RMX) OR ITS CHARACTERS!!!!!! (do I have to tell you more about that?)
CHAPTER 3 - LANGUAGE CATASTROPHE [still, this fic is rated PG 'coz there are no foul language thingies here...]
(OK, this time I'll have X in part 1. Enjoy!)
--- PART 1A – TRANSLATING INTO ENGLISH AIN'T EASY
[so, from the previous chapter, X has err, forgotten about his name.... He has been stuck there for a long time, and no one has rescued him, so it only means... that what he knows is his name is Coocoo.]
[time elapsed of X's stay in the mental hospital: 2 months]
[at X's room...a thug goes in.]
thug: Hey, how are you there, Coocoo?
X: [he's dressed like some kind of a teletubbie...Tinkie Winkie, Dipsy, Laa Laa or Po, just teletubbies style] I'm fine, thank you!
thug: it's been a long time since you had no visitor, Coocs. Why don't you go out for a while?
X: [and some weird teletubbies style again] Oh…kay.
[And so X and that thug went out…]
[OK, out of X first. In the reception area of that hospital, an unknown man dressing some kind of a dark cloak went through. Of course a personnel there had known that a suspicious guy was passing through.]
personnel: Wh-who are you?
???? (not the author {me, of course}, silly! That's why I added another question mark here): Hm?
personnel: I-identify yourself, or…
????: [innocent] Hmmmm…?
personnel: …or I'll call the police!
????: Hmmmmmm…?
personnel: T-t-tell me, who are you?
????: (manly voice) Nandayou, kusama ga? (What is it, you? {the stronger version of "you", stronger than "omae"}) [a/n: OK, if I got wrong here, just tell me and I'll edit these thingies… TY ^_^]
personnel: Wh-wh-what?
????: Kusama… (you…)
[??? appears]
???: Waaaait!!!!! I got really messed up in here, can I just put this (~) before and after a sentence when he speaks Nihongo? I'm awfully confused here!!!! Anyway, I'll keep the four question marks (????) for the mysterious man, and the three (???) is for me… OK, ja!! n_n [leaves]
????: [to the personnel] ~what do you want to say, dammit!~
personnel: D-do you need to go w-with the f-folks inside? D-d-do you need something?
????: ~I can't understand you, darn…~
[a flash of light appears at ????'s right arm and shoots the light at the personnel. Now, can you guess what'll happen here?]
[after a moment, at X's place, specifically at the playground…]
X: [childish] Coocoo needs a pee.
nurse (to be exact, a GUY nurse): [seductive and soft] You want me to go with you? I can… [to himself] …and I'll be happy *giggle* [to X again] …to take you and go with you there…
X: [happy, really happy *If you hentais out there would think different about that… well, don't expect it. I'm still keeping it PG-13. ^_^*] Really? You'll go with me?
nurse: Sure! *giggle* n.n
[???? suddenly appears from inside the mental hospital building]
????: [as I said a "~" would be attached in a Jap dialogue… but only to the complicated ones…] Matte kure, Nishi no Ekkusu!!! (Wait, "western X"!) [a/n: again, if I got wrong here, just tell me and I'll edit these thingies… TY ^_^]
[Since X can't understand ????'s language, he just ignored it. Well, ???? fell down the usual animé-style.]
????: ~I knew it. He can't understand me…~ [begins to become gloomy animé-style, then rises again determined with a clenched fist in a usual animé-style] ~…Then I have no choice. I'll make him attack me. ~ [a flash of light appears again in his right arm.]
X: [serious] Coocoo can sense something flowing.
nurse: Awwww… [to himself] *giggle* he's cute when he says something that way… I wanna make him mine!!!! Although… [to X] you should hold that water tank of yours 'til we get there, kiddo. I know it's overflowing already.
*insert charging buster sounds here*
????: [thinking] ~I hope this works…~
X: …Coocoo knows he'd heard that sound before…
nurse: Ooh… a cute flash of light… O.O
[They went near that light. Well, you know what'll happen to them… ^____^]
????: ~ Jeepers, Don't you even know how to dodge?~
X: [burnt] C-C-Coocoo… c-c-can't a-a-a-understand what strange… man says… [passes out]
????: [rough] Hei - Wisel - boi - dount - yu - knou - huu - ai - emm? (Hey, Weasel boy, don't you know who I am?)
X: [gets a little bit lively despite what happened to him] *gigglegiggle* Xl
????: Su -- piikku!!! (Speak!) .###
X: LOL XD
????: TORANSUREIIIITORUUUUUUU!!!!!! (translator!!!!) 0###
X: LOL XD
nurse: …Oh dear, he needs some depressant!
????: [rough] Yuu - wann - uh - dipuressunn? (You want a depressant?) ~.~####
nurse: *gigglegiggle* Xl
????: Ima, naniyou? (Now what?)
nurse: LOL XD
????: ~He really needs a depressant.~
[a flash of light appears at ????'s right arm and shoots the light at the nurse. Now, can you guess what'll happen here?]
[An injured samurai-like robot guy comes out from nowhere. I'm saying this once and I'll never say it again: A (~) is attached into a sentence spoken in Japanese! ]
robot: ~Sorry if I'm a bit late.~
????: ~Why only now? And… you seemed to be in a big mess! What happened to you?~
robot: ~Well, you see, I've got a fight out there.~
????: ~A fight?~
robot: ~I got to fight a blue robot who looks like a little kid… You see -- ~
????: ~Aww, heck… just do your job.~
robot: ~OK… Don't make it tough, though. I'm injured, you know.~
????: ~What are you talking about? This won't injure you even a bit!~
robot: ~It won't?~
????: ~Of course it won't!~
robot: [thinks] ~Hmmm… Maybe you'll give me a tough armor… just don't make it heavy, OK?~
????: ~Armor? Who says I'll give you armor?~
robot: ~Then my enemy will be a lot easy to fight.~
????: ~Enemy?~
robot: ~Yeah, enemy.~
????: BAKERU!!!! (idiot, some says it's bakero) ~You're going to fight against nobody!~ ~.~###
robot: ~Why? Isn't this some kind of a Rockman game, story, or whatever?~
????: ~OF COURSE THIS IS A ROCKMAN GAME, STORY OR WHATEVER!!! BUT YOU ARE--- …but yeah, this is a RM story… as long as I'm here… ~
robot: ~THEN WHO SHALL BE MY ENEMY?~
????: ~YOU ENEMY-LIKE IDIOT! [calms]…Wait, do you know how to translate Japanese into English?~
robot: ~What?~
????: [serious] ~I said, "Do you know how to translate Japanese into English?"~
robot: ~Try to play Rockman and Forte.~
[???? gets a SNES, a TV and a copy of the game "Rockman and Forte." While playing…]
robot: ~Try to get that CD thing there. [Points at the TV.] There. Now quit the stage, and go to the database… there, at data no. 48. Look at the data. [refer to Rockman and Forte]~
????: [confused] ~What?!? You're… Yamatoman?!?!~
robot: ~Now, according to the data, what do I like?~
????: Ni…hon… tou… [I don't know what that means… help!]
robot:~…And now, what do I hate?~
????: Ei…go. (English language, whatever)
robot: ~And now you're asking me to translate what that "blueguywholookslikerockman" says?~
????: ~Just go.~
[a flash of light appears at ????'s right arm and shoots the light at the robot guy (OK, he's Yamatoman, now you know!). Now, can you guess what'll happen here?]
Yamatoman: [as he flies through the air] ~AREN'T YOUUuuuuuu*~ *twinggggg*
????: ~Another translator please.~
[Izzy Glow comes in.]
????: ~Shining Firefly?!~
Izzy: [with manners; butler style] Excuse me, sir, but I may be a shining firefly but my name's Dr. Izzy Glow.
????: ~What the hell are you talking about? I can't even understand you a bit!~
Izzy: Sorry sir, I can decode languages into English and English only but I can't encode them back to whatever language you spoke.
????: ~I knew I have already beaten you…~
Izzy: The one who had beaten me surely is Megaman X, not some "stupidcreaturewhohiredsomeonewhohatesspeakingenglish" guy… ~_~
????: ~Damn you… I can't understand you…~
Izzy: *sticks out tongue* Nyeh, nyeh, he can't understand me! =p
????: [furious] Grrr… ~How dare you…~ . ###
Izzy: Heheheh… Yo quiero flores… (I like flowers… [Hey, Spanish people out there, am I right???])
????: ~You speaking Spanish there? I can distinguish the difference between English and Spanish but I can't understand them both…~
Izzy: Sí. (Yes. [Hey, Spanish people out there, am I right???])
????: ~I thought you can't encode languages…~
Izzy: [speaks some foul language] ^*(^$(^$(&^$(&!!! (^________________^)
X: [innocent] OOOoooh… Isn't that some bad language you spoke? O.O
Izzy: Yeah!!! [speaks some foul language] %$*&%$*%&#%&#!!! ^0^
X: Hey, cool! Lemme speak 'em too! ^___^
Izzy: Join me! [speaks some foul language] %^&^$%&$&*%$*%&!!! XD
X: COOOOL!!!! ^0^
Izzy: [speaks some foul language] ^*%*^%*^$&^$&!!! XD
X: [speaks some foul language] &%*^%^*%*^%!!! ^0^
????: . #################
[a flash of light appears at ????'s right arm and shoots the light at Izzy Glow. Now, can you guess what'll happen here?]
********************************************
[a/n: As I said, there are no foul languages here… Well, I have to conserve some clean minds here… Conserve clean minds!!! XP]
[Zero: What a speech. Hey, where is my part in this chapter??!]
[me: Well, uh… ^_^;;;;]
[Zero: WHERE - IS - MY- PART - IN - THIS - CHAPTER?!?!?! And I thought you can barely speak Japanese????? . #####]
[me: Well, uh… I lied. And of course I barely know Japanese…]
[Z: *hyper furious* . #####]
[****the clobbering between me and Zero begins here****]
[Alia: *from nowhere* Well, you know, the author is hyper lazy that she updates here once every one to two months, because she can't think of what'll happen to the next chapters, oh well, just read the part 1B here. Enjoy.]
********************************************
/////POST- PART 1A: IMPOSSIBLE THINGIES/////
[Why impossible? First: Zero-nii-san is here, second: I can speak Japanese here, and third: I can bash Zero up without any weapon at all]
????: [irritated] ~WHERE - IS - MY - TRANSLATOR????~ .#
??? [I repeat: That's me!!!!! _### anyways I'm battered. Damn Z.]: ~I can.~
Zero: [also battered, I'm strong, I think…] Damn… you… I… thought… you… can't… speak… Japa… nese…
???: Awww, shut up onii-san. I told you this is my fic, and I can do whatever I can… {you see, this is more like making a desperate fantasy thingy out of this fic, nee?}
[??? bashes Z up]
???: [just making out a fantasy… ^___^] ~Please forget about him. I'll be your translator since you can't understand English…~
????: Hai, hai, Wakatta. (Yeah, yeah, I know.)
--- PART 1B - REMEMBERING NAMES AIN'T EASY
[a/n: I don't have to tell you what happened, it'll be better if you read the first part first… ^_____^]
X: [afraid, speaks like a kiddo] Wh…who are you? I'm gonna tell mommy you're bullying me!
????: [whispering to ???] ~Can you tell what he says?~
???: [whispering to ????] ~Ummmm… he asks who you are and…~ [laughs] XD
????: [irritated] ~…and what?~
???: [trying to refrain from laughing] ~…and he's gonna call his mommy 'coz you're bullying him.~ XD
????: [irritated] Kono bakayarou… [this idiot…] ~…Your happiness is awfully shallow, and you're stupidly corny. Grrr… Just tell I'm X!!!~ .###
[a/n: to keep you from being confused, the Japanese X will be named RX (for Rockman X) and the Western X will be named as MX (for MegaMan X). Simple as that.]
???: [kinda speechless] Ee… -- …X? @o@ [thinks again] ~Oh yeah, you're X. I made this fic.~ ~_~
RX: [removes cloak] ~Of course it's me, X!!!~
???: …And now I know why. ~But he won't believe you for all I care.~
RX: ~…And how come?~
???: ~He calls himself Coocoo, and he can't even remember his name.~
RX: ~It has no connection to what I asked you a while ago.~
???: ~OK, OK. I'll tell him.~ ~_~# *sigh* ~I'll just install this to you and you'll understand what this X says. Same to him in installing…~
[and so I installed the translating software in the 2 Xs. I left. ^_^]
MX: He-hey! He looks exactly like me. And he IS exactly like me. Aren't you…
RX: You remember?
MX: An impostor!!! [gets a newspaper and tries to whack it into Rockman X.]
RX: Awww… shut up. [fires X-buster at the newspaper]
MX: Yowchie!!! That stings!!! But that light thing… It reminds me… Then you're also…
RX: Now YOU remember?
MX: …Coocoo!!!! Hey, wanna play with me?
RX: Idiot. .####
MX: *sob* You… called… me… *sniff* an… idiot?
RX: huh?
MX: [cries so loud and runs amok like a kiddy maniac]
RX: My gawd, what happened to you?
MX: You… *sniff* You… You… [cries ever so loud] YOU BAD GUY!!!! WAAAAAAAAAH!!!! I'M TELLING MOMMY!!!!
RX: You out of your mind? Maybe you do. If you don't behave I'll blast you into pieces. *charges X-Buster* ~_~###
MX: *sniff* OK, OK, Coocoo will behave. *sniff*
RX: Good. [to himself] *breathes deeply* Man, this is nothing more than babysitting. ~_~###
MX: *sniff* Why do you want me here anyway?
RX: Because it bugs me when someone who is "me" is in a mental hospital.
MX: [childish] But Coocoo ain't in a mental hospital…
RX: [irritated] …then where do you think you are right now?
MX: My playhouse.
RX: [more irritated] …and your playmates?
MX: Oh, they are inside right now. Mr. Izzy Glow is my playmate, too.
[a/n: to keep you from confusing, Izzy only knew that this X is nothing more than Coocoo, and since he and the other Mavs forgot what X really looked like… ^-^]
RX: [even more irritated] …and do you really remember your REAL name, not Coocoo?
MX: [sheepish] But my name is Coocoo…
RX: [patience: -15%] Idiot! Your name isn't Coocoo.
MX: [sheepish] Then what is my name?
RX: You know the alphabet right?
MX: I don't know all, but I'll try to know.
RX: [patience: -40%; speaking to himself] …You are not a human. You're a special type of a reploid who knows every lesson a teacher teaches… [mutters] [to MegaMan X] Now, state the alphabet.
MX: A, B… C… Uh, what's after C again?
RX: [patience: -45%] Idiot!! D. .###
MX: …Yeah! D! You're great! D… E… F…
[after 2 hours…]
MX: …What's after M again?
RX: [patience: -100%] Grrrrr… You… You… YOU IDIOT!!! HOW COME 2 HOURS HAVE PASSED YET YOU HAVEN'T STATED THE LETTER?!? 0####
MX: …V… W…
RX: [cools down] W… after W…
MX: …Y…
RX: [falls down animé-style] [patience: back to -100%] WHAT THE… HECK!!! DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT'S AFTER W?!?!? 0####
MX: Uh… Y of course.
RX: Grrrr… [cools down] State the alphabet again.
***Repeat the whole process of speaking the alphabet all over again.***
[after 1 day and 1 night…]
MX: …V… W… Y…
RX: [patience: -10000000000000000%] ^$#*^%#(&$(&^(^!!!!!!!!! YOU FORGOT THE LETTER AGAIN!!!!! _######
[and so Rokkuman Ekkusu (Rockman X) had a super hard time making MegaMan X state the alphabet Rock X wants him to state - X.]
----And now, I'll end this part of the chapter here, just wait for Z's part 'til I post it, OK?----
[extra: But you don't update your fic in a short time… I mean you make us wait for a long time!]
[Z: *injured and in pieces* …and you haven't made my part yet…]
[me: Awww… shut up!!!! *blasts Z and the extra into ashes*]