TITLE: Running CHAPTER 18 of many chapters
AUTHOR: Daaasl
RATING: R for language, violence and some sex
DISCLAIMER: The characters of Dominic, Leon, Vincent, Mia,
Brian, Jessie and Letty belong the film company. All the
other characters are mine all mine, though. Any copyright
infringement is unintended.
ARCHIVE: You can find previous chapters at:
http://www.realmofvindiesel.homestead.com Anyone else
wanting to post my fanfic on their site, please check with me.
FEEDBACK: Please. I like to know what you think. But be
gentle with me.
Three hours passed by with no word on Sarah's condition. While we all waited in the visitor's lounge, my mind raced. I grasped at every memory of Sarah that I had. I remembered her quick smiles and how her cheeks would flush when one of us would tease her. I thought about the way Sarah was so smart and quick to catch on to Dom's business requirements and help him out. I sat with my head in my hands and remembered her cheerful laughing and her sweet voice singing when she, Mia, and Letty would work together in the kitchen or sit out on the porch braiding each other's hair. I thought of how amazing it was that she treated people with kindness and genuine interest when she met them, even after all the abuse she had suffered. I thought I could still smell the honeysuckle scent of her hair and feel the warmth and comfort of her body spooned into mine; my arm wrapped around her as we slept. I thought about her initial caution and fear and then how she warmed up to all of us and accepted us as her family -- trusting us! I talked to God a lot in my head too. I begged. I raged. I made promises. Again and again, I asked God to let Sarah live and prayed that my memories of her wouldn't be the only thing left for me.
I looked up to see Mia sleeping with Brian's arm around her, directly across from me. Jesse was still curled up against the wall to my left and Letty had come over to sit next to me on my right, her arm tucked into the crook of my arm. Dom had taken Vince home so he could get cleaned up and change clothes. I had been glad to see Dominic leave. I'd felt such hatred towards him that I couldn't stand the sight of him. I was afraid Dom and I would both wind up in the ER if he stayed around me any longer.
I looked around at the faces of my friends, sitting with me in the lounge, all worn and tired. In spite of the stress and fear, a flash of hope washed over me. We were hanging together during this crisis, instead of being scattered to the four winds, hiding out from the cops like the last time shit hit the fan. We were all here together, pulling for Sarah. I hoped that somehow she would know she wasn't alone. I took one last glance look at the faces of the team -- the only family that had ever loved me, before I closed my eyes and drifted into a shallow and troubled sleep.
A hand shaking my knee awoke me and I opened my eyes to see Vince standing in front of me in clean clothes, with a couple of band-aids wrapped around his scraped knuckles. I looked around to see the rest of the team still sleeping, before I looked back at V.
"Wassup Dawg?" I asked in a voice groggy with sleep.
"No word yet?" Vince asked.
I shook my head and dropped my eyes so V. couldn't see my pain. "Naw!" I replied in a low voice.
"C'mere Brother, I want to show you something" V. said, signaling me with a quick nod of his head, in the direction he wanted me to follow. I gently removed Letty's arm from mine, stood up slowly, stretched painfully and then followed Vince into another part of the lounge area, further away from the rest of our sleeping team. V. had his back turned to me.
"V? Wassup?" I asked.
Vince turned to me and held out a silver case. "Before I pulled Sarah out of her car --" his voice broke. "She was desperate that I get this out of there too. I thought -- Well, you know. In case anything happened. . . " he stuttered. Vince's eyes reflected his own pain. "I thought you would want it." he spoke sofly. Vince turned the silver case over slowly a couple of times, looked up at me and then put it in my hands. I looked down at it resting there and saw the dents; the dried blood stains and dirt in the hinges and the catch. I couldn't meet V.'s eyes. I just nodded and shut my own briefly, while I silently and desperately wished the nightmare would be over.
"I'm sorry Brother, I tried to clean it up the best I could." he said, resting a hand on my shoulder. I looked up into Vince's sympathetic face and nodded my head.
"V. -- I . . ." I stopped. No matter how hard I tried, the words weren't coming.
"Hey my brother. It's o.k. I'm just glad I was behind her and could get to her in time."
"Me too V." Dominic's voice sounded from behind me. I whipped around to see Dom standing in the doorway. The fury that I thought had subsided, surged to the top again as I stared at him. Dom's eyes were full of sadness and guilt. Good I thought! I hope Dom feels the guilt burning him up inside, exactly the way I feel it burning me up. Because I listened to him, Sarah is fighting for her life right now.
"Dawg, I can't see you." the words were expelled from my lips in warning as they forced their way out of my clenched jaw. I heard the team stirring as they woke at the sounds of voices and conflict.
"Leon, you have to listen to me. I know how angry you are man. I can see it in your eyes. None of this was your fault Leon." Dom said, stepping into the lounge.
"Dom!" Letty cautioned, as she unfolded herself from the couch where she had been sitting.
I felt myself tense at the sound of his voice and I felt my anger swell even more. "Dom, man. I already told you. NOT NOW!" I shouted with my fists clenched as tight as my jaw. The rage began to shake my hard and I started to walk towards Dom slowly.
"Leon, she could have been anything. A spy -- a narc---" Dom didn't get any further. I lost all control and flew the last 8 feet between me and Dom. I slammed him hard against the wall, my hands closing around his throat. Black rage seethed through every inch of me. I heard Vince yell "Stop bro!" and the sounds of Brian and Jesse jumping to their feet in confusion. Mia cried out "No! Don"t!" and Letty yelled out to Dom to watch out. But it was too late. Dominic looked over my shoulder at Vince and the team and shook his head slightly in my grip before returning his gaze to my eyes. He offered no resistance and waited calmly -- finally speaking to me quietly.
"I could get you off of me if I wanted to Leon."
"FUCK YOU!" I roared in his face.
"Leon all I'm saying is-"
"BULLSHIT! It's all bullshit Dom. That girl was never a threat to the team! You pushed too hard man. You pushed me too far, and you pushed her out. If she don't make it Dom, then you have pushed me out too!"
I let Dom go with a final angry push at him against the wall. I turned and grabbed Sarah's case and left the lounge. I strode down the corridor and felt my anger and despair threatening to topple me over the edge.
When I got outside the front doors and to the smokers pavilion, I lit up a cigarette. I took a few long drags and waited for my shaking rage to slow. Waiting to hear word about Sarah was killing me. I looked down at my watch. It was closing in on 11 p.m. Shit! I had completely forgotten. There was a race coming up tonight. Well fuck it! I wasn't going to be their watch dog tonight to protect them. My mind finally registered that Dominic had been wearing his racing gear when he had come back with Vince to the visitor's lounge. He was in his racing gear! Dom must have changed when he took Vince home. I looked back to see Dom talking to Letty. Brian and Mia stood together listening to the exchange between Dom and Letty, while Jesse rubbed at his sleepy eyes. Vince was looking anxiously in my direction, where I stood outside the doors.
After a couple of minutes I saw Dom turn, and with Jesse following, walk down the hall towards me.
When they came through the doors and over to where I stood, Dom spoke. "Ummmm. Leon. I umm, well, since there's no word yet -- ".
"Go on Jesse, and take his punk ass with you." I said, pointing to Dom. Dom just looked at me hard and then shook his head. I glared back.
"Leon, we will be back if nothing is going on but --" said Letty, who had just come through the doors behind Dom and Jesse.
"I know." I interrupted her. "You gotta make an appearance to save face. Right Dom?"
Dom just looked at me with sadness and pain in his dark eyes.
"I love you Dawg. Believe me. You are my brother and I am sorry for your grief" he said slowly.
"Fuck you" I yelled at him. Dom turned and began walking away. Letty and Jesse followed him.
"Fuck you, God damn it!" I yelled at Dom again, but none of them turned around. When they disappeared around the corner, I ground out my cigarette, grabbed Sarah's case, and headed back down the hall to the lounge. Mia was still there, but I didn't see V. or Brian.
"Hey woman." I said softly. Mia looked back at me with eyes puffy from the tears she had shed. We were all looking pretty rocky. She stretched her back a little, with her hands on her hips, and then asked me. "How are you holding up Leon?"
"Not good Mia. The waiting is killing me." I told her.
"I'm so sorry Leon. She looked down at the floor and sighed. "We have to let the doctor do their magic." she sympathized. "I just wish we could be in there with her to let her know she's not alone. She looked up into my face. "I don't want her to wake up alone and lost in here." Mia said sadly.
"Where's V and Bri?" I asked, trying to distract us both from our grim thoughts.
"They went to get us some coffee." she said with another deep sigh.
"A'ight. Can I keep this with you" I said, pointing down to the silver suitcase.
"Uh.Yeah.what is that?"
"Sarah's stuff. Vince got it out of the car." I said as I tucked the case under Mia's chair before I put my arm around her shoulders and she buried her face in my chest. We sat down again and waited. We waited for word from someone; waited for V. and Brian to come back; and waited for the nightmare to end.
***** Vince's POV *****
When I heard Leon yelling at Dom outside, I knew I had to tell Brian about what I had seen during the car chase, before Leon came back into the lounge.
"Yo Brian. Come and let's go get some coffee for everybody." I said. Brian, being the punk that he is, looked at Mia for silent permission. I rolled my eyes and waited until he got up and came with me. As soon as we got around the corner from the lounge, I stopped him.
"Hey man. I saw something when we were trying to catch up to Sarah in her T- Bird." I told Brian.
"What are you talking about?" Brian asked in confusion.
"Man, when I caught up to Sarah, there was already somebody following her. Someone was right on her tail!"
"What!" he shouted.
"Shh. Jesus! Keep your damn voice down Brian! For an ex-cop, you sure aren't very cool." Brian just gave me a dirty look.
Hey, what can I say? I take shots at Brian any chance I get, no matter what the circumstances.
"Look." I said. "I'm telling you because we got to keep a look out. I already told Dom what I saw, but I don't think Leon should know yet. He's wrecked enough as it is."
"Yeah, I agree." Brian replied. What kind of car was it?"
"Black Cadillac Escalade, with mirror-tinted windows, out of state license plates, but I couldn't get close enough to see which state it was from. What color are Jersey plates?" I asked Brian.
"Yellow -- or Blue I think." said Brian.
"Nah, man. I don't know. They could have been yellow," I told Brian, "but they were definitely not blue."
"I'd call this in V, but with no i.d. on the plates ---" Brian shrugged his shoulders.
"Yeah. Hell, I know. But at least we know this Escalade is something to watch out for. Dom is going to the races tonight to see if he can get any info on the Caddy. See if anyone saw it recently." I told him.
Brian nodded, now realizing why Dom had left. We continued our walk to go get some coffee. When we came back Mia was curled up against Leon, sitting on one of the big couches. Poor Leon had a blank, dead stare on his face. He looked completely lost and for a minute I wondered if he even registered that we had come back in with coffee. Sarah had only been with us at the house for 2 weeks, but Leon had known her for a little more than 3. I would have thought that 3 weeks wasn't long enough to have any real connection to someone new and unknown like she was, but it seemed like something about Sarah really hooked Leon hard. I found myself surprised to see how serious Leon was. His eyes had been lit up with a lot of happiness lately, but now all I could see was pain and loss in his eyes.
"Here, you two. Something to keep your blood circulating." I said, handing them the tall cups of coffee. They each nodded to Brian and me and took the cups. Leon raised his cup to his lips, looking up at me, and then past me. Suddenly he shot to his feet, spilling the coffee to the floor.
I looked behind me to see the doctor coming toward us, down the corridor. Leon pushed past me and ran to meet him halfway. The rest of us turned and rushed to follow Leon.
********* Leon's Pov *********
"Well." said the surgeon, "I am glad to be bringing you all good news. When the worst of Ms. Ippolito's swelling subsided we were able to perform necessary surgery and she did fine."
I heard myself, and the rest breathe deep sighs of relief. The tension began to leave my chest as I exhaled, and my battered and aching heart seemed to revive and felt lighter and more hopeful.
The doctor continued. "Ms. Ippolito's surgery was extensive and she will need time to recover. Please, have some seats and I will explain." The Doctor led the way back to our seats in the lounge where Dom and I had nearly gotten into a fight an hour before. All of us sat down, waiting impatiently for the doctor to begin.
The doctor sat down in a chair across from us, looked directly at me and said, "Your fiance' is a very strong young woman." I nodded and didn't bother to correct the doctor. He continued, "The medical records your brother gave us helped us out a lot." I looked over at V, confused. V. mouthed the word 'Dom', and I frowned, returning my attention to the doctor and his words.
"The impact from the accident broke Ms. Ippolito's fourth, fifth and sixth ribs on her left side. Most of the worst damage was on that side of her body. Her lung and spleen were both punctured. We preformed a splenectomy and a thoracotomy to repair the damage."
"Whoa doc. You lost me." I said in come confusion.
Mia spoke up softly and said "They removed her spleen and repaired her lung, right Doctor?"
"That's right" he nodded. "Actually the tear in her lung was pretty large and ragged, so we removed a portion of her lower left lung instead of trying to repair the extensive damages. Because of the severity of the tear, the only way we could know for sure it wouldn't rupture again was to remove the damaged portion."
"So Sarah will only have one lung?" I said, trying to keep my composure.
"No. She will have one and three quarters of healthy lungs." the doctor replied. "Many people are able to live with less. She also had a number of surface wounds that required attention. Luckily she broke no bones in her limbs, although she seems to have sprained her left wrist in the incident. She also sustained a nasty bruise to her upper chest that will be uncomfortable for awhile. We also had to take stitches in some places due to glass cuts; mostly on her left arm and leg." he said getting up. "I think you will all be glad to know that the swelling in her brain has gone down completely and that her concussion no longer seems to be serious. She hasn't regained consciousness yet, but we think with some more rest she should wake up any time. It's all depending on her."
"Can I see her now?" I asked with desperation in my voice.
"Not yet. I'm sorry. She is in the recovery room right now, being monitored. As soon as the anesthesiologist o.k.s it, we'll move her to ICU where we can monitor her recovery closely. I will be back for you when she is moved and you will be able to see her briefly. I must warn you, that her injuries will look very bad for a few more days." The Doctor turned back to the doors saying "You can reach me by contacting the nurses station on this floor." Then, as if remembering something he turned back once more and beckoned to me.
"Can I talk to you?" he asked.
"Yeah sure." I said following the doctor into the hallway.
The doctor turned to face me, and said, "I am sorry to have to ask you this question, but it is hospital procedure. I am mandated by law to inquire in cases like this. How long have you and your fiancée been together?
Startled, I replied honestly. "Not very long. Why do you ask?"
Instead of answering, the doctor asked another question. "Has your fiancée ever sustained other serious bodily injury in any other accidents?" he asked looking at me closely.
Confused, I replied. "Not to my knowledge, no."
The doctor then closed his eyes and sighed. "Have you ever struck your fiancée or physically abused her in any way?
In shock, I blurted, "What? Christ no! I could never lay a hand on Sarah in anger!"
The doctor searched my eyes a moment longer. Then reaching out his hand to touch my arm he said, "All right. Please, calm down son. As I told you, I am required by law to ask these questions. The medical records your brother gave us did seem to indicate that most of her old injuries were sustained while she was living on the east coast. Because of your obvious concern, I suspected that you weren't the abuser, but the X-rays and surgery showed us that this young woman has really been through a lot of previous physical trauma. I needed to assure myself that she wasn't going to be subjected to that kind of treatment after she left here." said the doctor.
Helplessly, I nodded in agreement, unable to comprehend completely what the doctor was saying.
"I am terribly sorry to have to tell you, because of the pain it may cause you, but we also discovered that your fiancé was 5 weeks pregnant at the time of her accident." Stunned, my eyes widened in disbelief and shock.
Observing my reaction, the doctor continued. "The trauma she suffered from the accident, combined with the emergency surgery caused her to lose the baby. I'm very sorry about the loss of your child son." Through my confusion and shock, I felt the comfort of the doctor's hand on my arm. It was the first time anyone besides the team had been so kind to me. I grabbed his hand and squeezed it briefly and thanked him for his kindness towards Sarah and me, before I turned and walked back into the lounge.
The faces of the team looked up at me in question, but I had no answers for them. I held up my hand palm outward, indicating that I didn't want anyone to follow me and then I turned around and headed outside. I walked down the hall, past the nurses station, out through the smoking area in front of the hospital, and I kept on walking. I remember walking down streets in a daze for what seemed like a long time, until I found myself standing on a street sidewalk under a highway underpass. That was when I broke.
My mouth opened and a bellow of pain and rage escaped me at the top of my lungs. The sounds consisted of wordless howls and shouted swearing. I could no longer hold back all the fear and fury about coming so close to losing Sarah. I raged that she had been repeatedly hurt and abused in her past and that my betrayal had hurt her even more. Yowling with grief, I thought of the baby that she had lost and my blind ignorance about what life had been like for Sarah and what she might have experienced before I found her and she slipped into my heart.
I saw a concrete block on the ground that had probably fallen from a construction truck. With another roar, I picked it up and heaved it at the concrete embankment with all my strength. I saw it explode into pieces, scattering everywhere. My eyes searched for anything else I could throw. In my fit I threw rocks, dirt clods, and beer bottles that I found littering the ground. My fury knew no bounds as I continued to alternate between yelling and shouting my anger and pain. I saw the corner stop sign on my left, rushed over to it. I attacked it, pushing and pulling furiously until I was able to rip it free from the ground. With my hands bloody with splinters and cuts, I turned and heaved the whole sign at the embankment, narrowly missing Vince's head as I released it from my grip.
The presence of another human being nearby stopped me cold.
"Leon! Come on man. Don't do this to yourself." Vince said, walking slowly towards me with his arms down to his sides, palms up.
I recognized Vince and as suddenly as my towering rage had arrived, it left, and I sagged in exhaustion. My frenzied outburst had left my throat and voice raw. "Jesus Vince!" I rasped. "I can't deal with this emotional shit! I feel like it is fucking killing me. The last time I felt this bad was when I almost lost you, Jesse and Letty in the same day! And I'd known all of you since I was fourteen years old man! I've only known Sarah for 3 and a half weeks! What the fuck is going on that I've let this girl get to me like this?" I've barely even know anything about her! I must be losing my God-damned mind!" I groaned.
Vince looked at me with pity in his eyes and said "Love has no timetable my brother."
I looked at Vince in shock. "What did you say?" I asked him in disbelief.
"I'm telling you true brother. You love her man." Vince moved closer to me and said, "So stop acting like an asshole, and let's go back to the hospital. You'll be able to see Sarah as soon as they get her into ICU."
"She doesn't want to see me." I hung my head in grief.
"Maybe you're right." V. said. "But then maybe one of us can explain everything to her and get her to understand."
"She's been through so much hell already Dawg."
"Ain't nobody gonna yell at the girl bro. Shit!! She just had major surgery. We aren't stupid, but she needs to give us a chance and she needs to listen to the truth." he said.
"We should have told her a long time ago." I growled.
"Maybe so." Vince said calmly. But we can't do nothing to change what's past now, can we." he said flatly.
I shook my head in disgust, knowing what he said was true.
"Right. So get your crazy ass together, and come on back to the hospital with me now." he ordered. I glared at him, but Vince held my stare steadily and waited patiently. After a minute or two I realized I couldn't stare him down. I finally gave in and let out a rueful laugh. "You are a very intimidating dude, Dawg!" I joked with him.
Vince grabbed me, gave me a rough hug and released me.
"Yeah. Well, sometimes this 'ol' coyote' has more sense than you realize." Vince said, with a toothy grin. "You just be remembering that, brother."
He slapped me on the back in encouragement and we turned and began our walk back to the hospital.
Three hours passed by with no word on Sarah's condition. While we all waited in the visitor's lounge, my mind raced. I grasped at every memory of Sarah that I had. I remembered her quick smiles and how her cheeks would flush when one of us would tease her. I thought about the way Sarah was so smart and quick to catch on to Dom's business requirements and help him out. I sat with my head in my hands and remembered her cheerful laughing and her sweet voice singing when she, Mia, and Letty would work together in the kitchen or sit out on the porch braiding each other's hair. I thought of how amazing it was that she treated people with kindness and genuine interest when she met them, even after all the abuse she had suffered. I thought I could still smell the honeysuckle scent of her hair and feel the warmth and comfort of her body spooned into mine; my arm wrapped around her as we slept. I thought about her initial caution and fear and then how she warmed up to all of us and accepted us as her family -- trusting us! I talked to God a lot in my head too. I begged. I raged. I made promises. Again and again, I asked God to let Sarah live and prayed that my memories of her wouldn't be the only thing left for me.
I looked up to see Mia sleeping with Brian's arm around her, directly across from me. Jesse was still curled up against the wall to my left and Letty had come over to sit next to me on my right, her arm tucked into the crook of my arm. Dom had taken Vince home so he could get cleaned up and change clothes. I had been glad to see Dominic leave. I'd felt such hatred towards him that I couldn't stand the sight of him. I was afraid Dom and I would both wind up in the ER if he stayed around me any longer.
I looked around at the faces of my friends, sitting with me in the lounge, all worn and tired. In spite of the stress and fear, a flash of hope washed over me. We were hanging together during this crisis, instead of being scattered to the four winds, hiding out from the cops like the last time shit hit the fan. We were all here together, pulling for Sarah. I hoped that somehow she would know she wasn't alone. I took one last glance look at the faces of the team -- the only family that had ever loved me, before I closed my eyes and drifted into a shallow and troubled sleep.
A hand shaking my knee awoke me and I opened my eyes to see Vince standing in front of me in clean clothes, with a couple of band-aids wrapped around his scraped knuckles. I looked around to see the rest of the team still sleeping, before I looked back at V.
"Wassup Dawg?" I asked in a voice groggy with sleep.
"No word yet?" Vince asked.
I shook my head and dropped my eyes so V. couldn't see my pain. "Naw!" I replied in a low voice.
"C'mere Brother, I want to show you something" V. said, signaling me with a quick nod of his head, in the direction he wanted me to follow. I gently removed Letty's arm from mine, stood up slowly, stretched painfully and then followed Vince into another part of the lounge area, further away from the rest of our sleeping team. V. had his back turned to me.
"V? Wassup?" I asked.
Vince turned to me and held out a silver case. "Before I pulled Sarah out of her car --" his voice broke. "She was desperate that I get this out of there too. I thought -- Well, you know. In case anything happened. . . " he stuttered. Vince's eyes reflected his own pain. "I thought you would want it." he spoke sofly. Vince turned the silver case over slowly a couple of times, looked up at me and then put it in my hands. I looked down at it resting there and saw the dents; the dried blood stains and dirt in the hinges and the catch. I couldn't meet V.'s eyes. I just nodded and shut my own briefly, while I silently and desperately wished the nightmare would be over.
"I'm sorry Brother, I tried to clean it up the best I could." he said, resting a hand on my shoulder. I looked up into Vince's sympathetic face and nodded my head.
"V. -- I . . ." I stopped. No matter how hard I tried, the words weren't coming.
"Hey my brother. It's o.k. I'm just glad I was behind her and could get to her in time."
"Me too V." Dominic's voice sounded from behind me. I whipped around to see Dom standing in the doorway. The fury that I thought had subsided, surged to the top again as I stared at him. Dom's eyes were full of sadness and guilt. Good I thought! I hope Dom feels the guilt burning him up inside, exactly the way I feel it burning me up. Because I listened to him, Sarah is fighting for her life right now.
"Dawg, I can't see you." the words were expelled from my lips in warning as they forced their way out of my clenched jaw. I heard the team stirring as they woke at the sounds of voices and conflict.
"Leon, you have to listen to me. I know how angry you are man. I can see it in your eyes. None of this was your fault Leon." Dom said, stepping into the lounge.
"Dom!" Letty cautioned, as she unfolded herself from the couch where she had been sitting.
I felt myself tense at the sound of his voice and I felt my anger swell even more. "Dom, man. I already told you. NOT NOW!" I shouted with my fists clenched as tight as my jaw. The rage began to shake my hard and I started to walk towards Dom slowly.
"Leon, she could have been anything. A spy -- a narc---" Dom didn't get any further. I lost all control and flew the last 8 feet between me and Dom. I slammed him hard against the wall, my hands closing around his throat. Black rage seethed through every inch of me. I heard Vince yell "Stop bro!" and the sounds of Brian and Jesse jumping to their feet in confusion. Mia cried out "No! Don"t!" and Letty yelled out to Dom to watch out. But it was too late. Dominic looked over my shoulder at Vince and the team and shook his head slightly in my grip before returning his gaze to my eyes. He offered no resistance and waited calmly -- finally speaking to me quietly.
"I could get you off of me if I wanted to Leon."
"FUCK YOU!" I roared in his face.
"Leon all I'm saying is-"
"BULLSHIT! It's all bullshit Dom. That girl was never a threat to the team! You pushed too hard man. You pushed me too far, and you pushed her out. If she don't make it Dom, then you have pushed me out too!"
I let Dom go with a final angry push at him against the wall. I turned and grabbed Sarah's case and left the lounge. I strode down the corridor and felt my anger and despair threatening to topple me over the edge.
When I got outside the front doors and to the smokers pavilion, I lit up a cigarette. I took a few long drags and waited for my shaking rage to slow. Waiting to hear word about Sarah was killing me. I looked down at my watch. It was closing in on 11 p.m. Shit! I had completely forgotten. There was a race coming up tonight. Well fuck it! I wasn't going to be their watch dog tonight to protect them. My mind finally registered that Dominic had been wearing his racing gear when he had come back with Vince to the visitor's lounge. He was in his racing gear! Dom must have changed when he took Vince home. I looked back to see Dom talking to Letty. Brian and Mia stood together listening to the exchange between Dom and Letty, while Jesse rubbed at his sleepy eyes. Vince was looking anxiously in my direction, where I stood outside the doors.
After a couple of minutes I saw Dom turn, and with Jesse following, walk down the hall towards me.
When they came through the doors and over to where I stood, Dom spoke. "Ummmm. Leon. I umm, well, since there's no word yet -- ".
"Go on Jesse, and take his punk ass with you." I said, pointing to Dom. Dom just looked at me hard and then shook his head. I glared back.
"Leon, we will be back if nothing is going on but --" said Letty, who had just come through the doors behind Dom and Jesse.
"I know." I interrupted her. "You gotta make an appearance to save face. Right Dom?"
Dom just looked at me with sadness and pain in his dark eyes.
"I love you Dawg. Believe me. You are my brother and I am sorry for your grief" he said slowly.
"Fuck you" I yelled at him. Dom turned and began walking away. Letty and Jesse followed him.
"Fuck you, God damn it!" I yelled at Dom again, but none of them turned around. When they disappeared around the corner, I ground out my cigarette, grabbed Sarah's case, and headed back down the hall to the lounge. Mia was still there, but I didn't see V. or Brian.
"Hey woman." I said softly. Mia looked back at me with eyes puffy from the tears she had shed. We were all looking pretty rocky. She stretched her back a little, with her hands on her hips, and then asked me. "How are you holding up Leon?"
"Not good Mia. The waiting is killing me." I told her.
"I'm so sorry Leon. She looked down at the floor and sighed. "We have to let the doctor do their magic." she sympathized. "I just wish we could be in there with her to let her know she's not alone. She looked up into my face. "I don't want her to wake up alone and lost in here." Mia said sadly.
"Where's V and Bri?" I asked, trying to distract us both from our grim thoughts.
"They went to get us some coffee." she said with another deep sigh.
"A'ight. Can I keep this with you" I said, pointing down to the silver suitcase.
"Uh.Yeah.what is that?"
"Sarah's stuff. Vince got it out of the car." I said as I tucked the case under Mia's chair before I put my arm around her shoulders and she buried her face in my chest. We sat down again and waited. We waited for word from someone; waited for V. and Brian to come back; and waited for the nightmare to end.
***** Vince's POV *****
When I heard Leon yelling at Dom outside, I knew I had to tell Brian about what I had seen during the car chase, before Leon came back into the lounge.
"Yo Brian. Come and let's go get some coffee for everybody." I said. Brian, being the punk that he is, looked at Mia for silent permission. I rolled my eyes and waited until he got up and came with me. As soon as we got around the corner from the lounge, I stopped him.
"Hey man. I saw something when we were trying to catch up to Sarah in her T- Bird." I told Brian.
"What are you talking about?" Brian asked in confusion.
"Man, when I caught up to Sarah, there was already somebody following her. Someone was right on her tail!"
"What!" he shouted.
"Shh. Jesus! Keep your damn voice down Brian! For an ex-cop, you sure aren't very cool." Brian just gave me a dirty look.
Hey, what can I say? I take shots at Brian any chance I get, no matter what the circumstances.
"Look." I said. "I'm telling you because we got to keep a look out. I already told Dom what I saw, but I don't think Leon should know yet. He's wrecked enough as it is."
"Yeah, I agree." Brian replied. What kind of car was it?"
"Black Cadillac Escalade, with mirror-tinted windows, out of state license plates, but I couldn't get close enough to see which state it was from. What color are Jersey plates?" I asked Brian.
"Yellow -- or Blue I think." said Brian.
"Nah, man. I don't know. They could have been yellow," I told Brian, "but they were definitely not blue."
"I'd call this in V, but with no i.d. on the plates ---" Brian shrugged his shoulders.
"Yeah. Hell, I know. But at least we know this Escalade is something to watch out for. Dom is going to the races tonight to see if he can get any info on the Caddy. See if anyone saw it recently." I told him.
Brian nodded, now realizing why Dom had left. We continued our walk to go get some coffee. When we came back Mia was curled up against Leon, sitting on one of the big couches. Poor Leon had a blank, dead stare on his face. He looked completely lost and for a minute I wondered if he even registered that we had come back in with coffee. Sarah had only been with us at the house for 2 weeks, but Leon had known her for a little more than 3. I would have thought that 3 weeks wasn't long enough to have any real connection to someone new and unknown like she was, but it seemed like something about Sarah really hooked Leon hard. I found myself surprised to see how serious Leon was. His eyes had been lit up with a lot of happiness lately, but now all I could see was pain and loss in his eyes.
"Here, you two. Something to keep your blood circulating." I said, handing them the tall cups of coffee. They each nodded to Brian and me and took the cups. Leon raised his cup to his lips, looking up at me, and then past me. Suddenly he shot to his feet, spilling the coffee to the floor.
I looked behind me to see the doctor coming toward us, down the corridor. Leon pushed past me and ran to meet him halfway. The rest of us turned and rushed to follow Leon.
********* Leon's Pov *********
"Well." said the surgeon, "I am glad to be bringing you all good news. When the worst of Ms. Ippolito's swelling subsided we were able to perform necessary surgery and she did fine."
I heard myself, and the rest breathe deep sighs of relief. The tension began to leave my chest as I exhaled, and my battered and aching heart seemed to revive and felt lighter and more hopeful.
The doctor continued. "Ms. Ippolito's surgery was extensive and she will need time to recover. Please, have some seats and I will explain." The Doctor led the way back to our seats in the lounge where Dom and I had nearly gotten into a fight an hour before. All of us sat down, waiting impatiently for the doctor to begin.
The doctor sat down in a chair across from us, looked directly at me and said, "Your fiance' is a very strong young woman." I nodded and didn't bother to correct the doctor. He continued, "The medical records your brother gave us helped us out a lot." I looked over at V, confused. V. mouthed the word 'Dom', and I frowned, returning my attention to the doctor and his words.
"The impact from the accident broke Ms. Ippolito's fourth, fifth and sixth ribs on her left side. Most of the worst damage was on that side of her body. Her lung and spleen were both punctured. We preformed a splenectomy and a thoracotomy to repair the damage."
"Whoa doc. You lost me." I said in come confusion.
Mia spoke up softly and said "They removed her spleen and repaired her lung, right Doctor?"
"That's right" he nodded. "Actually the tear in her lung was pretty large and ragged, so we removed a portion of her lower left lung instead of trying to repair the extensive damages. Because of the severity of the tear, the only way we could know for sure it wouldn't rupture again was to remove the damaged portion."
"So Sarah will only have one lung?" I said, trying to keep my composure.
"No. She will have one and three quarters of healthy lungs." the doctor replied. "Many people are able to live with less. She also had a number of surface wounds that required attention. Luckily she broke no bones in her limbs, although she seems to have sprained her left wrist in the incident. She also sustained a nasty bruise to her upper chest that will be uncomfortable for awhile. We also had to take stitches in some places due to glass cuts; mostly on her left arm and leg." he said getting up. "I think you will all be glad to know that the swelling in her brain has gone down completely and that her concussion no longer seems to be serious. She hasn't regained consciousness yet, but we think with some more rest she should wake up any time. It's all depending on her."
"Can I see her now?" I asked with desperation in my voice.
"Not yet. I'm sorry. She is in the recovery room right now, being monitored. As soon as the anesthesiologist o.k.s it, we'll move her to ICU where we can monitor her recovery closely. I will be back for you when she is moved and you will be able to see her briefly. I must warn you, that her injuries will look very bad for a few more days." The Doctor turned back to the doors saying "You can reach me by contacting the nurses station on this floor." Then, as if remembering something he turned back once more and beckoned to me.
"Can I talk to you?" he asked.
"Yeah sure." I said following the doctor into the hallway.
The doctor turned to face me, and said, "I am sorry to have to ask you this question, but it is hospital procedure. I am mandated by law to inquire in cases like this. How long have you and your fiancée been together?
Startled, I replied honestly. "Not very long. Why do you ask?"
Instead of answering, the doctor asked another question. "Has your fiancée ever sustained other serious bodily injury in any other accidents?" he asked looking at me closely.
Confused, I replied. "Not to my knowledge, no."
The doctor then closed his eyes and sighed. "Have you ever struck your fiancée or physically abused her in any way?
In shock, I blurted, "What? Christ no! I could never lay a hand on Sarah in anger!"
The doctor searched my eyes a moment longer. Then reaching out his hand to touch my arm he said, "All right. Please, calm down son. As I told you, I am required by law to ask these questions. The medical records your brother gave us did seem to indicate that most of her old injuries were sustained while she was living on the east coast. Because of your obvious concern, I suspected that you weren't the abuser, but the X-rays and surgery showed us that this young woman has really been through a lot of previous physical trauma. I needed to assure myself that she wasn't going to be subjected to that kind of treatment after she left here." said the doctor.
Helplessly, I nodded in agreement, unable to comprehend completely what the doctor was saying.
"I am terribly sorry to have to tell you, because of the pain it may cause you, but we also discovered that your fiancé was 5 weeks pregnant at the time of her accident." Stunned, my eyes widened in disbelief and shock.
Observing my reaction, the doctor continued. "The trauma she suffered from the accident, combined with the emergency surgery caused her to lose the baby. I'm very sorry about the loss of your child son." Through my confusion and shock, I felt the comfort of the doctor's hand on my arm. It was the first time anyone besides the team had been so kind to me. I grabbed his hand and squeezed it briefly and thanked him for his kindness towards Sarah and me, before I turned and walked back into the lounge.
The faces of the team looked up at me in question, but I had no answers for them. I held up my hand palm outward, indicating that I didn't want anyone to follow me and then I turned around and headed outside. I walked down the hall, past the nurses station, out through the smoking area in front of the hospital, and I kept on walking. I remember walking down streets in a daze for what seemed like a long time, until I found myself standing on a street sidewalk under a highway underpass. That was when I broke.
My mouth opened and a bellow of pain and rage escaped me at the top of my lungs. The sounds consisted of wordless howls and shouted swearing. I could no longer hold back all the fear and fury about coming so close to losing Sarah. I raged that she had been repeatedly hurt and abused in her past and that my betrayal had hurt her even more. Yowling with grief, I thought of the baby that she had lost and my blind ignorance about what life had been like for Sarah and what she might have experienced before I found her and she slipped into my heart.
I saw a concrete block on the ground that had probably fallen from a construction truck. With another roar, I picked it up and heaved it at the concrete embankment with all my strength. I saw it explode into pieces, scattering everywhere. My eyes searched for anything else I could throw. In my fit I threw rocks, dirt clods, and beer bottles that I found littering the ground. My fury knew no bounds as I continued to alternate between yelling and shouting my anger and pain. I saw the corner stop sign on my left, rushed over to it. I attacked it, pushing and pulling furiously until I was able to rip it free from the ground. With my hands bloody with splinters and cuts, I turned and heaved the whole sign at the embankment, narrowly missing Vince's head as I released it from my grip.
The presence of another human being nearby stopped me cold.
"Leon! Come on man. Don't do this to yourself." Vince said, walking slowly towards me with his arms down to his sides, palms up.
I recognized Vince and as suddenly as my towering rage had arrived, it left, and I sagged in exhaustion. My frenzied outburst had left my throat and voice raw. "Jesus Vince!" I rasped. "I can't deal with this emotional shit! I feel like it is fucking killing me. The last time I felt this bad was when I almost lost you, Jesse and Letty in the same day! And I'd known all of you since I was fourteen years old man! I've only known Sarah for 3 and a half weeks! What the fuck is going on that I've let this girl get to me like this?" I've barely even know anything about her! I must be losing my God-damned mind!" I groaned.
Vince looked at me with pity in his eyes and said "Love has no timetable my brother."
I looked at Vince in shock. "What did you say?" I asked him in disbelief.
"I'm telling you true brother. You love her man." Vince moved closer to me and said, "So stop acting like an asshole, and let's go back to the hospital. You'll be able to see Sarah as soon as they get her into ICU."
"She doesn't want to see me." I hung my head in grief.
"Maybe you're right." V. said. "But then maybe one of us can explain everything to her and get her to understand."
"She's been through so much hell already Dawg."
"Ain't nobody gonna yell at the girl bro. Shit!! She just had major surgery. We aren't stupid, but she needs to give us a chance and she needs to listen to the truth." he said.
"We should have told her a long time ago." I growled.
"Maybe so." Vince said calmly. But we can't do nothing to change what's past now, can we." he said flatly.
I shook my head in disgust, knowing what he said was true.
"Right. So get your crazy ass together, and come on back to the hospital with me now." he ordered. I glared at him, but Vince held my stare steadily and waited patiently. After a minute or two I realized I couldn't stare him down. I finally gave in and let out a rueful laugh. "You are a very intimidating dude, Dawg!" I joked with him.
Vince grabbed me, gave me a rough hug and released me.
"Yeah. Well, sometimes this 'ol' coyote' has more sense than you realize." Vince said, with a toothy grin. "You just be remembering that, brother."
He slapped me on the back in encouragement and we turned and began our walk back to the hospital.