Chapter Thirteen:
I tightened the last knot that bound Cassie to the chair. She hadn't given us any trouble whatsoever on the way up to the shack.
"You know," I said, thoughtfully, "one of these days, we should really put a nice, comfortable chair up here. I'm thinking recliner. If you have to sit around all day for three days, might as well have a recliner, right?"
"I second that," chirped Cassie, tugging on the ropes slightly. "Marco, it's a little loose by my feet."
I stooped, and reworked the knot. "Better?"
"Much. Thanks."
"Okay," said Jake. "Let's step outside for a second."
We followed him, leaving the door open so we could make sure Cassie wasn't morphing.
Jake spoke quietly enough that Cassie couldn't hear him. "Obviously, we need to keep Cassie under observation twenty-four-seven."
"Twenty-four-three," I corrected.
"Whatever. Ax, you get the night watch. Sunrise to sunset."
"And that's when Ax began his journey towards being a vampire," I intoned. "When Jake forced him to become a creature of night!"
What is a vampire? inquired Ax.
Depends on whether you're watching Buffy or Dracula, Tobias said.
Ah, yes. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I have seen it on the television, but I do not understand it.
"That makes six of us," I said.
"Hey, I understand Buffy!" Rachel claimed.
"People! A little focus here!" exclaimed Jake. We looked at him. "As I was saying," he continued wearily, "Ax will have the night watch."
"The graveyard shift," I mumbled. Rachel sniggered. Jake glared at me.
"Tobias," he said, "will have the morning. I'll take the first half of the afternoon."
"How do you define 'first half'?" I asked suspiciously.
"Say, twelve to four," he said casually.
"I knew it!" I exclaimed. "You're skipping Algebra! That's not fair!"
"Call it leader's prerogative," he smirked. "Rachel can have the short shift, from four to six. Marco gets to skip Driver's Ed. Then we start over again at Ax."
"Hold on," Rachel said. "If anybody needs Driver's Ed, it's Marco. Jake, you've seen him drive, how can you suggest such a thing?"
"Hey!"
Jake winced. "Ouch. That's right, I'd forgotten."
How can you forget a thing like that? Tobias snorted.
"Doesn't trauma tend to harm the memory? Like, people forget terrifying events because their brain just doesn't want to think about them?" Rachel asked.
"Hey!" I repeated. "If that's true, then . . . where am I? Who are you people? Why am I dressed like a tasteless biker?"
"You are tasteless," Rachel informed me sweetly.
But not a biker. There's no way you're that athletic, said Tobias.
"Back to assigning shifts," I suggested. "Jake, what fascinating thing were you saying before these cruel and heartless people decided to torture me with their acid wit?"
"I could take the Driver's Ed shift," Rachel suggested.
"Oh?" I inquired icily. "The mighty warrior-princess doesn't need the training of mere mortals to learn how to drive the big, heavy machines?"
"No," she replied. "She doesn't. The mighty warrior-princess learned how to drive at her aunt's last summer. The mighty warrior-princess has been bored silly this whole class hearing the merely mortal teacher drone on about things she already knows."
Rachel had taken a trip the past summer for a couple weeks. Fortunately, the irony gods had smiled down upon us and the Yeerks had been quiet. One of the very few lucky breaks we've had since this whole war began.
"Which aunt was that?" Jake asked curiously.
"Jane."
"Oh, the other side of the family."
"Right."
If we're finished reviewing the family tree, Tobias grunted, some of us have sleep to catch up on.
I believe we should return to the issue at hand, Ax assented.
Jake frowned, making a snap decision. "Okay," he said. "Rachel has the evenings. Marco has the late afternoons. Tobias, that means your watch begins now."
Tobias made a short, sharp noise from his branch.
Prince Jake, Ax said, before Tobias had a chance to say anything rude, Tobias is quite tired. I will be happy to take his watch for today.
I could tell Tobias was struggling between pride and exhaustion. This time, exhaustion won out. Thanks, Ax-man.
"And that brings us to the last item of business," said Jake. "If any of us can overlap or spend extra time up here, we should. The more eyes on Cassie, the better. I want this to be a perfectly uneventful three days."
I winced. "Why did you have to say that?" I demanded. "Now you've gone and jinxed us."
I tightened the last knot that bound Cassie to the chair. She hadn't given us any trouble whatsoever on the way up to the shack.
"You know," I said, thoughtfully, "one of these days, we should really put a nice, comfortable chair up here. I'm thinking recliner. If you have to sit around all day for three days, might as well have a recliner, right?"
"I second that," chirped Cassie, tugging on the ropes slightly. "Marco, it's a little loose by my feet."
I stooped, and reworked the knot. "Better?"
"Much. Thanks."
"Okay," said Jake. "Let's step outside for a second."
We followed him, leaving the door open so we could make sure Cassie wasn't morphing.
Jake spoke quietly enough that Cassie couldn't hear him. "Obviously, we need to keep Cassie under observation twenty-four-seven."
"Twenty-four-three," I corrected.
"Whatever. Ax, you get the night watch. Sunrise to sunset."
"And that's when Ax began his journey towards being a vampire," I intoned. "When Jake forced him to become a creature of night!"
What is a vampire? inquired Ax.
Depends on whether you're watching Buffy or Dracula, Tobias said.
Ah, yes. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I have seen it on the television, but I do not understand it.
"That makes six of us," I said.
"Hey, I understand Buffy!" Rachel claimed.
"People! A little focus here!" exclaimed Jake. We looked at him. "As I was saying," he continued wearily, "Ax will have the night watch."
"The graveyard shift," I mumbled. Rachel sniggered. Jake glared at me.
"Tobias," he said, "will have the morning. I'll take the first half of the afternoon."
"How do you define 'first half'?" I asked suspiciously.
"Say, twelve to four," he said casually.
"I knew it!" I exclaimed. "You're skipping Algebra! That's not fair!"
"Call it leader's prerogative," he smirked. "Rachel can have the short shift, from four to six. Marco gets to skip Driver's Ed. Then we start over again at Ax."
"Hold on," Rachel said. "If anybody needs Driver's Ed, it's Marco. Jake, you've seen him drive, how can you suggest such a thing?"
"Hey!"
Jake winced. "Ouch. That's right, I'd forgotten."
How can you forget a thing like that? Tobias snorted.
"Doesn't trauma tend to harm the memory? Like, people forget terrifying events because their brain just doesn't want to think about them?" Rachel asked.
"Hey!" I repeated. "If that's true, then . . . where am I? Who are you people? Why am I dressed like a tasteless biker?"
"You are tasteless," Rachel informed me sweetly.
But not a biker. There's no way you're that athletic, said Tobias.
"Back to assigning shifts," I suggested. "Jake, what fascinating thing were you saying before these cruel and heartless people decided to torture me with their acid wit?"
"I could take the Driver's Ed shift," Rachel suggested.
"Oh?" I inquired icily. "The mighty warrior-princess doesn't need the training of mere mortals to learn how to drive the big, heavy machines?"
"No," she replied. "She doesn't. The mighty warrior-princess learned how to drive at her aunt's last summer. The mighty warrior-princess has been bored silly this whole class hearing the merely mortal teacher drone on about things she already knows."
Rachel had taken a trip the past summer for a couple weeks. Fortunately, the irony gods had smiled down upon us and the Yeerks had been quiet. One of the very few lucky breaks we've had since this whole war began.
"Which aunt was that?" Jake asked curiously.
"Jane."
"Oh, the other side of the family."
"Right."
If we're finished reviewing the family tree, Tobias grunted, some of us have sleep to catch up on.
I believe we should return to the issue at hand, Ax assented.
Jake frowned, making a snap decision. "Okay," he said. "Rachel has the evenings. Marco has the late afternoons. Tobias, that means your watch begins now."
Tobias made a short, sharp noise from his branch.
Prince Jake, Ax said, before Tobias had a chance to say anything rude, Tobias is quite tired. I will be happy to take his watch for today.
I could tell Tobias was struggling between pride and exhaustion. This time, exhaustion won out. Thanks, Ax-man.
"And that brings us to the last item of business," said Jake. "If any of us can overlap or spend extra time up here, we should. The more eyes on Cassie, the better. I want this to be a perfectly uneventful three days."
I winced. "Why did you have to say that?" I demanded. "Now you've gone and jinxed us."