Lost

Portalkeeper87

11-Angel on the Treetop

"So what should we do with him?" I asked excitedly. "What should we do?"

"A routine torture and dust?" Spike suggested, lighting another cigarette.

"Can you not smoke? I mean, what type of person starts doing drugs after he's dead? Like it's not pathetic enough either way."

He rolled his eyes. Blue eyes. And Dru had brown ones. Why was that, when all the other vampires constantly displayed ridges and fangs?

"Why aren't you all…bumpy? Both of you. Why do you look human and not like reject Klingons with shaved off eyebrows? I mean, that's what all the other vampires on this wacked-out show look like."

Spike sighed, dropping his half-finished cigarette on the ground and stomping it. Not like he had to. The muck in the sewers put the flame out already.

"Only the ones with a role to play gets to show their faces," Dru said dreamily, trailing a pale finger along Angel's face. "Minor actors are simply not important enough to be show true recognition."

"Yeah, uh-huh. That's right, ducks. Whatever you say." Spike brushed it off like it had been another one of Drusilla's nutty rants. But that wasn't exactly true, was it? What she said made perfect sense…in my world. If BtVS was a show.

"Dru? What did you say again?" I asked suspiciously.

By this time she had let go of Angel. Looking quite confused, I might mention.

"Why…oh, oh, oh!" she exclaimed excitedly. "I know, I know! It was my Angel, he's the one that put the pretty pictures in my head!" She grabbed him again, this time in a tight embrace. Unfortunately, the stupid poof chose this moment to wake up. Feeling him stir in her arms, Dru shoved him away and stood up, wiping her hands on his smelly shirt.

"Oof…whaa?" he mumbled, hands shooting up to feel his hair. Relieved that it was still sticking straight up, Angel regarded the scenario with suspicion.

"He's the one, the key—" Dru began to exclaim.

"Uh, sorry to interrupt," I said uncertainly. "But I thought the Key was Dawn?" Spike me a patented confused look. "You know, your Nibblet? Buffy's klepto little sis? Oh right, she's still somewhere on the other side of the world right now. Never mind. Do continue."

"… To you going home, little Alexis," Dru continued, like she'd never been interrupted. "Only thing is, where is the lock?"

I grinned, an evil idea blossoming in my twisted little mind.

"What are you doing to me? What do you want?" Angel demanded, getting up and in Spike's face.

"Bugger off," the blond vampire snapped. He tried to push an irate Angel away, but the doofus was simply too chunky and dense.

"Here, let me help," I said sweetly. I grabbed Angel by his hair and slammed him against the slimy, smelly wall, making sure to mash his hair in the gunk.

Feeling his head, the big baby began to cry. Hehehe…

"You know, I've seen a couple of episodes of Season 5. See, there's this girl…" I trailed off, uncertain what I should admit. That Spike was so into the Slayer that he ordered a sex-bot and got pummeled by a Hell-god? Not a good thing to say, with his present girlfriend…well, present. "Anyway, since I'm from another dimension and Angel can get me home, he'd be opening dimensional doors, right? Which would only happen if he was bled dry. But that would merge all dimensions together, and none of us wants that, exactly. So I think I have an idea…"

Dru broke into a laugh, this time definitely of the insane variety. "Oh, I see what you are up to, little imp." She waggled a finger at me. "Evil, mischievous little girl."

TBC

A/N: SO sorry for the long time between updates. Really busy at school and all, not to mention catching up on years of Buffy seasons. I've seen all of 1-5 and what's out for S7 so far. Still waiting for S6 to re-run. The next chapter will most likely be the last. Sorry again, but I can't continue this forever. And I have no idea when the next chapter will be up. Whenever I've got ideas, I guess.