A/N: Again, thank you for the reviews! Oh, and to clear it up, yes, the ****** meant the flashback was over. Sorry about the confusion. Oh, and about the word parsimonious - yeah, I caught that after I uploaded, I meant to type something else!

Disclaimer: I do not own anything. :( But Matthew Perry is a cutie... I wouldn't mind owning him!

CHAPTER SIX - Cruel

"Chandler..." Monica said, her voice shaking. "Please, please tell me you're kidding. And if you're kidding, I'll kill you, because that is just cruel. No, that is beyond cruel, that is... inhuman!"

"I'm not kidding," Chandler said sadly. "She's in the hospital. They - they found a suicide note."

"Oh my God," Monica said faintly. "Oh my God. I think I'm going to pass out. Please hold while I pass out."

"Monica - "

"No, I'm going to throw up. Oh my God, Chandler, why? Why? Is she okay? Is it my fault?" Monica sounded beyond despairing.

"She's still unconscious," Chandler explained gently. "And no, it's not your fault. She said that in the note. She doesn't want you to feel bad. She said that. It's not your fault. She thought she fucked up her life and she said she just didn't see the point of living anymore."

The only sound was of Monica's sobs. "I w-w-was so angry, but she's my f-f-friend and I still l-l-love her. If she d-dies, I won't be able to, to live with myself."

"I know, sweetie. But we just have to pray for her," Chandler whispered. It was quiet. "Monica, do you want to come down here?"

"I don't know," Monica said. "It - I don't know if I can see her."

"But do you maybe want to come to..." Chandler hated to say the next few words, but he knew he had to. "To say good-bye?"

"Maybe," Monica said. "I guess so." She took a deep breath, then blew it out. "Okay. All right. I'm coming tomorrow morning. But I'm going to your place first. I can't just show up at the hospital and see everyone."

They said good-bye, and Chandler, despite his racing mind, fell instantly asleep.

The next morning, when Chandler woke up, Joey still had not come home. Ross and Rachel came by and asked if he wanted to get a ride with them to the hospital.

"I have to do something here," he explained. An hour later, there was a knock at his door.

"Hey," Monica said.

"Hi," Chandler said, hugging her again. It had been only one day since he'd seen her, but he needed to hold her in his arms again. "You ready to go?"

They took a cab to the hospital. Partway through the ride, Monica unbuckled her seatbelt and slid over to nestle in Chandler's arms. Chandler kissed the top of her head and held her tightly.

They walked up to the third floor of the hospital, where Phoebe's room was. Monica paused outside the hallway before the lobby.

"What's the matter?" Chandler asked her.

"I haven't talked to anybody but you since..." Monica said. "It's been a month. Are they mad at me for leaving?"

Chandler hesitated. They kind of were. Ross, especially at first, thought it was cowardly of his little sister to leave because things got bad, but they'd all forgotten it. "No. They're not."

Monica nodded resolutely and followed Chandler to Phoebe's room. Chandler poked his head inside first. Joey was still at his vigil next to Phoebe's bed, and Ross and Rachel were leaning against the wall, talking in low tones. "Guys. Come out here for a sec. It's important." The three left the room.

"Monica!" Ross cried. "What - what are you doing here?"

"Hi," Monica said, avoiding their eyes.

"Mon, where have you been?" Rachel asked, quickly hugging her friend.

"Away," Monica replied simply.

"How did you know to come here?" Joey asked.

Monica glanced at Chandler, who cleared his throat. "We've sort of, um, been talking on the phone."

Ross swiveled to give Chandler a hard look. "You've been talking to her and you didn't tell me?"

"Ross, chill out," Monica snapped. "We can talk about it later. How's Phoebe?"

"Still unconscious," Rachel said. "But the doctors said there's some brain activity, so that's a good sign. The sleeping pills just shut her down... they said it could take a while for her to come back on."

"I still can't believe she did this," Monica said, running her hands through her hair. "Phoebe? She always seemed so happy, even when times got bad! And she knew how awful it was when her mother died... didn't she know we still love her?"

"She thinks you hate her," Joey said.

"But I said - "

"She knows what you said," he interrupted. "And she knows you hate her. Come on, Mon - doesn't a little part of you hate her for what she did? Don't you hate that she willingly got in bed with your husband, that he touched her and held her and kissed her - "

"Stop," Chandler said firmly as Monica's face crumpled. "Come on, Joe. I know you're hurting, but stop."

"Maybe a little piece of me does hate her," Monica said in a voice that sounded vicious through her tears. "Maybe a little piece of me really wants to hate her forever. But that piece is really small. I didn't think I ever wanted to see Phoebe again, but if she's this sorry and she's suffering this much, I want to help her. I don't think I can ever completely forgive her - I'll grant you that. But I can move past it. Do you really think I'm that cruel, Joey? Did you think I wanted to see Phoebe hurt herself?"

"No," Joey muttered. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Monica."

"It's okay," Monica said softly. "Now let's go see Phoebe."

Monica went into the hospital room and walked straight up to Phoebe. She picked up her friend's limp hand and kissed it softly. "Hey, Pheebs. It's Monica. Yeah, I'm here. Honey, I don't know why you did this. Did you think I hated you? I really don't. I love you. I was angry with you, and I still am, but I want you back! I want you to be here with me again, I want you to play your guitar, and say random things to make us all laugh... God, you make me laugh so much. I know things have changed because of what happened. I know it can never go back to being totally normal, but things can be good again. It'll take some time and effort, and tears and smiles. But we can do it! We have all our best friends here to help us. I know you'd be laughing if you could see this, because the guys are all crying like babies." She paused and laughed, looking back at the others, who were in fact crying. "I really need you to wake up. We all do. And think about Frank and Alice, and the triplets... they all love you too. I just want you to know that we're all here for you. You must have been so troubled to do this! But don't worry. We'll be here for you forever." She set Phoebe's hand gently back on the sheet and turned away, waiting until now to sob. She went straight to Chandler's open arms.

Later, as they all sat in uncomfortable hospital chairs, Ross, Rachel, and Joey grilled Monica.

"Where were you staying?" Ross asked.

"Upstate."

"Are you coming home?" Rachel asked.

Monica pondered this. "I think I am.''

Chandler fell asleep, and when her awoke, everyone was gone. There was a note taped to his hand that said Ross, Rachel, and Joey had gone home to sleep and shower, but Monica was no where to be found. Cautiously, Chandler got up and went inside Phoebe's room.

Monica had pulled a chair up and was sitting next to Phoebe with her back to Chandler. He could just barely make out what she was saying.

"Remember when Joey got his head stuck in the turkey? And you put him on the table and pretended his body wasn't there? Oh, and remember when the underdog balloon got away? So many funny things have happened to us. I want to have a lifetime more." Monica continued to tell Phoebe about their life. Chandler leaned against the doorway and smiled. God, Monica cares for her so much, he thought. She ruined Monica's life and still, Monica loves her. That was one of the things Chandler loved about Monica - her willingness to come to everyone's rescue despite anything else. That and about a billion other things.

He forgot he was supposed to be quiet and coughed. Monica started and turned around. "How long have you been here?" she demanded.

"Long enough," Chandler said. He went up and started rubbing Monica's shoulder. "How ya doing?"

"Okay," Monica said, shrugging. "God, I hope she wakes up. I won't be able to live with myself to know I took away someone's sister, three little people's aunts... I just won't."

"She's not going to die," Chandler said steadfastly.

"How do you know?" Monica inquired, standing up and facing him so their faces were inches apart. "How can you be sure?''

"Well, I'm not sure," Chandler amended. "But Phoebe's a survivor. She survived her father leaving and her mother dying, she survived living on the street - hell, she survived living with you," he joked. Monica swatted him. "If someone can live with you they can live through anything."

"Chandler, I want you to tell me the truth about something," Monica said suddenly, changing the path of the conversation. "I know you lied before. I could hear it in your voice. Do you think I don't know it when you're lying? So this time, promise me you won't lie."

"I won't lie," Chandler pledged.

"Does Richard really regret what happened? Do you think he wishes things were how they used to be?" There was something in Monica's eyes Chandler couldn't quite pinpoint? Hope? Anger?

Chandler sighed. He didn't want to be the one to tell her. He didn't want to have to be the one to cause her so much pain. But she asked, and he had to tell her.

"I don't think so, Mon," he said. "I think he wanted out, and he saw Phoebe as a way. I know he really did love you, but he changed after the baby. He didn't deserve you. He - he already moved out. Your apartment's been empty for two weeks. I'm sorry, Mon."

Monica was at a loss for several seconds. Then she nodded. "Okay."

"Are you okay?" Chandler asked worriedly.

"I will be," she said. "I'm not going to cry over him anymore. You're right. I deserve better."

"Damn right," Chandler said, feeling slightly triumphant. "You deserve someone who will always love you and respect you, Monica."

"Chandler, will you do something for me?" Monica asked.

"What?" Chandler asked.

"Will you kiss me again?"

Chandler stared at Monica. Is this a joke? he wondered. He watched her closely for any signs of a teasing smile, but saw none. Here's your chance, he thought. Here's your chance to kiss her. Here's your chance to tell her how you feel.

During the long pause, Monica turned red. "Y'know - forget it. That was really stupid. I was just - "

Chandler cut her off - with his lips. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her, and she kissed him back.

"Wow! How long have I been asleep?" a groggy voice asked.

Chandler and Monica broke apart, beyond startled. Chandler's heart all but stopped beating as he and Monica turned to the bed.

Phoebe was awake. Her eyes were wide open and she was smiling at the two of them.

"Oh my God, Pheebs," Monica said, tears filling her eyes.

"Monica - I could hear you," Phoebe said, becoming serious. "I could hear you talking, but it was like I was in a dream. Do you really, truly forgive me?"

"Not entirely," Monica said with a grin. "But we can work on it."

A/N: Review please! Thanks :) -Jen