"Boredness makes you do stupid things."

                                               --Selena Night

CHAPTER 1:

THE MEETING:

"Welcome people!" Greeted the now 16 year-old Harry Potter. "We are all gathered here for one reason, and one reason only: Our friend, Hermione Granger, has discovered the meaning of life!" He said, as Hermione stepped out through a door in the back of the stage. She walked up to Harry and took the microphone.

"Yes, it's true," She modestly said, "I have discovered the meaning of life." A hand popped up in the crowd. "Yes?"

"The meaning of life is 42!" Yelled Christine Potter. A girl with short curly hair and oval shaped glasses, with short bangs that were only a small tip. Another hand rose up. (No relation to Harry)

"No dear, ah, yes sir?" Asked Hermione, gesturing to the 2nd hand to go up.

"Is it safe to reveal this kind of information to the public?" Came a familiar voice from the spot where the hand had been raised.

"Oh shut up, Ron, you over grown Cheez-It!  The meaning of life is chocolate, everybody knows that." (A/n: That second sentence it a line from Kat Burnell! Special thanks to her, whom without, this wouldn't be possible!) The figure that was Ron, gloomily got up, face a crimson red, and walked out of the room slightly crying. Harry snatched the mic from Hermione and said into it, "Well, I gotta go now! My monkey calls!" He walked to the tip of the stage, flapped his arms, and then jumped off. He fell flat on his face on the floor.  Silence.

"Look! He's a birdy!" Yelled a small boy from the audience. The group applauded. Just then, Harry got up again with a dazed smile on his face as he shot straight out of the ceiling and landed who knows where.

"Oh, Harry! What have I told you about taking off inside?! It costs a lot to pay to fix that!" Scolded Hermione.

"Sorry Mimi!" Came Harry's yelling voice from the hold in the ceiling.

"It still doesn't help!"

"What if I helped pay?!"

"Mmm… ok." Pencil shavings started to pour from the hole. When all of it was on the floor, Hermione went and stood under the opening before shouting, "Thanks, Harry! That should cover it!" At this, mothers started gathering their children and pulling them away from the room, while fathers just sat and glared waiting to see what happened next.

"Hah! Look! Potter's farting!" Yelled the voice of Draco Malfoy from the front. Everyone glared, for no one smelled anything. Hermione suddenly put on a seductive smile, walked over to him, and put her pointing finger to his chin.

"Ya know, you're pretty cute for a Slytherin." She said, glaring into his eyes. He gave a blank look, stupidly smiled, and blushed.

"Heh.. thanks." He tried to look away but just couldn't and put a hand through her curly hair.

"I say we make out."

"Sure!" She grabbed the collar of his robes and pulled him into a nearby closet before locking the door. The fathers and batchler glared thinking, "Boy, he's gonna get some…", while the women that were left snorted disapprovingly, and the only 2 children just stared puzzled.

"Does this mean I'm gonna be an aunty?" Popped Christine's voice from the back, as she glared.

"Maybe, hun!" Said a voice next to her. The voice of Katy Riddle, from next to her. A tall, pale. Blonde haired, green eyes girl, with her hair back in a pony tale and her bangs shining.

"Oh! Don't discourage her!" Scorned Professor McGonagall from Christine's right side. She put a hand over her shoulder and muttered, "Don't worry, hunny, I'm sure you'll be an aunty!"

"Thanks Professor…" Whimpered Christine.

"Professor! How could you expect something like this from Hermione?!"

"Oh, you know she doesn't protect herself." Katy blushed at that and went silent. A few moments later the sound of the word "Meep" could be heard from somewhere and suddenly, Harry fell through the ceiling to Katy's left.

"Hi Harry? You ok?" She asked. Harry just flopped around on the floor like a fish.

"Harry! Look what you're doing!" Yelled McGonagall. "You're moving your flippers all wrong! Here, let me show you how to do it the right way." She got on the floor, and flopped around with him. He made a mouth gesture to the Professor that Katy took as a thank you. Katy rolled her eyes.

"You both obviously don't know the importance of which animal to adore. Fish are smelly and stupid. Bunny's are the new millennium." She got on the floor and hoped out of the room just as Kat walked in. A short girl, with messy brown hair usually swept into a tight bun at the back of her head. Brown freckles dotted her cheeks and the bridge of her nose and a pair of oval glasses rested on her nose.

"Oh darn! I was hoping to find Hermione here!" She pouted.

"Oh, she's here!" Said Parvati Patil, motioning her head to the door. Kat's eyes widened.

"I-I see… Ok. I guess it can wait… Say, why can Ron out in the hall looking unstable?"

"Hermione called him an over grown Cheez-It."

"Uh! Better get the rattle!" She went to a chest of drawers on the stage, and took out a blue baby rattle which she shook, muttering, "Come' ere, Ron! I've got the tweedle twiddle! Come on now! I'll let you drive the stroller!" Slowly, Ron came into the room, his cheeks tear stained, nibbling his right thumb.

"Promise?"

"Yes, dear. Now take your filthy baby toy." His face lightened up as he pounced the rattle, which Kat had thrown on the floor.

"So, who's it this time? Seamus? Neville?"

"Draco." Replied Parvati.

"Oooohhh! Hermione said 'They say he knows how to do the delicate art of making out.', which made me laugh for hours."

"And why is that?" She snapped.

"Well… because sex isn't an art."

"What is it then?" Ron was now sleeping on the floor, Christine playing with the rattle that she had stolen from him.

"How should I know?" She stormed out of the room before saying, "Nice swimming, Harry, you too, Professor."