"You see things as they are and ask, 'Why?'
I dream of things that never were and ask 'Why not?'"

                                                                   --John F. Kennedy
                                                                            

CHAPTER 2:

THE POWER OF CHEESE

Hermione was coming back from the girls bathroom looking an awful pale. She was getting back into bed when Katy asked, "Hermione? What are you doing up so early?" Asked Katy from across Hermione's bed.

"Umm… Getting coffee."

 "Oh...ok," Katy nodded, and her head fell back onto her pillow. Hermione sighed in relief. Adele sat up suddenly, and held up a finger, "The square route of 64 is 8." Which shocked Hermione so much, her heart momentarily stopped, she blinked after a minute of so and said, "Um...yeah." Adele smiled, and fell back to her pillow.

"Hermione?" she whirled around to find Christine looking at her quizzically...or what would be quizzically if her eyes weren't still shut.

 "Yes?" she asked hesitantly. "How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?" 

"4! Now shut up!"

"Hermione!"

"What now?!" she turned to find Kat sitting up in bed.

"I figured it out!"

"What did you figure out?" she asked in a monotone voice.

 "I-I-I...like cheese," she smiled, and nodded, before falling sideways. Hermione blinked once more, since Kat didn't like cheese.

Hermione was pulling back her covers when the door slammed open with Harry and Ron yelling, "WAKE UP!"

"Shut up!" Kat yelled, as they all buried their heads in their pillows. Ron whimpered and ran back to him dormitory crying. Harry stood there a few more moments, nibbling a cookie, looking as if he were thinking, before shutting the door and going off, who knows where. Hermione stayed up a bit longer, still in unease, but eventually fell into a soft, worried, sleep. (A/n: From the beginning of the story, to right here, is Kat's contribution. Thank you again, Kat.)

Harry was in the Gryffindor common room, on the floor, playing with his legos and glaring at Hermione. She was reading            g an issue of "Teen" magazine and even though the closet incident with Draco had been 3 days ago, she still had that satisfied glow, but a pale glow due to a shock from last night.. Apparently Malfoy had lived up to the rumors.

"Meep! Meep!" Harry blurted. Hermione put a hand in a bowl on the table next to her chair, without looking away from the magazine, and threw Harry a piece of candy from it. Right on his forehead it fell.

"Ahhh! My scar hurts! Voldemort's near!"

"It's the candy, you retard." Kat was across the room and had heard the conversation. She stood up and walked over to them, where she stood, her arms crossed across her chest.

"Hmm… Well that was light. Normally you would've kicked him out already." She said.

"Well, I'm in a good mood." Came Hermione's smug reply.

"So it's true. You really did get some from Draco." Hermione's head was now wobbling. "You ok?"

"Uhh… no. I feel a bit dizzy… Stomach hurts…"

"Better go to the Hospital Wing."

"Mhhh… Nah. I think I'll just go to lunch."

"If you say so."

"I'm the Harry Potter and I'm a wizard!" Harry blurted as he ran into the chimney. He fell back, his lip trembling a bit."

"Oh, Harry," Muttered Kat as she sat him in a chair. "You're bleeding." Hermione walked over and as soon as she saw the flow of blood going down Harry's face, a burst of nausea came out in her stomach and mouth. This time her entire body wobbled and she passed out and fell. Kat ran over to her and half an hour later Hermione woke up to see Katy's face hanging over her. She could see Kat just behind her, tending to Harry's forehead.

"Kat! I wanna go to lunch now!"

"Oh, hush up you baby! Let me finish up here!"

"Fine! You're mean…" The bell then rang meaning only one thing: Lunch was over. "NOOOO!!!" Harry shouted in dismay. "I've missed lunch!" He got up and pushed Kat to the floor before sitting back down to whimper. Christine then came down the stairs looking sleepy.

"What did I miss?" She asked before yawning at the foot of the stairs. Harry broke down again and whimpered, "Lunch…"

"Oh my god! No!! What are we going to do?!"

"I want cheese."

"Uh! I have an idea! The cheese rainbow!"

"Where is it?!" Demanded Harry, while looking around madly.

"Well if it isn't the sugar off the coffee of stupidity." Said Hermione, looking annoyed by Christine.

"Harry, if you were any slower you'd be going backwards." Declared Kat.

"Huh?" He asked.

"Oh, never mind you-" She stopped, seeing that his lip was trembling and instead said, "adorable little wizard, you…" His face lightened up a bit with a childish smile. Hermione just glared at her angrily and she just shrugged back with a weak smile. Christine had taken out a map from somewhere and laid it out on a table.

"The cheese rainbow is…Over the lake. Comes out when you drop a cheese crumb into the lake." Someone then appeared from within the chimney in a cloud of soot. Monica Abella. A tall girl with medium-long brown hair and light brown skin, brushing soot off of her. Another blast of the black soot smoke and another girl was then behind Monica. Adele Corrigan. A medium heighted girl, with fair pale skin and curly light blonde hair and light green eyes.

"We want to come along to the cheese rainbow." She proudly said. Christine looked at them suspiciously.

"Me wants cheese." Said Monica, dreamily.

"You can come…" Replied Christine, still a slight bit suspicious. Hermione had been containing her anger a bit and now she unleashed it by yelling, "Adele! Monica! Look how dirty everything is! We'll get in trouble!" Everyone went silent for a while. A few minutes later, Christine grabbed Harry's arm and pulled him out of the room. Hermione, once again, just glared annoyedly. They came back after only 20 minutes or so, wands held out as they yelled, "Sneachta!" A flash of white and all the soot was suddenly a white powder of snow. Adele's face instantly filled with glee as she got down and started making snow angels.

"Mehr…" She muttered.

"I wanna go to da cheese rainbow now!" Pouted Harry.

"We'll get the crumbs." Offered Monica, picking up Adele and leading her out of the common room and down to the kitchens. Meanwhile, Harry and Christine went down to the lake to wait, leaving Kat and Hermione to talk.

"What's with the pale? New look?" Started Kat, now sitting in the armchair across from Hermione.

"No…" She replied, trying to keep the guilt out of her voice.

"Then what do you have to be pale about?"

"How stupid they all are. It's embarrassing." Ron was coming down the stairs now, rubbing his eyes. "Look! We have another celebrity! The cherry off the sundae of shame!" She smirked evilly at Kat's annoyed face and went off to the lake herself. Kat stayed and tried to calm down the now crying Ron.

Hermione lay under the shade of a tree, still reading her magazine. After only half an hour Monica and Adele came back with a chunk of cheddar cheese. Harry had gotten half and given it to the birds, which made Adele bonk him on the back of the head, making Ron break down into a corner. So Kat was once again trying to calm him down with the "tweedle twiddle". Christine had the other block and was trying to squish it by hitting it with her wand, Katy was trying to make her use her hands instead. Eventually she did and through a few crumbs into the lake. The ground shook, birds blew away, a mist of orange appeared over the lake and cleared, leaving a rainbow of cheeses. Cheddar, philadelphia, Monte re jack, mozzarella, parmesan, swiss, and Colby, all lined up that way, forming the mystical cheese rainbow. Harry and the others, except for Hermione and Kat, just looked at it as if it were the most beautiful thing ever. A small bit or orange mist was still hanging at the very top. Hermione rolled her eyes and muttered under her breath, "And now the ice on the drink of immaturity. A cheese rainbow…"

Katy was the first to come out of shock, so she started climbing the rainbow followed by Harry, Ron, Christine, Adele, and finally, Monica. Harry was the first to reach the top, since everyone else couldn't control themselves and stopped every few minutes to eat cheese. Harry could now smell the mist and noticed that it had a cheddar like scent. So he started snapping at it as Katy reached the top.

"Harry! You'll break your teeth like that!" He took no notice and kept snapping the air.

"Stop, my cheese desiring children!" Came the voice of a tall women, deep within the sheet of mist.

"Mommy! A-and, Katy, you're my sister! Yay!"

"Pathe-" She saw Harry's face and just said, "No, I'm sorry, I'm not your sister and that isn't your mum."

"Well… who is it then?"

"T'is I! The Cheese Queen!" The queen came out. A young lady, with black hair and eyes, with a crown of what Katy identified as mozzarella and a dress and short of thin cheddar cheese. Her hair reminded Katy of Adele's only black, her ears bared two small rectangles of Monte Re Jack cheese as earrings. "I am Manda, Queen of Cheese."

"Oh my god! Hello, your highness!" Said Harry, while bowing, "I am honored to meet you."

"S'not mutual… Anyway, welcome, my cheese eating child!"

"Does that make me the prince of cheese?"

"Uh, Harry! It's just a royal expression! You have no relation to her!" Interrupted Katy. The other were now arriving, all with a piece of cheese in their hand.

"Who's this?" Started Monica.

"This is the cheese queen! Bow to her now, Blake!" Shouted Harry, at Monica. Each of them bowed with the utmost respect as the queen summoned her cheese fairies. They opened a gate behind the queen. Their jaws dropped. It was the mythical land of cheese.

A/n: This fan fiction is brought to you by cheese, in all its goodness.

A/n: I know this wasn't as funny as the last chapter, but don't let that discourage you from reading the chapters to come! They WILL all be much funnier then this. If you have any suggestions or ideas please e-mail me at clow@email.com.

Special Thanks To: Kathryn Reid, Kat Burnell and Amanda, for all their help in giving he the idea on an adventure we had. Kat, for giving me one of her not used scenes, to use in this chapter.