Chapter three
"Heero, what the hell?" Duo was desperately fighting the urge to laugh or cry or shout, anything to break the silence.
"I didn't know it at the time. It was just, she's so good at lying. I didn't know what I was doing at the time. I swear it!" he let out a sigh and rubbed his forehead with his hands. "It's just, she looked so helpless. I fucked up didn't I?" he looked to the man at his side for confirmation.
Duo laughed, but it was a weak sounding thing, and it died on his lips. "Ok, let me get this straight. You let Ronan talk to LJ. Then you invited Ronan to the twin's party. Then, on top of that, you didn't tell me. Yeah, I'd say you'd fucked up real bad."
"But I didn't-" started Heero indignantly.
"Shut the hell up. You let a witch who has a vendetta against me invite her second to my children's birthday party. Do you realise that the only reason she isn't magic any more is because Ronan was away?" duo lowered his head until it was supported by the steering wheel.
"Sorry?" Heero made it a question.
"No, Heero, you're not sorry. You never are. Fuck man, if you could just look after yourself, then maybe we'd trust you more. Since the war ended, you've really taken it badly. You've been reduced to a wreck. You're nothing like the Heero we used to know. You used to be the tough man, the dude with a 'tude. Now, now you're just the drunk friend who can't look after himself." Duo sounded so sickened and angry that Heero was almost scared of his former gentle lover. Almost.
"Well I'm so fucking sorry if seeing someone take a bullet for the almighty shinigami and him not being able to save her kinda ruined my faith in the system." Said with a hint of coldness and uncaring, it sounded like something the 16-year-old Heero would say. Duo was instantly pinning Heero up against the window of the car, his face going red with feeling, not anger.
"I told you not to fucking mention her ever again. I'm trying to put that behind me. I didn't even know lily, and it was the biggest loss I ever went through. Fuck man! I didn't see you doing anything. Where were you when she died huh? What were you doing to help her? She was the only woman I'll ever love and she was gone before I could even know her."
"I thought you told LJ this morning that you loved Ana?"
"It's a different kind of love. And what are you listening to my private conversations for?" He sighed and let go of Heero. The other man slowly slid back down into his seat and massaged his red neck.
"Some conversation. But what can you do to bring her back? She's gone man. Get over it."
"How the fuck can you get over true love? It's not something you can switch off. It's permanent." A solitary tear slid out of one eye. "And there are ways of bringing her back." He said the last part so silently that Heero almost didn't hear. But he did. Narrowing his eyes suspiciously,
"Look man, you're not going all voodoo on me are you?"
"The term is necromancy, and no, I'm not raising lily back to life, but I am remaking her."
"Listen man, I know the taycer are strong, and stronger since you've been leading them, but they're not that strong. Don't pull this shit on me."
"Why do you think Anastasia looks so much like lily? Not like me, not like her mother. Like Her. Her natural hair colour was honey blonde, did you know that? And her eyes were emerald green. So beautiful, then the taycer recognised-"
"Cut the shit duo. I've heard this story before. Now what the hell did you mean about Anastasia? If you've pulled some voodoo crap and given your daughter lily's soul, that's sick. That's so fucking sick. Tell me what the hell you've done." Duo's eyes flashed with anger and he glared at Heero. He put the key into the ignition of the jaguar and started to back out of the parking lot.
"You're really one to talk aren't you Heero? I thought you loved me? Thought we were meant to be together? Hmmm, and then just five minutes with my soul mate and you cant stand to touch me again. It's a good thing that Quatre never heard about that, he would've been ma-ad at Trowa." He looked out of the back window and swore loudly as a woman in a ford pulled out in front of them, almost side-swiping the car.
"We're not talking about the thousands of mistakes I've made, we're talking about you, doing unnatural shit with lily's soul."
"The taycer didn't want to let her go. They said that she would rise again and become my queen. But they needed a vessel. So I gave them one."
"Fuck dude! That's your fucking daughter! How can you even think, even justify that?" Heero stared incredulously at Duo, who was still waiting for the woman to carry on driving.
"She's not my daughter, she's a vessel." Duo insisted adamantly.
"Do I need to explain the process man? Man + woman = baby = daughter of man + woman. Is that simple enough for you, or do I need to go further?"
"She wasn't born because I made love with Ana. The taycer conceived her and put her inside Ana. I didn't touch my wife until after the wedding. Did you ever think I did? She had this whole strict "honeymoon" policy. Then, when the twins came two months early, she just assumed they were early. She went to four finishing schools, but the woman hardly knows the facts of life. She never knew the difference."
"And what exactly are you going to do? Divorce your wife so you can be a king with the person the law sees as your daughter? It's not gonna fucking work." Heero punched the dashboard in frustration.
"I'm not gonna fuck her, I'm just gonna allow her to be my queen. We won't be married or anything. She's just going to help me rule the taycer."
"And what do those freaks think about this? Surely after years of having only a high priestess, they're going to resent Anastasia." Heero wasn't concerned, he was just trying to find holes in the plan and make them larger.
"They're not freaks! They're just people who happen to worship me. I'm not complaining. And it was their idea in the first place. Bringing back lily that is." In exasperation Heero started to slowly bang his head down against the dashboard.
"Hey, don't do that!" Heero looked up hopefully. Was it possible duo was showing concern for him? "You'll mess up my car." Heero sighed and leaned back in his seat, gazing out the window. Since lily had died duo had become bitter towards him, convinced that death would have been better than living without his soulmate. Heero had felt too guilty about cheating on duo with her to ever be able to be his lover again. Duo had taken it hard, feeling that first his female soulmate, then his best friend and lover, had left him. For ages afterwards he had moped and sulked. Meanwhile, Trowa broke it off with Quatre, who was also very upset. But Quatre got over it eventually and carried on with his life. Wufei had asked his girlfriend to marry him, and Trowa had gone into solidarity. He had shunned company and insisted on only coming out of his house for family occasions. Duo had married Ana a year after they moved into her house, and had asked Wufei to be best man. Heero had not taken it personally, but shortly afterward turned to drink for solace. When Anastasia and Cory had been born, Ana insisted on making Heero godfather. Quatre had found a girl who he was smitten over, an old school friend of Ana's. They hit it off instantly and when he proposed she said yes instantly. They had been married for 3 years before they had their first child. Clarice was a darling thing, and the twins had been delighted with her. Despite his abandonment, Trowa had been announced godfather. This seemed to finally put Trowa's old ghosts to rest, and he returned once more to a normal life. He revealed to them his pet project, started during those years of hermitage. He had started a library of classic books, and had so far collected hundreds. When the collection became too big to fit in his house, Ana gave him a room in the mansion, and it continued there. Everyone but Heero had gotten over his or her tragedies, or so he had thought. Evidently, duo still thought a great deal about her. While duo had silently got on with his grief, Heero had turned to a life of drink, drugs and womanising. He had bought a really expensive car to impress one of his girlfriends, and then promptly crashed it, almost killing them both. He had had his license revoked, and the girl had never spoken to him again. He was still lucky though. He was as strong as he was when he was a pilot, and managed to find work on building sites. He had tried for many jobs as a bouncer at clubs, but had been rejected on account of the fact that he still looked like he did at 16, slightly like a girl, and not very strong.
"Are you getting out, or are you gonna live in my car now?" Heero was startled into awareness by duo, to find that he was in a dark room. After a moment he realised it was only the garage. He got out the car and the cool air hit him instantly, a welcome relief to the stifling heat of the car. He shut the door and followed Duo through the glass passageway that ran between the main house and the garage.
"Heero, what the hell?" Duo was desperately fighting the urge to laugh or cry or shout, anything to break the silence.
"I didn't know it at the time. It was just, she's so good at lying. I didn't know what I was doing at the time. I swear it!" he let out a sigh and rubbed his forehead with his hands. "It's just, she looked so helpless. I fucked up didn't I?" he looked to the man at his side for confirmation.
Duo laughed, but it was a weak sounding thing, and it died on his lips. "Ok, let me get this straight. You let Ronan talk to LJ. Then you invited Ronan to the twin's party. Then, on top of that, you didn't tell me. Yeah, I'd say you'd fucked up real bad."
"But I didn't-" started Heero indignantly.
"Shut the hell up. You let a witch who has a vendetta against me invite her second to my children's birthday party. Do you realise that the only reason she isn't magic any more is because Ronan was away?" duo lowered his head until it was supported by the steering wheel.
"Sorry?" Heero made it a question.
"No, Heero, you're not sorry. You never are. Fuck man, if you could just look after yourself, then maybe we'd trust you more. Since the war ended, you've really taken it badly. You've been reduced to a wreck. You're nothing like the Heero we used to know. You used to be the tough man, the dude with a 'tude. Now, now you're just the drunk friend who can't look after himself." Duo sounded so sickened and angry that Heero was almost scared of his former gentle lover. Almost.
"Well I'm so fucking sorry if seeing someone take a bullet for the almighty shinigami and him not being able to save her kinda ruined my faith in the system." Said with a hint of coldness and uncaring, it sounded like something the 16-year-old Heero would say. Duo was instantly pinning Heero up against the window of the car, his face going red with feeling, not anger.
"I told you not to fucking mention her ever again. I'm trying to put that behind me. I didn't even know lily, and it was the biggest loss I ever went through. Fuck man! I didn't see you doing anything. Where were you when she died huh? What were you doing to help her? She was the only woman I'll ever love and she was gone before I could even know her."
"I thought you told LJ this morning that you loved Ana?"
"It's a different kind of love. And what are you listening to my private conversations for?" He sighed and let go of Heero. The other man slowly slid back down into his seat and massaged his red neck.
"Some conversation. But what can you do to bring her back? She's gone man. Get over it."
"How the fuck can you get over true love? It's not something you can switch off. It's permanent." A solitary tear slid out of one eye. "And there are ways of bringing her back." He said the last part so silently that Heero almost didn't hear. But he did. Narrowing his eyes suspiciously,
"Look man, you're not going all voodoo on me are you?"
"The term is necromancy, and no, I'm not raising lily back to life, but I am remaking her."
"Listen man, I know the taycer are strong, and stronger since you've been leading them, but they're not that strong. Don't pull this shit on me."
"Why do you think Anastasia looks so much like lily? Not like me, not like her mother. Like Her. Her natural hair colour was honey blonde, did you know that? And her eyes were emerald green. So beautiful, then the taycer recognised-"
"Cut the shit duo. I've heard this story before. Now what the hell did you mean about Anastasia? If you've pulled some voodoo crap and given your daughter lily's soul, that's sick. That's so fucking sick. Tell me what the hell you've done." Duo's eyes flashed with anger and he glared at Heero. He put the key into the ignition of the jaguar and started to back out of the parking lot.
"You're really one to talk aren't you Heero? I thought you loved me? Thought we were meant to be together? Hmmm, and then just five minutes with my soul mate and you cant stand to touch me again. It's a good thing that Quatre never heard about that, he would've been ma-ad at Trowa." He looked out of the back window and swore loudly as a woman in a ford pulled out in front of them, almost side-swiping the car.
"We're not talking about the thousands of mistakes I've made, we're talking about you, doing unnatural shit with lily's soul."
"The taycer didn't want to let her go. They said that she would rise again and become my queen. But they needed a vessel. So I gave them one."
"Fuck dude! That's your fucking daughter! How can you even think, even justify that?" Heero stared incredulously at Duo, who was still waiting for the woman to carry on driving.
"She's not my daughter, she's a vessel." Duo insisted adamantly.
"Do I need to explain the process man? Man + woman = baby = daughter of man + woman. Is that simple enough for you, or do I need to go further?"
"She wasn't born because I made love with Ana. The taycer conceived her and put her inside Ana. I didn't touch my wife until after the wedding. Did you ever think I did? She had this whole strict "honeymoon" policy. Then, when the twins came two months early, she just assumed they were early. She went to four finishing schools, but the woman hardly knows the facts of life. She never knew the difference."
"And what exactly are you going to do? Divorce your wife so you can be a king with the person the law sees as your daughter? It's not gonna fucking work." Heero punched the dashboard in frustration.
"I'm not gonna fuck her, I'm just gonna allow her to be my queen. We won't be married or anything. She's just going to help me rule the taycer."
"And what do those freaks think about this? Surely after years of having only a high priestess, they're going to resent Anastasia." Heero wasn't concerned, he was just trying to find holes in the plan and make them larger.
"They're not freaks! They're just people who happen to worship me. I'm not complaining. And it was their idea in the first place. Bringing back lily that is." In exasperation Heero started to slowly bang his head down against the dashboard.
"Hey, don't do that!" Heero looked up hopefully. Was it possible duo was showing concern for him? "You'll mess up my car." Heero sighed and leaned back in his seat, gazing out the window. Since lily had died duo had become bitter towards him, convinced that death would have been better than living without his soulmate. Heero had felt too guilty about cheating on duo with her to ever be able to be his lover again. Duo had taken it hard, feeling that first his female soulmate, then his best friend and lover, had left him. For ages afterwards he had moped and sulked. Meanwhile, Trowa broke it off with Quatre, who was also very upset. But Quatre got over it eventually and carried on with his life. Wufei had asked his girlfriend to marry him, and Trowa had gone into solidarity. He had shunned company and insisted on only coming out of his house for family occasions. Duo had married Ana a year after they moved into her house, and had asked Wufei to be best man. Heero had not taken it personally, but shortly afterward turned to drink for solace. When Anastasia and Cory had been born, Ana insisted on making Heero godfather. Quatre had found a girl who he was smitten over, an old school friend of Ana's. They hit it off instantly and when he proposed she said yes instantly. They had been married for 3 years before they had their first child. Clarice was a darling thing, and the twins had been delighted with her. Despite his abandonment, Trowa had been announced godfather. This seemed to finally put Trowa's old ghosts to rest, and he returned once more to a normal life. He revealed to them his pet project, started during those years of hermitage. He had started a library of classic books, and had so far collected hundreds. When the collection became too big to fit in his house, Ana gave him a room in the mansion, and it continued there. Everyone but Heero had gotten over his or her tragedies, or so he had thought. Evidently, duo still thought a great deal about her. While duo had silently got on with his grief, Heero had turned to a life of drink, drugs and womanising. He had bought a really expensive car to impress one of his girlfriends, and then promptly crashed it, almost killing them both. He had had his license revoked, and the girl had never spoken to him again. He was still lucky though. He was as strong as he was when he was a pilot, and managed to find work on building sites. He had tried for many jobs as a bouncer at clubs, but had been rejected on account of the fact that he still looked like he did at 16, slightly like a girl, and not very strong.
"Are you getting out, or are you gonna live in my car now?" Heero was startled into awareness by duo, to find that he was in a dark room. After a moment he realised it was only the garage. He got out the car and the cool air hit him instantly, a welcome relief to the stifling heat of the car. He shut the door and followed Duo through the glass passageway that ran between the main house and the garage.