A/N: This is my friend Emily's story. I just up loaded it for her because her computer's messed up.

Weiss POV

Eric Weiss: "You love her! You know you do!"

I am so pissed off with this whole Sydney Vaughn thing. Heck, combine this "romance" with the double agent getup, and you'd have a great TV show!

Vaughn: " I know I love her. But she doesn't love me, she can't love me! And even if she did, we'd still have a little problem. P..."

I clamped my hand over Mike's mouth, keeping him from saying it.

Eric Weiss: "If you even think about saying the "p -word" I will so kill you.

Vaughn:" Ok. How about this: You trick Syd into admitting her feelings for me on camera, and then give it to me. Now how's that for a great idea?"

What, has this nut been on crack? Trick SYDNEY BRiSTOW into something that stupid?

E: " Hey! I've got a better idea! How about I also trick her into writing a love note to you and showing up at your house in nothing but that hott little number she wore in Taipae?"

Ok. Lets see if he catches onto the sarcasm here. Please catch on! Please!

V: "OK! Great idea Eric! Why don't I come to you for everything? Hey, do you think she'd bring a whip?"

Oh geeze Mike. I really do worry about where your going in life.

E: " Mike, all you need to do is go to her house, bring roses, and tell her that you love her. Simple as that!"

V: " So no whip?"

E: " No whip"

V: " But I wanted the whip."

E: "Forget about the whip! Focus on the problem....I mean Syd."

V: " OK. But hey, what about protocol?"

E: " Who gives a damn about protocol when you've got Sydney Bristow?"

V: " Who gives a damn about protocol when I've got Sydney Bristow?"

By George, I think he's got it!

E: " Right. Now go tell her that!"

V: " Ok. No , wait. I can't go in without practice. OK. Eric, you be Sydney."

He will so pay for this later!

E: " OK...ahem. ( Speaking in a higher voice) Oh, Vaughn. I was so worried when you came to my house while I was in the tub. YOu look so sexy in that pink speedo swimsuit. ( bats his eyelashes )

V: " ha ha. not funny. ok. Syd, I just wanted to let you know that I don't give a damn about protocol as long as I have Sydney Bristow! uh...I mean you."

E: "Oh, Vaughn , I don't know what to say. Are you trying to say that you love me?"

V: " Love you? Oh , Sydney, I watch you sleep by night and follow you by day. I know everything about you Sydney!"

E: " You're stalking me? How horrid! Stay away from me, you brut! I think I'm going to go make out with Eric Weiss. Oh...Eric! He's so handsome, sexy, strong, and irresistible."

V: " Eric! Your supposed to be helping me here!"

E: " I am! You have to be prepared for the best...I mean worst circumstances."

V: "Heck, I don't have time for this. I'm going home to ask Donovan what to do. At least he cares about me!"

E: under his breath "Donovan don't care about you skinny ass. Maybe if you fed him once in a while."

V: "What did you say?"

E: " I said that did you know that Devlin has a cast? And that he might get wed?

V: " No...hmm. What is this world coming to? Anyway, I'm off to see Syd. Tell me that I'll do great."

E: "You'll do great! Go get her Romeo!"

V: "Farwell to thee, must go thither to seek out fair lady"

E: "Bye Now! And you'll do great!"

Vaughn leaves

He is so in trouble!