Disclaimer: No. I don't own Digimon. If I did, I wouldn't be writing this and Digimon would be shown at 10pm!! And I don't own the song 'If Only You Knew'. I don't know who does though. **blushes** sorry!
A/N: Right, here, is a little fic that I have written for Christmas. Hope you all like it, please review!
It's a little piece of angsty/fluffy/romantic-y Matt centric fic. It will be Taito in the end though. :-) don't you worry.
Warnings: TAITO!! would you expect anything else?!
Merry Christmas
It was the night before Christmas… I thought that everyone was meant to be excited the day before Christmas, but I'm not. I don't look forward to Christmas because I spend Christmas alone. Every year dad's off working and my friends are out visiting relatives.
Dad never tells mom that he's never there for me; otherwise she'd whisk me off on holiday with them. I think that they were going somewhere in Scotland this year. I wish I had gone with them.
Matt looked over at the Christmas tree in the corner of the room. It was sparsely decorated, as was the rest of the house. Matt was a decoration minimalist. He didn't like all the tinsel and baubles and stars and glitter, they were only up for a few days and then taken down and shut away for a year.
He sighed in defeat as he looked around his small apartment. It was depressing, it really was. He sat down and pondered over the object of his affection. Tai.
Taichi… Gods, I love you Tai… How come I can never tell him? I love you. Three simple words that are so easy to say when there is no one about, but I can't say them to who I want to. But what if he thinks I'm sick and then never talks to me again?! So I can't tell him, but I can't not tell him, because that's not fair on me, or him! Gods, why does love have to be so complicated?
His eyes filled with tears as he contemplated. He contemplated about Tai, and what would happen if Tai became someone else's boyfriend, like Sora, or Mimi! He wouldn't be able to stand it if either of them got married to Tai. He lifted his guitar and strummed a few chords before a song began to form in his head. Before he could stop himself, the words came pouring out and he sang. He didn't notice the door open or a mass of gravity defying hair poke through the door and a lithe, tanned, blue-shirted body slide in and shut the door silently.
"I must have rehearsed my lines a thousand times,
Until I had them memorized.
But when I get up the nerve to tell you,
The words just never seem to come out right.
If only you knew how much I do,
Do love you. If only you knew,
How much I do, I do need you.
I dream of moments we share but your not there,
I'm living in a fantasy.
Cause you don't even suspect,
Could probably care less,
About the changes I been going through.
If only you knew how much I do,
Do love you. If only you knew,
How much I do, I do need you.
No, you don't even suspect,
Could probably care less,
About the changes I been going through.
If only you knew how much I do,
Do love you. If only you knew,
How much I do, I do need you.
If only you knew how much I do,
Do love you. If only you knew,
How much I do, I do need you.
Oh, if, if....
In my....
Love you.....
Life....You don't know,
I say you don't know,
How much I need you sugar,
If only you knew,
How much I do,
I say you don't know that I love you,
And I'm so fond of you...I love you baby."
He strummed the last chord before letting out a sigh. Tai clapped loudly, startling the blond and causing him to leap to his feet.
"That was beautiful Matt." Tai said, wiping a pretend tear from his eye. Matt just glared at his best friend and long-time crush.
"There's no need to make fun Tai."
"Who's the lucky girl?" Matt looked at him confused.
"Huh?" He asked intelligently.
"The girl in the song." Matt looked down guiltily.
"It's not a girl." He whispered. Tai's eyes widened.
"You're gay?!" Matt nodded. Tai raised an eyebrow. "Oh."
"I would have liked to have told you slightly better."
"Ngh." Tai nodded. "Right. So… who was the song about?"
"Er…" Matt flushed. "…"
"Do you really love him?" Tai asked. Matt nodded. "So who was the song about?"
"wasboutyou" Matt mumbled. Tai's eyes widened and he left the apartment, shutting the door hard behind him. Matt crumpled onto the floor. "Damn it!"
Well, that went well. Tai wasn't supposed to hear that song, and he wasn't supposed to find out. Now he's going to never talk to me again and I couldn't bear that! I would have rather been best friends with him than let our relationship go any further. Oh well, that's life I suppose, fate is cruel.
He cast his gaze to the clock and saw that it was almost midnight. Hm, time flies when you're feeling sorry for yourself. He thought bitterly. He lay a few presents under the tree and went into his room. He knew that his father probably wouldn't come home tonight, and not at all tomorrow. Oh well, another Christmas alone.
Matt lay down on his bed and stared at the ceiling before he slowly drifted off to sleep.
***
The next morning, Matt woke to see the sun reflecting off of crisp, clean snow.
"Good bloody morning." He grumbled. "Hello to another day of loneliness."
He got dressed and made himself some breakfast before flopping onto the sofa. Home Alone was on the television and he let out a frustrated sigh before turning it off.
After moping around for over 3 hours, just feeling sorry for himself, Matt walked outside. He cursed as he forgot his coat and ran back into his apartment. Once he had grabbed his coat and locked the door, he headed for a café.
He sat there, staring gloomily into his coffee cup until the coffee had gone cold and he was told to go home.
"It's 8pm son, you've been here all day. Go home." Matt reluctantly left the café and began his walk home. But he didn't bother to walk quickly. He had no reason to go home, no one to go home too. He felt his heart tear as he remembered what had happened on Christmas Eve.
He paused outside his apartment door, hearing muttering from inside. He pushed open the door quietly, almost fearfully, his father wouldn't be home, so who was it? Once the door had opened sufficiently, Matt slid in and saw Tai pacing around the couch, muttering to himself.
Matt shook his head and hung his coat up before taking a step forwards. Tai looked up and relief spread across his features. He ran at Matt and glomped the blond, knocking them both down to the floor.
"Matt! I was so worried! Where have you been?! Been going out of my mind over here, I,"
"Tai!"
"I rang you this morning to see what you were doing and then there was no answer, and every time I rang you didn't pick up! So I came over, and you weren't here."
"Tai!!"
"I rang everywhere, and I couldn't find you! Nowhere! It was like you had just disappeared so I waited here for you. I've been here for three, maybe four hours!"
"TAI!" Tai shut up and looked down at Matt who was pinned beneath him. "Shut up." Tai somewhat sheepishly got off Matt and helped him up.
Oh God… why's he here? Does he not know how much torture I'm going through?
"Want something to drink Tai?" Before Tai could answer, Matt answered for him. "Ask a stupid question…" Matt began making hot chocolate. He collected the mugs from the cupboard and waited for the water to boil. Once it had, he spooned the hot chocolate powder into the cup and poured hot water into the mugs. "Here. Don't forget to stir it. You know where the spoons are."
"Thanks." Tai said, taking the cup and taking out a spoon from the drawer and passing Matt one. They sat down at the table on opposite ends in relative silence. Both boys felt increasingly uncomfortable, there had never been this much tension and silence between them before, not even when they hated each other. Tai shifted nervously before breaking the silence. "Hey Matt, I, I er, I got your Christmas present…" Matt's eyes widened and he forced himself to calm down.
Calm yourself Matt. You did get him a present; you just temporarily mislaid it… Calm down.
Matt noticed the small parcel that Tai had slid over the table. He looked down at it before looking at Tai then back at the parcel.
"Well, are you going to open it or not?" Tai asked. Matt nodded and started taking off the paper. His eyes widened further as a small box was revealed. He opened it and saw a sliver ring, with a wolf engraved on it, a blue stone as an eye. "It's not quite as good as the song, but I hope you like it." Matt took the ring out of the box and looked at it, momentarily speechless. "It's a promise ring." Tai explained.
"Oh Tai," He whispered, putting it on and stepping over to stand next to the brunette. "It's beautiful!" Matt hugged him and his smile widened as Tai hugged back.
Hesitantly, their faces moved closer together, until they could feel each other's breath on their faces. With uncertainty, Matt tilted his head slightly and moved even closer to Tai as they kissed, a fiery passion running through them as their lips met.
When they broke apart, both boys' lungs burning in need of air, they both grinned and collapsed on the sofa.
"Merry Christmas Tai."
"Merry Christmas Matt. It looks like you won't be spending any more Christmases alone."
A/N: I just want to say a HUGE thank you to Death's Daughter who helped me out immensely when I got stuck writing this. I luv ya gal! Oh, btw, the fluffy bit at the end? That was all her fault!
Death's Daughter: MWAHAHAHA! I have corrupted her to fluff! BOW DOWN BEFORE ME AND TREMBLE! FOR YOU SHALL BE NEXT!!!
Okay now… **locks Death's Daughter in a cupboard** No more sweets for you…
Please review, it is Christmas after all!!
Willow
~x~