Last Christmas

By DKM

Rating: PG-13

Category: Christmas Fic

Music: "Last Christmas" by Darren Hayes (Oh, come ON! How could I go through any fic without mentioning him somewhere?)

Summary: Last Christmas, Jake McCarty gave his heart to Sara Pezzini. This Christmas, the memory comes back to haunt him.

Author's Note: This is a little bit of a spoiler for Part 3 of The Twisted, Tied Up, and Tangled Series. Hopefully I don't give up too much in this fic to show you what's going to happen. For those of you who haven't even begun to read the series, I suggest now being the best time since Part 1 is almost done, and I'm halfway through writing Part 2. For those of you reading it, I hope you like this and don't get pissed at me for giving away a few precious details. For all of you, please enjoy the fic!

Archive: Email me at Dmmuzicfan@aol.com.

Feedback/Comments: SEE EMAIL ABOVE OR BE NICE AND SUBMIT A REVIEW!

Disclaimer: The usual, you should know it by now.

1 Year Earlier:

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance
But you still catch my eye
Tell me baby, do you recognize me?
Well it's been a year
It doesn't surprise me
'Happy Christmas'
I wrapped it up and sent it
With a letter saying I love you
I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now
I know you'd fool me again

"Hey, rookie," came the voice of the angel Jake McCarty had been waiting to hear that night ever since the stupid 11th Precinct Christmas party began. He spun around to find Sara Pezzini, his partner and probably one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen, walk up behind him holding a Champaign flute in her right hand as she wrapped her left arm around his.

Jake stared at her with wide eyes. This was the first time he had ever seen Sara in a dress, especially one so brightly colored. He loved how the red silk flowed over her flawless body and the way it was accented by her bracelet. And on top of her head was a little red Santa hat.

"Well, if it isn't Mrs. Clause herself," Jake replied as held her in a tight embrace. She smiled at him, her lips daring him to get close and kiss them. Jake knew he had to get a grip and stay away. It was a bad idea to get too close to a coworker, especially one like Sara Pezzini. Yeah, she was drop dead gorgeous and had a wonderful personality, but the way she kept him out of the loop was annoying. But deep down, there was a part of him that ached for her to reveal her secrets to him. He didn't care if they would hurt him or get him killed. She was just so mysterious, and he was willing to take the risk.

"Do you really like it?" Sara asked, pointing to her dress as she escaped Jake's grasp and twirled around to show him all of it. She looked spectacular, but he didn't dare say that out loud.

"It looks good on you, Pez," Jake said.

"Is the hat going a little overboard?" she questioned, almost pulling it off her head.

"No, that's definitely not going overboard. I think all you need is fluffy white trim around the bottom of your dress and your outfit is complete," he blurted, suddenly realizing the mistake he had just made. Sara began to laugh, though. Thank God she had taken it as a joke.

"So, you wanna ditch this party?" she asked, taking the hat off and beginning to fuss with her hair.

"Nothing would make me happier," Jake answered as he took her arm and quietly led her away from the crowd of people around them. As they stepped outside, a light snow was beginning to fall. The ground was already dusted slightly as Jake helped her walk to his car.

"I guess we're actually going to have a white Christmas this year," Sara commented as she tried not to slip and fall on her heels. She was finding it had to get traction and relied on him whenever she lost her balance, which was quite often. When they finally made it to the car, he helped her slip into the passenger's seat. Sara immediately kicked off her shoes, feeing much more comfortable now that they were lying on the floor beside her feet instead of on them.

"Yeah, pretty nice if you asked me, seeing that I've never really had the privilege of a true white Christmas," Jake said as he started the car and pulled out of the parking lot and onto the street. "Where to?"

"Somewhere that I can get a real drink," Sara answered with a smile.

"Alright, to the first bar we see!" he replied enthusiastically. A few blocks down, Jake stopped in front of the only bar still open at three in the morning. He helped Sara into the bustling pub and found them stools at the bar.

The drinks slowly began to pile up in front of them as they sat and talked about almost anything and everything from Jake's surfing days to Sara's childhood. He noted how she managed to drink more when she talked about that frustrating period in her life. By the time she put down her last bottle of beer, Sara seemed to slur every word that left her mouth.

"Maybe it's time that I took you home," Jake said as he helped her to her feet.

"Oh, come on, McCarty, one more drink," Sara pleaded as he led her away from the bar and towards the door. She seemed to stumble even more now that the alcohol was circulation through her system in copious amounts.

"I think you've had enough for one night," he gently replied as she leaned heavily against his body. Sara was definitely beyond being able to take herself home that night, and Jake was glad that she hadn't left the party alone. He eased her into the passenger's seat of his car and slowly drove to her place since the roads were now covered in almost an inch and a half of snow.

After parking in the alley beside Sara's building, Jake found himself in a predicament. How was he ever going to get Sara into her apartment without having her trip and fall all over herself? She was babbling on about how she hated her shoes, so he decided to pick her up and carry her up the stairs. The task proved to be easier said that done. She was a restless drunk, swinging her arms about as they began their ascent up the stairs to her apartment.

When they finally reached her floor, Sara slipped out of Jake's arms and began to fiddle with her purse, looking for her keys. Jake snatched it away from her and pulled them out. He opened the door and led her inside where she quickly kicked off her shoes and headed into the bedroom, stopping at the threshold and looking back at him with amorous eyes

With a devious smiled, Sara asked, "Would you like to help me out of this dress?" Jake knew the offer was tempting. It had been something he had imagined ever since the first day he met Sara, but seeing her so intoxicated, he decided against it, no matter how badly his body wanted to. It was wrong to take advantage of someone so fragile. "Fine," she pouted, stumbling into the room.

Jake remained at the front door, respecting Sara's privacy, until he heard a loud thud come from the bedroom. He ran inside to find Sara on the floor, her face plastered to the polished wood and her eyes closed. The scene would have been pretty comical under different conditions, but Jake knew this was no laughing matter. He picked Sara up off the floor and delicately laid her on the bed.

A goofy grin appeared on Sara's face as her eyes fluttered open. "Stupid me," she muttered.

"Don't worry, it never happened," Jake whispered as he tucked her into bed.

"Then neither did this," Sara replied, grabbing him by his collar and pulling him towards her lips for a delicate kiss.

Jake could feel his body succumb to the feelings that he desperately tried to push away as the kiss deepened. Sara's hold was much stronger that he imagined, and soon, he was on top of her, holding her in his arms as they continued to kiss. Abruptly, he pulled away and said, "This is so wrong."

"No, it's not," Sara whined as she tried to pull Jake in for another kiss. He pushed himself away from the bed and towards the door. "Jake! Come back!" she called. He didn't turn around. "At least give me a reason why it's so wrong!"

He spun around quickly and marched back into her room. "Because I love you too much," Jake answered, exposing his heart to her for the first time. "And I don't want you to regret this. Maybe some time in the future when you have some idea as to what's going on, we can let this happen, but not now. Not while you're intoxicated."

Sara looked disappointed. "Whatever," she replied. "Your loss." She rolled over onto her side, unable to see the painful expression that came across his face. Jake turned and left the room, his heart feeling like it had just been caught in a blender in puree mode. He walked out of the apartment building and back to his car. Before even getting inside, he stole a look up into Sara's window to see that she had probably already passed out. His mind began to drift to what might have been if this night had gone in a different direction.

The kiss would remain on Jake's mind even as he drove back to his place and went to bed. He dreamed about it, wondering if it had actually happened, or if it had just been a figment of his imagination. When he woke up later that morning to the sound of Christmas carols playing all over his building, Jake tried to drown it out with rock music cranked up as high as his stereo would go. It drowned out almost every sound, including the phone, which was still in his pocket, buzzing incessantly. When he finally decided to pick it up, he was surprised by who it was.

"Jake, what happened last night?" Sara asked in a groggy and very raspy voice. He knew that she didn't remember anything beyond the Christmas party, easing his soul a little more.

"You got really drunk and I took you home," Jake answered softly, realizing that her head was probably still spinning.

"Thank you," she replied. "I don't think I would have made it home alive if it wasn't for you."

"You're welcome," he said, smiling a sad and sorry smile. If only she had remembered that kiss. It would have meant utter joy and misery at the same time. In this case, it was better to forget that it even happened. After all, she had been the one who said it never happened.

"Hey, I've got to get going. I really don't think you want to hear about my up chuck reflexes right now, so I'll leave you alone until tomorrow," Sara told him just before hanging up.

"You're right, I don't," he joked. "Have a merry Christmas, Sara."

"You too, Jake."

He hung up the phone and threw it onto the couch then looked at his sorry excuse for a Christmas tree, a small plastic leafless tree with a little bit of tinsel and ornaments as decoration. Jake smiled; there was one gift under it, one he had been waiting to give to someone special. 'I guess it'll have to wait until next year,' he thought, picking it up in his hand and placing it in his desk drawer for safe keeping until next Christmas.

The Present:

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

A crowded room friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice
My God! I thought you were someone to rely on
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man under cover but you tore me apart
Now I've found a real love you'll never fool me again

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Jake parked in the alley beside Sara's building that snowy Christmas Eve night, and, with large back of gifts under each arm, made his way up to her apartment where all his friends had gathered to spend Christmas with Sara, her new boyfriend, correction, soon to be fiancé, Darren Hayes, and their baby daughter, Mira, who was only days old.

In the last nine months, several things had changed in his life. Sara had fallen in love with one musician who had unexpectedly died in her arms, then fell in love again with another musician, this time saying that he was her true destiny. Jake had stopped following the soap opera even though he had confessed his feelings for Sara at a time when she really didn't need the extra stress. It had taken several months to clear the episode from her mind, even though it probably still lingered there from time to time, dissipating whenever she was with Darren, and becoming quite clear when she and Jake were alone in a room.

Now, knowing that Darren was going to propose to Sara that night, Jake wished he wasn't at the party fearing that he'd probably walk out just as the crucial moment came upon him. The last thing he wanted to see was the one woman he loved accept a proposal from another man.

Jake felt like slapping himself for being so stupid. Why he was being so cynical baffled him since to his right stood another woman he was beginning to fall madly in love with. She wasn't Sara, but she was someone he knew loved him as much as he loved her. Christina Arsovska was her name, and she was a young Macedonian girl who had just moved to New York after accepting a job with Columbia Records as a CD cover designer. She was a gifted young artist, and a very intellectually stimulating person. Once she started a conversation, it would go on for hours without stopping. This was going to be the first time she was actually introduced to Jake's closest friends.

Christina stood beside him as he knocked at Sara's door, which soon opened to reveal her holding a tiny bundle in her arms. "Come in!" she enthusiastically motioned to them as she smiled. "Finally, you're here! What took you so long?"

"Traffic," Jake answered. "It's snowing again."

"Oh, I guess it's going to be another white Christmas," Sara said as she led them into the living room of her apartment where everyone else had gathered. "So, are you going to introduce me?" she asked, referring to the woman who was quietly walking by his side.

"Sara, this is Christina Arsovska, Christina, this is my partner, Sara Pezzini," Jake introduced.

"Please to finally meet the girl who's stolen my friend's heart," Sara politely replied as she extended her free hand. Christina blushed as did Jake. "This is my daughter, Mira. Darren should be around here somewhere. Give me a sec to find him." Sara scurried off to find him while Christina and Jake were left alone.

"So, she's the one that got away," Christina said as she helped him put the gifts down without breaking them.

"Yep," Jake replied, letting his feelings flood through his body as he remembered that last Christmas when he had taken Sara home and almost ended up in bed with her. He turned to face Christina, and slowly those feelings began to dissipate as new ones took their place. Looking into her hazel brown eyes, he found something there that never existed in Sara, true love. Maybe it was a good thing that he and Sara didn't spend that night together. Maybe fate had stepped in just in time to send his this angel standing before him.

"Have you gotten over her?" Christina asked, wanting that reassurance from him that she was truly his one and only.

"I'm so over her," Jake said. "You're the one for me, and I see that every time I look into your eyes." He ran his fingers through her hair and leaned in to kiss her. Love was definitely present in that kiss; unlike that one he had shared with Sara a year before, which was filled with lust and passion.

Christina looked into his crystal blue eyes and smiled. "I love you," she whispered as she tightly embraced him.

"I love you, too," Jake whispered back, confirming his own feelings for his girlfriend. He really was over Sara if he was willing to speak those words to another woman. He reached behind his back and pulled out the small present he had saved from the year before last that he said he would give to someone special. That special person had finally arrived, and he was ready to give up that small package.

"What's that?" Christina inquired as he held it out in front of her.

"A little something I was saving for someone special," he answered. "Open it."

Christina took the small box into her hands and gently began to peel off the wrapping. Beneath the plain red paper, she found a small velvet box. Opening it, she discovered a beautiful white gold necklace with matching heart shaped pendant inside. Jake flipped it over so she could read the inscription.

"To the one I love and will cherish for all eternity," Christina read aloud as the tears began to form in her eyes. "Oh, Jake!" She couldn't help the emotions that suddenly filled her heart.

"It belonged to my mother," he began to explain. "She told me to give it to that one special girl that came along, the one I knew I wanted to marry. I think you can guess where this is going."

Christina nodded as tears spilled down her cheeks. "But not now," she said. "This is Darren and Sara's night. Let them have the attention, and tomorrow we can have ours."

"Alright," Jake replied even though he wanted to badly to propose to her that very second. But he had promised himself that he wouldn't do it until after Darren and Sara. After all, Darren had been planning this ever since Thanksgiving while Jake's proposal was more spur of the moment than thought out even though he knew deep down inside it was right. He looked over at Christina, who was now bright and cheery with excitement.

From across the room, Sara looked over at the two of them and saw how happy they were. She smiled, and Jake smiled back, realizing that there was nothing more to their relationship than friendship. Like he said before, he was so over her. It was about time that he moved on.

The End