SusanvVetinariChapterThree.
I think I'm going to have to start to write this in a very different style as to how I started to write the first two chapters. From now on I think that this story is going to be extremely AU and OOC. If you liked it how it was before, maybe I could post an alternative to what I've written in this chapter.
I own none of the following characters. (Jessicca's already been sold to the slave markets).
For reference on Lord Vetinari's Jammy Dodger addiction see "Biscuits".
Chapter Three:
"Daddy?"
Lord Vetinari swallowed almost convulsively, choked on some crumbs and righted himself as his daughter sauntered into the Oblong Office.
He realised that he still held the biscuit tin on his lap and quickly stowed it away into his bottom draw before Jessicca could reach his desk.
"Daddy?"
"Yes, dear?"
Jessicca tried to haul herself onto Vetinari's lap, slipped halfway and flung out her hand to steady herself.
The Patrician ground his teeth and tried to prise Jesicca's hand from the anatomy upon which it had landed heavily on.
After he had done this, he lifted her up on to his lap, wincing slightly and shifting uncomfortably.
"Daddy?"
"Yes?"
His daughter took hold of one of his ears and pulled his head down until his head was level with hers.
She then spat in his ear.
Vetinari pulled his head back sharply and frowned at Jessicca slightly.
"You climbed three floors of this Palace from your playroom, stopped me in my work and bruised a painful part of my body just to expectorate in my ear?"
Jessicca shook her head.
"Well, what did you want?"
"I was *whispering* something."
"Oh."
The Patrician stared down at her and wondered what could be so important.
"Well, if you're unsure about anything about your body, you'd better ask the house-keeper." Vetinari hazarded.
Jessicca looked at him blankly.
"Oh, it's not that then." Vetinari looked somewhat relieved.
"What did you mean about anything about m -"
"Well, I'm glad that that's all sorted out, what did you *really* want to talk about?" Vetinari cut in rather briskly, using his "don't you dare mention that subject again" voice. Jessicca caught the rather unsubtle hint.
She pulled his head down again. Vetinari obliged, feeling that if he was going to have a bad day then he may as well get it over and done with. He suffered a light overall spraying as she whispered something unintelligible in his ear.
The Patrician pulled out a handkerchief from somewhere n his robe and dabbed the side of his face dry.
"I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear that either."
Jessicca hugged her father and rubbed her face against his chest.
The Patrician sighed. This was the sort of day that where he wished he had some of those pills that the Unseen University's Bursar was so keen on.
"I told the teacher that you had AIDs." She whispered into his robe.
The Patrician sat absolutely still, not moving a muscle.
Jessicca buried her head even further.
Lord Havelock Vetinari thught some very rude words. He was thinking along the lines of :
*Where the f**k did she get that from?!?* He thought frantically whilst his face was careful immobile. *Well, at least the stupid woman won't "go" for me now.* A much calmer voice cut in. *You *know* what happened when Jessicca *last* said something like that* Vetinari's calmer concious nodded metaphorically. The whole city had been avoiding im like the plague, which is roughly what Jessicca had said he'd got. Bubonically.
"Even Vimes was looking at me oddly after that." He said aload.
"What?"
"Umm." Vetinari went on auto-pilot father. "You have been a very naughty girl, you're grounded."
Jessicca nodded merrily and skipped off to go and torment some other poor being.
I know. very short chapter. If you like it how I just wrote it then I'll continue in this style (please tell me in your review).
If you liked it how it was before, please say this in your review and I'll go back to writing in that style.
If you don't like this story at all (approx. half the Disc. Fan population) then please tell me why. (In a nice way, preferably)
I think I'm going to have to start to write this in a very different style as to how I started to write the first two chapters. From now on I think that this story is going to be extremely AU and OOC. If you liked it how it was before, maybe I could post an alternative to what I've written in this chapter.
I own none of the following characters. (Jessicca's already been sold to the slave markets).
For reference on Lord Vetinari's Jammy Dodger addiction see "Biscuits".
Chapter Three:
"Daddy?"
Lord Vetinari swallowed almost convulsively, choked on some crumbs and righted himself as his daughter sauntered into the Oblong Office.
He realised that he still held the biscuit tin on his lap and quickly stowed it away into his bottom draw before Jessicca could reach his desk.
"Daddy?"
"Yes, dear?"
Jessicca tried to haul herself onto Vetinari's lap, slipped halfway and flung out her hand to steady herself.
The Patrician ground his teeth and tried to prise Jesicca's hand from the anatomy upon which it had landed heavily on.
After he had done this, he lifted her up on to his lap, wincing slightly and shifting uncomfortably.
"Daddy?"
"Yes?"
His daughter took hold of one of his ears and pulled his head down until his head was level with hers.
She then spat in his ear.
Vetinari pulled his head back sharply and frowned at Jessicca slightly.
"You climbed three floors of this Palace from your playroom, stopped me in my work and bruised a painful part of my body just to expectorate in my ear?"
Jessicca shook her head.
"Well, what did you want?"
"I was *whispering* something."
"Oh."
The Patrician stared down at her and wondered what could be so important.
"Well, if you're unsure about anything about your body, you'd better ask the house-keeper." Vetinari hazarded.
Jessicca looked at him blankly.
"Oh, it's not that then." Vetinari looked somewhat relieved.
"What did you mean about anything about m -"
"Well, I'm glad that that's all sorted out, what did you *really* want to talk about?" Vetinari cut in rather briskly, using his "don't you dare mention that subject again" voice. Jessicca caught the rather unsubtle hint.
She pulled his head down again. Vetinari obliged, feeling that if he was going to have a bad day then he may as well get it over and done with. He suffered a light overall spraying as she whispered something unintelligible in his ear.
The Patrician pulled out a handkerchief from somewhere n his robe and dabbed the side of his face dry.
"I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear that either."
Jessicca hugged her father and rubbed her face against his chest.
The Patrician sighed. This was the sort of day that where he wished he had some of those pills that the Unseen University's Bursar was so keen on.
"I told the teacher that you had AIDs." She whispered into his robe.
The Patrician sat absolutely still, not moving a muscle.
Jessicca buried her head even further.
Lord Havelock Vetinari thught some very rude words. He was thinking along the lines of :
*Where the f**k did she get that from?!?* He thought frantically whilst his face was careful immobile. *Well, at least the stupid woman won't "go" for me now.* A much calmer voice cut in. *You *know* what happened when Jessicca *last* said something like that* Vetinari's calmer concious nodded metaphorically. The whole city had been avoiding im like the plague, which is roughly what Jessicca had said he'd got. Bubonically.
"Even Vimes was looking at me oddly after that." He said aload.
"What?"
"Umm." Vetinari went on auto-pilot father. "You have been a very naughty girl, you're grounded."
Jessicca nodded merrily and skipped off to go and torment some other poor being.
I know. very short chapter. If you like it how I just wrote it then I'll continue in this style (please tell me in your review).
If you liked it how it was before, please say this in your review and I'll go back to writing in that style.
If you don't like this story at all (approx. half the Disc. Fan population) then please tell me why. (In a nice way, preferably)