ZIM whipped around to face Devi, amidst the flashing red lights and the alarm noises.
"PAYING?!" he yelled, "WHAT IS THIS 'PAYING'?!"
"You give us money, we give you the thing!"
"MONEY? ZIM NEEDS NO MONEY!"
Dib came rushing up to see what the noise was about, carrying a GameSlave game for Gaz in his hands. He saw ZIM, standing cluelessly in the center of the spotlights that were now circulating around, put his hand in his head and sighed. He walked over to ZIM.
"You don't really expect to get out of the store without BUYING the thing first, do you ZIM?"
"ZIM needs no money!"
"Yes, you do. Everyone needs money to buy stuff."
"ZIM does not need money! ZIM should not have to give anything for this stink-thing, for ZIM is so vastly superior to you all that you should all be bowing down to me anyway! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"
While ZIM carried on about not needing money, and how the Earththings were so stupid that they did, Dib paid for his GameSlave.
"I'll buy that guy's stuff, too, since he obviously doesn't know what money is for..."
"Okay." The clerk smiled. "Here's your change. Have a MERRY CHRISTMAS!"
A moose from one display or another promptly fell on the poor store clerk's head, and Dib exited the store.
The lights went off, the sirens stopped, and ZIM looked around for a moment or two.
"Why are they stopping?" he inquired, walking over to the clerk, who was pulling the moose off his head.
"That kid just bought your stuff for you. Isn't he so full of holiday spirit? Giving is what Christmas is all about! Well, actually, Christmas is all about the birth of a little boy who went on to become--"
The moose landed on his head again, and ZIM exited the store.
GIR was waiting outside, still attached to his leash, sleeping in the snow.
"C'mon GIR, we don't have all night. I must figure out the proper way to give a gift to someone. If I cannot figure out how, then these stupid Earththings may... may..."
The thought was too horrible to think. GIR didn't stir.
"COME ON, GIR!" ZIM yelled, losing patience and kicking him.
The robot-dog stirred. "Yes, SIR!"
ZIM sighed at the utter hopelessness of the robot. "Hold this gift while I figure out the way back to our home."
He handed GIR the boxset.
"OOH! Whazzis?"
GIR began to turn over the movies, let out a squeal at finding out that it was possible to remove them from the box, and set about destroying the gift.
ZIM turned around, confident he had figured out the way home, and saw GIR pulling the film out of the tapes.
"NO! GIR, STOP THAT!"
GIR froze and looked up at ZIM.
ZIM picked up the now ruined tapes from their snowy home where GIR had dropped them and sighed. Another genius plan destroyed. No Earthenoid was stupid to want a pile of broken videos for Christmas.
He dropped the videos in a nearby trashcan and began his way back home, dragging GIR on the leash unhappily.
"GIR, you've done it again! You have ruined yet another of my genius plans. Although, of course, this plan wasn't so much for world domination as it was a step to 'becoming the enemy'… but still! The point remains that you have destroyed my Christmas, GIR!"
He looked backward, probably preparing to let out another scolding, to find GIR pointing at a small stall down the way.
"What is it, GIR?"
"GIFT! GIIIIIIIFT!!"
ZIM raised an eyebrow, but decided it couldn't hurt to check out the stand anyway. He proceeded to retrace his steps back to the shack GIR was pointing to.
"Daddy, Daddy, wake up! There's a man coming, Daddy! Maybe he wants to buy something!"
The little girl shook her sleeping father at seeing ZIM approach. The dad let out a bit of a "Wha? Huh?" before seeing the little green man approaching. He adopted a very servile attitude as ZIM came up to the stand.
"Do you sell… er… GIFTS here, pitiful Earth creature?"
The man let out a small frown at being called 'pitiful' – even though he owned virtually nothing and his poor daughter was clothed in naught but rags, he hated people pointing it out. He remembered, however, that this was a customer, however rude.
"Yes, yes. Our crafts make perfect Christmas gifts. Are you a late shopper, sir? It IS already Christmas morning!"
The man pointed to his watch. Sure enough, it was Christmas morning. By about two minutes.
"Yes, I am a late shopper. What kind of gifts do you recommend? Be quick, I have yet to wrap it."
The little girl tugged at ZIM's Pak, holding a sno-globe in her other hand.
"This is very pretty, Mr Customer-Sir-Person."
ZIM took a glance at the sno-globe, not even knowing what it was, and took it from the hands of the little girl.
"I will take this. How much… er… paying must I be doing for it?"
"It's ten dollars, sir."
ZIM flinched a bit. He had forgotten he still had no money. He looked over at GIR, playing in the snow, oblivious to the dilemma.
"GIR!" he called, causing the robot to come to alert. "GIR… where did I leave my … uhm… monies?"
"OVER THERE SIR!" GIR said, saluting and pointing to the left, where a snowbank sat against a wall.
"Ah. Yes. Wait a moment."
ZIM dug around in the snowbank until he found somebody's wallet. (Hey, I had to make this work somehow.)
"Here is your money. Have a… a… Merry Christmas."
The little girl flashed a smile and waved. "You too, Mr Green Man!"
ZIM shook his head. The way humans acted…! He motioned GIR to follow him, and they started their way home. Again.
Dib was also making his way home through the streets, his head barely visible through the pile of gifts for his family he carried. It WAS his family, after all, even if they mostly ignored him. He was humming softly to himself, carrying along his merry way, when he remembered ZIM.
He had lost ZIM.
For a moment he seemed ready to scream, then just shrugged as much as possible when you have a huge tower of gifts in your hands, and started walking again. He supposed that there hadn't really been any dangerous activity going on after all, and besides, it'd been Christmas for a whole ten minutes already! There really wasn't any reason to worry about ZIM.
THUMP.
No reason to worry about ZIM, but plenty of reason to worry about the plethora of gifts that had fallen onto the snow due to somebody colliding into him.
"I'm so sorry!" he said, and began to pick up the presents. Whoever it was he had knocked into did the same, until they were piled nicely again, and ready for Dib to pick up.
"I really am sorry, sir, I didn't even see you com-…"
He had looked up, and saw a certain green alien boy still piling the presents.
"ZIM!"
ZIM turned from the presents to look at Dib. "DIB!"
They just glared daggers at one another for a moment, before ZIM reached nervously behind his back and pulled out a small shape.
"Uhm… Dib? This is for you… for… Christmas." He held forward the sno-globe, hunching back a bit in preparation for whatever odd fate awaited him.
Instead, Dib took the sno-globe from his hands gently. He shook it a couple of times and watched the snow fall around the plastic children contained inside it.
He looked up again and ZIM was gone.
"Hey, Dib, wake up! Its Christmas already, and I want to open my presents. Get up. NOW."
Dib brushed the dust form his eyes and began to pull on his glasses. He was about to make his way downstairs when he turned around to look at the window. There was still no activity from the house next door, but he wasn't too worried about it. He took the small sno-globe off the windowsill and shook it, watching the snow fall softly around the happy children again. A smile crossed his face.
"Merry Christmas, ZIM."
author's notes:
Well, that's it. That's the story. What a coincidence I finished it on Christmas Day, ne? ^^; actually, its more of my being lazy and not looking at this thing since I last updated until sometime yesterday… heh heh.
Anyhow, I wanted to end it nicely – no Doomsday battles, no horrible fat Santas getting attacked, no real talk of doom at all (gasp! How dare I?). I like it this way. I also am partial to the ending. Just because it's so nice and all happy and Christmas-y. Even if it's totally impossible. Oh well.
Reviews appreciated, reviewers loved.
All characters that are actually NAMED in this thing (ZIM, Dib, GIR, Devi) are © Jhonen Vasquez, the spiky-haired master of the Doombees. The only thing I own is the story itself… and that sure isn't much. ^^; heh heh. So don't sure ME. I have no money anyhow.
Merry Christmas (or whatever holiday your denomination celebrates) to everyone.
-megumi