Disclaimer: In case you were wondering, which I know you weren't, I don't
own Lord of the Rings. I'm working on it, though!!
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Dear Flabby,
I speak as an annoyed orc of Mordor. My problem is that in every battle scene, the orcs get their heads cut off, and the human protagonists always survive! It's quite bad enough that we look like a pregnant mother of seven in the morning before her coffee. (The expression, I mean, not the femininity.)
Quite frankly, I'm tired of being always on the side of the bad guy! Hey, dude, we're just doing out job! I just wish people would give us more credit. Whenever an orc gets shot, the viewers feel good. Do you have any idea how offensive this is?
Thank you for getting my views out to the public.
~Tired-Of-Antagonist-Discrimination
Dear Antagonist,
I honestly believe you have some valid points here, but is this what all orcs think?
However, it would be great for you to show your good intentions by perhaps NOT shooting certain people trying to save the world. I dunno, just a suggestion. (Especially Legolas and Frodo: they're much to hot to die.) Please, for the sake of all the lovesick girls out there (such as myself) spare them.
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Dear Flabby,
I speak as an annoyed orc of Mordor. My problem is that in every battle scene, the orcs get their heads cut off, and the human protagonists always survive! It's quite bad enough that we look like a pregnant mother of seven in the morning before her coffee. (The expression, I mean, not the femininity.)
Quite frankly, I'm tired of being always on the side of the bad guy! Hey, dude, we're just doing out job! I just wish people would give us more credit. Whenever an orc gets shot, the viewers feel good. Do you have any idea how offensive this is?
Thank you for getting my views out to the public.
~Tired-Of-Antagonist-Discrimination
Dear Antagonist,
I honestly believe you have some valid points here, but is this what all orcs think?
However, it would be great for you to show your good intentions by perhaps NOT shooting certain people trying to save the world. I dunno, just a suggestion. (Especially Legolas and Frodo: they're much to hot to die.) Please, for the sake of all the lovesick girls out there (such as myself) spare them.