The most noticeable thing about Delphi was the crowd. Zim ducked being hit in the head with a caped alien's flailing cape as he followed Tak and Skoodge through the commotion. The two had their arms linked and were leaning on one another, heads gently touching. A more disgusting display of public affection Zim could not bring to mind.
"If it bothers you, stop following us," Tak had retorted when he'd mentioned it, then she'd wrapped her arm around Skoodge's middle and sauntered off in step with him. Grudgingly, Zim had followed. It was better than being lost in a crowd of strangers in a world that had lost its mind, but not by much.
Zim paused for just a moment as they passed a gathered crowd of aliens surrounding another Irken. He was taller than Zim, with red eyes that time had dulled. His skin was an unhealthy, half-starved shade of faded green. His short black antennae hung limply by the sides of his head, as washed out as his faded black robe. The only thing about him that still seemed alive was the way in which he spoke, flailing his arms wildly about in the air as he lectured on the virtues of giving up sin to follow the way of the laser.
"Crazy preachers," someone muttered, nearly stepping on Zim as they walked away in disgust. He let out an involuntary squeak, causing them to jump backwards in surprise before he skittered off after Tak and Skoodge. They really didn't seem to care if he followed them or not, making him more cautious for the rest of their trip through the winding slums.
Zim rubbed his arms. Even through the cheap blue uniform the fabric seemed too thin to protect him from the layers of dust and grease. Maggots crunched beneath his feet as he stepped through the alleyways, old laundry dripping water threateningly towards his oversized head.
Tak and Skoodge paused in front of a dirty, broken-down building labeled "Tain's Alchemy." Zim wrinkled the center of his face in disgust. Alchemy was an old science, long debunked by modern technology. Only those who were still trapped in the relics of the past followed its ideals. Tak lifted up a half-shredded blue curtain and gestured him inside.
A moderately sized Irken with multiple antennae piercings stood from a worn wooden stool to bow gently to them. His hands and face bore the proud wrinkles of age. His long fingers had become more claws than fingers over time. His uniform opened at the throat, exposing more of his tattooed chest than Zim cared to see. He turned his face away, studying the floor.
"Tak, Skoodge. Who is this stranger?" he asked. Standing up straight, the tips of his antennae brushed the ceiling of the hovel shop.
"His name is Zim. We found him on the Massive. He seems a little…" Tak let her words drift off and made a gesture that Zim caught. Fortunately for her, he didn't understand it, but he had an idea that it generally meant crazy.
"Well, well, Zim. Little Invader Zim, no less."
Zim's crimson eyes brightened, filling with sparkles. Finally, someone recognized his greatness as an Invader. "Yes, yes I am," he said proudly. "You know of the greatness that is ZIM?"
"I know that Zim does not belong in this world," Tain answered. "You don't exist here."
"Don't exist?" Zim asked, incredulous. "I'm standing right here."
"There was an accident, was there not? A mistake?"
"Zim does not make mistakes," Zim snorted.
"No, but something green and fuzzy does. My visions were not clear enough to determine what it was."
"GIR!" Zim shouted, pounding a cracked table with his gloved fist. "When I get back, he's going to be in such deep trouble."
"Get back to your own universe? And how do you plan on doing that, my Invader?" Tain asked, rubbing his chin.
"I… I just will. Zim's great brainmeats can solve any problem, no matter how big the obstacles against him may seem."
"You have to kill Spork."
Tak and Skoodge gasped in surprise. Zim had been too busy thinking about how great he was to catch the statement. "Eh?" he asked.
"You have to kill Spork."
"Kill… Spork…?" Tal asked, her voice trembling. "Kill the almighty tallest?"
"You did it in your own universe, is that not correct?"
"It wasn't my fault!" Zim snapped angrily back. "The other smeets let my pet out so they could watch me have to run after it. If they hadn't been teasing me, Spork never would have gotten eaten!"
"In this world, you didn't exist, so he didn't get eaten. That's why he's currently ruling over the Irken Empire, defiling it with his shameful presence. He ordered every Irken male within three feet of his height to be executed, and any female within a half-foot. It's only because of Violet that any managed to escape."
"Violet?" Zim squeaked. "I thought she was bad!"
"She puts on that illusion, and we can't risk letting on that we know the truth about her. We can't put her in danger since she's the most powerful inside operative we've got. We all know she'll kill us if she needs to in order to keep her secret, because any one life is not as important as the things she does."
"Huh?" Zim asked.
"She saves lives, Zim. She's smuggled hundreds of Irkens out of the death row torture chambers. The fact that the resistance to Spork still thrives is a tribute to her proficiency."
"And now that Zim has arrived, we have the means to bring about a victory for the revolution," Tain declared, standing up. "Zim, you must unite the twin tallests from your world in this world and kill Spork. He must die by your hand, Zim, or both worlds will be altered beyond repair. You'll never be able to get home."
Zim paused for a moment, then broke into gut-bursting laughter. "I can't believe you guys think I'm going to believe you," he choked, wiping away a tear of laughter from his right eye. "ZIM is not so easily fooled."
"Is that right, Zim? How do you explain the things you see, then? Spork is alive, your tallests are scattered somewhere in the universe, and no one even so much knows what an Invader is. How do you explain this? A dream? It's no dream, Zim. We can help you. We want Spork dead as much as you want to return to your own universe."
Zim paused in the doorway, pausing to look back. "Zim needs no help," he hissed, breezing out the door.
Tak moved to stop him, but Tain put out an arm. "What are you doing? We need him to stop Spork!" she argued.
Tain shook his head slowly. "He'll come back to us of his own accord once he realizes how little he belongs in this world."
Zim trudged through the swirling masses of bodies. He looked straight ahead, not deviating one bit from a straight line back to the docking bays. There had to be some mistake. A dream? No, it was too real to be a dream. He'd figure things out. He was Zim. He was amazing. If he really were in another universe, he'd get back to his own without any help from a pair as hideous as Tak and Skoodge.
A large, furred creature bumped into him, sending the tiny body of Zim falling backwards through the crowd. He flailed his arms, reaching out for anything. Long, spindly green fingers attached to scar-covered hands caught him, steadying him on his feet.
The tall red-eyed Irken in the priests' robe knelt down so that their faces were of near equal height. "Are you all right? You have to be careful in these crowds, small one," the priest said gently.
"I can take care of myself," Zim answered, looking away.
"My child, no one can take care of themselves. That is why we look to the divine laser for protection and answers," the priest answered, not at all put off by Zim's rudeness. He was more than used to it in his conversion trips. Aliens, it seemed, were no more open to being told the things they enjoyed were sending them to hell than humans were.
"Divine… laser?" Zim asked, looking up at the taller Irken and squinting. If… the robe were different… something in red with black accents… "Can I see your ID pak?" he asked.
The priest suddenly stood up and backed off, the flickering lights reflecting in his eyes making his eyes seem to twitch. "You're one of Sporks', aren't you?" he asked, his voice soft.
"No." Zim answered. "Spork is no friend of Zim's. But you're… within three feet of Sporks' height?"
The priest Irken looked away from Zim. After what seemed like an eternity of frozen silence among the milling crowd, he answered so quietly that Zim had to read his lips. "Yes," he whispered.
"Your name…" Zim asked. "Is your name… Red?"
The Irken looked down at him, squinting one of his eyes. "Do I… do I know you?"
"You don't, but you did," Zim answered.
Tain laughed. The tall Irken wasn't able to stand up to his full height inside the shop. He looked about nervously, muttering under his breath about pagan icons the whole while. Tain seemed oblivious to the priest's hateful mutterings.
"Do you believe us now, Zim?"
"I'm not sure I believe anything," Zim answered, taking a sip of the soda Tain had offered. At least soda in this world still tasted the same as his home universe.
"So, are you with us, Red?" Tain asked.
"I… kill Spork? I barely escaped the Empire with my life the first time. What makes you think it can be done? He has hundreds of guards. No," he said, shaking his head. "It can't be done. He will doom the Irken Empire, and I don't want any part of it!" Red stood up sharply, hitting his head on the ceiling and letting out a wail of unhappiness, rubbing the sore spot.
"We need your cooperation to save the Empire," Tak begged, jumping forward and grasping the worn hem of his robe. "Please, please help us."
"I… I don't know… I don't want to die."
"Are you afraid of finding out the heaven you preach of doesn't really exist?" Tain taunted, drawing glowering looks from Red.
"I have absolute faith in the divine protection of the laser."
"You believe that it will always guide your path? Then, do you think it was accident that of all the Irkens you should happen to catch falling, it would be the one who would lead you too your destiny?"
"Arguing my own religion against me won't work," Red snapped back, his antennae standing straight back. His left hand was rolled into a twitching fist. "I'm leaving."
He got as far as pulling back the curtain before he paused, turning back around. "If I help you, if we really could succeed… I could save others from my fate?" he asked. "And I would be… the tallest? What I would say would go? I would rule an entire Empire, all its people? I could have anything I wanted?"
"Yes, you could. But if you were a just ruler, you'd know the difference between what you wanted and what was right for your people," Tain argued.
"I could save their souls?" he asked eagerly. Zim, Tak, and Skoodge all fell over in surprise at the blatant comment. "I would… I would have enough to eat? I'd be warm and safe?"
"You'd have all those things." Tain argued.
"All the snacks you could eat!" Skoodge threw in. Hell, he knew his priorities.
Red took another step down the stairs. "Everyone dies sometime. If we have faith, we have no reason to be afraid." He paused and took a deep breath. "I'll help you."
"Great!" Zim cried. "See? Zim is indeed amazing. He has found the first tallest already."
"Just because this was easy, don't assume finding the other tallest will be. We don't even know where to start looking. This was an accident," Tak cautioned.
"No accident. It is the will of the laser!" Red threw in. Everyone simply stared at him, wondering how much longer he could keep that up. It was getting old pretty fast.
"All right, priest, does the laser tell you where to find Purple?"
"The laser works in mysterious ways," he answered sharply.
"Where are some likely places the other tallest might have run to? What did he like?" Skoodge asked, turning to Zim.
Zim rubbed his chin. "Well, he certainly liked me. Wouldn't be surprised if I was his favorite Invader. They were always throwing parties for me. They even let me drive the Massive once!"
The others looked impressed. "He was always quieter than my tallest Red. He liked submarine sandwiches and soda. Smoke machines, he really liked smoke machines."
"Smoke machines?" snorted Red.
"Yeah, you two were always arguing about that in my world as well." Zim responded.
"Smoke machines, silence, submarine sandwiches, and soda. That's not much to go on. Can you think of anything, anything else that would help us?" Tak asked, making a note on her electronic notepad.
Zim thought for a good five minutes while the others simply watched him. "Well, supposedly he really, really liked…"
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To Be Continued
Uncolored Image of Violet
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