Ch2. Misery and futility
Authors notes: Took me some time, sorry. For those who responded, thanks, and keep them coming. This is R for language.
Side note, with spelling and grammar: I am dyslectic, sorry about the errors that no doubt permeate this page. I am trying my best( a bit twoish). And thank you for taking the time to read it.
Let's do it
Disclaimer, Don't own, not mine...
= thoughts
____= POV change
That night there was a conference, open to the public, to be held at the University. This conference was being held to discus the dark gundam, it's abilities, and what went wrong. There were several guest speakers, including Dr. Kashu. Every gundam fighter had been issued an invitation, when and where.
John didn't want to go to this, stupid thing. He had wasted nearly 4 years, working on the mathematics, and metaphysics of what had actually happened. And he was sick of it. For his ideas, he had been shun by almost every other mathematician and scientist. He had been called everything, form idiot to anarchist. What was worse, he was wrong. He had found it a year ago, a fundamental flaw in his equation. And that was why he had been left. He had lost his faith, completely, in himself. When Canada offered him this, he would have said no. People are such a waste of time and energy, and it is all so pointless, death is all that there truly is, so why bother with life? But the man he was training under, had told him to go, and he had obeyed. He did it not out of respect or admiration, not cause he had something to prove, not cause he had wanted to, but because it was the corse of least resistance. 'If I have to live, I may as well make it as painless as possible.'
That was the main reason he was going to the conference, there was no point in arguing with them. He didn't look forward to seeing his former peers, or hearing their dribble. He was going top sit in the back, not talk to anyone, and leave. This was his plain.
John leaned back and looked around. He sat on a bench, in the middle of a shopping district in Tokyo. He was there cause the meaningless noise that a crowd produced, the thousands of irreconcilable realities, each with it's own value system, relaxed him. He thought it strange, to take comfort in that which he hated so. But his life was a paradox, and this seemed a perfectly natural addition. He had the look of a lost child on his face. But it was his eyes that stood out the most, they seemed to be to gaping wounds, oozing with contamination. A closer look would have shown the dying sparks of a once great fire, the last cry, of a long forgotten soul. He stood about 6'1, though was very very thing. He was a professor, and he looked the part, accept for his dress. He had no glasses, tones of messy, greasy, blond hair, jetting out in all directions. He wore flannel pj paints, and a black shirt with white words, reading, ' human file is suffering' Voltaire'. He had on flip flops, and looked more like a druggy, then a champion of a country. The spaced out look in his eyes only added to this.
He came back to his fight today, with Sweden. He had been lucky, they hadn't used the berserk system on her. He was accurately able to predict her moves, mathematically, through probabilities. The joy and wonder of life had long left this man, and in it's place, came probability equations, and meaningless laws. He no longer saw the beauty in things, all that was left was the math. In any case, I won, that one down, 11 to go, he thought, without any hint of pride or wonder, or joy, or arrogance.
He got up and walked to the conference hall. The sun was setting and the hall was already packed. He looked down and saw VIP fighter seats. His was next to Sweden...
fucking wonderful, I don't want to deal with this.... look at her, she is bouncing off the fucking walls. God give me the ability to deal with this. Jeez, you mother fuckers have a sick sense of humor, know that?
At that he moved for his seat. When he arrived, the gaurd checked his card several times, he even had his superior check it. John tolerated this, though it was annoying. Finally he was given the all clear, and resumed his corse, for his seat. He reached his seat
" Could you allow me in?"
" Who are you???" This came from a man in a red cape, to this man's left he saw Raine, his old friends daughter. She was fixed on the stage, and hadn't scene him. The man's voice reflected an strength, that bordered on arrogance.
" I would like to sit down, please alloy me to pass."
" Look, no offence, but this is the fighter section, I think your confused."
John rolled his eyes, and debated weather or not to pull out his gun and shoot his guy, but he decided not to, things would get messy if he did. " I am a representative of Neo Canada, and their fighter, respectively. I would please repeat my previous two requests, sir."
" What?!" This was a cry of confusion, coming from neo sweden, as if she had been pre programed to responded to the words Canada. John was obviously not what she expected.
" You the guy... HAHHAHAHAHAH... You got beat by a weirdo Allenby, sucks for you."
" Domon!!! Dr. Chic, sorry, I didn't see you, how are you!! It is great, come here, let me give you a huge." Raine's mood had changed, instantly, from angry, to almost joyous to see her fathers old friend. He had always been that nutty uncle everyone seems to have, the on who always has an overly priced gift.
" Sorry, Ms. Mekamora, I pass on hugs. It is nice to see you to, you have grown, although that is apparent."
They immediately got up and let him through, he sat down, and spaced out completely, seeming to no longer be in this world.
___________________________________________________________________________
POV Allenby:
She couldn't believe it, she just couldn't believe it. This was the guy who had beat her God, he is a space case, and on top of that, he looks so...weak, man, I would think I could break this guy in two, one handed She glanced at him, but he didn't seem to notice, he was out of it. He struck her as a deranged old hippy relic, and she half expected him to say groovy, or something.
Well, might as well make the most of it, I have been looking for him all day. It was a good idea to switch his sign with Gorge " Hello, what's up, we haven't been introduced, I am Allenby, the fighter you fought yesterday." She said this in her normal, cheerful, happy, mood.
" You mean today, it is not yet 12:00 AM, so it is still today, not tomorrow." He said this stoicly, without bothering to look at her. He really didn't seem to care.
" Of corse, sorry, I am so dumb some times..." She playfully hit her head with her fist. It was a pose that any normal person would have instantly thought to be so cute and even provoking. John didn't seem to notice.
" I won't argue with you, if you say your dumb fine." This was either a poor attempt at humor, or an insult. In any case, his voice remained as cold as ice.
What do you say to that???? God, even the scientists usually react when I do that dumb thing, that got me out of a few meetings, but he... what is up with him? After several seconds, " So... what did you say your name was, again?"
" I didn't, but because you care, it is John, John Chic." same tone and expression.
" Okay.. So Why are you hear John."
" I do as I am told."
" Well, that can be bad" I speak from experience
" No, if I simply obey, then I am not responsible for my actions. Besides, life is easer that way, less variables."
" Yea, but what about Verity? Nothing venture nothing gain, ya know?"
" If you live in a vacuum, nothing can hurt, or help you, but there is no sin. The less I do, the less I do wrong, or incorrectly. Simple."
" Surely there is more to life then..." He moved his head, for the first time, shacking it back and forth. " Well, then whats the point of life?" She asked, not sweetly, or under the pretense of shooting the shit, but cause she wanted to know. This was the most serious she had ever been in public
" It ends, there is no point but that, it ends." At that he turned in his seat so his back was more to her, she got the message, though.
Authors notes: Took me some time, sorry. For those who responded, thanks, and keep them coming. This is R for language.
Side note, with spelling and grammar: I am dyslectic, sorry about the errors that no doubt permeate this page. I am trying my best( a bit twoish). And thank you for taking the time to read it.
Let's do it
Disclaimer, Don't own, not mine...
= thoughts
____= POV change
That night there was a conference, open to the public, to be held at the University. This conference was being held to discus the dark gundam, it's abilities, and what went wrong. There were several guest speakers, including Dr. Kashu. Every gundam fighter had been issued an invitation, when and where.
John didn't want to go to this, stupid thing. He had wasted nearly 4 years, working on the mathematics, and metaphysics of what had actually happened. And he was sick of it. For his ideas, he had been shun by almost every other mathematician and scientist. He had been called everything, form idiot to anarchist. What was worse, he was wrong. He had found it a year ago, a fundamental flaw in his equation. And that was why he had been left. He had lost his faith, completely, in himself. When Canada offered him this, he would have said no. People are such a waste of time and energy, and it is all so pointless, death is all that there truly is, so why bother with life? But the man he was training under, had told him to go, and he had obeyed. He did it not out of respect or admiration, not cause he had something to prove, not cause he had wanted to, but because it was the corse of least resistance. 'If I have to live, I may as well make it as painless as possible.'
That was the main reason he was going to the conference, there was no point in arguing with them. He didn't look forward to seeing his former peers, or hearing their dribble. He was going top sit in the back, not talk to anyone, and leave. This was his plain.
John leaned back and looked around. He sat on a bench, in the middle of a shopping district in Tokyo. He was there cause the meaningless noise that a crowd produced, the thousands of irreconcilable realities, each with it's own value system, relaxed him. He thought it strange, to take comfort in that which he hated so. But his life was a paradox, and this seemed a perfectly natural addition. He had the look of a lost child on his face. But it was his eyes that stood out the most, they seemed to be to gaping wounds, oozing with contamination. A closer look would have shown the dying sparks of a once great fire, the last cry, of a long forgotten soul. He stood about 6'1, though was very very thing. He was a professor, and he looked the part, accept for his dress. He had no glasses, tones of messy, greasy, blond hair, jetting out in all directions. He wore flannel pj paints, and a black shirt with white words, reading, ' human file is suffering' Voltaire'. He had on flip flops, and looked more like a druggy, then a champion of a country. The spaced out look in his eyes only added to this.
He came back to his fight today, with Sweden. He had been lucky, they hadn't used the berserk system on her. He was accurately able to predict her moves, mathematically, through probabilities. The joy and wonder of life had long left this man, and in it's place, came probability equations, and meaningless laws. He no longer saw the beauty in things, all that was left was the math. In any case, I won, that one down, 11 to go, he thought, without any hint of pride or wonder, or joy, or arrogance.
He got up and walked to the conference hall. The sun was setting and the hall was already packed. He looked down and saw VIP fighter seats. His was next to Sweden...
fucking wonderful, I don't want to deal with this.... look at her, she is bouncing off the fucking walls. God give me the ability to deal with this. Jeez, you mother fuckers have a sick sense of humor, know that?
At that he moved for his seat. When he arrived, the gaurd checked his card several times, he even had his superior check it. John tolerated this, though it was annoying. Finally he was given the all clear, and resumed his corse, for his seat. He reached his seat
" Could you allow me in?"
" Who are you???" This came from a man in a red cape, to this man's left he saw Raine, his old friends daughter. She was fixed on the stage, and hadn't scene him. The man's voice reflected an strength, that bordered on arrogance.
" I would like to sit down, please alloy me to pass."
" Look, no offence, but this is the fighter section, I think your confused."
John rolled his eyes, and debated weather or not to pull out his gun and shoot his guy, but he decided not to, things would get messy if he did. " I am a representative of Neo Canada, and their fighter, respectively. I would please repeat my previous two requests, sir."
" What?!" This was a cry of confusion, coming from neo sweden, as if she had been pre programed to responded to the words Canada. John was obviously not what she expected.
" You the guy... HAHHAHAHAHAH... You got beat by a weirdo Allenby, sucks for you."
" Domon!!! Dr. Chic, sorry, I didn't see you, how are you!! It is great, come here, let me give you a huge." Raine's mood had changed, instantly, from angry, to almost joyous to see her fathers old friend. He had always been that nutty uncle everyone seems to have, the on who always has an overly priced gift.
" Sorry, Ms. Mekamora, I pass on hugs. It is nice to see you to, you have grown, although that is apparent."
They immediately got up and let him through, he sat down, and spaced out completely, seeming to no longer be in this world.
___________________________________________________________________________
POV Allenby:
She couldn't believe it, she just couldn't believe it. This was the guy who had beat her God, he is a space case, and on top of that, he looks so...weak, man, I would think I could break this guy in two, one handed She glanced at him, but he didn't seem to notice, he was out of it. He struck her as a deranged old hippy relic, and she half expected him to say groovy, or something.
Well, might as well make the most of it, I have been looking for him all day. It was a good idea to switch his sign with Gorge " Hello, what's up, we haven't been introduced, I am Allenby, the fighter you fought yesterday." She said this in her normal, cheerful, happy, mood.
" You mean today, it is not yet 12:00 AM, so it is still today, not tomorrow." He said this stoicly, without bothering to look at her. He really didn't seem to care.
" Of corse, sorry, I am so dumb some times..." She playfully hit her head with her fist. It was a pose that any normal person would have instantly thought to be so cute and even provoking. John didn't seem to notice.
" I won't argue with you, if you say your dumb fine." This was either a poor attempt at humor, or an insult. In any case, his voice remained as cold as ice.
What do you say to that???? God, even the scientists usually react when I do that dumb thing, that got me out of a few meetings, but he... what is up with him? After several seconds, " So... what did you say your name was, again?"
" I didn't, but because you care, it is John, John Chic." same tone and expression.
" Okay.. So Why are you hear John."
" I do as I am told."
" Well, that can be bad" I speak from experience
" No, if I simply obey, then I am not responsible for my actions. Besides, life is easer that way, less variables."
" Yea, but what about Verity? Nothing venture nothing gain, ya know?"
" If you live in a vacuum, nothing can hurt, or help you, but there is no sin. The less I do, the less I do wrong, or incorrectly. Simple."
" Surely there is more to life then..." He moved his head, for the first time, shacking it back and forth. " Well, then whats the point of life?" She asked, not sweetly, or under the pretense of shooting the shit, but cause she wanted to know. This was the most serious she had ever been in public
" It ends, there is no point but that, it ends." At that he turned in his seat so his back was more to her, she got the message, though.