Booya!
Jack *talking to programmer*: Ah, c'mon I wanna see Caitsith being beaten up s'more!
Programmer: I'm sorry, but we just can't have his sorry face on this network again. The rating went down so much when we did.
Jack: Really? That much?! Even with SEPHIROTH there?!
Programmer: *nods*
Jack *mumbling*: Those cheap...
Programmer: Well, we can have something else that may bring it up.
Jack: What?
Programmer: See, the network planned on having a Badass fight, seeing how it might pull this sorry show out of the water.
Jack *gasps*: Can we say that?!
Programmer *shrugging*: A reviewer said it so it should be good enough.
Jack: YIPPEE! Oh..*ahem*...well, better be off then! *Frolics away in joy to her seat in the stadium arena.* HEY EVERYONE WE'RE-- *looks around, seeing that barely anyone was there. Looks over to Ansem, who was asleep and cobwebs all over him. She slaps him, making him come awake* Hey, where is everyone?
Ansem: Well, we haven't done this in a while, so I guess they took a bathroom break.
Jack *slapping forehead*: Two-thirds of the stadium?!
Ansem: Maybe...
Jack: You're an idiot.
Ansem: Your the worst announcer ever!
Jack *gasping again*: NOOOOOO!!!!!! DIE, EVIL TRAITOR! *grabs Almighty Fryingpan, Whacking him out of the stadium ceiling.* Hmm...so who's going to be my new announcer. I know! Riku!
Riku *suddenly appearing in Ansem's place*: What the...?
Jack: HI!
Riku: AHH!!!! NOT ANOTHER ONE!!!!!
Jack: No, no, I'm not one of those kind of fangirls.
Riku: Oh so your author's not gonna...
Jack: Nope! You're straight!
Riku *sighing in relief*: Thank god...
Jack: You're my new announcer, Riku! So, introduce the newest fight!
Riku: Alright! *reading q-card* Are next fight is the Badass fight! *whispering over to Jack* Can we say that?
*crowd suddenly rushes back to their seats, hearing this and beginning to cheer like before*
Jack: Guess so! And so, our challengers are, of course, Sephiroth, Auron, and Laguna! *stares over when they don't enter, reading signs*
Laguna: 'Gone fishin', back soon.'
Auron: 'Gone hunting, back soon..'
Sephiroth: 'Gone crazy, back soon...'
Jack: Ah, cheeze, can't we get any good people on this show anymore?!
Riku: Wait, there's another match! It's Heidegar vs the Flying Monkey's from the Wizard of OZ!
Jack: WHAT?!
Riku: I'm only reading what it says. But okay, let THIS fight begin!
Heideger: HYAR HYAR HYAR!!!! This is a joke, right?!
Monkey: I HATE that horse laugh! *grabs something from the pile of crap they had made earlier, (and yes, it is a pile of CRAP, crapola, Shiznit...) Throws it at Heideger, giving him the bubonic plague, (or black plague...whatever you wan to call it.)*
Heideger: NO! Not the black plague! the uncleanness...eww...HYAR HYAR! *gets out Mako gun* Die, stupid rabid monkeys!
Monkeys: *fling crap at the gun, making it blow up, and soon throwing it at his face.*
Heideger: AHHH!!!! I'm melting! MELTING!!!! *the guy DOES melt until he turns into a puddle of water*
Jack: Don't ask...no body ask...But the Monkeys win.
Monkey *celebrating*: OOHOOHOOHOOHAHAHAH!!!! *they fly out of the stadium*
Jack: This just suggests never ask for a army of rabid flying monkeys...'cuz you'll get it...ANYWAY, that's it for this session of Final Deathmacth, and please review to what we should do next!
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A/N I don't own the Wizard of OZ...and frankly don't WANT to...That changing color horse is just odd...IN EVERY SCENE IT'S DIFFERENT! IT'S JUST TOO MIND BOGGLING!!!!