Well another case of my typing faster than thinking, the "," was supposed
to be a "." *growls* because she just spent ten minutes explaining what
"goth" is some one. The next few chapters may seem like I hurried them but
this is how I planned things to go. Don't hate me, though you just might
afterwards.
Miya- *just grins*
Ewunia- we'll see what happens in the happy ending department.
Kard- It's alcohol that has opium and two different kinds of poison in it.
It's been blamed for everything from hallucinations, to strange sex, to
murder.
Icegal- have another fic up called "Fade" you might like it if you like the
writing style of this one.
Chami- no, maybe later.
The lyrics at the beginning and the end are from Stabbing Westward- "Torn"
IF anyone's interested there's a Kenshin MV floating around IMesh that some
one did to this song. It features the scene between Kenshin and Saitoh,
VERY well done, and not just because Chris Hall (lead singer) is god of
vocals.
Touched
---I know I should have told you, I was so afraid you'd leave. And now there's nothing left to say, Well nothing that you'd believe. I never meant to hurt you, With the things I couldn't say. I promise you tomorrow, While denying you today. These lies have torn my world apart---
Water seared over bare skin, the steam rising from her skin still held his scent. Her skin still remembered his touch, and for as much as her thoughts raged, her skin didn't want to forget the caress. Blue eyes closed, her tears mixing with the hot water as her hands scrubbed viciously at her flesh trying to force away the memory.
Betrayed.
He had betrayed her, and only now did she know the truth. Angrily she turned off the water, her mind forcing images of her fathers face to the surface; then just as forcefully memories of his funeral. And now she loved the one person who she should hate, why didn't he tell her. She remembered his eyes, his face when the call came.
*** Aoshi's angry voice reached her from the receiver as she lay beside him, fingers twining in his hair, the muffled words knocked the air from her lungs. Retching she lay beside him, arms curled around her stomach as she wheezed for air, the world falling apart in shades of gray. He had killed her father; the phone's words confirmed it. . .he had taken the hit. Amber eyes turned towards her, their depths mirroring her desolation. A tentative hand reached out for her, the same hand that had touched her. . .had held her close to him. And she screamed, pushing backwards against the smooth satin of the sheets, sliding away from him until she was off the bed, back pressed against the wall.
Wild blue eyes met broken amber, the pain of loss already tearing at his insides; its needle-like claws reaching out inside him to scrape metal against his lungs. The pain of loss already a sharp metallic taste in his mouth. "Kaoru . . ." The whisper hung between them, heavy in the suddenly putrid air. "Please-" He never got to finish as she screamed, the sound dragging newly acquired air from her lungs. But it didn't stop, the scream rose again with continued force and new breath as she dropped to the floor, blue eyes fill with more hate and their fiery depths could hold, and it over flowed into scream after scream. Until her voice was raw, and mercifully lost. There were no more tears, the first minutes wrenching all emotion out of her, leaving that cold emptiness that motivates violence.
"How could you. . ." the whisper was a low curse, razors and glass as it fell from a shock whitened face. "Don't you dare touch me." She hissed at his outstretched hand, "Don't ever touch me." Hate give her dignity as she walked away from him, leaving the room.
She remembered grabbing something, anything, which turned out to be one of Kenshin's long coats. Wrapping it around herself she ran from the apartment. Outside the night was still, dead and humid like a waiting summer. Rocks bit into her bare feet, their skin ripped and torn by sharp edges and she ran through streets of insanity and alleyways of delirium, their shadows embracing her as one of their own. One of the worlds many lost, and through that heavy night she found her way back to the dojo. ***
Wide-eyed she stared into the mirror, the slowly bruising marks upon her neck and shoulders a reminder a stiff reminder to her folly. As much as her mind refused to believe it, telling her that she had dreamed everything, stress had done it, and soon he would be knocking on her door, asking if she had made it home all right the night before. But she hadn't come here; she had gone home with him, she had been with him. Heavy headed she started at the clock, 7 pm.
Shaking fingers reached for the phone, she had left the mirror and its mocking images to fester alone in the bathroom. The wide-eyed girl with skin too pale, and blue eyes showing too much white wasn't her. It some one else, a picture of some memory she should forget. Carefully she dialed the numbers, waiting as the electronic ring cut against her ears. Then an answer, and a man's voice on the other line.
"Ensihi." It was a statement, not a question, her voice coming in raw and over worked tones of rasping shispers. "I agree to your terms."
"Kaoru, I'm glad that you have come to your senses, are you feeling alright, you sound like you have a cold.?" When she didn't answer he continued, voice almost hinting at the victory he had just won. "When would you like me to bring the paper work?"
"Tonight." Was all she said and hung up the phone; she didn't owe him a goodbye, he was like every one else, wanting something from her, so why not just give up. Angrily she dressed, a pair of black jeans and a black long sleeved shirt, black for morning. . .black for hiding herself behind a wall of pale powder and dark make-up, black to forget and loose herself in something else. . .black for the death her soul had suffered. As the rain began to slide down the roof, tears of angels against the windows, hallow blue eyes watched the storm.
Water matted red hair, amber eyes glowing from the form of a broken angel. He stood across the street, watching the dojo, a guardian over her home and over her. Anymore there was nothing in his mind; the beast had taken over, his softer side lying sobbing in the corner. But that's how it always was, the beast handled such thing, but now even the beast felt remorse. The rain was the beast's tears, tears he could have never shed even in the beginning.
Amber eyes watched, oblivious to the wet chill that turned unpainted lips a hue of blue, as a black car pulled up to the dojo. Glimpses of white hair and an expensive suit registered slowly, Kaoru was opening the door, inviting the man in. Kaoru, there she was, dressed in black, a painful mirror of his prior self. Like a discarded doll she stood, looking out the door for a mere moment, before closing it and herself inside with the man. The man that Kenshin knew as Enishi Mizutani. Then the scene came together, and revelation doomed heavily on him. She had given up, she was selling the Dojo, and it had been his fault. He had done what the world couldn't, and with a cruel action he couldn't even remember he had broken her. He had followed her through the streets, fearful for her safety and unable to speak to her. A silent shadow was what he had become, hated guardian of all that he had destroyed. With each passing hour of morning, then day and finally this evening whose weather matched his feelings he had stood in the shadows, guarding and forcing his brain to remember. But there was nothing, only a feeling that he knew the place, and this nagging pang that there was something left to do. He couldn't let her do this, couldn't let her give up. Not because of him.
Brown eyes watched Kenshin move towards the dojo, each piece coming together so easily, though next time she would have to be neater. When he vanished into the building's shadows, the red clad woman stepped out from a side street and carefully walked towards the car. Rain bounced harmlessly off a black umbrella, its droplets never given the chance to touch red satin or pale skin. With a slide nod, the drive opened the door for her, helping her inside Enishi's car. "Thank you, Arion." Red lips whispered, their tones mingling thickly with the rain.
Enishi was cut-to-the-chase business, not even blinking at sudden change. Although the emptiness of her blue eyes unnerved him, the same look he had seen in amber so many years ago. But her mental state was none of his concern, and he could hardly be bothered in caring. This was the last step to establishing his life's work, not to mention getting rid of a certain woman.
Kaoru scanned the documents, the wording was precise and complete, the actuation of his offer. Silently she mused that although Enishi was an ass, he at least made good on his word. With a stroke of a pen, and the accompaniment of the rain's song she signed away the past.
"Thank you, and as agreed I have taken full responsibility for the debts, as well as this," He paused, removing an envelope from his pocket, "the $50,000 we agreed on." He set the envelope on the table, rising to leave. "Good luck Miss Kamiya." He offered his hand to her, which she merely stared at as though it was some offending object trust before her.
"Kaoru." A voice like grating steel came from the doorway, "Don't do this, not. . ."and the voice broke as their eyes met; such hate, she should never have been made to feel this.
"Get out, Kenshin. It's too late." Her words came carefully, fighting the half that wanted to run to him, wanted him to tell her everything was all right and she would wake up soon. But this was reality, and reality was pain.
"No-" He began, but was quickly cute off.
"I believe Miss Kamiya asked you to leave." Enishi said, stepping between them. "You dare to show up here after what you did, murder." Enishi hiss through gritted teeth, but his eyes didn't match the venom his voice carried.
"H. . .how. . .how did you know?" Kenshin stammered, stepping back and out through the doorway, the rain fell in cold streams down his face and back. The barest of whispers reaching him as Enishi walked past.
"Because I hired you."
---A darkness grows inside me in fading shades of gray, All the colors of the world are slowly sucked away. I'm sinking ever deeper to a place that's cold and black, I can't believe I've lost you and you're never coming back. These lies have torn my world apart---
Touched
---I know I should have told you, I was so afraid you'd leave. And now there's nothing left to say, Well nothing that you'd believe. I never meant to hurt you, With the things I couldn't say. I promise you tomorrow, While denying you today. These lies have torn my world apart---
Water seared over bare skin, the steam rising from her skin still held his scent. Her skin still remembered his touch, and for as much as her thoughts raged, her skin didn't want to forget the caress. Blue eyes closed, her tears mixing with the hot water as her hands scrubbed viciously at her flesh trying to force away the memory.
Betrayed.
He had betrayed her, and only now did she know the truth. Angrily she turned off the water, her mind forcing images of her fathers face to the surface; then just as forcefully memories of his funeral. And now she loved the one person who she should hate, why didn't he tell her. She remembered his eyes, his face when the call came.
*** Aoshi's angry voice reached her from the receiver as she lay beside him, fingers twining in his hair, the muffled words knocked the air from her lungs. Retching she lay beside him, arms curled around her stomach as she wheezed for air, the world falling apart in shades of gray. He had killed her father; the phone's words confirmed it. . .he had taken the hit. Amber eyes turned towards her, their depths mirroring her desolation. A tentative hand reached out for her, the same hand that had touched her. . .had held her close to him. And she screamed, pushing backwards against the smooth satin of the sheets, sliding away from him until she was off the bed, back pressed against the wall.
Wild blue eyes met broken amber, the pain of loss already tearing at his insides; its needle-like claws reaching out inside him to scrape metal against his lungs. The pain of loss already a sharp metallic taste in his mouth. "Kaoru . . ." The whisper hung between them, heavy in the suddenly putrid air. "Please-" He never got to finish as she screamed, the sound dragging newly acquired air from her lungs. But it didn't stop, the scream rose again with continued force and new breath as she dropped to the floor, blue eyes fill with more hate and their fiery depths could hold, and it over flowed into scream after scream. Until her voice was raw, and mercifully lost. There were no more tears, the first minutes wrenching all emotion out of her, leaving that cold emptiness that motivates violence.
"How could you. . ." the whisper was a low curse, razors and glass as it fell from a shock whitened face. "Don't you dare touch me." She hissed at his outstretched hand, "Don't ever touch me." Hate give her dignity as she walked away from him, leaving the room.
She remembered grabbing something, anything, which turned out to be one of Kenshin's long coats. Wrapping it around herself she ran from the apartment. Outside the night was still, dead and humid like a waiting summer. Rocks bit into her bare feet, their skin ripped and torn by sharp edges and she ran through streets of insanity and alleyways of delirium, their shadows embracing her as one of their own. One of the worlds many lost, and through that heavy night she found her way back to the dojo. ***
Wide-eyed she stared into the mirror, the slowly bruising marks upon her neck and shoulders a reminder a stiff reminder to her folly. As much as her mind refused to believe it, telling her that she had dreamed everything, stress had done it, and soon he would be knocking on her door, asking if she had made it home all right the night before. But she hadn't come here; she had gone home with him, she had been with him. Heavy headed she started at the clock, 7 pm.
Shaking fingers reached for the phone, she had left the mirror and its mocking images to fester alone in the bathroom. The wide-eyed girl with skin too pale, and blue eyes showing too much white wasn't her. It some one else, a picture of some memory she should forget. Carefully she dialed the numbers, waiting as the electronic ring cut against her ears. Then an answer, and a man's voice on the other line.
"Ensihi." It was a statement, not a question, her voice coming in raw and over worked tones of rasping shispers. "I agree to your terms."
"Kaoru, I'm glad that you have come to your senses, are you feeling alright, you sound like you have a cold.?" When she didn't answer he continued, voice almost hinting at the victory he had just won. "When would you like me to bring the paper work?"
"Tonight." Was all she said and hung up the phone; she didn't owe him a goodbye, he was like every one else, wanting something from her, so why not just give up. Angrily she dressed, a pair of black jeans and a black long sleeved shirt, black for morning. . .black for hiding herself behind a wall of pale powder and dark make-up, black to forget and loose herself in something else. . .black for the death her soul had suffered. As the rain began to slide down the roof, tears of angels against the windows, hallow blue eyes watched the storm.
Water matted red hair, amber eyes glowing from the form of a broken angel. He stood across the street, watching the dojo, a guardian over her home and over her. Anymore there was nothing in his mind; the beast had taken over, his softer side lying sobbing in the corner. But that's how it always was, the beast handled such thing, but now even the beast felt remorse. The rain was the beast's tears, tears he could have never shed even in the beginning.
Amber eyes watched, oblivious to the wet chill that turned unpainted lips a hue of blue, as a black car pulled up to the dojo. Glimpses of white hair and an expensive suit registered slowly, Kaoru was opening the door, inviting the man in. Kaoru, there she was, dressed in black, a painful mirror of his prior self. Like a discarded doll she stood, looking out the door for a mere moment, before closing it and herself inside with the man. The man that Kenshin knew as Enishi Mizutani. Then the scene came together, and revelation doomed heavily on him. She had given up, she was selling the Dojo, and it had been his fault. He had done what the world couldn't, and with a cruel action he couldn't even remember he had broken her. He had followed her through the streets, fearful for her safety and unable to speak to her. A silent shadow was what he had become, hated guardian of all that he had destroyed. With each passing hour of morning, then day and finally this evening whose weather matched his feelings he had stood in the shadows, guarding and forcing his brain to remember. But there was nothing, only a feeling that he knew the place, and this nagging pang that there was something left to do. He couldn't let her do this, couldn't let her give up. Not because of him.
Brown eyes watched Kenshin move towards the dojo, each piece coming together so easily, though next time she would have to be neater. When he vanished into the building's shadows, the red clad woman stepped out from a side street and carefully walked towards the car. Rain bounced harmlessly off a black umbrella, its droplets never given the chance to touch red satin or pale skin. With a slide nod, the drive opened the door for her, helping her inside Enishi's car. "Thank you, Arion." Red lips whispered, their tones mingling thickly with the rain.
Enishi was cut-to-the-chase business, not even blinking at sudden change. Although the emptiness of her blue eyes unnerved him, the same look he had seen in amber so many years ago. But her mental state was none of his concern, and he could hardly be bothered in caring. This was the last step to establishing his life's work, not to mention getting rid of a certain woman.
Kaoru scanned the documents, the wording was precise and complete, the actuation of his offer. Silently she mused that although Enishi was an ass, he at least made good on his word. With a stroke of a pen, and the accompaniment of the rain's song she signed away the past.
"Thank you, and as agreed I have taken full responsibility for the debts, as well as this," He paused, removing an envelope from his pocket, "the $50,000 we agreed on." He set the envelope on the table, rising to leave. "Good luck Miss Kamiya." He offered his hand to her, which she merely stared at as though it was some offending object trust before her.
"Kaoru." A voice like grating steel came from the doorway, "Don't do this, not. . ."and the voice broke as their eyes met; such hate, she should never have been made to feel this.
"Get out, Kenshin. It's too late." Her words came carefully, fighting the half that wanted to run to him, wanted him to tell her everything was all right and she would wake up soon. But this was reality, and reality was pain.
"No-" He began, but was quickly cute off.
"I believe Miss Kamiya asked you to leave." Enishi said, stepping between them. "You dare to show up here after what you did, murder." Enishi hiss through gritted teeth, but his eyes didn't match the venom his voice carried.
"H. . .how. . .how did you know?" Kenshin stammered, stepping back and out through the doorway, the rain fell in cold streams down his face and back. The barest of whispers reaching him as Enishi walked past.
"Because I hired you."
---A darkness grows inside me in fading shades of gray, All the colors of the world are slowly sucked away. I'm sinking ever deeper to a place that's cold and black, I can't believe I've lost you and you're never coming back. These lies have torn my world apart---