Disclaimer: I don't own them except for the kids!

Out of Control, Part 19

They sat facing each other over the smooth surface of the glass table. An umbrella overhead provided shade from the midday sun. Trickles of moisture slipped down the sides of their glasses, as they glanced uncertainly at each other. Fifteen minutes had passed and no words had been spoken as of yet.

"So…"

"So…"

"Could you tell me why we got involved in this whole competition thing to begin with?" Randy asked as she raised her cobalt eyes to Veronica's sapphire blue. "Because to tell you the truth, I don't know what made us do it in the first place."

With a snort, Veronica picked up her glass and stirred the iced tea. "I think we attribute that we have competitive spirits and our pride is bigger than our common sense put together. You hate to lose to me and I hate to lose to you."

"But who even lost to who to begin with. This whole thing started so long ago, I've kind of lost sight of what the hell we were trying to prove to the other," she said as she tucked a strand of her midnight hair behind one ear. "Granted, that we both got competitive spirits and too much pride, it still doesn't answer my first question."

"To be honest, Randy, I don't know either. It was probably some childish and petty thing, which the both of us took to extreme. All it did was get worse as we got older. If you were the better student, it meant that I had to be too. If you excelled in sports, I had too as well. And boys…well, that's something that brought out the meanness in the both of us."

"Why did you sleep with him, Veronica? I mean, if he didn't love you and you knew that, why did you?"

"Because he was infatuated with you. I know it sounds like a silly reason, but I was jealous. I wanted to erase you from his memory, but it didn't work. Not in the way that I thought it would. You had an odd way of creeping into his subconscious."

Randy blinked a few times. "How was I seeping into his subconscious?"

"That first time, he whispered your name when he slept. I heard him."

That made the other girl blanch. "Eww. That's something I was probably better off not knowing."

Veronica ran her finger around the edge of her glass. "It was a shocker, believe me. I thought after we had just done the most intimate thing two people could do, I would be first in his mind, but it backfired on me.  He was thinking of you and that…that pissed me off."

"Is that why you started sleeping around with all those other guys? Because Bobby said my name?"

"Partially, I suppose, but it became much more than that. For a long time, I was the one getting all the attention from boys and all of a sudden, you show up with a brand new body and all the boys that had drooled over me, started doing it over you. It just became an extension of our competition, and when it became clear that I couldn't compete with you in the normal way…"

"Sleeping with them became the only way to beat me because you knew I wouldn't sleep around," Randy finished dryly. She frowned. "And you didn't care if people knew either. You know how much it hurt him to see you do that to yourself."

Veronica whipped her head up and stared at the raven-haired girl across from her. "Hurt him?"

"Vaughn. It killed him to see you do that to yourself. Ver, the boy was so infatuated with you it tore his heart out. But every time I tried bringing it up, you and I would end up getting into an argument about it. You would tell me to mind my own business and Vaughn and Donavon had to go around more than once and tell guys to back off of you or else. Don't tell me you didn't know?"

"I knew."

"Then why in the hell did you keep on doing it? You knew he talked and yet you didn't do anything about it. Even I tried to stem the flow of rumors about you in school, but they kept on spreading. What the hell were you thinking, Ver?"

"I don't know! Maybe I was looking for attention; maybe I was looking for someone to care about me the way that Vaughn cared about you! He was infatuated with you too, Randy. He looked at you with complete adoration in his eyes and I wanted someone to look at me the same way!" Veronica burst out, setting down her glass with an audible clatter. "The two of you were always whispering to each other, holding on to the others hand, and going out and having fun. And the both of you were doing this without sleeping with each other."

"We've kissed, Veronica. That got you all fired up about him and me in the first place. And you flew off the handle about it like you do in every situation. When it comes to screaming first and asking later, you're the perfect candidate."

"Did you love him?" Veronica flung back.

A shocked expression came over Randy's features. "Did I love Vaughn? Yes, I suppose on some level I did. No more than he was with me. We showed each other what love could be like. We also showed each other what true lust was as well, but what does that have to do with anything?"

"It has to a lot to do with everything, Randy. You've played the innocent virgin for so long, it's hard for people to think of you any other way, but since what went on between Vaughn and you, it's made the others talk. You go on and on about me playing fast and loose, but you're just as bad as I am, if not worse. You tease and never give it away, and you make out like you know everything when you don't. I saw what you did to Miles. You tied that boy into so many knots, it's a wonder he didn't jump you despite that damn ring of yours. And you got pleasure out of knowing that he couldn't have his hands all over you."

"In other words, I'm the whore with no conscience, and you're the misunderstood one with a conscience," Randy snapped, crossing her arms.

"I didn't call you a whore, Randy. I'm just saying you were a tease and that's just as bad as being an undiscriminating whore like I was."

"You're not a whore, Veronica."

"Aren't I? I've slept with six guys, got pregnant by one of them, and I'm twenty years old. I allowed them to use me anyway they liked. I think even you would be shocked by some of the things I did. So, I think that qualifies me as being a whore," Veronica replied, as she looked out across the lawn. "I was looking for something that I thought I could find in them, but I didn't. What I wanted was infatuated with you and I didn't even know it."

"You're not a whore, so don't make me repeat it. I never thought that, but others did. I couldn't stop Chris' opinion about it any more than Victoria could. Jonathon and David were too nice to say anything about you. Most of us didn't say a thing because you were one of our own. Vaughn had a crush on you at fourteen. It continued and I kept on prompting him to do something about it, but he kept on saying, not until you were ready. He was playing the gentleman and it got him nowhere," Randy pointed out, as she leaned back in her chair. "I gave him a piece of advice once, but he didn't do anything with it."

"And that advice was?"

"If you want something, take it. Damn the consequences because if you don't do it now, you're going to wonder if you missed out on something wonderful, that's worth taking the risk. He's always been so concerned about your welfare that I wanted to shake him and say, "Just do it." But he wouldn't because he was too stubborn and being too nice."

"And how about now? Would he take that kind of advice?"

"My response would be a no because he seems to think that you don't want him near you. He's giving you the time you need to get better. He called me that day and all he could talk about was you. He was out of his mind because all he could feel inside of him was you. Every little bit of your emotions was transmitted to him. Vaughn was near tears at one point because he described the pain that you were feeling. It had me in tears, Veronica. And there was nothing I could do for him because of it," Randy replied her eyes misting over as she looked into the sapphire ones once again. "The boy was so distraught, he cried for nearly ten minutes."

Tears welled up in Veronica's own eyes from Randy's description. It had almost slipped her memory that he could feel everything she was. And if the pain was debilitating to her, it had been just as bad for him. "I didn't know that…I didn't know that at all. He's gone through all of that for me?"

"Ver, I don't know how plainly I can say this, but he's in love with you. He's so blinded by it; it makes him oblivious to everything else around him. But he's like Donavon, which means he rather suffer without telling you how he feels, rather than to come out and admit it. It must be that Bloom blood of his," the younger girl sighed ruefully as she looked into the eyes of the girl she had considered one of her closest friends since babyhood. Veronica had been the one she would talk to when she couldn't tell Donavon or Vaughn. They went out together and have fun at the local dance clubs, dancing, gossiping, and drinking till the early morning hours. Then came the incident with Donavon. She had never known that Veronica had liked him that much and that their breakup had really burned her. The nasty barbs started to come, and she started to retaliate, but she didn't completely understand why. It was like the things that they shared became non-existent and all that was between them was a rivalry that had always been there. "And I wish you could have heard him, Ver. Let him back in. You need him, I know that you do. And forgive him. He's gone through so much punishment lately. He's taken the heat for me and for loving you. Donavon gave him a broken nose."

"He what!"

"Donavon gave him a broken nose. Well according to him, after he made it very uncomfortable for me to sit down for a few days, told me that you had told him what went down between you, Vaughn, and myself. He lost his temper; nearly beat the shit out of his cousin, for you…and for having his hands on me. Vaughn came away with a bloody, broken nose."

Veronica paled. She had known that telling Donavon would have some dire consequences, but never in a million years would she had thought he would break his own cousin's nose. She knew he had a temper, but it always was kept under wraps, but she knew she had inadvertently sparked it that day. "I didn't know that either," she said softly.

Randy could see the distressed look on her friend's face. "He's a bit better now. The spots under his eyes don't look so black anymore, but his nose is still swelled the tiniest bit," she said, trying to reassure the other girl. "Although, I can tell when he tries to smile, it doesn't completely cover up the pain mirrored in his eyes. Veronica, you have to let him in. You have to let him see you and talk to you. This whole mess has gone on long enough and you know it."

"I don't think my dad wants him near me right now," she said as she absently toyed with a hangnail. "He's been trying to keep my from getting upset over things because he feels so guilty. He won't say so, but I know its because he couldn't do a thing to help me and he didn't do anything to stop my behavior. Dom is also staying around me a lot too. Me being sick like I was scared the hell out of him. He's always needed someone to protect and I was it. He said it was because Victoria never needed him to protect her, but with me being younger…he felt like it was his duty. Don't get me wrong, I love both of them very much, but I don't know how much more I can stand of this."

"Well you have to do something before Vaughn implodes, because that's exactly what's happening to him. And talking to him over a vid phone is the only thing I can do since Donavon won't allow him within reaching distance."

The blond frowned and started chewing on her thumbnail. It was a habit she had acquired in childhood when she was upset about something. She hadn't been able to break it. "I guess the only thing I can do is tell my dad I want to see Vaughn. I mean I've been talking to Quatre for the past week, and it has helped, but…"

"You need him. But if you're dad is anything like mine, which he is, he will fight you on this. And believe you me, there's no guilt tripping them into doing what we want in this kind of situation," Randy said with a snort as she took a sip of her drink. She looked back up at the other girl, who was lost in thought again, nibbling on her nail again. Running a finger around the edge of her glass, she cast a look out towards the lawn. "And I've been meaning to ask you, about how you've been feeling, Ver, but your dad wasn't too keen on having me see you either."

Veronica looked up again. Those cobalt eyes of Randy's were telling. A slight smile touched her lips. "I'm feeling much better now. Notice that I don't have my brother shadowing me."

"When I heard, Ver, it scared the hell out of me. Donavon came over that day and told me. I started crying, which is something I don't do very often, but I felt horrible," Randy answered, her eyes welling up with tears again.

The richly hued eyes widened a bit as her friend, her rival, her other "sister" sniffled some more. A choked feeling welled up inside of her. "Jeez, Randy, don't cry, or else you're going to make me cry."

Randy sniffed back some more tears. "I can't help it! I was so worried about you; I nearly broke the skin on Donavon's arms. He wouldn't let me clench my fists so I held on to his arms. God, it makes me feel like this is partially my fault that this happened to you."

"It's not your fault, Maxwell. I was the one who unwisely got into a fight with Bobby on the steps. I was the one who took the swing at him and ended up falling down the steps."

"But it's just as well as me pushing you off. If it hadn't been for Vaughn and me that day, if I didn't push your buttons by yelling back at you, you wouldn't have been alone that day, and you wouldn't have fallen and…"

"Miscarried," Veronica said quietly as a few tears slipped down her cheeks. "It's not your fault. I did overreact for something that I know isn't real and for something that happened so long ago, the limitations on it have well expired by the time I exploded at you. Something that happened when we were kids shouldn't have relevance on what's happened now. It's something that we should leave in the past," she explained, her voice steady despite the tears still trickling down her cheeks. "But I was the one who got pregnant because I chose to have sex. I was the one who got in the fight with him and fell. None of that is your fault. It was my own bad judgment."

Wiping the moisture from under her watery eyes, she gave the blond a weak smile. "So, are we apologizing or something?"

"It certainly sounds like we're trying to. You're trying to absolve me of guilt and I'm trying to do the same thing to you. We're both to blame in certain parts of this little melodrama. We took it too far and it nearly ruined our friendship completely. I don't want to lose a friend, who's like another sister to me," she replied as she reached across the table and grasped Randy's hand. "And I'm going to try to see Vaughn and talk to him."

"And like sisters, we will fight like cats and dogs. I'm sorry, Ver. For anything and everything that I've done to you over the years, whether or not it was intentional," the raven-haired girl said as she gripped the other girl's hand. "And be kind to Winner, he's had it rough as of late."

"I will and I'm also sorry as well for things I've done over the years. We let our competition go to our heads. There's nothing for us to prove to the other. You'll always be better at some things than me, just like I will you. I don't think we ever had anything to prove except that we're too much like our parents for our own good."

"Got that right.  Your dad and my dad still are very competitive," Randy snorted as she rolled her eyes.

Veronica smiled. "You think they would've mellowed as they got older."

"Hardly. My dad still likes to make your dad and Wufei fizzle because they're now related by marriage. He takes it as his due to irk them both."

A snort of laughter escaped Veronica's lips. "And our mother's can't make them stop it either."

"Even at the point of a gun!" Randy howled

Soon both girls were doubled over with laughter, trying not to fall out of their respective chairs. Once the laughter died down, both of them looked at each other again. This time happier expressions lit their faces.

Randy pushed out of her chair and sat down next to Veronica. She gave the other girl a hug. "I'm glad we can try to be friends again. I've missed having you around to talk to."

Veronica grinned over the other girl's shoulder. "I know what you mean. I don't have someone to nag about their love life."

"Oh, spare me. I know what you're capable of when you give advice," the younger girl said as she pulled back to look her in the face.

"And you like to nag me on my bad habits," Veronica returned in kind.

"Someone has to tell you not to chew on your nails."

Veronica stuck her tongue out at that remark.

"That's real mature, Veronica."

"So, did you know that Donavon's fantasized about you?"

"Yes, I do know that. I got a brief demonstration after I stopped crying over you."

Pure devilry alighted in sapphire eyes. "And…"

"None of your damn business, Yuy," Randy said primly.

"It must be really good if you're not telling, Maxwell."

"Pain in the ass."

"Bitch."


Both girls stuck their tongues out each other again before bursting out into laughter once again.

A/N: It's here! I know it's been awhile since I've updated this story (cringes from some dirty looks) but it's here and I hope you like it. XOXO!!