This chapter is mainly about what Hermione is feeling. It is an answer to a review I recieved. What people THINK of Hermione and what she is feeling.
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Dear Journal,
The past two days have been really odd. I think Dean wants to get back with me. He has been hanging around alot lately. I don't want to get back with him. I haven't made ANY hint towards him, have I? Why is it that he thinks I will just fall back into his arms? Maybe as a friend, but never as anything else. I didn't kiss him, like Seamus kissed me. I didn't want to kiss him back. Anyone who saw that would probably think I was some kind of slut. I'm not! I don't want to use and abuse guys, they're doing that enough to me.
I realise I haven't written in here since Draco "died." He came back! I should be happy, but its so weird. I know he just wants to run away with me, be with me. I know its the only way. I agreed to it even, because I want to be with him. But I can't get over what he did. He left me and I tried to live my life without him. Then by surprise he flies through my window while Dean is being a "friend." Any girl in my situation should be happy, I mean the love of their life came back! To me it just seems like another example of the use and abuse theory.
Harry and Ron want to be my friends again. Reminding me of all the adventures we had together. But just like Dean, they didn't understand my motives. They ditched me when it hurt the most and made me look like the bad guy. When Dean kissed Parvati before breaking up with me, nobody cared! It was just poor old Dean falling for someone else. Then when I fall for someone else, they spit on me. Because I'm a girl. Because everyone thinks Im a whore.
Hermione shut her diary in tears. She had agreed to running away with Draco two days before, but with Dean constantly on her back, making it so obvious that he still loved her, made her confused and guilty. She wasn't into him, but everyone just assumed she was. Now that Draco was dead, she would get back with him as though nothing had happened. But things did happen. She knew Seamus liked her, they hadn't spoken since they kissed. Draco was still alive and waiting for her, while everyone else was trying to make amends after ditching her.
"I don't even know what I'm doing anymore!" Hermione cried out to the empty dormitory. She was stressed from constantly studying in an attempt to keep her mind off things. She felt as though the answer to all her problems lay in one of the four books in front of her.
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Hermione sat in Charms class. She was next to Dean, Harry and Ron. Parvati and Lavender making cracks about which one was next. Hermione tried to concentrate on doing the charm she had done 100 times before, but her mind was on other things. Especially Draco.
"Hermione, are you okay?" Dean asked from beside her. He was whispering, but it was pointless as Harry and Ron were too busy talking about Quidditch to notice anything.
"I'm fine. Just got things on my mind." Hermione said, trying to shrug him off as he was so close it was making her uncomfortable.
"Want to talk about it? I know Draco's arrival must have upset you but..." Deans hand was holding hers now. Hermione didn't want him too. She shrugged it off, but he grabbed it again. "Please Hermione, talk to me."
"Stop it Dean! Just leave me alone! Why should I discuss anything with you? Because you "love" me? Not when it mattered you didn't! Let go of me!" Hermione yelled out so that the whole room turned around. Dean was staring at her in shock and hurt. Hermione grabbed her books and stormed out of the classroom.
--------------------------------------------------------Up in the Dormitory, Hermione began packing her things. Books, clothes, wands, potions she had practised. Her journal was still tucked under the matress, she grabbed it and began to read about the times she has been with Dean. She ripped them all out and tore them into little bits, before shoving the journal in her bag. She grabbed a piece of paper and wrote a quick note to Draco:
Meet me at my window. I'll be waiting for you. We must leave.
She ran up to the owlery as fast as she could, attatching the note to the first owl she saw, sending it off. She knew Draco would get the note very soon and they could go away. She ran back down to her room, to her things. Looking at her four poster bed, she didn't want to leave Hogwarts, it was like a home to her. All the adventures, memories even though some people hated her, she would still miss the pace. But Draco's offer was too good to refuse. She sat on her bed, lying in it for the last time, falling asleep.
After 1 or 2 hours sleep, Hermione felt some hands shaking her. Waking her up. She couldn't see who it was as her vision was blurry from just waking up.
"Wake up Hermione!" the voice cried. "I can't let you leave Hogwarts, not until you hear what I have to say."
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Next chapter will be up soon. I hope that this chapter made things clear about the person Hermione is in this story.
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Dear Journal,
The past two days have been really odd. I think Dean wants to get back with me. He has been hanging around alot lately. I don't want to get back with him. I haven't made ANY hint towards him, have I? Why is it that he thinks I will just fall back into his arms? Maybe as a friend, but never as anything else. I didn't kiss him, like Seamus kissed me. I didn't want to kiss him back. Anyone who saw that would probably think I was some kind of slut. I'm not! I don't want to use and abuse guys, they're doing that enough to me.
I realise I haven't written in here since Draco "died." He came back! I should be happy, but its so weird. I know he just wants to run away with me, be with me. I know its the only way. I agreed to it even, because I want to be with him. But I can't get over what he did. He left me and I tried to live my life without him. Then by surprise he flies through my window while Dean is being a "friend." Any girl in my situation should be happy, I mean the love of their life came back! To me it just seems like another example of the use and abuse theory.
Harry and Ron want to be my friends again. Reminding me of all the adventures we had together. But just like Dean, they didn't understand my motives. They ditched me when it hurt the most and made me look like the bad guy. When Dean kissed Parvati before breaking up with me, nobody cared! It was just poor old Dean falling for someone else. Then when I fall for someone else, they spit on me. Because I'm a girl. Because everyone thinks Im a whore.
Hermione shut her diary in tears. She had agreed to running away with Draco two days before, but with Dean constantly on her back, making it so obvious that he still loved her, made her confused and guilty. She wasn't into him, but everyone just assumed she was. Now that Draco was dead, she would get back with him as though nothing had happened. But things did happen. She knew Seamus liked her, they hadn't spoken since they kissed. Draco was still alive and waiting for her, while everyone else was trying to make amends after ditching her.
"I don't even know what I'm doing anymore!" Hermione cried out to the empty dormitory. She was stressed from constantly studying in an attempt to keep her mind off things. She felt as though the answer to all her problems lay in one of the four books in front of her.
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Hermione sat in Charms class. She was next to Dean, Harry and Ron. Parvati and Lavender making cracks about which one was next. Hermione tried to concentrate on doing the charm she had done 100 times before, but her mind was on other things. Especially Draco.
"Hermione, are you okay?" Dean asked from beside her. He was whispering, but it was pointless as Harry and Ron were too busy talking about Quidditch to notice anything.
"I'm fine. Just got things on my mind." Hermione said, trying to shrug him off as he was so close it was making her uncomfortable.
"Want to talk about it? I know Draco's arrival must have upset you but..." Deans hand was holding hers now. Hermione didn't want him too. She shrugged it off, but he grabbed it again. "Please Hermione, talk to me."
"Stop it Dean! Just leave me alone! Why should I discuss anything with you? Because you "love" me? Not when it mattered you didn't! Let go of me!" Hermione yelled out so that the whole room turned around. Dean was staring at her in shock and hurt. Hermione grabbed her books and stormed out of the classroom.
--------------------------------------------------------Up in the Dormitory, Hermione began packing her things. Books, clothes, wands, potions she had practised. Her journal was still tucked under the matress, she grabbed it and began to read about the times she has been with Dean. She ripped them all out and tore them into little bits, before shoving the journal in her bag. She grabbed a piece of paper and wrote a quick note to Draco:
Meet me at my window. I'll be waiting for you. We must leave.
She ran up to the owlery as fast as she could, attatching the note to the first owl she saw, sending it off. She knew Draco would get the note very soon and they could go away. She ran back down to her room, to her things. Looking at her four poster bed, she didn't want to leave Hogwarts, it was like a home to her. All the adventures, memories even though some people hated her, she would still miss the pace. But Draco's offer was too good to refuse. She sat on her bed, lying in it for the last time, falling asleep.
After 1 or 2 hours sleep, Hermione felt some hands shaking her. Waking her up. She couldn't see who it was as her vision was blurry from just waking up.
"Wake up Hermione!" the voice cried. "I can't let you leave Hogwarts, not until you hear what I have to say."
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Next chapter will be up soon. I hope that this chapter made things clear about the person Hermione is in this story.