Ok, I'm going to delve back into the head of Travis for most if not all of
this chapter. So its going to be first person like the first two chapters
of the first part. Tell me if ya like it or if ya hate it so I'll know
weather or not to do this again.
-Flameraven
Too paraphrase Mark Twain, the news of my ownership of Digimon has been greatly exaggerated.
Chapter 8.
She was kissing me.
Sara, the girl that gave me my first glimpse of heaven; the reason for my personal hell, was kissing me. It didn't make any sense, she should have been yelling at me, cursing me or trying to kill me.
But she wasn't, she was kissing me. And I was kissing her right back.
That's what got me, I think. I'd never been kissed before. I'd been with girls, fooled around a bit, but I'd never kissed one. The act itself seemed too intimate, too special to do with someone I didn't love and so I never did. And now I find myself in a lip-lock with a girl who by all rights should be out for my blood and I'm loving it. I'm loving her.
God help me, but I'm in love with her.
God help us all if I'm right about what she has become.
The human mind is a interesting thing. I swear I felt mine shut down the moment she walked into the room. All higher brain functions ceased. It was a novel experience to say the least, one that I never wish to go through ever again.
Her lips were like a balm though. It gave me the kick-start I needed and my mind started working at levels I never knew existed. I'm sure I could have told you the meaning of life in that once instant, and I would have been correct too.
I finally, after all these years, understood why Tai and TK do what they do with their respective mates. Why they sacrifice their own happiness again and again. They are bigger men then I. Better men then I will ever be.
I've spent over a decade in real years looked for this, for her. Nearly twelve years searching desperately for a miracle to relieve my guilt. She left me, all those years ago because I was a cowered who couldn't except my fate.
Can you imagine that? The holder of the crest of faith, a child who has been a baptized member of his church, who made public profession of faith by his own free will by the age of seven, as too big a cowered to go home to God?
She went in my stead.
And that was when my brain finally admitted what I had been trying so desperately to deny. Sara was dead, I watched her get deleted with my own eyes, so how could she be here, now, with me?
I wrenched away from the kiss, set on demanding to know how she could be here. At this point I was halfway convinced I had finally gone over the edge and lost my mind completely. The only reason I wasn't sure that was the case was because I was worried I might be insane, and that didn't seem like something an insane person would do.
"Why?" was what came out though. I'm not even sure what I was asking with that question. Why was she kissing me? That was a good one, or perhaps why I had been knocked unconscious. There were a million WHY's that I could have mente and her answer didn't help much.
"Because I wanted too." I nodded my head like a fool, thinking 'thanks love, that was real helpful.' But I wisely kept that to myself. My brain might still have been fried as I was finding out much to my chagrin but I wasn't quite THAT stupid. I felt something though, something that I hadn't let myself feel in a long, long time.
Tears.
I was about to cry. All over the inane statement of 'Because I wanted too.' Of all things. I hadn't cried at the lost of my dog, or my mother or Aunt or Grandmother. I had cried all my tears long ago in the world that I'm now trapped.
Death had become a companion of sorts, it no longer got to me. But now the one who I took that companion from, the one who I cried those tears over, was back and all the pain I had held inside came out.
It was humiliating, and it was refreshing at the same time. Once I was done I felt free, like some burden had been lifted off of me. And it was then, only then that I saw it. My fears confirmed.
God help me, and God help the world. For the women I love is in league with the enemy. The crest around her companions neck. That of a solar eclipse was all I needed to know.
There were legends around this world. Prophesies that even I haven't seen. Nega-destined, anti-destined; things like that are all to common. But then why not? When your saviors have one thing, shouldn't your enemies as well?
Angels and Demons, Viri and Vaccine. Jesus and the Anti-Christ. Hell the light and dark sides of the force. Where there is one, there must be the other. I told Serpentmon all about this.
God I hate being right all the time.
Now all I've got to do is figure out what the hell her crest means...
Tai, her operant opposite... well I think he is her opposite, he has a sun, and she as an eclipse. But his opposite could be the moon or something...
I shook my head to clear it. That kiss must have rattled me bad if I'm babbling in my own damn head. I have to think, have to plan. And I've got to get the hell out of dodge so too speak.
She leaned in to kiss me once again, it didn't have the need of the first one, this was softer, sweeter... but just as addictive.
I've got to get out of here and soon, or I wont want to leave, wont be able to leave. I have to make a chouse. Light or dark, good or evil. It is time I take my first stand since I damned myself.
And I chouse redemption.
The moment her lips left mine this time I opened my mouth to speak. Her slight smile told me she thought she had won. I smiled inwardly at that. I've changed too, in the past eleven years, Sara. I sent my apologies to Patamon before doing what I'm hopping the others will be able to do soon.
Activated my crest.
You see, the crests are not those gems that I gave out, or even mine laying over on that table over there. No, they rest in our hearts. The wave after mine sacrificed that part of themselves. Something I know I could never have done.
My gray aura razed around me, and reached to Patamon. I let him do what he, for so long, couldn't even with TK. His big blue eyes went wide as he felt the barrier that was always there leave him.
As I looked back into the eyes of the woman who had so easily stolen my heart, the one who's loss I had damned my soul over. Those soft green eyes turned to garnets in an instant as she heard what I had done aloud.
"Patamon digivolve too..."
-Flameraven
Too paraphrase Mark Twain, the news of my ownership of Digimon has been greatly exaggerated.
Chapter 8.
She was kissing me.
Sara, the girl that gave me my first glimpse of heaven; the reason for my personal hell, was kissing me. It didn't make any sense, she should have been yelling at me, cursing me or trying to kill me.
But she wasn't, she was kissing me. And I was kissing her right back.
That's what got me, I think. I'd never been kissed before. I'd been with girls, fooled around a bit, but I'd never kissed one. The act itself seemed too intimate, too special to do with someone I didn't love and so I never did. And now I find myself in a lip-lock with a girl who by all rights should be out for my blood and I'm loving it. I'm loving her.
God help me, but I'm in love with her.
God help us all if I'm right about what she has become.
The human mind is a interesting thing. I swear I felt mine shut down the moment she walked into the room. All higher brain functions ceased. It was a novel experience to say the least, one that I never wish to go through ever again.
Her lips were like a balm though. It gave me the kick-start I needed and my mind started working at levels I never knew existed. I'm sure I could have told you the meaning of life in that once instant, and I would have been correct too.
I finally, after all these years, understood why Tai and TK do what they do with their respective mates. Why they sacrifice their own happiness again and again. They are bigger men then I. Better men then I will ever be.
I've spent over a decade in real years looked for this, for her. Nearly twelve years searching desperately for a miracle to relieve my guilt. She left me, all those years ago because I was a cowered who couldn't except my fate.
Can you imagine that? The holder of the crest of faith, a child who has been a baptized member of his church, who made public profession of faith by his own free will by the age of seven, as too big a cowered to go home to God?
She went in my stead.
And that was when my brain finally admitted what I had been trying so desperately to deny. Sara was dead, I watched her get deleted with my own eyes, so how could she be here, now, with me?
I wrenched away from the kiss, set on demanding to know how she could be here. At this point I was halfway convinced I had finally gone over the edge and lost my mind completely. The only reason I wasn't sure that was the case was because I was worried I might be insane, and that didn't seem like something an insane person would do.
"Why?" was what came out though. I'm not even sure what I was asking with that question. Why was she kissing me? That was a good one, or perhaps why I had been knocked unconscious. There were a million WHY's that I could have mente and her answer didn't help much.
"Because I wanted too." I nodded my head like a fool, thinking 'thanks love, that was real helpful.' But I wisely kept that to myself. My brain might still have been fried as I was finding out much to my chagrin but I wasn't quite THAT stupid. I felt something though, something that I hadn't let myself feel in a long, long time.
Tears.
I was about to cry. All over the inane statement of 'Because I wanted too.' Of all things. I hadn't cried at the lost of my dog, or my mother or Aunt or Grandmother. I had cried all my tears long ago in the world that I'm now trapped.
Death had become a companion of sorts, it no longer got to me. But now the one who I took that companion from, the one who I cried those tears over, was back and all the pain I had held inside came out.
It was humiliating, and it was refreshing at the same time. Once I was done I felt free, like some burden had been lifted off of me. And it was then, only then that I saw it. My fears confirmed.
God help me, and God help the world. For the women I love is in league with the enemy. The crest around her companions neck. That of a solar eclipse was all I needed to know.
There were legends around this world. Prophesies that even I haven't seen. Nega-destined, anti-destined; things like that are all to common. But then why not? When your saviors have one thing, shouldn't your enemies as well?
Angels and Demons, Viri and Vaccine. Jesus and the Anti-Christ. Hell the light and dark sides of the force. Where there is one, there must be the other. I told Serpentmon all about this.
God I hate being right all the time.
Now all I've got to do is figure out what the hell her crest means...
Tai, her operant opposite... well I think he is her opposite, he has a sun, and she as an eclipse. But his opposite could be the moon or something...
I shook my head to clear it. That kiss must have rattled me bad if I'm babbling in my own damn head. I have to think, have to plan. And I've got to get the hell out of dodge so too speak.
She leaned in to kiss me once again, it didn't have the need of the first one, this was softer, sweeter... but just as addictive.
I've got to get out of here and soon, or I wont want to leave, wont be able to leave. I have to make a chouse. Light or dark, good or evil. It is time I take my first stand since I damned myself.
And I chouse redemption.
The moment her lips left mine this time I opened my mouth to speak. Her slight smile told me she thought she had won. I smiled inwardly at that. I've changed too, in the past eleven years, Sara. I sent my apologies to Patamon before doing what I'm hopping the others will be able to do soon.
Activated my crest.
You see, the crests are not those gems that I gave out, or even mine laying over on that table over there. No, they rest in our hearts. The wave after mine sacrificed that part of themselves. Something I know I could never have done.
My gray aura razed around me, and reached to Patamon. I let him do what he, for so long, couldn't even with TK. His big blue eyes went wide as he felt the barrier that was always there leave him.
As I looked back into the eyes of the woman who had so easily stolen my heart, the one who's loss I had damned my soul over. Those soft green eyes turned to garnets in an instant as she heard what I had done aloud.
"Patamon digivolve too..."