'I can't believe it's come to this…' The blonde pilot thought to himself. 'Am I really that miserable?'
Quatre was sitting on the railing of a bridge. It was thirty-six degrees out, snowy all around, and wind blowing in every direction. Tears from his aqua eyes stained the boy's childlike face. Over the past week, all of the pilots have been giving him the cold-shoulder. It tore at the blonde's heart.
"Yes…yes I am…" Quatre closed his eyes as more tears flowed down the boy's cheeks.
*Flashback*
"Hey Duo!" The blonde called cheerily.
Duo smiled at the small pilot. "Yo, Q-man. How's it goin'?"
"Great! How 'bout you?"
"Everything's fine and dandy with me."
"You wanna have some tea with me?"
Duo bit his lip. "Uhhhh…Sorry Quatre-man. No can do. I'm gonna go do something with Heero."
"Oh. Okay. Maybe next time."
"Yeah. Next time."
Quatre turned to walk away. He made it into the other room when he remembered that he wanted to ask Duo something. He turned back around to ask him when he overheard Duo saying something to Heero.
"Man, Heero. He asked me to do something with him again. Frankly, I'm tired of making excuses. That guy just needs to know when to leave me alone…"
Quatre's heart dropped. He couldn't believe what Duo had just said. Quatre fled the room and ran to his own room. There, he cried himself to sleep.
*End Flashback*
'Was I really that horrible? Was I really so annoying?'
Quatre sighed. He opened his eyes and looked at the freezing waters, flowing below his feet.
"I guess I was…"
*Flashback*
"Wufei? Can you help me with Sandrock?" Quatre asked the Chinese boy, nicely.
"I'm busy right now, Quatre." Wufei said, sitting in meditation.
"Maybe later?"
Wufei opened his eyes and glared at Quatre. "Dammit Winner. I said I'm busy. Can't you go bother someone else?"
Quatre fought to hold back the rising tears. He nodded and backed away from his fellow pilot. When out of sight, Quatre let his tears go.
*End Flashback*
'Did you all not want me around? Was that it?'
By now, Quatre lost feeling in his limbs and in his cheeks. All he could feel was the aching in his heart.
"Yes…that was it as well…"
*Flashback*
"C'mon you guys! The movie's starting in an hour and we need good parking!" Heero called to Duo, Wufei, and Trowa.
The three came rushing down the stairs to join the forth pilot. Quatre was sitting nearby with a book in his hands.
"You guys are going to a movie?" The blonde asked, turning his attention away from the novel.
"Yeah." Heero said simply.
"Uh, what movie?"
"You wouldn't like it. It's gory and filled with killing everywhere."
The other three nodded.
"And if we don't get a move on, we'll miss the show. See ya later Quatre."
"Yeah…bye…"
The four left Quatre to himself.
'Sure I don't like gore but I still would have like to have gone with them…'
Quatre closed his book and wrapped his arms around his knees, watching the flames dance across the logs in the fireplace, as he felt more alone than he had ever felt in his entire life.
*End Flashback*
'And you…I cared about you the most. And I thought you cared about me, too.'
Quatre felt another piece of his heart tear away at the thought of the one he loved.
"Oh Trowa…"
*Flashback*
"Trowa…can I talk to you?" Quatre said, uneasily standing in the doorway to the brunette's room.
Trowa was sitting on his bed, typing something on his laptop. "Hm."
"Um, is there something going on? Did I do or say something wrong?"
Trowa looked up. "What are you talking about, Quatre?"
"Well…everyone seems to be upset with me, lately. I was wondering if it was something I said or did…"
"Oh come on. You're exaggerating."
"But-"
"Quatre, I'm sure everything is just fine and that you're letting your imagination get the best of you."
"Trowa-"
"Quatre, if you don't mind. I have a paper due and I really need to work on it right now."
The blonde felt a pang in his heart. "Okay…Good night Trowa."
Trowa simply turned back to his laptop.
*End Flashback*
"What did I do? What it something I said? So many questions…"
*Flashback - 1 hour ago*
Dear Trowa, Heero, Duo and Wufei,
Lately it seems that all I've been is a bother to you. You all seem rather upset with me or very short-tempered. All of you have been avoiding me as well. I notice these things. When I enter a room, you stop talking. When I ask you if you want to do something with me, you spout out an excuse. What have I done to deserve this?
To Heero: I know I'm not strong like you are. You are very skilled in all you do and I admire you for that. I apologize for whatever it was that I did. This is my goodbye…
To Wufei: Your determination is what I admire in you. That and your intellect. I know I'll never be as strong-minded as you. I'm sorry for what I did. This is my goodbye…
To Duo: I admire your free spirit. Even when things are looking grim, you always are cheerful. I'll miss your jokes and laughter the most. I'm sorry. This is my goodbye…
To Trowa: Trowa…you mean the most to me. It hurts to know that you aren't pleased with my being. I'm sorry. I love you, Trowa. I always have and I always will. This is my goodbye…
Goodbye…Quatre
*End Flashback*
"This is my goodbye…"
The day was Quatre's birthday. No one even muttered a single word to him. Not even a single glance in his direction. It hurt.
Quatre had honestly thought that the others had cared about him.
'But they don't...'
Not wanting to inconvenience them any longer, Quatre turned to drastic measures.
"No more..."
*Back at the house*
"Man, Heero. You remember that guy that wouldn't leave me alone?" Duo said, intertwining his fingers with the other pilot's.
"Yeah. Isn't his name Tomei?"
"Yeah. Well, he still thinks he's got a chance with me."
"And of course he doesn't." Heero placed a small kiss on his lover's lips. "You're mine."
"Will you two, please stop with the romance? We've got a house filled with guests for Quatre's surprise party just a few miles away. It'd be best to hurry and retrieve the boy so the fun can begin." Wufei huffed.
"Oh come one Wu-man. You're still not pissed about that guy hitting on Sally, are you?"
"Don't you dare bring that up again! I accidentally snapped at Quatre because of that fool."
"You went off on him?" Trowa asked, cocking an eyebrow.
"Yes. I didn't mean to."
"Maybe that's why he thinks you're mad at him." Trowa said, thinking about what Quatre said the night before.
"He thinks I'm angry with him?"
"Yeah. He thinks that we're all annoyed with him. I think he was upset when we went out to that movie without him."
"But we needed to discuss our plans for tonight." Heero said.
"Oh man. I think he might think I'm avoiding him when I told him that I was too busy for him." Duo said, scratching his head.
"Damn…I'll go get him, then." Trowa said.
Trowa began climbing the stairs and walking towards Quatre's room. 'My little one, you'll be so happy after tonight. We will show you how much you really mean to us. And after that, I can tell you how much I love you…'
Trowa opened the door only to find it empty.
"Quatre?" he called out.
The brunette then spotted an envelope on the bed. He pulled out the folded piece of paper and immediately paled.
"GUYS!!" he yelled.
The three other pilots rushed into Quatre's room and looked at Trowa, concern in their eyes.
"Where is he?" Duo asked.
"We have to go find him. I think he might have hurt himself…" Trowa responded.
"Shit…then let's go." Heero said.
The four bolted out the door in search for their friend.
*Back at the Bridge*
'You all were like family to me. I will no longer burden you...'
Quatre closed his eyes. He scooted closer towards the edge of the railing.
"This is my goodbye…"
With that, Quatre pushed off. The sound of a scream pierced the night sky, before Quatre's whole world collapsed before him.
*Two Minutes Ago*
"Quatre!! Where are you!!" Trowa screamed into the night. 'Please, my love…don't hurt yourself. Please…'
Then, a figure on the nearby bridge catches Trowa's eye.
"Quatre...?"
Trowa immediately recognizes the boy's platinum blonde hair against the dark sky. Trowa began to run to his Quatre when he noticed the blonde scooting off the railing. Realization strikes Trowa and he begins to run faster…
…But he's too late.
Quatre's small form disappears over the side of the railing, falling straight towards the icy waters below.
"NOOOOO!!! QUATRE!!!" Trowa's screams pierce into the night as he watches his beloved fall to his death.
This is my goodbye…I'm sorry…
Author's Notes/Disclaimer: I don't own the Gundam Wing boys. The Tomei guy, he belongs to me though.
I decided to write this fic while reading another one. The one I was reading didn't really satiate what I had in mind although it was still good. So I tried my hand at it. How'd I do? Questions? Comments? Please review!