A/N: Yay! I'm glad you're still with me! Not the ending yet Crystal! :o)
CHAPTER 11
Christian's mouth hung open. He pointed to a hole in the floor.
Christian: "You mean she's - down there?"
Toulouse: "Yesth . . ."
Christian: "But the Argentinean said that Satine was marrying the Duke!"
Toulouse: "Now why would he sthay a thing like that? The Duke never even came back to the Mouwin Wouge. But, just in case he did, Satine moved into your gawwet."
Christian had been worrying over nothing the whole time! Why would the Argentinean say such a thing? Christian shook his head and headed toward the hole.
Christian: "So long, Toulouse. Don't come a knockin' when the garret's a rockin', okay?"
Toulouse smirked.
Toulouse: "Got it."
Christian swung down into the garret. Sure enough, there was Satine, brushing her hair in the mirror. She saw his reflection and gasped.
Satine: "Christian! Is that you?"
Christian looked seductively at Satine and walked to her. He took her in his arms and dipped her, kissing her wildly. Christian stopped to breathe and before he could go in for the kill again, Satine put a finger to his lips, giggling in surprise at his forcefulness.
Satine: "Well, well! Are you the same Christian James that was petrified to show me his tighty whities? The same Christian James that ran in fear when he saw the chimpanzees in the zoo? And are you the same Christian James that nearly crapped his pants when a leaf blew by in the wind . . . "
Christian kissed her again, this time just to shut her up. Satine pulled away and furrowed her brow.
Satine: "Now wait a minute! I'm still mad at you!!!"
Christian: "Satine - stuff a flippin' sock in it!"
Once more, he planted a long, wet, sloppy kiss right on Satine's mouth. Satine drew back and panted.
Satine: "Just look what prison has made you into! A wild, unchivalrous, lunatic! . . . Just the way I like 'em."
Satine dropped her brush and wrapped her arms around him. Christian threw her onto the bed and hopped in, growling like a tiger.
Clothes strewn on the floor, tables and lamps knocked over, and a 1899 world record of 16 hours later, Christian and Satine finally sat satisfied in bed, puffing on long cigarettes.
Satine: "Christian, I never knew you had it in you."
Christian: "Neither did I. That was the most - "
But before Christian could finish his sentence, the door flew open and a squad of police, followed by the Land Lady came bursting in.
Land Lady: "That's him alright! I knew it when I saw him come in!"
The Land Lady held up a poster labeled "WANTED!" Below it was a picture of Christian and beneath that was printed, "Christian James. Wanted for: escaping jail, use of offensive language in public, and the murder of Mr. James Sr. Reward: a shit load of francs."
Land Lady: "Get this crook out of my apartments!"
The Land Lady waited for the police to jump Christian, but nothing happened. She whirled around to see 5 policemen staring and drooling at the exposed red head.
Angered, the Land Lady slapped each of them.
Land Lady: "C'mon you perverts! Take him away!"
The police snapped out of it and yanked Christian off the bed and whipped out their shiny handcuffs.
Christian: "NOOO! It wasn't me! It was the one-armed man!"
Police Man: "Don't even try that one."
Just then the one-armed man walked by with a hurt look on his face.
One-Armed Man: "Why does everyone always blame me?"
Satine could only watch woefully as they cuffed her poor Christian.
Satine: "Oh, Christian . . ."
As Christian was being whacked with sticks and painfully getting all chained up, he cried out,
Christian: "Satine! Everything I did - it was all so I could get to you! I love you!"
Satine: "I love you, too!"
Christian: "And the sex was great! I think I'll write about it."
Satine: "Yes, tell our story, Christian. You're great at soft porn."
Christian took one final blow to the head before he began to pass out. As they dragged the naked criminal away, he proclaimed,
Christian: "I will always love you!"
Satine waved goodbye until the last ogling police man left. She sighed and looked around the empty room. Then the door reopened and tall, skinny, dopey-looking Police Man entered.
Police Man: "Hey! I - uh - was just thinking maybe . . ."
Satine: "No."
Police Man: "Oh, alright. That's cool. Whatever. I'll just - "
Satine: "Goodbye!!!"
Police Man: "Oh, okay - I gotcha."
The Police Man slowly closed the door and Satine was once again left to her solitude.
Satine: "Well, this sucks. Christian is a convict. Now I'll only be to communicate with him by writing a letter. And I'm terrible with my correspondence."
Satine looked to her mail stacked to the ceiling in the corner of the room. She tossed her head back and sighed.
Satine: "God help me - I'm in love with a psycho, murderous jail bird."
A/N: Ha - weird chapter! There's probably only going to be one more. Thanks for reading, you guys rock! I'll try to post again soon.
Kattydid - Red Headed Giraffe was sort of an inside joke with my friends because I thought this one guy was cute, but my friend said he looked like a giraffe (he was really really tall and I guess on a second look, had a long neck lol!). So, I dubbed Nicole Kidman the Red Headed Giraffe.
Kellyanne - My cliff hanger was sweet revenge for all of your past cliff hangers! Haha!!!!
DISCLAIMER: See disclaimer in other chapters. "It wasn't me, it was the one- armed man," is from The Mask, which they used from something else - which I can't remember! Sorry!
CHAPTER 11
Christian's mouth hung open. He pointed to a hole in the floor.
Christian: "You mean she's - down there?"
Toulouse: "Yesth . . ."
Christian: "But the Argentinean said that Satine was marrying the Duke!"
Toulouse: "Now why would he sthay a thing like that? The Duke never even came back to the Mouwin Wouge. But, just in case he did, Satine moved into your gawwet."
Christian had been worrying over nothing the whole time! Why would the Argentinean say such a thing? Christian shook his head and headed toward the hole.
Christian: "So long, Toulouse. Don't come a knockin' when the garret's a rockin', okay?"
Toulouse smirked.
Toulouse: "Got it."
Christian swung down into the garret. Sure enough, there was Satine, brushing her hair in the mirror. She saw his reflection and gasped.
Satine: "Christian! Is that you?"
Christian looked seductively at Satine and walked to her. He took her in his arms and dipped her, kissing her wildly. Christian stopped to breathe and before he could go in for the kill again, Satine put a finger to his lips, giggling in surprise at his forcefulness.
Satine: "Well, well! Are you the same Christian James that was petrified to show me his tighty whities? The same Christian James that ran in fear when he saw the chimpanzees in the zoo? And are you the same Christian James that nearly crapped his pants when a leaf blew by in the wind . . . "
Christian kissed her again, this time just to shut her up. Satine pulled away and furrowed her brow.
Satine: "Now wait a minute! I'm still mad at you!!!"
Christian: "Satine - stuff a flippin' sock in it!"
Once more, he planted a long, wet, sloppy kiss right on Satine's mouth. Satine drew back and panted.
Satine: "Just look what prison has made you into! A wild, unchivalrous, lunatic! . . . Just the way I like 'em."
Satine dropped her brush and wrapped her arms around him. Christian threw her onto the bed and hopped in, growling like a tiger.
Clothes strewn on the floor, tables and lamps knocked over, and a 1899 world record of 16 hours later, Christian and Satine finally sat satisfied in bed, puffing on long cigarettes.
Satine: "Christian, I never knew you had it in you."
Christian: "Neither did I. That was the most - "
But before Christian could finish his sentence, the door flew open and a squad of police, followed by the Land Lady came bursting in.
Land Lady: "That's him alright! I knew it when I saw him come in!"
The Land Lady held up a poster labeled "WANTED!" Below it was a picture of Christian and beneath that was printed, "Christian James. Wanted for: escaping jail, use of offensive language in public, and the murder of Mr. James Sr. Reward: a shit load of francs."
Land Lady: "Get this crook out of my apartments!"
The Land Lady waited for the police to jump Christian, but nothing happened. She whirled around to see 5 policemen staring and drooling at the exposed red head.
Angered, the Land Lady slapped each of them.
Land Lady: "C'mon you perverts! Take him away!"
The police snapped out of it and yanked Christian off the bed and whipped out their shiny handcuffs.
Christian: "NOOO! It wasn't me! It was the one-armed man!"
Police Man: "Don't even try that one."
Just then the one-armed man walked by with a hurt look on his face.
One-Armed Man: "Why does everyone always blame me?"
Satine could only watch woefully as they cuffed her poor Christian.
Satine: "Oh, Christian . . ."
As Christian was being whacked with sticks and painfully getting all chained up, he cried out,
Christian: "Satine! Everything I did - it was all so I could get to you! I love you!"
Satine: "I love you, too!"
Christian: "And the sex was great! I think I'll write about it."
Satine: "Yes, tell our story, Christian. You're great at soft porn."
Christian took one final blow to the head before he began to pass out. As they dragged the naked criminal away, he proclaimed,
Christian: "I will always love you!"
Satine waved goodbye until the last ogling police man left. She sighed and looked around the empty room. Then the door reopened and tall, skinny, dopey-looking Police Man entered.
Police Man: "Hey! I - uh - was just thinking maybe . . ."
Satine: "No."
Police Man: "Oh, alright. That's cool. Whatever. I'll just - "
Satine: "Goodbye!!!"
Police Man: "Oh, okay - I gotcha."
The Police Man slowly closed the door and Satine was once again left to her solitude.
Satine: "Well, this sucks. Christian is a convict. Now I'll only be to communicate with him by writing a letter. And I'm terrible with my correspondence."
Satine looked to her mail stacked to the ceiling in the corner of the room. She tossed her head back and sighed.
Satine: "God help me - I'm in love with a psycho, murderous jail bird."
A/N: Ha - weird chapter! There's probably only going to be one more. Thanks for reading, you guys rock! I'll try to post again soon.
Kattydid - Red Headed Giraffe was sort of an inside joke with my friends because I thought this one guy was cute, but my friend said he looked like a giraffe (he was really really tall and I guess on a second look, had a long neck lol!). So, I dubbed Nicole Kidman the Red Headed Giraffe.
Kellyanne - My cliff hanger was sweet revenge for all of your past cliff hangers! Haha!!!!
DISCLAIMER: See disclaimer in other chapters. "It wasn't me, it was the one- armed man," is from The Mask, which they used from something else - which I can't remember! Sorry!