The Arrival
A/N sry it took a while to get this thing up. My computer, as stupid as it is, wouldn't let me on since last weekend, so, yeah, and it may not be THAT funny as I hoped it would be. Too bad they didn't have a category called "insanity", cause that would be the one I'd put this under. It's far too insane for little children, lol, well, here it FINALLY is:
The train ride to the beach was very.disturbing. Out the window, there were dancing hamsters, and fat old guys hugging a kid, who had a nametag that said, "OTiger". The next thing that happened was that Ron was making faces to pass time, but to save the world, his luggage fell on his head, knocking him out. Harry and Hermione just left him there. The train suddenly went to a hault.
"We're HERE!" Harry said, jumping up, and hitting his head. Hermione looked at Ron, who was still knocked out, and Harry, who had his hand on his head.
"You know, we're so screwed," Hermione said, shaking her head.
After waking Ron up, which was pretty hard, they left out the train to the beach. It was one of the biggest ones Harry ever saw. While walking to find a place to settle, Hermione tripped over a small pebble, and went head first into the sand. She wasn't knocked out, but she didn't get up.
"Well, this looks like a good spot," Ron said, setting the beach blankets next to Hermione. Ron smiled at Harry, and grabbed a handful of sand, dumping it on Hermione's head. She didn't even move or curse at him. Again, Ron smiled and poured sand all over her, until she wasn't seen.
"Um, Ron? Are you sure you should be doing that? I mean, she could breathe in the sand," Harry asked.
"As sure as I am with my potions," Ron said, as they headed for the water.
"Oh, well, then, she'll live a long life." and Harry never said anything more on the way. There were a lot of kids from Hogwarts in already, but when they got there, the water was freezing cold. Ron, on the other hand, jumped in. He shivered a bit, but smiled.
"C'mon, Harry! The water's fine!" he chattered.
"Sure, maybe fine for penguins," Harry muttered, turning back, but he didn't get too far. Ron got out of the water, and threw Harry over his shoulders, and started to walk BACK towards the water.
"Nooo! It's too cold to go in, I ca-" Harry started, but Ron threw him in. Harry could hardly breathe cause it was that cold. He started to shiver out of control, as Ron laughed, and got in himself, again. Dean and Seamus started to swim towards them, along with Parveti, Padma, Lavender, and Ginny.
"Isn't the water great?" Dean smiled. 'What is with these people. It's FREEZING. Are they insane clowns called penny-wise??' Harry thought, but knew that they were that insane. Suddenly, Harry's foot was being tugged at by something. He couldn't see what that something was, but had a strange feeling it was a shark. He started to scream, like a girl, and swim away. But before he knew it, the thing that gotton hold of his leg, let go. Harry looked back to see Seamus rising from the water, laughing, along with everyone else. "That was bloody wicked! Did you hear him scream like a girl?" Lavender said, laughing uncontrollably, but her laughter stopped, as she looked at the water around her.
"What is it, Lav?" Dean asked, looking around, too.
"Doesn't the water seem a bit..warmer then it was?" She replied. Everyone looked at Harry, who just blushed.
"Ewwww, Harry wet himself! RUN FOR IT!!" Ron screamed, getting ashore. Everyone else were stampeding there, too. Harry just stood there, too embarrassed to move, until a huge wave from out of nowhere hit him, carrying him out deeper than he wanted, until he couldn't feel th bottom of the ocean floor. Everyone at shore started yelling, but he couldn't hear them. He was too busy trying to keep his head from going into the water. The biggest problem there was is that Harry couldn't swim. He never learned, because his aunt and uncle never taught him, but for a reason. They hoped that one day, he would drown. 'Maybe that one day is today,' Harry thought, trying to stay above the water.
Suddenly, he could barely see something in the sky. It looked like a person, but only a person. No helicopter, plane, anything. 'I'm seeing things,' he told himself, but he wasn't. As the thing got closer, he saw that it in fact was a human. But not just ANY human, but Professor Snape. He was flying because he inflated his BOOB.
"Potter! Grab my hand!" Snape said. Frightened to do so, it took him while to get himself to. 'I'd rather live,' Harry thought, and grabbed on, as he was lifted from the water. As they got closer, everyone was clapping, though some where a bit disgusted by the inflated boob part. As Harry was lowered, everyone ran up and gave him a hug.
"You're alive!" Ginny screamed, giving him a big hug. Harry smiled, and turned around to thank Snape, but he was gone. 'Well..all I can say is, that was pretty scary,' and he and Ron headed back to where Hermione was burried. Problem was. They couldn't remember where.
"If anyone asks..you did it," Harry said, searching around the sand.
"Found her!" Ron yelled to Harry, as he rushed over to where Ron was. Hermione seemed to be sleeping, because all she did was snore. There then was a horn sounded off. That ment that anyone from Hogwarts was suppose to board the train.
"Hermione, wake up! We need to get back on the train," Ron said, poking her. She moved onto her side, a smile on her face, but still asleep. Harry slapped his forehead, and Ron shook his head.
"Fine, we'll leve without you. It'll be pretty hard to find your way back to the castle, and not to mention it's high tide. The water's almost reaching us," Ron said, trying not to laugh. Hermione's eye flew opened, and she jumped back. Both Harry and Ron bursted out, laughing. The look Hermione gave them was priceless. She gave a sigh, and laughed with them, but then stopped.
"Man! I wasted my whole time SLEEPING. Why didn't you guys wake me up?" Hermione asked them.
"Well, we thought you'd wake up, considering you were underneath the sand. And when we got here, we kind of had a problem finding you," Ron said, still laughing like an idiot. Hermione threw a beach towel at him, covering his face.
"Guys, we better get back to the train before it leaves without us!" Harry said, pulling his pants over his swimming shorts, and then pulled on a shirt, quickly gathering his things, as Ron and Hermione followed the suit. They ran to the train just before it left.
"That was close!" Harry said, going into a compartment and falling in a seat. They decided it was no use putting their luggage on the racks, so they just let them sit in the middle, and they put Ron's in front of the door so that no one, like Malfoy, could enter.
"What happened while I was asleep?" Hermione suddenly asked.
"Well, Harry went out into what seemed like the middle of the ocean, and Snape had to rescue him by inflating his..boob," Ron said, a bit disgusted, but then he began to laugh, "but that was AFTER Harry had an accident in the water. Everyone ran away from him, and started calling it, "Harry's Accident". It was quiet funny."
"Well, Harry, seems that no one's too old to wear diapers!" Hermione laughed, and Ron joined in. Harry sat there, smiling in embarrassment. 'This was going to be long ride home' Harry thought, shaking his head.
A/N I'M DONE!! Dum dum dum! Well, this frankly is my only story where Ron doesn't fall in love with Hermione, and it's also the only one I have that is humor. The rest of my stories are mostly Romance/drama. If you want me to make more humor, I guess I can. I just need help with the funniness. Plz review!!
A/N sry it took a while to get this thing up. My computer, as stupid as it is, wouldn't let me on since last weekend, so, yeah, and it may not be THAT funny as I hoped it would be. Too bad they didn't have a category called "insanity", cause that would be the one I'd put this under. It's far too insane for little children, lol, well, here it FINALLY is:
The train ride to the beach was very.disturbing. Out the window, there were dancing hamsters, and fat old guys hugging a kid, who had a nametag that said, "OTiger". The next thing that happened was that Ron was making faces to pass time, but to save the world, his luggage fell on his head, knocking him out. Harry and Hermione just left him there. The train suddenly went to a hault.
"We're HERE!" Harry said, jumping up, and hitting his head. Hermione looked at Ron, who was still knocked out, and Harry, who had his hand on his head.
"You know, we're so screwed," Hermione said, shaking her head.
After waking Ron up, which was pretty hard, they left out the train to the beach. It was one of the biggest ones Harry ever saw. While walking to find a place to settle, Hermione tripped over a small pebble, and went head first into the sand. She wasn't knocked out, but she didn't get up.
"Well, this looks like a good spot," Ron said, setting the beach blankets next to Hermione. Ron smiled at Harry, and grabbed a handful of sand, dumping it on Hermione's head. She didn't even move or curse at him. Again, Ron smiled and poured sand all over her, until she wasn't seen.
"Um, Ron? Are you sure you should be doing that? I mean, she could breathe in the sand," Harry asked.
"As sure as I am with my potions," Ron said, as they headed for the water.
"Oh, well, then, she'll live a long life." and Harry never said anything more on the way. There were a lot of kids from Hogwarts in already, but when they got there, the water was freezing cold. Ron, on the other hand, jumped in. He shivered a bit, but smiled.
"C'mon, Harry! The water's fine!" he chattered.
"Sure, maybe fine for penguins," Harry muttered, turning back, but he didn't get too far. Ron got out of the water, and threw Harry over his shoulders, and started to walk BACK towards the water.
"Nooo! It's too cold to go in, I ca-" Harry started, but Ron threw him in. Harry could hardly breathe cause it was that cold. He started to shiver out of control, as Ron laughed, and got in himself, again. Dean and Seamus started to swim towards them, along with Parveti, Padma, Lavender, and Ginny.
"Isn't the water great?" Dean smiled. 'What is with these people. It's FREEZING. Are they insane clowns called penny-wise??' Harry thought, but knew that they were that insane. Suddenly, Harry's foot was being tugged at by something. He couldn't see what that something was, but had a strange feeling it was a shark. He started to scream, like a girl, and swim away. But before he knew it, the thing that gotton hold of his leg, let go. Harry looked back to see Seamus rising from the water, laughing, along with everyone else. "That was bloody wicked! Did you hear him scream like a girl?" Lavender said, laughing uncontrollably, but her laughter stopped, as she looked at the water around her.
"What is it, Lav?" Dean asked, looking around, too.
"Doesn't the water seem a bit..warmer then it was?" She replied. Everyone looked at Harry, who just blushed.
"Ewwww, Harry wet himself! RUN FOR IT!!" Ron screamed, getting ashore. Everyone else were stampeding there, too. Harry just stood there, too embarrassed to move, until a huge wave from out of nowhere hit him, carrying him out deeper than he wanted, until he couldn't feel th bottom of the ocean floor. Everyone at shore started yelling, but he couldn't hear them. He was too busy trying to keep his head from going into the water. The biggest problem there was is that Harry couldn't swim. He never learned, because his aunt and uncle never taught him, but for a reason. They hoped that one day, he would drown. 'Maybe that one day is today,' Harry thought, trying to stay above the water.
Suddenly, he could barely see something in the sky. It looked like a person, but only a person. No helicopter, plane, anything. 'I'm seeing things,' he told himself, but he wasn't. As the thing got closer, he saw that it in fact was a human. But not just ANY human, but Professor Snape. He was flying because he inflated his BOOB.
"Potter! Grab my hand!" Snape said. Frightened to do so, it took him while to get himself to. 'I'd rather live,' Harry thought, and grabbed on, as he was lifted from the water. As they got closer, everyone was clapping, though some where a bit disgusted by the inflated boob part. As Harry was lowered, everyone ran up and gave him a hug.
"You're alive!" Ginny screamed, giving him a big hug. Harry smiled, and turned around to thank Snape, but he was gone. 'Well..all I can say is, that was pretty scary,' and he and Ron headed back to where Hermione was burried. Problem was. They couldn't remember where.
"If anyone asks..you did it," Harry said, searching around the sand.
"Found her!" Ron yelled to Harry, as he rushed over to where Ron was. Hermione seemed to be sleeping, because all she did was snore. There then was a horn sounded off. That ment that anyone from Hogwarts was suppose to board the train.
"Hermione, wake up! We need to get back on the train," Ron said, poking her. She moved onto her side, a smile on her face, but still asleep. Harry slapped his forehead, and Ron shook his head.
"Fine, we'll leve without you. It'll be pretty hard to find your way back to the castle, and not to mention it's high tide. The water's almost reaching us," Ron said, trying not to laugh. Hermione's eye flew opened, and she jumped back. Both Harry and Ron bursted out, laughing. The look Hermione gave them was priceless. She gave a sigh, and laughed with them, but then stopped.
"Man! I wasted my whole time SLEEPING. Why didn't you guys wake me up?" Hermione asked them.
"Well, we thought you'd wake up, considering you were underneath the sand. And when we got here, we kind of had a problem finding you," Ron said, still laughing like an idiot. Hermione threw a beach towel at him, covering his face.
"Guys, we better get back to the train before it leaves without us!" Harry said, pulling his pants over his swimming shorts, and then pulled on a shirt, quickly gathering his things, as Ron and Hermione followed the suit. They ran to the train just before it left.
"That was close!" Harry said, going into a compartment and falling in a seat. They decided it was no use putting their luggage on the racks, so they just let them sit in the middle, and they put Ron's in front of the door so that no one, like Malfoy, could enter.
"What happened while I was asleep?" Hermione suddenly asked.
"Well, Harry went out into what seemed like the middle of the ocean, and Snape had to rescue him by inflating his..boob," Ron said, a bit disgusted, but then he began to laugh, "but that was AFTER Harry had an accident in the water. Everyone ran away from him, and started calling it, "Harry's Accident". It was quiet funny."
"Well, Harry, seems that no one's too old to wear diapers!" Hermione laughed, and Ron joined in. Harry sat there, smiling in embarrassment. 'This was going to be long ride home' Harry thought, shaking his head.
A/N I'M DONE!! Dum dum dum! Well, this frankly is my only story where Ron doesn't fall in love with Hermione, and it's also the only one I have that is humor. The rest of my stories are mostly Romance/drama. If you want me to make more humor, I guess I can. I just need help with the funniness. Plz review!!