*Agent Di (author) springs out in a green elf's outfit.* I can't believe I'm wearing this! *Elf looking JeeDang partner elbows her in the ribs.* Oh yeah, I don't own MIB: The Series, but I do own this story and some of the characters. The other characters (Santa's helpers, hehe) belong to either Delia, Chanda, or Jen. *Agent Chase (JeeDang partner) coughs annoyingly.* AND---this is just my way of wishing you all Happy Holidays. Hope you'll like this gift even though it's not something that will fit in a stocking or under a tree (but if you're really tore up about it I guess you could print it and put it there). *Chase elbows Di again.* OW! *Di glares at someone who won't be getting anything but coal this year.* Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

The Ho! Ho! Ho! Syndrome

Part One: Peace on Earth

Holiday music played as New Yorkers hustled along the crowded sidewalks in the chilly December air. Last minute Christmas shoppers bustled in and out of stores greeting each other as they passed on to the next holiday sale. There was a bell ringing Santa on every street corner, decorations hanging from lampposts, and flyers for the Christmas parade swirling around the streets with every gust of wind.

The crowd made it especially hard for the local public defenders to do their job. No, they weren't the NYPD. Not even the FBI came close to this organization. They were the proud few sporting black suits and ties. The anonymous apparitions that were literally 'gone in a flash'. They were the Men In Black.

A figure grumbled as he got out of the black SUV on the street corner. A snowflake had just landed on the nose of his human disguise, "Great, it's starting to snow."

"Indeed!" another voice piped up behind him.

"Aaahh!" the first figure jumped, "Don't DO THAT!"

The second disguised figure chuckled and held up his scanner, "Relax Agent X, after all, this is the Earth holiday known as Christmas. It's a time of cheer and good will."

"I should've dropped you off at the Goodwill." X sneered to Zeeltor. "And the only thing cheery about this is that Elle's not here. Where is she anyway?"

"Well," Zeeltor thought back, "I believe that she and Yazmine went out shopping with a few of the other women."

X rolled his eyes, his partner was such a typical female sometimes. At least someone else would be hauling around her forty pairs of new shoes this time. "C'mon," he growled, "let's get this over with."

Nodding Zeeltor scanned the street Santa by the bakery in front of them, "Hmm…this darn scanner's picking up a lot of static. Probably from all the electrical equipment and radio waves."

"Just find out if fat boy's our culprit!" X shivered as the temperatures continued to drop.

Still uncertain Zeeltor studied the small screen, he just knew he should've grabbed the other scanner.

"Well?!" X demanded.

"Um…" the skeletal structure flickered once, "…there, I believe that's our man--ur--alien."

The Santa checked his watch and turned to gather up his supplies.

"He's getting away!" X shouted and charged the unsuspecting suspect.

Zeeltor watched as X tackled the Santa and yanked off his beard. "Alright pal, we know who you REALLY are so drop the phony act!"

Zeeltor was staring at the scanner as X continued with his threats. The scanner stopped flickering and Zeeltor noticed that he'd made a rather serious error.

"Look pal," the Santa exclaimed nervously, "I told ya, that WAS my disguise!"

"Uh, Agent X…"

"What?!" X replied, "Can't you see I'm busy exposing this fraud?"

"But Agent," Zeeltor insisted, "I believe we have the wrong Santa!"

X stopped jerking on the poor man's hair and got to his feet. Dusting off his pants he turned to the good doctor, "May I see that scanner of yours for a moment?"

Not picking up on the suspicious tone of the agent's voice Zeeltor handed him the scanner.

Taking the device from Zeeltor, X forcefully slammed it against the cement sidewalk and proceeded to stomp it flat.

"Well," Zeeltor gasped, "It seems the holidays have made you a tad hypertensive."

The street Santa uneasily got to his feet, "Would someone mind telling me what's going on here?"

Whipping out his Neuralyzer X angrily spun around wearing his Ray Bans and explained after the flash, "After drinking too much eggnog you passed out on the street corner and dreamed this whole thing. Now you're going home to roast chestnuts on a fire and listen to annoying human Christmas carols."

"That was a cheery memory," Zeeltor grinned pulling off his Ray Bans.

"If we're not out of here with the perp by sundown I'm gonna deck your halls!" X scowled. "How's that for the Christmas spirit?!"

Zeeltor gulped and went back to the SUV with what was left of the scanner. X continued to grumble as he slammed the door shut and started the engine. The snow was picking up and the last thing he wanted to do was spend the night in the cramped SUV snowed in with Zeeltor. If the kook didn't drive him crazy he'd probably remove his brain!

******

Not far from where the Santa incident had taken place six women emerged from a shopping center, "Who'd have thought those little Wetting Wendys would be so popular this year?" Elle exclaimed referring to a toy fight that had just taken place in aisle 3.

"Makes ya glad you don't have kids to buy for," Delia stated, "well---there's Jay."

"Don't worry Del," A laughed, "if it lights up and makes lots of goofy noises, he'll love it."

"So long as it's not a key chain for the LTD," Aileen added, "Kay'd wring our necks!"

Elle glanced down at her watch, "We'd better get back to HQ, there's no telling what sort of trouble X has gotten me into by now."

"Tell me about it hon," Yazmine chuckled, "I'll just be happy to come back to an intact lab!"

Aileen tossed the keys to her partner, "I'm beat, shopping for Kay's more challenging than busting a Parvecian drug ring."

"So what'd you wind up getting him?" Val inquired as they climbed into their vehicle.

"Elvis's latest album, autographed it for me back on Suadia when we played bodyguards for his thirty planet tour."

"Wow," A said from the backseat, "he's getting a tie and shoe polish from me."

At the next vehicle Elle and Delia were stuffing bags in the trunk while Yazmine cranked up the heater.

"Burr…" she shivered, "looks like we'll get a good three feet from this storm."

"How can ya tell?" Delia called after cramming the last shopping bag in and slamming the lid down.

"After studying polar bears in the Arctic for seven months you get good at predicting these things," Elle responded.

"Polar bears?" Delia repeated.

"Yep." Yazmine replied as the two blondes got in, "Native to Earth, Borang, and southern Frigidar. They make very popular pets in the Toupell Galaxy, royals can't get enough of them."

"Whoa," Delia muttered, "say Yaz---what do you know about the origins of anchovies?"

"Sorry," Yazmine winked in the rearview mirror, "that's classified."

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*This is part one, see, I got it up BEFORE New Years! ^_^ If your character's not mentioned yet don't worry, there's plenty more where this came from. Reviews mean Santa will mark ya off the naughty list (kidding, Santa doesn't pass out favors). :-P *