My muse is back with a vengeance! I should really change Chapter 1- it
kinda sucks......
"Ray," I hissed, "Pst, Ray!" He ignored me. I guess that's alright, because I was trying to get him to let me copy his Algebra homework. I didn't do mine again, and I didn't want to lose my good grade in the class. "Pleeaase Ray, I promise I'll do the work from now on!" I pleaded, giving him the puppy eyes.
"Lainy, you know I don't think that it's a good idea, you need to do your own! If you hurry you can still get it in time- it's not due until the end of the period." He reasoned, "If you need help, then I'll help, but..."
I scowled, "I know how to do the work, Raymon!"
"Then do it!!"
Sometimes Ray could be so holier-than-thou. It's alright though, I shrugged it off with a sigh, and now it looks like I have to do work. With a whine I almost set pencil to paper before I had another great idea. "I know!" I hollered, attracting stares from my classmates and teacher, "I'll call Spider-Man with my patent Spidey Call!"
"Gobbloogoooblooogoooblooogooobloooo....." I whispered.
"Um, Li? Spider-Man lives in New York." Ray reminded me.
"Oh, you're right. I have to call louder."
"Good plan." He approved before directing his attention back to his paper.
"GOOOBLOOOGOOOBLOOOOOGOOOBLOOOOOOOO!"
I swung WAY up high, then way down low, feeling the breeze on my face, in my hair, running through me and taking all the bad parts of my day with it. Ray swung slightly off key beside me, and Abby swung on my other side perfectly in my window. Ray had just moved into the house across the street from mine, and Abby had always lived behind me, so now all three of us came to the park at night to watch the stars and swing. It's so relaxing, all the muscles in my body loosen up, and I can just take in the beauty of the night.
...Truth, Beauty, Freedom, and above all things...
Where had that voice come from?!
...Love....
STOP! I don't need love! I yelled defiantly in my head, lying to myself.
I'm sorry, Henri... whispered another part of me, a part that lived in my heart. At least I got to hear your voice... but you know I can't go through this again.
Suddenly I started singing out loud, unable to stop myself and hide my feelings from my friends.
I want to touch you,
I want to see your face,
I want to know you more,
I want to see you,
I want to hear your voice........
I want to know you more.
Ray never knew about Henri. On that train of thought, she couldn't help savoring his name in her mind. Henri Marie Raymond.... Wait! His third name was Raymond...
"Ray!" I said more sharply than I'd intended, "What's your full name?"
"Raymond MonFa, at your service." He replied, just a bit confused.
Another voice echoed in my head, one that I used to hear every morning, one that filled me with such joy... "Good morning, love, it's dear old Henri Marie Raymond Toulouse Latrec MonFa, at your service."
Suddenly numb, I fell off my swing on it's high arch, sliding through gravel and coming to a stop on the grass. Bleeding through my nose, scrapes on every limb, and a cut in my mouth, I wearily, sadly, picked myself up and ran into Abby's comforting hug. Oddly enough, all I could consciously think about was the inappropriate hope that the hot tears that trickled down wouldn't stain her beautiful new sweater.
Ray was panicked, jumping off his swing and running over. "What's wrong," he asked frantically, only to be turned away by a distressed Abby.
"I'm sorry, Ray, but you'd only make it worse."
"Is she Ok? What did I do, why won't you let me see her?!" he practically screamed in anxious agony as Abby led me away. Ray stood there unmoving for half an hour afterwards, worried sick.
Abby knew what was wrong, because I told her everything. She knew about hearing Toulouse every day, what he'd said, how I'd let him go; she knew everything. She knew why I couldn't stand to be around Ray after that, because he was too much like a dull plastic copy of Henri, without his love and energy and cheerfulness. There could never be another to replace Henri for me, I could never accept a copy or even worse, a descendent! That would mean Henri hadn't been true to me, and I knew he had, I just knew!! If the love was strong enough to span time, then it was strong enough to be worth fighting for. Then that thought created another; did i have the right to ask faithfulness if I didn't fight for him, didn't remain faithful to him. Even though I didn't initiate it, the kiss in the lunchroom burned through my heart.
The very idea of him kissing me if he had been Henri's great grandchild was disgusting.
And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
And you bleed just to know you're alive
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
Abby knew all this, and as she led me back home the thoughts crossed her mind, but she focused on one thing. "They look so much alike. What if he was a descendent of Toulouse, but also of Alaina?"
"Ray," I hissed, "Pst, Ray!" He ignored me. I guess that's alright, because I was trying to get him to let me copy his Algebra homework. I didn't do mine again, and I didn't want to lose my good grade in the class. "Pleeaase Ray, I promise I'll do the work from now on!" I pleaded, giving him the puppy eyes.
"Lainy, you know I don't think that it's a good idea, you need to do your own! If you hurry you can still get it in time- it's not due until the end of the period." He reasoned, "If you need help, then I'll help, but..."
I scowled, "I know how to do the work, Raymon!"
"Then do it!!"
Sometimes Ray could be so holier-than-thou. It's alright though, I shrugged it off with a sigh, and now it looks like I have to do work. With a whine I almost set pencil to paper before I had another great idea. "I know!" I hollered, attracting stares from my classmates and teacher, "I'll call Spider-Man with my patent Spidey Call!"
"Gobbloogoooblooogoooblooogooobloooo....." I whispered.
"Um, Li? Spider-Man lives in New York." Ray reminded me.
"Oh, you're right. I have to call louder."
"Good plan." He approved before directing his attention back to his paper.
"GOOOBLOOOGOOOBLOOOOOGOOOBLOOOOOOOO!"
I swung WAY up high, then way down low, feeling the breeze on my face, in my hair, running through me and taking all the bad parts of my day with it. Ray swung slightly off key beside me, and Abby swung on my other side perfectly in my window. Ray had just moved into the house across the street from mine, and Abby had always lived behind me, so now all three of us came to the park at night to watch the stars and swing. It's so relaxing, all the muscles in my body loosen up, and I can just take in the beauty of the night.
...Truth, Beauty, Freedom, and above all things...
Where had that voice come from?!
...Love....
STOP! I don't need love! I yelled defiantly in my head, lying to myself.
I'm sorry, Henri... whispered another part of me, a part that lived in my heart. At least I got to hear your voice... but you know I can't go through this again.
Suddenly I started singing out loud, unable to stop myself and hide my feelings from my friends.
I want to touch you,
I want to see your face,
I want to know you more,
I want to see you,
I want to hear your voice........
I want to know you more.
Ray never knew about Henri. On that train of thought, she couldn't help savoring his name in her mind. Henri Marie Raymond.... Wait! His third name was Raymond...
"Ray!" I said more sharply than I'd intended, "What's your full name?"
"Raymond MonFa, at your service." He replied, just a bit confused.
Another voice echoed in my head, one that I used to hear every morning, one that filled me with such joy... "Good morning, love, it's dear old Henri Marie Raymond Toulouse Latrec MonFa, at your service."
Suddenly numb, I fell off my swing on it's high arch, sliding through gravel and coming to a stop on the grass. Bleeding through my nose, scrapes on every limb, and a cut in my mouth, I wearily, sadly, picked myself up and ran into Abby's comforting hug. Oddly enough, all I could consciously think about was the inappropriate hope that the hot tears that trickled down wouldn't stain her beautiful new sweater.
Ray was panicked, jumping off his swing and running over. "What's wrong," he asked frantically, only to be turned away by a distressed Abby.
"I'm sorry, Ray, but you'd only make it worse."
"Is she Ok? What did I do, why won't you let me see her?!" he practically screamed in anxious agony as Abby led me away. Ray stood there unmoving for half an hour afterwards, worried sick.
Abby knew what was wrong, because I told her everything. She knew about hearing Toulouse every day, what he'd said, how I'd let him go; she knew everything. She knew why I couldn't stand to be around Ray after that, because he was too much like a dull plastic copy of Henri, without his love and energy and cheerfulness. There could never be another to replace Henri for me, I could never accept a copy or even worse, a descendent! That would mean Henri hadn't been true to me, and I knew he had, I just knew!! If the love was strong enough to span time, then it was strong enough to be worth fighting for. Then that thought created another; did i have the right to ask faithfulness if I didn't fight for him, didn't remain faithful to him. Even though I didn't initiate it, the kiss in the lunchroom burned through my heart.
The very idea of him kissing me if he had been Henri's great grandchild was disgusting.
And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
And you bleed just to know you're alive
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
Abby knew all this, and as she led me back home the thoughts crossed her mind, but she focused on one thing. "They look so much alike. What if he was a descendent of Toulouse, but also of Alaina?"