Cheers for all the new reviews - this is a bit of an experimental chapter due to the response I've received! Any comments - you know what to do..... Oh yeah - someone mentioned the swearing, what can I say - they're British, they're 15/16 year olds, and it's all edited/sensored and quite tongue in cheek. Besides, they were saying 'bloody' in the film and they were only supposed to be 11 then! However, if it is a problem then I will check my rating and adjust as I feel appropriate.
Hermione
So....... It's been a very eventful week. If I'd known that being 16 was this complicated, I might have chosen to ignore my birthday - or something like that! Confused? I am too. But I have a problem, actually two problems, in the shape of my 'best friends'. I've liked Harry in, you know, 'that' way for ages, I don't think he knows and I don't think he likes me back, but that's the way it is. We'd go so well together........ Anyway, I wasn't happy with his lack of response (and his affection for Cho for that matter), but I was happy in my feelings for him. Everything was simple. Now.... I still really, really like Harry, but I think I might also feel something for Ron as well. It's since Harry and I accidentally on purpose read his diary the other day. I found out that he likes me - and since it's not really working out with Harry, I was wondering, should I go down the Ron route? I've always liked him, maybe not in 'that' way, but still. Would it be using him if I squandered my feelings for Harry and pursued Ron? I don't know. I like them both so it's not really wrong and, as I don't see myself as a threesome kind of girl (actually that would be kind of interesting!), I guess I've got some thinking to do.
It's been fifteen minutes since I wrote the above paragraph, and I still haven't reached a sensible conclusion. Several completely idiotic, immature and unfeasible ones, yes - but nothing sensible or practical. Just because you didn't ask, here are some of the bizarre solutions I came up with: Magically cloning myself and going out with them both. Rejected because too messy and complicated. Quitting Hogwarts and joining the Beauxbaton's nunnery, *cough*, academy. Rejected because - well, just because! Going out with Seamus, Dean or Neville - they're lovely guys but, between them, they're enough to put a girl off men for life! All of these hormones and confusion appear to be affecting my schoolwork as well as my sanity. I wrote an essay today for History of Magic, and I was barely able to string together coherent sentences, let alone discuss 'rebellions of the magical community through the ages' in depth, using analysis skills and deep understanding. I don't even understand myself, so how I'm supposed to understand the motives of hags 500 years ago I don't know.
I'm just so frenzied, frantic, and completely not making sense right now. Can you tell that I'm an extremely confused 16 year old? Is that coming across in my diary entry today? No, I didn't think so either. Heck, now I'm becoming sarcastic - I'm definitely not feeling normal. Sarcasm is usually reserved for certain irritating members of the male population who seem to be featuring rather a lot in this (oh and Malfoy, but he's not worth the time or the space, so I say no more on the subject.). What is happening to me? Other people have hormones and crushes and strange thoughts involving threesomes: not me. I'm Hermione Granger, star pupil, complete rationalist (if you forget a few irrational moments such as the Lockhart crush), and irregular teenager. I just don't do confusion concerning which of my best friends I fancy more.
Right. I have decided to choose rationally - by making a list. I don't really want to have to choose between them, but that's the way it is. I will list the pros and the cons for each boy. *Takes a deep breath* Here goes:
Pros - Harry
Sweet; clever; cute; passionate; strong (determined)
Cons - Harry
You Know Who is always trying to kill him; he is a complete idiot sometimes; he actually pays attention to Malfoy; stubborn as hell.
This is too hard. Never mind - I've started so I'll finish:
Pros - Ron
Fiery; funny; caring
Cons - Ron
Bad tempered; jealous; possessive
Ohhhh..... I just can't do this. A stupid crush (or two) is taking over my life. I have a major Potions essay due in tomorrow and all I've written is the title. This is just not like me: I set deadlines, I stick to them, I avoid detention, I become everyone's favourite student. Except Snape's, that is, and for that point.... the essay doesn't really matter anyway (!). I mean, I'll probably still end up in detention. I cannot believe I just said that..
I can't do this to Ron. I like Harry too much. It wouldn't be fair. Oh god, I'm reduced to five word sentences again. You know what? I don't need a boyfriend. I have an education. I rest my case.
Who am I trying to kid?
I really have to stop telling the world my feelings for my two best friends! More when I have recovered my sense of being and rationality and finished my Potions work. What I said before about it still stands, but I'll sleep easier if I know it's finished.
Love, an extremely confused and currently incredibly irate, Hermione xx
So....... what does anybody think? A little weird I know, but I wanted Hermione to completely lose that cool front she shows and act like a regular teenager - you know, confused and extremely all over the place. I hope she comes across as that! Anyway. Please click on that little purple button on the side of the screen. You know you want to, and it would make me very, very happy! Besides, if you don't, I'll set Hagrid and one of his nasty magical creatures on you!
Rachel xx