Title: Between the good spot and a hard place
Author: atheniandream/Jawbreakerchick/Paisleychick, my alter egos :)
Email: atheniandream@aol.com
Content Warnings: Jack POV, supposed humor, I don't know i'm crap at emotive suggestion.
Pairings: Sam/Jack
Spoilers: None. Zip. Nada.
Season: 6 or above depending on series outcome.
Rating:Pg-13 maybe a little more, swearing contained.
Author's notes: I was going to write a dream in a dream in a dream in a dream, then,
I wrote this!!! remenber feed me! I love it! really I do. :) :) :( :
Disclaimer: Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions,
Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA,
Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes
only and no money exchanged hands.
No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the
property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the
author.

I was going to write a dream in a dream in a dream in a dream, then, I wrote this!!!
Quote of the moment, "I'm drinking your coffee, god damn it!" SFX magazine



Between the good spot and a hard place


*WARNING*: Before reading this fic you must remember the following statement.
*WHERE TWO END UP, OTHERS FOLLOW!!!!*

Ah, the broom closet. One of my favourite places.
It's dark,
sometimes quiet,
always warm,
and never a single interuptio-

"Colonel?"
A whispering Major enters, Only lonely Colonel joined by a randy Major.

"Carter?" I whisper back.

"Yes Si-"
She didn't finish, I've been waiting for like 20 minutes, god damn it!
Touching. Now I love touching, it's sooo touchy......?
My hands had gone straight for the 'safe places'. For those unexperienced
in Carter's 'safe places' they exist for the most part on the top half of her body.
I use the term 'for the most part', loosly.
"So......wha..t....took, you so long?"
I ask, slightly in a disgruntled fashion-look when you've been waiting in a damp
broom closet for almost a half hour your allowed a certain amount of disruntlement!

"Work, busy." She purrs, Carter purrs, oh yea!
I've lost any interet in the question I asked, just think of it as losing
yourself in the moment. Hell, I'm so lost, I'm stuck with Dorothy! Ive alredy tumbled
through the rabbit hole and made my way to Kansas by now!
I continue with my hands doing the talking, well as you know hands dont' actually talk,
but if they did, right they'd probably be saying,
"gggraaaaallllwelllllarrrrrrrlllllmmmmnnnnn." Or something to that effect.

"Colonel, wait!" I distangle my happy little self from a very aggetated, wide eyed, flushed
Major.
"What?"
"I thought I heard something

As you can guess, both Carter and I like to conduct non-work exercise in a pro-work atmosphere.
This, is where the obvious problem starts. Again.

"Colonel? Major?" Another whispering voice. Shit!
"Jonas!" Carter mumbled into my mouth.
"Sam, it's not good to be making out with one guy, and mumbling the name of another at the same
time. In some countries it's considered rude."
Right now, even though I'm trying not to picture her face, I know the expression. it's not a
good one, kind of a cross between 'Shut up Colonel', and 'Oh darn'. I ignore both, and focus
most of my attention on the fading siloutte on our side of the door. wait, How'd he get in here?
Okay, one lonely Colonel, one Randy Major, and an alien with inappropriate timing.
"Jonas, what are doing here?"
"I wanted to tell you that General Hammonds, coming to see you, you were spot on the sec-"
"What the General!" Carter squeals.
What is up with Carter today. Her current state of awareness causes me to do my best to calm
the situation and her a little. They say that hands are the tools of Love.
Not in this case they damn well aren't. She bats an idle hand away.
"Will you not?"
"What?" Both myself and Jonas reply in unison, he's obviously as shocked as I am.
okay, change the subject....
"What do you mean the General saw us, like again?"
I'm interrupted. Big Whoop.
"MajorCarter, O'Neill, JonasQuinn?" Teal'c. A little louder Teal'c. They cant' quite hear you
topside.
"What?" we all whisper back, as he joins us. One lonely Colonel, one Randy Major, an alien with
inappropriate timing and a loud Jaffa. Great.
May I mention that this broom closet is of a moderate size, origanally, Carter and I had
spontaniously christened it as 'Our Place', but now, the room, my attention span, and might I
mention my trousers have all shrunk. Quickly.
"O'Neill, GeneralHammond is at present time trying to locate both you and Major Carter. He has
a pressing matter to speak to both of you about."
"Yea, we got the memo." Sarcasm is key in all situations. Really it is.
"So, don't you think that we should vacate this, uh area? Considering the urgency of the
situation?"
Jonas, never one to speak the obvious.
"Uh, lets go." Carter finally speaks up, I really have to find out what's up with her today...
We turn, in what little room there is, and make our way towards the do-or which is shutting as
quickly as it was opened. From the other side.
"Guys?" Fraser. Hey the who crew is here! Now all we need is Daniel, I bet he had something to
do with this!
"Yes." Carter's the first to speak up after a loooong silence. I'm starting to break at the
pressure and warmth of the closet.
One lonely Colonel, one Randy Major, an alien with inappropriate timing, a loud Jaffa, and a
Red headed CMO. Just Dandy.
"You guys really need to get out of here!! General Hammond is looking for yo-"
"Yea yea we know, to bust our asses, we know this! We messed up, we got caught, and now we're
doing it again!!! So, if we can all gain some perspective, and if the nearest person would open
the damn door-"

Oh ______________! Brain freeze.

(CRAP. DARN. DO'H. DAMMIT. OH FUCK. BALLZ. Shitter, uh-oh, whopps a daisies.)

Please randomly pick one of the above. I lost my brain and couldn't finish it.

FEED ME FEED ME YUM! FEED ME OHH, MORE!! FEED ME FEED ME OHHH, CAKE!!! FEED ME!