TITLE: "Reprise"
AUTHOR: Doctor Strangelove (strangelove317@hotmail.com)
RATING: PG-13
PAIRINGS: None really.
SPOILERS: Up to the end of Season 6. Takes place about a month after that.
FEEDBACK: I'd love it.
DISCLAIMER: Joss owns all the Buffy characters. I own the songs they sing.
A/N: Okay, I just to say ahead of time, these may not be the actual titles of the songs, but you know which ones I mean. Also, I didn't use them all because not all of them would fit. And Act Three only had two songs in it because this one really fits with the commercial break. I'll make up for it later, one of the other acts will have four songs.

"Reprise"

Written by: Doctor Strangelove

INT. THE BRONZE - NIGHT

BUFFY

That would be me.

[Hase looks back and forth between Anya and Buffy and shrugs.]

HASE

I guess you fit the bill too.

[Buffy slowly starts to walk over to Hase.]

XANDER

Wow, I mean, I know Giles said it was a giant rabbit. But still, giant rabbit. That's new.

[Dawn and Willow nod in agreement.]

BUFFY

So, what, you came to kidnap me and got her instead?

HASE

That about covers it, yeah.

BUFFY

Well I don't give in so easily.

[Buffy brings her foot up to kick Hase in the head, but quicker than she can see he grabs her leg and throws her into the group of Scoobies near the door. She's hurt.]

HASE

Neither do I.

[Music begins to play, it sounds familiar but unnamable.]

HASE

You think you know, who you are, what's to come,
Darlings you've got no idea, haven't even begun.

[The tune changes and begins to resemble "Where Do We Go From Here?"]

HASE [cont'd]

After everything, you're still constrained by your fear,
Given so many chances, now where do you go from here?

The fighting's all done,
But the battle's just begun,
Your futures are all unclear,
Where do you go from here?

[Hase smirks and spins around as the music changes to something similar to "I'm Under Your Spell".]

But now you're under my spell,
And no begs or pleas,
Will release you from me.
I'm gonna put you all through hell.
And then I'll make you see,
You will all bow down to me,
I'll make you believe,

["Life's A Show".]

That your life's just a show,
And you are all my pawns,
And you'll do what I want,
Till the crack of dawn.

And if you don't wanna play along,
You'll forever sing these songs,
They'll just go on and on.

You'll just sing,
Non stop.
All the time,
No breaks.
Songs won't end,
No never.
I'll keep them on,
Forever and ever!

You'll be in a musical,
It'll become so dull.

Unless she comes with me,
Unless you come with me.

The Chosen One,
Give me, the Chosen One.

[Buffy stands up and goes to face her would-be captor.]

BUFFY

Again with songs,
Instead of something to sing about,
Until you tell me why I'm needed,
I'm never going to go out.

["I'll Never Tell".]

HASE

You want to know my motives, well that's too bad.
It's a big secret so you're just gonna have to be sad,
Just wait and see,
Won't get it from me,
Sworn to secrecy,
So I'll never tell.

[The giant rabbit demon laughs and smacks the Slayer down onto the floor again.]

["No Parking"]

WILLOW

We've been having
A bad, bad year,
Then you decide,
To come here,

ALL BUT HASE

We're begging you, please see,
That this isn't right, this isn't fair!
24/7 songs is quite a scare,
Don't make us go there.

Why can't you let us be?
We've paid far more than our share,
We've had it rough, don't you care?

XANDER

Hey, I'm not wearing underwear...

[The music stops and everyone turns to look at Xander.]

XANDER [cont'd]
[Spoken.]

Okay, I mean, I am wearing underwear, I just- Hey, it rhymed!

[Everyone looks at Xander before just shrugging it off and going back to the song.]

["Walk Through the Fire"]

HASE

Your puny pleads
Mean nothing to me,
I want the Chosen One,
And that's a fact.
I'll take her with me,
And then I'll make you sing,
There's no turning back.

I've flat out refused,
And you still call to me,
To makes things like they were before.
To have a normal day,
And take all this away,
Your empty pleas are quite a bore.

So I will
Take my desire,
Start up quite a commotion.
I won't,
Listen to your cries,
'Cause you're all-

["Going Through the Motions"]

HASE [cont'd]

Going through the motions,
Walking through your parts,
Won't take a chance for a fresh start.

You have always fought,
And were kind of heroic,
Been watching you for quite some time.

Then I was sought,
To help this show, it,
Felt like it could use some rhyme.

Now you'll stay this way forever,
Sing your way through life's endeavor,

DAWN

Won't you stop it?

HASE

No never.
You're all going through the motions,
Still not honest with each other,
And don't you see,
You'll never be,
Won't function as a group,
Oh, brother!

["See You In Hell"]

HASE [cont'd]

Well, this has been great,
You guys were a lot of fun.
But I best be going now,
Leave here and get some sun.

And all those things,
That you've been thinking.
Better get 'em out now,
You'll be doing a lot of singing.

But I've got this hot date,
So I had better run.

["Wish I Could Stay"]

BUFFY

It's a song,
So I must be true,
You're a demon,
And I can't stand you,
And having to leave,
Really makes me blue,
And I...

I wish I kick your ass,
But you're just too strong,
I'd finally been bested,
Should've known it all along,
And I guess you guys,
Are stuck singing songs.
God, I wish I could stay.
I just wanna stay.

[Hase lifts his arms up as mystical blue energy grows in them. A big ball is formed and Hase points it at Buffy.]

SPIKE
[Spoken.]

Buffy, watch out!

[The music ends and Buffy jumps out of the way in anticipation if the attack, but Hase just looks confused.]

HASE

Buffy?

[The blue energy blue disappears and Hase looks pissed.]

HASE [cont'd]

I knew you people were lying to me! You're not the Chosen One!

BUFFY

No, I am the Slayer.

HASE

Oh, big deal. The Chosen One isn't someone as average as a Slayer.

XANDER

Wait, if you've been watching us for a while, wouldn't you know that she wasn't who you were looking for.

HASE

I'm from another plain of existence. I was watching your emotions and feelings. I was just getting your heart's emotions, not names. I knew you people still hadn't changed since Sweet came because of that. That's why I was going to make you sing forever. Wolfram & Hart sent me to get the Chosen One, who has apparently gone missing. They knew she had been seen around here before, so they summoned me to find someone of a strong magical influence.

DAWN

Well, since you didn't find her, does that you'll stop the musical spell?

HASE

Oh, no, that's still going. You people disgust me. You were given a warning about keeping secrets and now you're gonna face your punishment. As for the Chosen One, it may not have been Buffy over there, should've known it wasn't her, you weren't that good a singer. Anyway, I found the Chosen One.

[Before anyone can do anything to stop him, Hase grabs Anya.]

HASE [cont'd]

I knew it was her all along.

[There is a loud blue flash and the two are gone.]

GILES

Anya.

[The Scoobies stand around in silence for moment before Buffy walks over and picks up the scroll Hase had been reading earlier.]

BUFFY

So this is how he knew it wasn't me.

[She walks over to the gang.]

BUFFY [cont'd]

Well, better pack our bags. We're going to L.A.

GILES

What?

[Buffy hands her former watcher the scroll to read.]

GILES [cont'd]

Oh, my God.

[The camera turns to look at the scroll and we can see scrawled in black letters the description of the Chosen One Hase described earlier, but above all that a name. Cordelia Chase.]

END OF ACT THREE