3.
This chapter contains some dark stuff,so I'm raising the rating to
PG just in case. This is what I do best,what a friend of mine
calls "mining the recesses of the psyche."
Rupert: Yes,it's certainly shaping up that way.
Princess and Aeryn: Glad ya laughed. It'll be funny again,I swear.
Fantasy Cat: I promise you won't be disappointed.
Christine: Thanks for the encouragement!
jasmin flower: I thought it was perfect for Snape..."Generals
gathered in their MAS-SES...Just like WITCHES at black MAS-ESSSSS..."
I think he'd like Type O Negative and Acid Bath,because they're
both heavily influenced by Sabbath.
Barbarataku: Wow. Guess I better get to work,then. Here we go:
"-so this kid comes up on the porch,right? And he's ringing my doorbell yelling TWICK OR TWEAT and I can't come to the door because I'm not finished killing the guy-"
"Why were you strangling him again?"
"Garroting. Not strangling. There is a difference. The truth is that
I find it intellectually stimulating. Murder,I mean. I've killed
fifteen people,all in drastically different ways. Tonight,I garroted
Mr. Campbell with piano wire,adding to my ever-growing repertoire. I
could write a manual,I really could. 'Five Hundred Ways To Kill Muggle Filth' and the very first page would just read 'Method Number One.' in block letters."
"One less neighbor,I suppose."
"I mean,sometimes I feel like I depend on the Cruciatis curse too
much,Lucius. Of course,I abuse the Killing Curse like it's going
out of style. I just wanted to experience the act with my own two
hands."
"How did it feel?"
"...great. It felt great."
"Did you kill the kid,too?"
"Nah. By the time Mr. Campbell finally kicked it,the kid gave up and
left. Good thing for him,too. I have a nasty habit of getting rough
with kids. Don't know what it is. I'm not a pedophile or anything-
that's one thing even Voldemort despises-it's just that I get these
weird...urges...sometimes-"
I really truly hate this man, Lucius thought. He had never told
the man his name,but he supposed his name preceded him,as it was
wont to do. This man was not a handsome man; he was ratty,
unkempt,thin-faced and pale. His eyes were watery and reddish.
Lucius wouldn't have been surprised if he were a junkie.
"But you've killed children,have you?"
"Of COURSE I kill children. I wouldn't be here if I weren't."
He eyeballed Lucius.
"You have a kid at Hogwarts,don't you?"
That's IT,Lucius thought; he siezed his companion by his shirtfront
and wrapped his left leg around the other man's. He toppled to the
ground,leaves crunching under him. Lucius landed on top of him. He
straddled his companion,digging both knees into his sides.
"Listen,you degenerate pervert," he growled,"I may be a Death Eater,
but I have my limits and you're treading on them. I do have a son
at Hogwarts. I love my son. Sometimes he can be a real pain in the
arse,but he's my SON and I would go stark staring mad if anything
happened to him. You know those cosmic gods H. P. Lovecraft was always going on about? If you don't shut up, I'll summon 'em. They're bad boys and they love tricks as much as they love treats."
"Really,Lucius."
Lucius looked up.
Voldemort stood over them. But he looked strange-
"Why are you dressed like a clown,Lord Voldemort?"
"It is Halloween,Lucius." He took a bite of the Snickers Cruncher
bar he was holding. "You know,for muggle candy,this tastes good."
"Lord Voldemort,I would like to say something." Lucius got to his feet. "I am vehemently opposed to working with this individual."
Voldemort sighed. "What's the problem,Lucius?"
"I find his presence highly emetic,that's what. He's a disgusting
individual,a danger to himself and others,particularly me,and I
am shocked-SHOCKED-that you would-"
Voldemort waved his hand,and Lucius felt his feet leave the ground.
"Are you questioning my wisdom,Lucius?"
"I-"
Voldemort placed his palm flat against Lucius's forhead and pushed.
Lucius gasped; in a moment,his feet were dangling in the air and
his face rested inches from the ground.
"You know better than that," Voldemort said,almost singing.
He waved his hand again. Lucius fell to the ground.
"I'm aware of your partner's proclivities,Lucius. You know I always
do know. He slaughters children. You and I can identify with that.
He's also a heroin addict,yes,but since when did being a self-destructive junkhead restrict anyone from being a Death Eater? You will work together and you will like it,Lucius. Now get up."
Lucius got to his feet. His nameless partner swayed a bit when
he stood up.
Voldemort handed them each an automatic weapon.
"These are called Uzis," Voldemort said. "You are to go into the
forest with only these. They fire something like eighty rounds of
ammunition a second. You will make your way through the forest and
kill everybody you can on the other side. If you must kill the boy,
make sure Dumbledore witnesses it."
"It'll be a bloodbath,my lord," Lucius said.
"Excellent. Now,gentlemen,I leave the night in your hands...I have some trick-or-treating to do."
He Disapparated.
"Why does Dumbledore have to see the boy die?"
"Because Voldemort is afraid-" Lucius couldn't say it,so he tried
a different approach. "The best way to kill Dumbledore is to
murder Harry Potter. It's just Voldemort's way of breaking Dumbledore
over his knee."
"Cold but effective."
"Personally,I'm saving a bullet for Snape."
This chapter contains some dark stuff,so I'm raising the rating to
PG just in case. This is what I do best,what a friend of mine
calls "mining the recesses of the psyche."
Rupert: Yes,it's certainly shaping up that way.
Princess and Aeryn: Glad ya laughed. It'll be funny again,I swear.
Fantasy Cat: I promise you won't be disappointed.
Christine: Thanks for the encouragement!
jasmin flower: I thought it was perfect for Snape..."Generals
gathered in their MAS-SES...Just like WITCHES at black MAS-ESSSSS..."
I think he'd like Type O Negative and Acid Bath,because they're
both heavily influenced by Sabbath.
Barbarataku: Wow. Guess I better get to work,then. Here we go:
"-so this kid comes up on the porch,right? And he's ringing my doorbell yelling TWICK OR TWEAT and I can't come to the door because I'm not finished killing the guy-"
"Why were you strangling him again?"
"Garroting. Not strangling. There is a difference. The truth is that
I find it intellectually stimulating. Murder,I mean. I've killed
fifteen people,all in drastically different ways. Tonight,I garroted
Mr. Campbell with piano wire,adding to my ever-growing repertoire. I
could write a manual,I really could. 'Five Hundred Ways To Kill Muggle Filth' and the very first page would just read 'Method Number One.' in block letters."
"One less neighbor,I suppose."
"I mean,sometimes I feel like I depend on the Cruciatis curse too
much,Lucius. Of course,I abuse the Killing Curse like it's going
out of style. I just wanted to experience the act with my own two
hands."
"How did it feel?"
"...great. It felt great."
"Did you kill the kid,too?"
"Nah. By the time Mr. Campbell finally kicked it,the kid gave up and
left. Good thing for him,too. I have a nasty habit of getting rough
with kids. Don't know what it is. I'm not a pedophile or anything-
that's one thing even Voldemort despises-it's just that I get these
weird...urges...sometimes-"
I really truly hate this man, Lucius thought. He had never told
the man his name,but he supposed his name preceded him,as it was
wont to do. This man was not a handsome man; he was ratty,
unkempt,thin-faced and pale. His eyes were watery and reddish.
Lucius wouldn't have been surprised if he were a junkie.
"But you've killed children,have you?"
"Of COURSE I kill children. I wouldn't be here if I weren't."
He eyeballed Lucius.
"You have a kid at Hogwarts,don't you?"
That's IT,Lucius thought; he siezed his companion by his shirtfront
and wrapped his left leg around the other man's. He toppled to the
ground,leaves crunching under him. Lucius landed on top of him. He
straddled his companion,digging both knees into his sides.
"Listen,you degenerate pervert," he growled,"I may be a Death Eater,
but I have my limits and you're treading on them. I do have a son
at Hogwarts. I love my son. Sometimes he can be a real pain in the
arse,but he's my SON and I would go stark staring mad if anything
happened to him. You know those cosmic gods H. P. Lovecraft was always going on about? If you don't shut up, I'll summon 'em. They're bad boys and they love tricks as much as they love treats."
"Really,Lucius."
Lucius looked up.
Voldemort stood over them. But he looked strange-
"Why are you dressed like a clown,Lord Voldemort?"
"It is Halloween,Lucius." He took a bite of the Snickers Cruncher
bar he was holding. "You know,for muggle candy,this tastes good."
"Lord Voldemort,I would like to say something." Lucius got to his feet. "I am vehemently opposed to working with this individual."
Voldemort sighed. "What's the problem,Lucius?"
"I find his presence highly emetic,that's what. He's a disgusting
individual,a danger to himself and others,particularly me,and I
am shocked-SHOCKED-that you would-"
Voldemort waved his hand,and Lucius felt his feet leave the ground.
"Are you questioning my wisdom,Lucius?"
"I-"
Voldemort placed his palm flat against Lucius's forhead and pushed.
Lucius gasped; in a moment,his feet were dangling in the air and
his face rested inches from the ground.
"You know better than that," Voldemort said,almost singing.
He waved his hand again. Lucius fell to the ground.
"I'm aware of your partner's proclivities,Lucius. You know I always
do know. He slaughters children. You and I can identify with that.
He's also a heroin addict,yes,but since when did being a self-destructive junkhead restrict anyone from being a Death Eater? You will work together and you will like it,Lucius. Now get up."
Lucius got to his feet. His nameless partner swayed a bit when
he stood up.
Voldemort handed them each an automatic weapon.
"These are called Uzis," Voldemort said. "You are to go into the
forest with only these. They fire something like eighty rounds of
ammunition a second. You will make your way through the forest and
kill everybody you can on the other side. If you must kill the boy,
make sure Dumbledore witnesses it."
"It'll be a bloodbath,my lord," Lucius said.
"Excellent. Now,gentlemen,I leave the night in your hands...I have some trick-or-treating to do."
He Disapparated.
"Why does Dumbledore have to see the boy die?"
"Because Voldemort is afraid-" Lucius couldn't say it,so he tried
a different approach. "The best way to kill Dumbledore is to
murder Harry Potter. It's just Voldemort's way of breaking Dumbledore
over his knee."
"Cold but effective."
"Personally,I'm saving a bullet for Snape."