Copyright © 2002 by Syvia & Demon Hunter Anamae. All Rights Reserved.
Disclaimer: Previous disclaimers apply. We own ourselves and the Narrator. Bucky the former chipmunk was inspired by the squirrel from The Emperor's New Groove.
Crazy Dragon is responsible for the appearance of Janos' Porn Star T-shirt, as she was the one to draw him wearing it. *smirks*
Author's Notes: *Syvia and Anamae are sitting in the Astronomy Tower, late at night, serenaded by the sounds of young Hogwarts students smooching in the darkened corners and the bubble of cauldrons as a smattering of Slytherins cook up evil spells*
Anamae- As there is a touch of smut in this chapter, this is an appropriate place to be to announce it. :-p Thirteen reviews!
Syvia- We're so honored!
Anamae- First letter- Hello Bahamut Epyon- ^_^ Yes! And now even more madness! No one can stop us!! *evil laughter* ...Except for bunnies! *begins singing the bunny song with fireworks going off behind her*
Syvia- *A bit singed* Alright Anamae. Hello Plink- ^_^ Pink hot pants... *drools*
Anamae- VladimirsAngel- *Syvia sends her a GLOMP in the mail* ^_^ I loved that solution.... I wrote that solution. Thanks!
Syvia- Helloooo Templar! *nods* Very good, I see nothiiiiiing. :-D Thanks! And to Chalcedony Blue- Thank you! *lol* See- Bucky indeed began life as a chipmunk, but as Anamae & I both were thinking of the squirrel from The Emperor's New Groove while writing about him, when I accidentally began to call him a squirrel, it took us a while to notice.
Anamae- Then Syvia made a joke about the mistake, and instead of making Bucky a squirrel from the beginning, or keeping him a chipmunk throughout the fic, we left the joke in. ^_^ P.S.: Yes, Rahab is very cute, and please check out Wellspring of the Universe! ^_^ Next- to Evelin The Winged... Syv?
Syvia- I e-mailed you, hon, but again, I promise I am working on RB. Fics like LoK Fluff and WCWN are just easier to write and post. That's why this chapter is up before chapter ten of Restoring Balance.
Anamae- That and we promised that every ten reviews would earn a new chapter. Next is an unsigned review- Thank you very much! To The Cat of Fluff- ^_^ *Bucky looks worried* Just don't kill him, okay? *hugs the Platinum Seal*
Syvia- To Rocker Baby- *grins* Thank you! *cringes in mock-terror* Oooooh, the SPOON! *dramatic moozak*
Anamae- What was that?
Syvia- It was dramatic moozak.
Anamae- Oh. Next, to Shady- *grins* Oh, you have to love that Clan Lord. Dumah gets a bad rap, but deep down he needs some love and cuddling. Dumah fangirl *points to herself* all the way!!!!
Syvia- To Discordia- It does indeed and thank you! You were number eighty. ^_^ *throws her another box of sweets*
Anamae- To Bahamut- *looks a little dazed after the encounter with Glasya* Uh... thank.. you. *smiles confusedly* Now I'm gonna sit over here and look the other way. *looks at a rock* Oooh, interesting...
Syvia- To Temperamence- *smiles modestly* We try.
Anamae- But I do a better job. ^_^ *receives a look from Syvia* What?
Chapter 9
The Amazing Technicolor Wardrobe of Janos Audron
Bucky- Squeak squeakity. ( How come I wasn't mentioned?)
Where?
Bucky- Squeaker squeaken squeak. (When Janos mentioned the great evil aliens?)
Anamae- Aliens?! Aliens are after Janos too?! Aww, damnit! If it isn't one thing, it's another!
Syvia- *reminiscent of Mario from the SMB movie* Anamae- we're the aliens!
Anamae- We are? Cool! *thinks about changing her skin color to red*
So the girls kept walking, unbothered until they reached the frozen pond surrounding Janos' Retreat. They stood at the far edge and surveyed the area.
Anamae- *with binoculars* Okay, there's a little island over to that side that looks like it's about 4 meters-
That's not what I meant!
Syvia- *tosses her clipboard and pencil into a plot hole* I knew that!
Anamae- Again- how are we gonna get in there?
The two looked up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up-
Anamae, Syvia & Bucky- WE GET THE POINT!
To the balcony at the top of the mountain- Where Janos was doing cool-down exercises after his workout. He was wearing a pair of grey short-shorts and his 'porn-star' T-shirt and-
Anamae- *looking through the binoculars, catcalls* Take it off, baby!
Syvia- *reaching for the binoculars* Let me see!
She grabbed the binoculars and whistled as well.
Syvia- *singing* Do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight-
Both- Get down tonight!
They continued singing and Anamae reached over to take back the binoculars. The girls then had a five minute fight over them before they slipped in the snow, dropping the binoculars over the cliff and onto the ice below-
Anamae- No problem! I'll get them back. *walks over to the cliff*
Errr... *ahem* dropping them over a cliff and into the water below.
Syvia- *to the narrator* Heyyyy!
Can we move along please?
Anamae- Fine. How do we get in? *whispers behind her hand* Hopefully before he's done with the workout?
Syvia- Well, Raz is already inside the Retreat and any minute now he's gonna- *BOOM!!!!!*
The girls swayed as a wall of rock exploded outward from the base of the Retreat.
Anamae- 'any minute he's gonna' do that?
Syvia nodded, a wry expression on her face.
Anamae- *grinning* Trust Raz to make a good entrance... or is that exit? Either way, let's get in there.
Syvia- Oh wait! That's right, we can't get in that way until Raz is done.
Anamae- Why?
Syvia- Well he needs to solve a bunch of puzzles to make a path that flightless people can use.
Anamae- That's no problem.
She promptly opened a plot hole and pulled out two jet packs.
Anamae- We can just use these. We don't need to wait for anyone, Syv- there's always an open door... or window. *she grins*
Syvia grinned, then grimaced.
Syvia- But there's a door in there that only Raz can open.
Anamae- *shouldering her pack* We'll burn that bridge when we come to it.
The girls made ready and put their hands to the starting buttons, then- wait. *sighs* I just can't take it anymore.
Syvia- Whassamatter?
You two have jet packs. You could just fly from here to his balcony. Why don't you do that?
Anamae- The narrator is making sense. *pouts* I don't like it when things make sense.
Bucky- *chitters in amusement*
The girls grinned sheepishly, shrugged and launched into the air, aiming for Janos' private chamber. Syvia and Anamae went blasting up to Janos' room, hitting various parts of their bodies on the cliff wall and sculpture because they didn't know how to operate the jetpacks all that well. Anamae tossed Bucky down onto the balcony, then landed and raced out of the way as Syvia careened, out of control, into the room. She slid along the floor, past three priceless vases (which got broken) and onto the Persian rug, which slid through the door and into the room where Janos was cooling down from his exercises, still wearing his extremely yummylicious outfit.
Janos looked at Syvia. Syvia looked at Janos.
Janos- And you are?
Well, Syvia blushed at him. Hell, the Ancient was over 3000 years old but he didn't look it and as far as Syvia was concerned he was opened for 'hunting'.... The kind that involved a rope instead of a gun... *wink wink*
Syvia- Narrator, shut up!
Make me!
Anamae- *innocently* Indeed, Syvia is blushing quite a bit and she's been looking at Janos for a fairly long time now...
Syvia- Anamae!! -_-
Anamae- What?! *innocently* I'm just standing here, minding my own business... looking at the hottie...
Syvia- Anamae!!!!
Janos- *looking confused* Excuse me, but why are you ladies here?
Anamae- *politely* Well Janos we're here because we need to save you from the Sarafan who're coming to kill you.
Janos- O-kkkkkkaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy.... While I appreciate the thought, I assure you both that I am perfectly safe. I cannot die until I've passed the Reaver on to the next guardian.
Syvia- And the Guardian in question is Raziel, right?
Janos looked at them curiously.
Janos- Yes, actually... how did you know?
Anamae- *bright, distracting smile* That's not really important! What is important is that Raz is about to get here and the Sarafan will be right behind him. *begins to talk faster* And after the Sarafan kill you, Vorador's gonna kill the circle, and Raz is gonna kill the Sarafan, and Malek's gonna *grandiose announcer voice* 'swear to wreak vengence upon him' and-
Syvia- Anamae, Anamae- calm down.
Anamae, breathing heavily, nodded at Syvia.
Janos- *looking around* Who's that?
Anamae- *gasping* Our... narrator...
Hi, Janos! And Janos waved, somewhat confusedly, towards my voice. *happy grin* Inn't he sweet? But then part of what Anamae had said pierced Janos' brain.
Janos- Ow...
Bucky- *monotone* Squeak, squeaky. (That was a cheap laugh.)
Janos looked slightly hurt, but returned to the matter at hand.
Janos- Raziel is coming? Really?! *runs off*
Syvia- Where are you going?
Janos- I have to change my outfit!
Anamae- *incredulous* What?!
The Ancient walked back into the room and gestured to his shorts and t-shirt.
Janos- I am not going to meet my successor wearing this.
Anamae- Why not? You look good. *leers at him* I think I speak for all the girls when I say-
Syvia- Anamae.
Anamae- You'd say it too, don't try to deny it.
Syvia only glared at her friend. Oh, come on, girl, you know you would.
Syvia- Shut up.
*mockingly* Shut up.
Then Syvia threateningly pulled out a roll of duct tape and glared at- okay, I get the hint. Meanwhile, Anamae had inched over to the doorway of Janos' closet. Her mouth fell open.
Syvia- What are you doing!?
Anamae- Syv, you've got to see this!
Syvia- No!
Anamae- This is fascinating! Syv, get over here!
Anamae finally had to drag her modest- *raspberry* modest my ass.
Syvia- *to the fourth wall* Watch it, buddy.
*whistles innocently* -friend over to the door. They both looked. Syvia's eyebrows rose and she let out a gasp. They were both silent for a time, awed expressions on their faces. The girls tilted their heads to the side just a bit, adjusting their view.
Syvia- ...So that's how he gets his vests over his wings!
Janos ran out with an outfit on, to test its appeal with the two girls. He was- oh Gods. *stifling laughter* He walked out wearing a pair of hot pink trousers and a neon orange vest.
Janos- What do you think?
*continuing to stifle her laughter* The girls looked at each other.
Syvia & Anamae- Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Anamae- Um Janos...
Syvia- With all due respect...
Anamae- Maybe you should go for something...
Syvia- More serious. Since such a formal event...
Anamae- Is about to take place.
Janos looked at the two girls, then at his clothing.
Janos- What is wrong with this?
Syvia- Look, you have to be dignified when you meet Raziel and that outfit just doesn't...complement your beautiful physique.
Anamae- Yeah, Janos. *light bulb moment* I'll help you dress!!!!
Anamae latched onto the Ancient's arm and dragged him back into the room. Syvia had an idea of what Anamae meant by 'helping Janos dress' but she didn't know if she really wanted to look or-
Syvia- *incredulous look* What do you mean? Of course I want to look!
Oh, okay then. So Syvia ran after Anamae and Janos. The three stood in his changing room, where Anamae was pulling pieces of clothing out of his wardrobe, tossing them onto the floor while Janos stood behind the screen, buck neekid!
Anamae- *holding up a blue robe* Not dignified enough. *tosses it, then comes up with leather pants* Always a winner. *folds them over her arm then takes out the white over robe* Ka-CHING! Here's something you can wear, Janos!
She grabbed the clothing and dashed behind the changing screen, giving a knowing wink to Syvia.
Bucky- Squueak? (Do I want to know what's about to happen?)
Oh come on now Bucky, you know I don't think you're that stupid. Giggling came from behind the changing screen. Oh Syvia, it looks like you're not in on the fun!
Syvia- *rolling up her sleeves* We'll see about that. I'm just as hot-blooded as Anamae is!
And with that said, Syvia dove behind the screen to help Janos *ahem* change into his more dignified clothing.
Janos- *in a somewhat panicked voice* Ladies, I think I can get changed by- *starts laughing* stop tickling me...I can change myself you know! *starts laughing again* *gasps* Hey, that's unwanted touching!!!!!
Come Bucky, let's leave them alone. I might hurl my lunch if I have to hear or narrate that any longer. So Bucky and I left the trio alone....gawd, horny young women nowadays!
Anamae & Syvia: SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Doorbell rings*
Soul Reaver Raz: *standing outside the door* Hellooooooooo!!! Janos, are you home? I came all this way to receive the information you possess!!! *Hears giggling inside the room* But maybe I came at a bad time....
====================================
Syvia- To smut... or not to smut... that is the question!
Anamae- Which isn't a question at all, really. ^_^
Syvia- Get us to 90 reviews-
Anamae- Or even further! We won't mind!
Syvia- and see what happens next! :-D
Anamae- *nod nod nod* Okay Syvia, I pass the torch to you. You write the smut, I write the fighting, that's the way this partnership goes.
Syvia- *laughs* So long as we both write the comedy. ^_^ *Takes the torch solemnly and begins running with it. She suddenly trips and falls flat on her face, still holding the torch up.* ...Ow. *Stumbles to her feet and hands Anamae the torch*
Anamae- I got the torch! I got it!!! *loses the torch and it falls into the water* ...Damn it.... Okay, if that's any indication, maybe there won't be smut in the next chapter.
Syvia- ...Maybe there'll be fighting?
*both shrug*