Copyright © 2002 by Syvia & Demon Hunter Anamae. All Rights Reserved.
Disclaimer: Previous disclaimers apply. We own ourselves and the Narrator. Bucky the former chipmunk was inspired by the squirrel from The Emperor's New Groove.
Crazy Dragon is responsible for the appearance of Janos' Porn Star T-shirt, as she was the one to draw him wearing it.
Author's Notes: *Syvia and Anamae are deep in the Forbidden Forest, having tea with Firenze, a stack of letters on the felled tree they're using as a table*
Syvia- Reviews! ^_^ Ten nice reviews *flips them out* First to Raziella D. Reaver- Who sent us two! Thanks, hon. ^_^ Here's the next chapter.
Anamae- Shady- ^_^ Oh no, the short-shorts were lovely! Don't worry too much about Raz- *smirks* To Rocker Baby- We'll see. ^_^ *takes a sip of her tea, which is laced with Stagni*
Syvia- To Plink- ^_^ *lmao* Too right. But don't worry, Raz will have some attention. ^_^
Anamae- Concept of a Demon- Okay! Okay! Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay! Please stop shouting! My ears are sensitive but we're glad all the same that you are enjoying this shameless round of LoK bashing.
Syvia- Fallen Templar- ^_^ Thanks, buddy! Can't wait to see your stuff on here. :-D
Anamae- To VladimirsAngel- *snickers* Sorry about that. Yes- he always looks good in the leather. *drools*
Syvia- *waits patiently for Raz to come back, he does* ^_^ Okay, now we can begin the chapter. *waves goodbye to VA* :-D
Anamae- Morbid Knight- You got it!
Syvia- Chalcedony Blue- *lol* You are absolutely right! This is what I've been saying during the whole fic! :-D
Chapter 10
The Poor Huffy Narrator and the Morons She Puts Up With
Raziel had finally resorted to using the doorbell. He rang it once, then twice, then started to tap out a melody. All were ignored by the giggling trio. Bucky had fallen asleep, but was jolted awake by the sudden quickening pace of the doorbell melody.
Bucky- *chitters angrily*
He looked towards the changing screen, tilting his head in confusion at the odd-looking shadows cast by the three gigglers. Bucky shook his head in annoyance and scampered to the door. After looking for a moment at the door he climbed up the side and jumped up and down on the doorknob. The door opened and Raziel walked in.
Raziel- Janos...Audron?
Raziel looked around, his eyebrows rose and he tried again.
Raziel- Janos Audron? ...Are you home?
Then he turned and caught sight of Bucky.
Raziel- You wouldn't happen to know where-
Bucky chittered pleasantly at him and pointed towards the screen. Raziel nodded and thanked the squirrel before heading for the relevant area. ...Bucky...
Bucky- Squea? (Yes?)
Why didn't you warn him about what's going on back there?
Bucky- *evil little grin*
Raziel- *poking his head around the screen* Janos Audron, I-
*gasp* What on earth are you three doing?!
Anamae- What? It's fun!
Syvia- C'mon, I bet you've never done this before!
Janos- Raziel, my child- come and join us. This is an odd activity, but interesting... although I have something of a disadvantage...
Anamae- Depends entirely on which way you're facing. The position I'm in right here? Very comfortable.
Syvia- Uh... I think I'm getting a cramp in my back.
Raziel shrugged and walked behind the screen. *snickers* The giggling continued, with a new voice added.
*a few hours later*
Bucky had fallen asleep again. Unfortunately, a very annoyed Moebius had rounded up the Sarafan Six and was personally leading them up to Janos' chambers. Bucky raised his head slowly and blinked bleary eyes at the ranting and raving Time Streamer.
Bucky- *confused* Squeak? (What?)
Moebius- *At the door* See?! There's their foul chipmunk!
Bucky- Squeakin! (Squirell!)
That's not how you spell Squirrel.
Bucky- Squea? (Oh?)
Moebius- But out, narrator!
Well I never! *pouts* Fine then! I'm not going to narrate at all, then you'll see how bad the story becomes without me! I'm gonna go and have a pity tea party for myself. *sniffle*
Sarafan Rahab- Awww, don't be that way.
Sarafan Turel- Eh, forget about her. We don't need a narrator.
*clunk, clunk, clunk*
Sarafan Zephon- What the hell is that?
*clunk, clunk, clunk*
Sarafan Turel- The sound of something going 'clunk'.
Sarafan Zephon- *sarcastically* No kidding.
Sarafan Dumah- I'm guessing it's the sound of Moebius walking over to the changing screen. *whispers* The old perv.
Sarafan Raziel- That's more than a little ridiculous, isn't it?
Sarafan Melchiah- Well he pissed off the Narrator. All we've got are crappy sound effects and dialogue.
Moebius- Oh shut up, all of you! *WOOSH*
*Gasps*
Anamae- What?! What is it?!
Sarafan Melchiah- You're, the four of you are-
Syvia- We're playing 'Twister'. You have a problem?
Janos- We're in quite an amusing array of positions here... why isn't anyone describing them?
Sarafan Turel- Moebius angered the Narrator.
SR Raziel- MOEBIUS?!
*screams and shouts*
Anamae- Ow! My collarbone!
Syvia- Ughhh. Damn, Raz, could you give us a few seconds to get untangled next time?
SR Raz- Sorry.
*extended silence*
Anamae- Narrator? Narrator...? Oh come on Narrator, please come back! The story isn't the same without you.
Sarafan Dumah- Yeah, you won't be able to harp on and on about my greatness, which is pretty great all by itself!
Sarafan Melchiah- We need to have a running description and let's face it, without you the story isn't the same. Don't listen to Moebius, he's just a jerk.
Moebius- Hey!
SR Raziel- It's the truth. I was hoping you'd narrate the funny predicament I was in with Syvia, it was almost like a 69 and-
Sarafan Rahab- Alright! Too much information there!!!
Syvia- Come back, please?
Well, all right, since it seems I have so many fans. ^_^ Okay, now on with the story.
Sarafan Zephon- Woo-hoo! Now we can finally move on to the good stuff.
Moebius looked over at SR Raziel, Janos, Anamae and Syvia standing side by side. Behind the Time Streamer were the six lieutenants, who had somehow managed to pull themselves out of the canyon and complete the crossword puzzle at the same time.
Sarafan Rahab- *smirking* The magic word in today's crossword was 'Martyr'. Why do I have a feeling someone is about to become one?
Moebius- *evil grin* Kill Janos!
Janos- Why do you want to kill me?
Sarafan Raziel- Because you are a menace to society! You haven't paid your taxes in years! You haven't even taken a weekend with the Pain Monster because of that!
SR Raziel- Shut up, past self of me!
Sarafan Raziel- *shocked* What did you say?
Syvia- Yeah, what did you say? Because that sentence was pretty bad, grammatically speaking, and I'm sure you broke about five-
Anamae- *clearing her throat* Excuse me, I'll clear all of this up. Sarafan Raziel, this guy over here all in blue and with the cowl across his face is you in the future. See, what happens is that if you guys kill Janos here, and take the Soul Reaver, then this Raziel will follow you back to the fortress and kill you one by one.
Syvia- Then Kain, a nobleman who will be born about 530 years after your deaths, will resurrect you all as vampires when he becomes the ruler of Nosgoth. You'll become the one thing that you don't want to become! Moebius already knows about all of this and he thinks it's a worthy sacrifice. You're all-
Anamae & Syvia- Doomed if you continue down this road and kill Janos.
Moebius- WHAT?! You girls have ruined my plots, my careful plans and preparations, which have taken years and years-
Then Moebius looked at the Sarafan Warlords and realized that with the looks they were giving him, he didn't have to worry about any well-laid plans. All he had to worry about was getting out alive.
Sarafan Turel- *amazed* You were going to have us killed?
Sarafan Zephon- *glaring* You bastard.
Sarafan Dumah- *hands clenched on the hilt of his sword* I will kill you where you stand... and I will make it slow... and extremely painful!
Sarafan Raziel- And I will not be turned into that! *points to SR Raziel*
SR Raziel- HEY! I resent that!
Anamae- *smirking* So, is everyone in agreement on taking out Moebius?
Everyone (including me!) agreed and charged after the Time Streamer.
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Syvia- *sighs* Ech- no smut then. *smirks* Just innuendo. ^_^
Anamae- And in the next chapter! *ding ding* Moebius Torture!!! *and the crowd goes wild*
Syvia- One hundred reviews or further, please. ^_^
Moebius- Don't you ladies for once wish not to harm a defenseless old man such as I? Do you even want to know why I'm doing this? Don't you even care?!
Anamae & Syvia- *They think about it for a minute* ....NO!!! *they pelt Moebius with tomatoes*