AN: This is notmine my friend sent it to me so I'm posting it. Don't own don't sue The Real Ron Weasley

[Ron]

May I have your attention please?

May I have your attention please?

Will the real Ron Weasley please stand up?

I repeat, will the real Ron Weasley please stand up?

Okay, you're gonna make me use my wand...

You're staring like you never seen a Weasley before

Jaws all on the floor like Lily when Voldie just burst in the door

And started messin' with Harry til his head was sore Created a war. Slow down! Why you killin' everybody around? (Ahh!)

It's the return of the... "Oh, man, it's him, you're kidding,

I thought baby Harry killed him back then, didn't he?"

And Severus Snape said âE" no way, he ain't my mate

Snape only scowls and he's always irate! (Ha-ha!)

Hermione G. really loves me:

{*vocal turntable: chigga chigga chigga*}

"Ron Weasley, when you gonna see?

I can't believe, sitting around on your you-know-what

Cussin' out You-Know-Who."

"Geez, Hermione, who asked you?"

Yeah, I can whoop ass with a chess piece

With a wizard like me, you won't need no pol-ice

Think I'm gonna get busted for disturbing the peace, but no

Cuz if I wasn't here, all the fun would decrease

"Scabbers is my rat! Scabbers is my rat!"

And he's always freakin' out about Granger's huge cat

It's not Scabbers, it's Pettigrew âE" if I'd'a known that

I would've squished his little ass âE" it's not to laugh at

Oh, sure, Malfoy rips on me because I'm poor

And my hair's a furry carrot

But at least I'm not a bouncing ferret

That dude Gilderoy Lockhart? He makes me wanna fart

He's smart... NOT! And he looks like a donkey's part

Trelawney's star charts make me wanna fall apart

I'd rather be hanging with Hagrid's Skrewts, for the most part {*EWWW!*}

Between the Boy Who's Scarred and Miss Report Card

Who's the coolest? And don't call Scotland Yard, cuz it's not hard

Chorus

I'm Ron Weasley, yes I'm the coolest Weasley

And all you other people are just jealous of me

So won't the real Ron Weasley please stand up?

Please stand up, please stand up?

I'm Ron Weasley, yes I'm the coolest Weasley

And all you other people are just jealous of me

So won't the real Ron Weasley please stand up?

Please stand up, please stand up?

[Ron]

Malfoy don't gotta scrimp and save to buy some dress robes

Well, I do âE" so screw him and his swotty Daddy, too

You think I give a crap about who's Pureblood?

Hermione G.'s a total stud, and she sure don't look like mud!

"But Ron, bad stuff's going on! Aren't you scared?"

No! Well... of Cruicio... but, you know, Harry's always prepared

Hell, ain't he always prepared in the adventures we've shared?

Never mind that the kid's totally visually impaired

You'd think he could fix that problem with a spell

But I bet he thinks his specs fit his character well

And Danny Radcliffe can't wear contacts anyway

Much to them purist Potterphiles' dismay

Eyes that aren't emerald green are not okay

But when Danny smiles, they all sigh and start to sway {*Oooo!*}

Y'all gonna give me some credit? I'm Brit âE" I won't become a git

I'm not dumb, committed to Harry, and Hermione âE" she's it {*smooch*}

There ain't a one of you who's just like me

Hair of rust, like me, who start to combust like me

Who dress like me; rebel, spell, and scare like me

Don't fuss! See, you don't cut it, so shut it, it's all me!

Chorus

[Ron]

My Dad is, like, the coolest ever, and Percy's always being clever

Bill and Charlie with their curses and dragons endeavor

And the twins always jokin' about something

Mum trying to be lovin' but pissed off at 'em for explodin'

Some of her favorite china dishes or somethin'

And Ginny's over there wonderin' {*ERR*} blunderin'

Writing in Riddle's book like she's got no love

Hey Ginny, I'm your bro, listen yo, I love you, get a clue

I say: if you're sad, don't be, trust me, there's no delay

Harry saves the day, it's okay, us three, we don't run away,

Wavin' my wand and trying Windgardium Leviosa

Charms like this is harder than understanding Spinoza

But everybody I see is a Ron wannabe,

Polyjuicing into me âE" they can't âE" crying like a banshee {*WAAH!*}

Cuz only I can kick Death Eater butt

Hanging out at Hagrid's hut, telling Voldemort he sucks

Fighting with my wand drawn and calling out, "Yo, whassup?"

So will the cool Weasley please stand up?

And roll those lacy robe sleeves on each hand up?

And be glad to be the lad with Harry and rad Hermione

No canaries, bad-ass Weasley âE" yeah, I do decree that

I'm Ron Weasley, yes I'm the coolest Weasley

And all you other people are just jealous of me

So won't the real Ron Weasley please stand up?

Please stand up, please stand up?

Ha ha

Guess there's a Ron Weasley in all of us

Screw this, let's go play some chess...