The Price of Love

Chapter Four

Rinoa's POV

I just sit still, captivated by his face. I expect him to open those beautiful eyes at any moment. But it isn't happening. I've waited three days now. Squall, please come back to me.

It's almost more agonizing to see him like this. He looks so miserable.

As I stare at his pale skin, I hear the door open.

I expect another doctor, but it's Irvine. He's come to visit, I guess.

"Hey Rinny." He says to me softly. "How's Squall?"

I sigh, "Still not awake."

He sits down in a chair across from me, on the other side of Squall's bed.

I look at him, "This is all my fault, Irvine. If it wasn't for me, he would be fine. He was right, I should've died in space."

Irvine looked shocked, "He said that to you?"

"We were fighting. I know he didn't mean it, but it was true."

Irvine shakes his head. "No, Rinoa. That is not true. If it wasn't for you coming here, Squall probably would've committed suicide by now. The guy's really depressed. Or was, anyway. When you came into his life, it was like you reminded him what it was to live again. He needed someone to come in and smash the fortress he built around himself. So many people have tried. But you, he let you. He loves you. You should be so honored. Most guys would never do that. Besides, if you'd died in space, Squall would never be able to forgive himself for not saving you."

That makes me smile. Irvine's right. Squall needed me.

"Thanks, Irvy."

He grins, "No problem, babe. Just telling you what you already know."

"I just wish he would wake up."

"We all do. As quiet as he is, it's so much different without him. Garden is even different."

I giggle, "He's quite a man."

"You're pretty incredible yourself. Staying here for three straight days and nights. I couldn't do it."

"You could. If it was Selphie."

He shrugs, "Maybe."

I can see in his eyes how nervous he is, though. What will Garden do without Squall? I didn't even think about that.

He sits for a few more minutes, then gets up and heads for the door. "Let me know if you need something. I'm going to tell the others not to visit. I don't think he'd want them to see him like this."

"Thank you, I appreciate that."

********************************

I don't know how long it's been. It's almost like time is frozen. Just me and him.

Wait, I think I hear something. A groan. I'm not imagining it.

Is he waking up?

His head moves to the side slowly as he groans again. His hands are moving. And then…

His beautiful eyes open and look at me. He looks frightened at first, but then he relaxes. Tears pour down my face.

"Squall. You're awake! Thank goodness."

He looks away, around the room. Trying to figure out where he is.

"You're in the Infirmary, remember? You were shot."

He nods, remembering what happened. He looks back at me and takes my hand. I know he wants to say something, but he can't. The ventilator is blocking his voice. He makes a few attempts, all resulting in inaudible groans.

Frustrated, he bangs his fist on the bed. He winces at the pain.

I hug him. "It's okay now."

He looks back at me.

"How about we call the doctor and get this ventilator out, huh?"

His eyes light up and he nods.

*************************************************

Dr. Kadowaki comes in, a smile on her face.

"Welcome back."

He looks at her, still holding my hand.

She walks to his side and looks at him, "Let's get these tubes out of you, huh?"

He nods.

She puts her hands on the feeding tube and quickly pulls it out. He looks like he's in horrible pain. He grabs the bed with his free hand and squeezes mine tightly.

"Sorry, sweetie. Okay, I'm going to remove the ventilator. I'll count to three. When I say three, breathe out really hard, okay?"

He nods. I can see the fear and pain still present in his eyes.

She pulls the tube out, and Squall does as told. When the ventilator comes out, he starts coughing violently.

I guess she saw the look on my face, "It's alright, that's normal. Lots better, huh?"

Squall rolls his eyes.

"How about a nice painkiller?"

He tries to speak, but he can only whisper hoarsely. I can tell that frustrates him.

"It's okay. That will wear off in a day or so. You can talk as soon as the swelling goes down." She tells him as she injects him.

"I'll leave you two alone."

******************************************

"Squall. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it." I tell him.

He shakes his head, "Don't…Don't worry…about…it."

"Oh, sweetie. I'm so sorry you can't talk."

He smiles. A rare smile. "Not…much different…than usual."

That makes me laugh.

But it subsides quickly. "I was so scared, Squall. I thought I'd never tell you I was sorry."

"You…already did." He chokes

"You heard me? While you were asleep?"

"Every…every word."

I smile, "Good."

He tries to sit up, to kiss me. But he can't. It hurts him too badly.

"Don't sit up. They had to cut you open." I open the hospital gown and show him.

His eyes widen in disbelief, "W…Wow."

"Yeah." I reply, closing the gown again. "I'll come to you."

I lean down, but still let him initiate the kiss.

The kiss I missed so much…