Ok, hello every one, I would like you to do me a favor. I want you to
remember the last time you were seriously angry with some one or some
thing, got it, good. Now, take that memory and multiply the anger by a
thousand, then, add the undying urge to cry. Got it. Well, that is how I
feel, because my computer just crapped itself.
I wrote this chapter, and then my computer crapped up and I can't get to it. So I have to re write it. And that sucks, because the chapter I wrote was awesome.
Right. With that said, I have to warn you, that this is the last chapter of this fic. Which is rather sad. Any way, I hope you enjoy it, and please remember to review.
Review.
Oh yeah, and before I forget, now that this story is drawing to close I wish to inform you of my next story. As of yet, it has no title, but I am going to try my hand at an R rated fic. And the main character will be Percy!!!! (I am setting myself little challenges for my school holidays, and a Percy fic was one of them) I hope you would ready that one and review it when it is uploaded some time this week.
And Now that this is finished, I will get beck into writing Still Crazy. Don't worry, Draco and Gin will be out of there and back in love soon!!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
It had been a week since Lily had spoken to Remus about James. A whole week, and he was yet to say anything to her about his feelings. Lily had not expected a declaration of love from him immediately, she suspected that James would take a few days to work out what he was going to say to her and how he was going to say it, but she never expected him to take this long.
Maybe he was just planning something special, Maybe he just wanted every little thing to be perfect when he told her. Maybe he wanted to tell her at a special time, a time that Lily would never forget no matter how long she lived.
Maybe
Or Maybe he was lying about having feelings for her. Maybe he really didn't love her. Maybe she had got it all wrong. Maybe it was just a really big trick.
Maybe
Or Maybe Lily was just thinking too much about it all. .
Yeah, that was more than likely. In fact, she reasoned, she was crazy, she was Crazy for James. He was driving her crazy, maybe he didn't realize that he was doing it, but he was driving her crazy.
She was having trouble thinking about anything other than him now. Even her basic motor skills had gone out of the window. She was turning into a klutz. Her school work was dropping and her attention span was low.
And it was all James' fault. She knew that. Lily was to bust thinking about James and not busy enough with the things that actually mattered, like her school work.
Lily just wished that James would talk to her, to put her out of her misery. He had been avoiding the subject of their relationship for the week that had past. They had done homework together, and they had had three photography lessons in that time, but not one had James brought up his feelings.
Lily wondered if maybe she should make the first move. She didn't want to grow old and die waiting for him to tell her what he felt. Lily wished that she had the courage to just walk up to him and tell him that she felt the same way. She wished she had what it took to just walk up to James and kiss him.
But Lily was not that type of person. She didn't have the courage for that, she was not the type of person to just walk up to some one and embarrass herself. She just couldn't do it. She wished that she could, for her own sanities sake, but she couldn't.
Thoughts of James rushed through his mind at all times. During classes, during her own personal time, even while she was eating. This was what she was doing now, eating her lunch and thinking of James
She sighed, and pushed her food around with her fork.
"Oh, cheer up Lily, It is only Lima Bean Casserole, it could get worse" Sirius smiled as he sat beside her. She smiled at him and then at Remus who had sat down across from her.
Lily was glad that she was beginning to develop a strong friendship with Sirius and Remus. For some one who didn't have many friends and was not really accepted by others, she was glad that the boys wanted to be her friend. Once Lily had gotten to know them both, she realized that they were really nice people. Nice enough to pursue a friendship with them. Plus, it didn't hurt that they were friends with her maybe-maybe-not-boyfriend.
"Yes, Lima Beans, Food of the gods" Lily smiled as she pushed them around her plate again. She knew it would only take a little while for Remus to realize that she had been thinking about James again. Remus was a pretty perceptive guy (Lily wondered if it was because of the wolf in him, almost like an animal instinct.)
"Oh, it could get worse.....it could be my mothers cooking" Sirius smiled as he poked his own plate of Lima Beans.
"You are two hard on your mothers cooking, that Ravioli that she made that one time was really nice" Remus replied, reaching for food from the center of the table.
"Remus, that ravioli was from a can" Sirius replied. Lily laughed.
"Oh" Was all he could reply with.
The conversations went on between them for a few minutes, Sirius tried to look as though he was interest in what the other two were talking about (I mean, honestly, how can you talk about Ancient runes for long periods of time)
"Oh, Lily" Sirius said suddenly, breaking the conversation between Lily and Remus "I have a message for you from James"
"Really" She giggled like a lunatic. "I mean, oh, what did he say?"
"He said not to forget this and that it was really important..." Sirius began.
"Yeah, so what did he say?" Lily asked.
"Um? I forgot" Sirius replied honestly. Lily groaned and grabbed his forearm, digging her nails into his skin. Sirius winced in pain while Remus winced in sympathy.
"This is not funny Black. You know that for the last week I have been waiting for James to send me any little hint as to when he will come forward with his feelings. Now, you better remember his message quick smart before I remove your favorite appendage, rendering you unable to ever have children." Lily growled. Remus couldn't help but smile. "Another hand, five more fingernails" Remus lost his smile.
"umm, he said something about developing photos today and he wants to give you a lesson in the darkroom" Sirius mumbled. Lily smiled and released him. Sirius rubbed his arm where there were five nail marks.
"Thank you" She replied and then moved to the door of the great Hall.
"James is DEVELOPING photos and he wants to give lily a LESSON in the DARK room" Remus smirked. Sirius shook his head at his friend.
"And you keep saying I am the immature one" Sirius sighed.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The chemicals were set up, the used rolls of film were lined up, the room was ready to be darkened.
You know, for just in case they did end up getting around to developing pictures.
Today he was going to tell her how he really felt. He hoped. Seven days had passed since he had had his conversation with Remus and Sirius, The conversation resulting in Lily being told but not really told, of his feelings. And for the last seven days, he had been trying to tell her. Every day he had failed.
On Monday, she had come to visit him at quidditch training. His throat had closed up and he had choked. On Tuesday, he had studied with her in the library, with every intention of writing down his feelings and giving them to her, but his quill just didn't seem to scratch across the parchment. Wednesday, they had been just hanging out in the common room, he had tried to tell her, but he couldn't. He was too scared his palms started sweating and he couldn't find the words. Thursday, photography lesson, he had the opportunity, but he didn't take it.
Friday, no declaration. Saturday, no hope of a declaration. Sunday, No hope in the world of a declaration.
Why? Cos he was a coward.
He was scared that he was going to make a fool of himself. He was scared that she would not feel the same way about him that he felt about her, he was scared that some thing would go wrong when he told her. He was scared, because he wanted everything to be perfect.
So that was why he had come up with his idea for the day. He had given Sirius the message to pass on to Lily. (He just hoped that Sirius would not screw that up). And now he was waiting for her to come to his room.
He had a plan which he thought was flawless. He was sitting on his bed in the darkened room, waiting for her to arrive. As soon as he heard the door open, he was planning on pulling her into his arms, whispering a little declaration of love to her, and then ending it in a kiss, all in the solitude of the darkness.
James was confident in the dark.
He wiped his sweating hands on the bed spread and waited for her to arrive. After 20 minutes, she still wasn't there. James made a mental note to kill Sirius, regenerate him and then kill him again, hell, he noted, just to regenerate him and kill him till he got board.
The door opened, and some one entered. James stood, wiped his hands on his pants, and then made a grab for the person in the dark. James wrapped his arms around the other person in the room.
"I think I love you" James whispered.
"I am sorry James, you are not my type" came the very masculine reply.
James jumped away from the other person in the room and grabbed his wand. The room was suddenly alight.
"Peter?" James questioned.
"I hope to god that you are up her waiting for Lily" He smiled and then moved to his bed, picking up a book. "Sorry to interrupt and everything"
"That is ok...I am sorry" James replied.
"Good luck with the whole Lily thing" Peter smiled as he moved back to the door.
"Thanks Man...oh and Peter?" James began nervously.
"Oh, Believe me James, my lips are sealed" Peter laughed as he left the room.
James sighed. Ok, maybe his flawless plan had a few flaws.
Deciding it would be safer to keep the lights on this time, James collapsed back onto the bed.
He could do this. He could do this, all he had to do was say, Lily, I love you and I want to be with you. He could do this....
There was a knock at the door and Lily's voice calling his name.
He couldn't do this!!! He couldn't just say, Lily, I love you and I want to be with you. That would never work. It was lame, it was unthought-of of, it was.....
James opened the door.
Well, it would have to do.
"Hi James" Lily smiled nervously as she entered the room. James smiled at her.
"Hey Lily, I was wondering if you got my message, maybe it wasn't the best idea to send it with Sirius" He admitted. Lily laughed and jammed her hands into her pockets.
They stood in silence for a few seconds. Neither of them knowing what to say. Lily took the opportunity to look around the room quickly. She saw the developing things in the corner and her heart sank. She didn't really think that she would be developing anything other than a relationship with James.
"So.... Developing huh?" She asked. James looked across the room.
"Yeah, developing, I was going to show you where to start with it all" He told her. She nodded and they moved to the developing things together.
James had lost his nerve, again. He knew that as soon as they started to talk about developing techniques in stead of kissing techniques that he had no chance of steering the conversation back to their non existent love life.
Lily felt like crying, this was getting beyond a joke. She didn't care about chemicals and photos, she cared about James. But she made it look like she was listening intently as he explained to her what to do.
Soon James turned off the lights and began to developing process. After a while, Lily could not take it any more. She moved through the darkness to one of the beds and sat, finally letting a tear roll down her cheek. Luckily it was dark, and he was so caught up in what he was doing.
Lily wished she was braver. She wished she could just walk up to him and kiss him .... wait, why couldn't she.
Lily stood, and laughed lightly at herself. She already knew that he liked her, she had just been stubborn about making him make the first move. And now, in the darkness of the darkroom, she had found her courage.
James jumped slightly as he felt her arms rap around his hips from behind and her lips come to rest on the skin of the back of his neck. James turned so that he help Lily to him.
"A girl could die waiting for you Potter" She smiled. James laughed and lowered his lips to hers for a soft kiss.
"I am an idiot for waiting for so long" He told her.
"I will second that motion" She whispered, her lips still gliding over his. "But I guess I could have done something to"
"That is true also" He mumbled, kissing her.
"Thank god for the courage a darkroom gives" She smiled.
They kissed for a few minutes before James finally pulled away.
"Lils, have I told you yet how much I love you?"
"No, but I have been waiting for you to say it" She smiled, pulling his lips back to hers.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I wrote this chapter, and then my computer crapped up and I can't get to it. So I have to re write it. And that sucks, because the chapter I wrote was awesome.
Right. With that said, I have to warn you, that this is the last chapter of this fic. Which is rather sad. Any way, I hope you enjoy it, and please remember to review.
Review.
Oh yeah, and before I forget, now that this story is drawing to close I wish to inform you of my next story. As of yet, it has no title, but I am going to try my hand at an R rated fic. And the main character will be Percy!!!! (I am setting myself little challenges for my school holidays, and a Percy fic was one of them) I hope you would ready that one and review it when it is uploaded some time this week.
And Now that this is finished, I will get beck into writing Still Crazy. Don't worry, Draco and Gin will be out of there and back in love soon!!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
It had been a week since Lily had spoken to Remus about James. A whole week, and he was yet to say anything to her about his feelings. Lily had not expected a declaration of love from him immediately, she suspected that James would take a few days to work out what he was going to say to her and how he was going to say it, but she never expected him to take this long.
Maybe he was just planning something special, Maybe he just wanted every little thing to be perfect when he told her. Maybe he wanted to tell her at a special time, a time that Lily would never forget no matter how long she lived.
Maybe
Or Maybe he was lying about having feelings for her. Maybe he really didn't love her. Maybe she had got it all wrong. Maybe it was just a really big trick.
Maybe
Or Maybe Lily was just thinking too much about it all. .
Yeah, that was more than likely. In fact, she reasoned, she was crazy, she was Crazy for James. He was driving her crazy, maybe he didn't realize that he was doing it, but he was driving her crazy.
She was having trouble thinking about anything other than him now. Even her basic motor skills had gone out of the window. She was turning into a klutz. Her school work was dropping and her attention span was low.
And it was all James' fault. She knew that. Lily was to bust thinking about James and not busy enough with the things that actually mattered, like her school work.
Lily just wished that James would talk to her, to put her out of her misery. He had been avoiding the subject of their relationship for the week that had past. They had done homework together, and they had had three photography lessons in that time, but not one had James brought up his feelings.
Lily wondered if maybe she should make the first move. She didn't want to grow old and die waiting for him to tell her what he felt. Lily wished that she had the courage to just walk up to him and tell him that she felt the same way. She wished she had what it took to just walk up to James and kiss him.
But Lily was not that type of person. She didn't have the courage for that, she was not the type of person to just walk up to some one and embarrass herself. She just couldn't do it. She wished that she could, for her own sanities sake, but she couldn't.
Thoughts of James rushed through his mind at all times. During classes, during her own personal time, even while she was eating. This was what she was doing now, eating her lunch and thinking of James
She sighed, and pushed her food around with her fork.
"Oh, cheer up Lily, It is only Lima Bean Casserole, it could get worse" Sirius smiled as he sat beside her. She smiled at him and then at Remus who had sat down across from her.
Lily was glad that she was beginning to develop a strong friendship with Sirius and Remus. For some one who didn't have many friends and was not really accepted by others, she was glad that the boys wanted to be her friend. Once Lily had gotten to know them both, she realized that they were really nice people. Nice enough to pursue a friendship with them. Plus, it didn't hurt that they were friends with her maybe-maybe-not-boyfriend.
"Yes, Lima Beans, Food of the gods" Lily smiled as she pushed them around her plate again. She knew it would only take a little while for Remus to realize that she had been thinking about James again. Remus was a pretty perceptive guy (Lily wondered if it was because of the wolf in him, almost like an animal instinct.)
"Oh, it could get worse.....it could be my mothers cooking" Sirius smiled as he poked his own plate of Lima Beans.
"You are two hard on your mothers cooking, that Ravioli that she made that one time was really nice" Remus replied, reaching for food from the center of the table.
"Remus, that ravioli was from a can" Sirius replied. Lily laughed.
"Oh" Was all he could reply with.
The conversations went on between them for a few minutes, Sirius tried to look as though he was interest in what the other two were talking about (I mean, honestly, how can you talk about Ancient runes for long periods of time)
"Oh, Lily" Sirius said suddenly, breaking the conversation between Lily and Remus "I have a message for you from James"
"Really" She giggled like a lunatic. "I mean, oh, what did he say?"
"He said not to forget this and that it was really important..." Sirius began.
"Yeah, so what did he say?" Lily asked.
"Um? I forgot" Sirius replied honestly. Lily groaned and grabbed his forearm, digging her nails into his skin. Sirius winced in pain while Remus winced in sympathy.
"This is not funny Black. You know that for the last week I have been waiting for James to send me any little hint as to when he will come forward with his feelings. Now, you better remember his message quick smart before I remove your favorite appendage, rendering you unable to ever have children." Lily growled. Remus couldn't help but smile. "Another hand, five more fingernails" Remus lost his smile.
"umm, he said something about developing photos today and he wants to give you a lesson in the darkroom" Sirius mumbled. Lily smiled and released him. Sirius rubbed his arm where there were five nail marks.
"Thank you" She replied and then moved to the door of the great Hall.
"James is DEVELOPING photos and he wants to give lily a LESSON in the DARK room" Remus smirked. Sirius shook his head at his friend.
"And you keep saying I am the immature one" Sirius sighed.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The chemicals were set up, the used rolls of film were lined up, the room was ready to be darkened.
You know, for just in case they did end up getting around to developing pictures.
Today he was going to tell her how he really felt. He hoped. Seven days had passed since he had had his conversation with Remus and Sirius, The conversation resulting in Lily being told but not really told, of his feelings. And for the last seven days, he had been trying to tell her. Every day he had failed.
On Monday, she had come to visit him at quidditch training. His throat had closed up and he had choked. On Tuesday, he had studied with her in the library, with every intention of writing down his feelings and giving them to her, but his quill just didn't seem to scratch across the parchment. Wednesday, they had been just hanging out in the common room, he had tried to tell her, but he couldn't. He was too scared his palms started sweating and he couldn't find the words. Thursday, photography lesson, he had the opportunity, but he didn't take it.
Friday, no declaration. Saturday, no hope of a declaration. Sunday, No hope in the world of a declaration.
Why? Cos he was a coward.
He was scared that he was going to make a fool of himself. He was scared that she would not feel the same way about him that he felt about her, he was scared that some thing would go wrong when he told her. He was scared, because he wanted everything to be perfect.
So that was why he had come up with his idea for the day. He had given Sirius the message to pass on to Lily. (He just hoped that Sirius would not screw that up). And now he was waiting for her to come to his room.
He had a plan which he thought was flawless. He was sitting on his bed in the darkened room, waiting for her to arrive. As soon as he heard the door open, he was planning on pulling her into his arms, whispering a little declaration of love to her, and then ending it in a kiss, all in the solitude of the darkness.
James was confident in the dark.
He wiped his sweating hands on the bed spread and waited for her to arrive. After 20 minutes, she still wasn't there. James made a mental note to kill Sirius, regenerate him and then kill him again, hell, he noted, just to regenerate him and kill him till he got board.
The door opened, and some one entered. James stood, wiped his hands on his pants, and then made a grab for the person in the dark. James wrapped his arms around the other person in the room.
"I think I love you" James whispered.
"I am sorry James, you are not my type" came the very masculine reply.
James jumped away from the other person in the room and grabbed his wand. The room was suddenly alight.
"Peter?" James questioned.
"I hope to god that you are up her waiting for Lily" He smiled and then moved to his bed, picking up a book. "Sorry to interrupt and everything"
"That is ok...I am sorry" James replied.
"Good luck with the whole Lily thing" Peter smiled as he moved back to the door.
"Thanks Man...oh and Peter?" James began nervously.
"Oh, Believe me James, my lips are sealed" Peter laughed as he left the room.
James sighed. Ok, maybe his flawless plan had a few flaws.
Deciding it would be safer to keep the lights on this time, James collapsed back onto the bed.
He could do this. He could do this, all he had to do was say, Lily, I love you and I want to be with you. He could do this....
There was a knock at the door and Lily's voice calling his name.
He couldn't do this!!! He couldn't just say, Lily, I love you and I want to be with you. That would never work. It was lame, it was unthought-of of, it was.....
James opened the door.
Well, it would have to do.
"Hi James" Lily smiled nervously as she entered the room. James smiled at her.
"Hey Lily, I was wondering if you got my message, maybe it wasn't the best idea to send it with Sirius" He admitted. Lily laughed and jammed her hands into her pockets.
They stood in silence for a few seconds. Neither of them knowing what to say. Lily took the opportunity to look around the room quickly. She saw the developing things in the corner and her heart sank. She didn't really think that she would be developing anything other than a relationship with James.
"So.... Developing huh?" She asked. James looked across the room.
"Yeah, developing, I was going to show you where to start with it all" He told her. She nodded and they moved to the developing things together.
James had lost his nerve, again. He knew that as soon as they started to talk about developing techniques in stead of kissing techniques that he had no chance of steering the conversation back to their non existent love life.
Lily felt like crying, this was getting beyond a joke. She didn't care about chemicals and photos, she cared about James. But she made it look like she was listening intently as he explained to her what to do.
Soon James turned off the lights and began to developing process. After a while, Lily could not take it any more. She moved through the darkness to one of the beds and sat, finally letting a tear roll down her cheek. Luckily it was dark, and he was so caught up in what he was doing.
Lily wished she was braver. She wished she could just walk up to him and kiss him .... wait, why couldn't she.
Lily stood, and laughed lightly at herself. She already knew that he liked her, she had just been stubborn about making him make the first move. And now, in the darkness of the darkroom, she had found her courage.
James jumped slightly as he felt her arms rap around his hips from behind and her lips come to rest on the skin of the back of his neck. James turned so that he help Lily to him.
"A girl could die waiting for you Potter" She smiled. James laughed and lowered his lips to hers for a soft kiss.
"I am an idiot for waiting for so long" He told her.
"I will second that motion" She whispered, her lips still gliding over his. "But I guess I could have done something to"
"That is true also" He mumbled, kissing her.
"Thank god for the courage a darkroom gives" She smiled.
They kissed for a few minutes before James finally pulled away.
"Lils, have I told you yet how much I love you?"
"No, but I have been waiting for you to say it" She smiled, pulling his lips back to hers.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*