DISCLAIMER: I am not JK Rowling and the world of Harry Potter does not
belong to me. I wish it did, but it doesn't. I am making no money off this
trifle of a story.
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"And where were the two of you this morning?" Harry teased Ron and Hermione as they walked into Herbology. They glanced at each other, wide and secret smiles spreading across both faces.
"Actually," said Ron, still looking at Hermione, "we skipped breakfast and stayed in the common room. I told Hermione that I had something to talk to her about."
"I see," Harry replied, sitting down next to Ron. "And what did you need to talk about?"
"Well first we talked about you," answered Hermione. "But then Ron took your advice and told me he liked me."
"I can't believe you were working us both," Ron added. "You knew she liked me and she never told me."
"That isn't completely true," Harry argued back. "I did tell you that Hermione liked you. I just didn't tell you that I knew because we talked about it. She's my friend. I had to keep her secret. Would you have wanted me telling Hermione that you liked her?"
"I suppose not," Ron replied, finally tearing his eyes away from Hermione and just long enough to look at Harry. "But thanks for pushing me into telling her. Unfortunately, you were right again."
"Of course I was. So does that mean you're together?" Harry asked and they responded by holding up their hands to show Harry their interlocked fingers. Grinning, Harry said, "Should I take that as a yes?"
Hermione nodded. "Yes, you should. Thank you, Harry, for encouraging him. You were right when you said I was scared to tell him."
"I know I was," responded Harry, looking around for Professor Sprout.
"There's just one thing," Ron said at length, looking at Harry with a nervous expression painted across his face. "No matter what happens, you'll always be my best friend and Hermione's friend as well, but now that Hermione and I are together, we'll be wanting to spend a lot more time together. Alone."
Harry tried not to look too happy at the thought of having more time alone to analyze his thoughts on Draco and pondering his recently discovered crush. Not only that, but alone time meant Draco watching. "I understand," he told them. "Don't worry about it."
"Well," Hermione said, "Ron and I were hoping that we could have some time to ourselves when we go to Hogsmeade. If that's okay with you."
"I told you not to worry about it," Harry instructed. "Take all the alone time together that you need. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine."
Professor Sprout walked into the greenhouse just then and began instructing the class on today's lesson of planting dingabumbs. Harry's mind, however, wasn't on Herbology, much less dingabumbs. Lately, it seemed, Harry wasn't able to focus on anything he was expected to. It was starting to annoy him. All of his thoughts would lead back to Draco Malfoy and this morning held no exception. Last night Draco hadn't come to dinner and this morning, Harry was so preoccupied with Ron and Hermione's absence that he wasn't sure if Malfoy showed up there, either.
At least the trip to Hogsmeade would give Harry some time for watching Draco. It seemed that Malfoy took every free chance he got to get out of Hogwarts and Harry was certain, without a doubt, that Draco would be there. Harry would use his independence from Ron and Hermione as an opportunity because with them so involved in each other, it would leave little room for them to be focused on Harry. The less focus concentrated on him, the lesser the chance that they would find out about his Draco infatuation.
He was partnered with Hannah Abbot and Harry was constantly finding himself apologizing for spacing out on her as they planted the dingabumbs at the same tray. Across the room, Harry could see Ron and Hermione working together, talking in low whispers and giggling. The lesson dragged on as Harry continued to make a disaster out of the Herbology assignment. Hannah was becoming increasingly irritated with him and Harry felt guilty for dazing so much. He really didn't know how to stop it because he so obviously tried. His mind still wandered back to Draco or Ron and Hermione and try as he may, it was to no avail.
Class ended and they all went back to Transfiguration. Harry was fairly sure that he fell asleep that class period but it didn't matter because the entire thing was a lecture, though Harry wasn't quite sure on what. They headed for the Gryffindor dormitory afterwards and stayed there until the time for lunch approached. As the time drew closer, pounding feet could be heard and everyone in the common room looked up to see Seamus Finnigan running through the portrait hole, leaning over, and huffing for air.
"Has anyone heard about Draco Malfoy?" Seamus panted and the room answered with a collective no.
At Seamus's words, Harry could immediately feel himself going sick, his stomach lurching around in jerky spasms. Nothing but concern and worry filled his sense and all his peripheral vision seemed to be lost. The only person in the room other than Harry himself was Seamus, the carrier of news of Draco. Harry knew Draco hadn't been at dinner or breakfast and now he knew it was because something was wrong.
"What's up with Malfoy," Ron asked, shattering Harry's illusion and he was suddenly aware of everyone in the room. He exchanged glances with both Ron and Hermione.
"Is he badly hurt from yesterday?" Hermione added.
"No," answered Seamus. "Its nothing like that. Since he left Care for Magical Creatures early yesterday, Malfoy has been holed up in the Slytherin common room. He went to see Madam Pomfrey for his arm first. Ever since, he won't leave the Slytherin dormitory or common room. Dumbledore is being sent down there right now to coax him out."
"What's wrong with him?" Harry asked, ignoring most of the laughter and snickers in the room from people who were less than fond of Malfoy.
"Nothing's actually wrong," Seamus answered, and this seemed to amuse the Gryffindors even more. "Even Snape seems pretty mad from all the commotion Malfoy's causing. Keeps telling the Slytherins to tell the professors that he's not coming out. I was walking to lunch when I heard Pansy Parkinson tell the Slytherin girls that Malfoy told McGonagall he isn't ever coming out again. He told her that if she wants him out, she's going to have to come in there and magic him out. If Dumbledore can't convince him to come out, they're going to have to call Malfoy's father. I mean, honestly, nothing is wrong with him. He just won't come out." More sniggers could be heard from the Gryffindors at this.
"People don't just not come out of their rooms for no reason," Harry muttered to himself. Ron and Hermione were quiet compared to the rest of the room and both seemed to be thinking what Harry had just said.
People don't just barricade themselves in their rooms and refuse to come out for no reason. Harry had a sinking feeling that whatever the reason was, it was due in a large part to whatever Draco claimed to be "too much to deal with" on the first night Harry saw him. Now Draco, though physically well, had seemed to mentally shut down and was refusing to come out. More than anything, Harry wanted to go down to the dungeons and try to get Malfoy to come out. The only problem was, Malfoy still hated Harry.
"Where are you going?" Harry heard Ron ask and he looked up to see Fred and George heading for the portrait hole.
"I want to see this," replied Fred, laughing.
"It isn't every day that a student refuses to leave his common room and Dumbledore has to be summoned," George added. "And it isn't just any student. This is Draco Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy's son that we're talking about. I'd take pictures if I could."
"Good idea," he heard Fred call back.
"Fred and George!" Hermione called, stunned. "It isn't nice to go down there and stare. If Malfoy isn't coming out, he's doing this for a reason. No one just refuses to leave their common room without a reason, even if it turns out to be a bad one."
"Well then stay here," Fred told her. "No one is making you go."
"I'm coming," Ron said, standing up and following. "After everything Malfoy's done and all the times he's made fun of us, I need to see this with my own eyes. I can't believe you're still defending Malfoy after all he's done to you, me, and Harry. Are you going to just ignore the fact that his father is a Death Eater?"
"No," she answered, joining Ron by his side, "but just because Lucius is in a league with Voldemort, it doesn't mean that Draco is."
Ron laughed. "I wouldn't count on that. But even if he wasn't, he's still got time to become one. The Malfoy family is and it's only a matter of time before Malfoy joins, too," Ron pointed out. "He's expected to, Hermione. Malfoy doesn't really have a choice, not that he seems to want one. Harry? You coming?"
"If everyone else is going, I guess I will too," Harry answered, trying to hide his excitement. Not only was he going down to see Malfoy with other people so it wouldn't look suspicious, but some things were starting to make sense. Of course Draco's father was a Death Eater and of course Draco was expected to follow where Lucius led. Draco really didn't have a choice and that probably made his life a lot harder to deal with. Maybe even too much to deal with. That part was finally so clear. So obvious. Why hadn't he seen it before? Then again, there seemed to be a lot of things concerning Draco that Harry never noticed before.
'I was probably too clouded by my crush on Malfoy,' Harry thought, bitterly.
"I'm really not too terribly surprised about this," said Hermione as they headed for the dungeons. "Malfoy has been acting rather strange lately. Remember in Potions when his cauldron bubbled over and then we saw him after class. He looked so melancholy. And Malfoy always does well in Potions. Then yesterday when the oberdun attacked him, Malfoy didn't even put on a big show about it. He just let it go."
"I told you I thought that was strange," said Ron. "He usually makes a big fuss, swears that his father is going to hear about it, and then tries to get Hagrid fired. You don't think that's what his intentions are now, do you? Maybe he's taken a different approach and is trying to make it seem that he was traumatized by the oberdun incident."
"I don't think that's it," Harry finally spoke up. "Malfoy was acting strange before that class yesterday."
Up ahead, there was a small crowd cluttering up the hallway in front of the Slytherin common room. Professor Snape was standing right by the entrance, the most petulant expression Harry had ever seen him wear spread across his face. It was an expression that Snape usually reserved for Harry. Seamus had been right about Snape and Malfoy was Snape's favorite student. The first person to spot their approach was Professor McGonagall, who left the entrance and walked over to them.
"I suggest you five turn around head right back to the common room," she said. "Classes for this afternoon have been canceled and there's nothing here for any of you to see. Mr. Malfoy isn't going to come out any sooner if he knows that students are waiting to tease him when he emerges."
"Is Dumbledore in there with him now?" asked Harry.
"Yes he is, Mr. Potter. Now I'll kindly ask you to go back to your common room before I have to deduct points from Gryffindor. Mr. Malfoy does not need a fan club waiting out here for him," she answered.
Fred and George turned around, disappointed, and left to go back to Gryffindor tower. "You coming, Harry?" Ron asked.
"Go ahead," Harry answered. "I'll be along in a minute. I want to have a quick word with Professor McGonagall." Ron and Hermione nodded, locking fingers and heading off for Gryffindor tower. Harry watched them go before turning back. "Professor McGonagall," called Harry and he caught Snape's irritated eye.
"What did I tell you, Mr. Potter?" said Professor McGonagall, coming over to him.
"I know, Professor," Harry responded, "but I wanted to have a quick word with you alone."
Her expression softened and she laid a hand on his shoulder, guiding him away. "Alright, Mr. Potter. What is it that you wanted to talk to me about?"
"Malfoy," responded Harry. "This is all going to remain privately between the two of us, right? Because it's kind of personal and if its not going to stay private, then I don't want to talk about it."
"I assure you, everything you say will be in the strictest of confidentiality," she assured as they walked down the halls.
"Well, I guess you can't tell me what's wrong with Malfoy," started Harry, "but I'm worried. I know that there's this big feud between Malfoy and me, but lately I haven't been hating him. I'm starting to see that there's more to Malfoy than what he leads on."
"You're growing up, Harry," Professor McGonagall replied. "I couldn't be more proud of you. Its very mature of you to be able to look past a school boy feud, especially when the person in question insults you and your best friends."
"But that's all Malfoy really knows," pointed out Harry. "All he's ever grown up hearing. Its not secret that Lucius Malfoy hates Muggles and anything that has to do with them, including mudbloods and half-bloods. Of course that would be imprinted in his son's mind."
"Dumbledore is going to be happy to hear this," she said.
"You said you wouldn't tell," Harry accused.
"I'm not," she replied. "You are. I imagine it will only be a matter of time for you before you tell Professor Dumbledore. I'm just giving you a nudge in the right direction."
Harry sighed, nodding. "Alright, but I don't want anyone else to know. Especially not Hermione or Ron. Malfoy is so awful to them and I don't want them to think I'm feeling that way. At least not yet."
"I swore to you that it would stay in confidentiality and it shall," Professor McGonagall told him. "Now run along to the common room. I'll let Professor Dumbledore know that you want to talk to him and maybe he'll stop by Gryffindor if he can make any progress with Mr. Malfoy."
Harry nodded, turning around and walking to the common room. He was relieved to have gotten some of his feelings about Draco out in the open but there was still so much that Harry didn't dare tell her. Like the crush he had inadvertently developed on Malfoy or the fact that Harry had been following him around Hogwarts ground. Now McGonagall knew and the next step was telling Dumbledore what he could about his change of heart. Relief from being able to let some of his bottled up emotion out swept in great tides over Harry's body.
At the same time, a voice panicked inside his head. Now that someone knew, all he had was her word that she wouldn't tell anyone the way Harry was feeling. If there was anyone Harry could trust with this, it would be McGonagall and Dumbledore, but that didn't ease his mind. Harry's worst fear was that McGonagall would tell the teachers and before long, everyone, including Malfoy himself, would know. The thought alone made Harry feel sick to his stomach. Draco, clearly, still hated Harry just as much if not more than last year, the year before, and the year before that, going al the way back to their first year at Hogwarts.
Harry muttered the password and Harry was admitted into the common room. It was alive with gossip and chatter as Harry wandered over by the fire where Ron and Hermione were sitting. He dropped into an armchair, wishing that it weren't only the afternoon because Harry wanted to escape to the dormitory. Unfortunately, for Harry to disappear upstairs, it would look suspicious and he had already stayed behind to talk to Professor McGongall. He couldn't go anywhere either just in case Dumbledore made progress with Malfoy or just came to talk to Harry.
The hours before dinner passed, filled with idle chatter over classes, Quidditch, and Brewner, the new female Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Draco Malfoy and his escapade in the Slytherin common room, however, was the hot topic of discussion in the Gryffindor common room and Harry could have kissed Hermione in gratitude when she insisted that they back off. He, instead, decided that he'd leave the kissing of Hermione to Ron. Dumbledore hadn't shown up by the time for dinner approached and Harry silently followed his friends down to the Great Hall.
Upon entering, Harry's eyes immediately went to the Slytherin table and Harry's breath caught in his throat when familiar white blond hair and silver eyes came into view. A frown was set on his pale, pointed face and from where Harry stood in the entrance, he could hear students from all four houses teasing Malfoy over the charade. After a quick inventory, Harry was pleased to see that Malfoy's arm was indeed fine though he didn't look happy at all. Instead of fighting back, a usual Malfoy response, Draco just let he insults fly at him as his head hung.
Ignoring the words coming from his fellow Gryffindors, Harry walked over to the Gryffindor table and began eating. He made sure to sit facing the Slytherin table, keeping his eyes on Draco as the table began to fill up with students and conversations started. He could hear Ron and Hermione talking about Draco's strange behavior but he opted for staying out of the conversation. Nothing he could say would make a difference anyway. Across from the Great Hall, Harry saw Draco lift his head and their eyes locked. Draco seemed to be waiting for something, perhaps for a sign of victory or smugness from Harry over seeing Draco fall apart right before his eyes. Draco's eyes and face never hardened but instead remained dead, expecting and waiting for Harry the acknowledge the triumph. Harry's expression softened and he offered Draco a small smile of reassurance, careful not to look pleased or smug.
He expected Draco to get mad at the gesture or even let it roll of his back without protest like he did for everything else that was being thrown his way. The last thing Harry expected to see was the small smile that crept across Draco's face in reply before his eyes fell away from Harry and back to his plate. Thinking it over, Harry thought that might have been the first real and genuine smile he had ever seen on Draco Malfoy's pointed face. One that didn't come from the amusement at the expense of another. The change of pace was somewhat refreshing.
From behind him, Harry could hear a throat being cleared and he turned around to see Professor Dumbledore standing there, looking down at him. "Mr. Potter," he said, "I see you've finished here. Would you care to take a walk with me."
Harry, knowing what Dumbledore was getting at, looked from Ron to Hermione to McGonagall before he turned back to Dumbledore and nodded. He caught Draco's inquisitive eyes before standing and following Dumbledore out of the Great Hall and the school. "I understand that you wanted to talk to me about something," Dumbledore jumped in, avoiding the usual niceties.
"Professor McGonagall didn't tell you what?" asked Harry.
"No," answered Professor Dumbledore, "she told me that it was a private matter between the two of you and that you wanted to be the one to tell me."
"Yes," Harry answered, looking around to make sure no one but himself and Dumbledore was listening, immediately followed by Harry thinking that he wouldn't have done that had be not been spying on Draco so much. "Its about Malfoy."
"Mr. Malfoy? He's been through a lot today, and given your history, I'm not surprised you have Mr. Malfoy on your mind. What is it about now?"
"Well," Harry started before his voice trailed off, "it seems that lately Malfoy has been unhappy and he isn't acting how he usually does. His behavior is out of character and then today, he refused to come out of the Slytherin common room. I've actually been concerned. Professor McGonagall says I'm growing up and that she's proud of my maturity. I'm just worried about Malfoy and it isn't like I can say anything to him because we have the feud."
When Harry turned to look at Dumbledore, he also seemed to be beaming with pride. It takes a big man to love his enemy and see that there is more to a person than what he shows. You've done that here with Mr. Malfoy and I am proud of you as well."
"Please don't mention this to anyone," Harry pleaded. "I don't want anyone to know, especially Ron, Hermione, and Malfoy. They just wouldn't understand."
"I think Mr. Malfoy just may surprise you but if you insist, your secret is safe with me."
"I suppose you couldn't tell me why Malfoy refused to come out of the common room," Harry said.
"Only Mr. Malfoy knows that, my dear boy. He wouldn't disclose that information to anyone nor do I think he ever will. Perhaps he was just looking for some time alone and it exploded into the whole school knowing Mr. Malfoy did not want to leave the common room."
"But could you tell me how you got him to come out?" asked Harry.
"Between you and me, Mr. Malfoy just needed some time for himself and so it didn't take much to get him out. I think it became a matter of principle once we were trying to get him to come out. All I really had to do was suggest sending for Lucius and Draco came right out. He, however, requested that the teachers not meddle in the teasing Draco expected. Wanted to handle it himself."
Harry nodded, understanding why Draco wouldn't want his professors fighting his battles for him, especially after the commotion that came from Draco hiding out in his common room. They walked back to Hogwarts and parted ways inside the school. Harry hurried to the common room, not caring about having to make conversation and be sociable before bed. The next day marked a visit to Hogsmeade with Ron and Hermione off on their own. That left Harry with plenty of time for watching Draco and he had smiled at dinner. Hopes for Harry were high and Harry wasn't going to allow anything to destroy them.
Harry was in high spirits for the rest of the night and got in bed early awaiting the trip to Hogsmeade. Though finding difficulty in falling asleep, Harry finally found himself drifting off to a dreamland. Off in a deep sleep, Harry had a rather pleasant dream involving Draco, though Harry couldn't exactly put his finger on what happened in it. Dressing without delay, he and Ron rushed down to the common room and, joining Hermione, set off for breakfast.
All during breakfast, Harry kept his eyes focused on Draco's bent figure. His happy mood vanished upon seeing Draco, his skin paler than usual and thin lines drawn at the corners of his eyes. Picking more at his food than actually eating, Draco didn't look up once during breakfast to catch Harry's eye nor to join in any conversation at the Slytherin table. He just stared at his plate, picking at his food, and remained silent with his lips drawn into a taut, pencil thin line.
Breakfast passed fairly quickly, over before Harry even realized people were leaving, and he stood up to join the other students going to Hogsmeade. Fortunately for Harry, Draco was among them. He had been fearing taking the trip to Hogsmeade and discovering that Draco stayed behind or something equally as bad.
Harry kept out of most conversation on the way to Hogsmeade and detached from Ron and Hermione immediately upon arrival. He strolled up and down the streets, trying to look like he wasn't just waiting for the right time to start following Draco. Once he was sure they had been there long enough, Harry began keeping his eyes focused on looking for Draco. Scanning the crowd, Harry wasn't paying much attention to where he was walking when he smacked into a body and went tumbling backward.
Looking up through his strands of black hair that had fallen into his eyes, Harry saw Cho Chang offering her hand to help him up. "Are you okay?" she asked.
"Yeah," Harry answered, ignoring Cho and searching for Draco again. "Sorry about that." Without another word, Harry's eyes landed on Draco and he walked away, heading in Malfoy's general direction.
Harry weaved through people until he was close to Malfoy bust still a safe distance away. Waiting until he wasn't flanked by Crabbe and Goyle, Harry followed Draco in whatever direction he took. Disappearing into Honeydukes, Draco stayed outside while his friends were loading up on sweets. Taking this as his chance, Harry strolled across the street to where Draco was standing.
"Hey, Malfoy," Harry said, standing in front of Draco.
"What do you want, Potter?" Draco spit back at him.
Draco's venom caught Harry off guard after yesterday's smile and he stood there, dumbfounded, and reaching for words. "I was just," Harry stammered. "I mean. Yesterday."
"I don't need your pity, Potter," Draco drawled. "I may have smiled but that does not mean that we are friends. Just because you weren't harassing me over my episode or talking about my episode, it doesn't mean that I'm going to be nice to you or your mudblood and muggle loving friends. Speaking of which, I heard they're an item now. How absolutely perfect. The Weasleys are a disgrace to wizarding families, associating with mudbloods like that."
"Shove it, Malfoy," Harry retorted before he could stop himself and the pleased smirk came across Draco's face that he wore so often. Harry thought he liked it better when it was real. Draco was beautiful no matter what, but he real smile made him look even more so. "Look, I didn't come over here to fight with you, Malfoy. Yesterday, for a minute, I actually thought there was some good in you. I must have been mistaken."
"You were," Draco bit back and he turned around just as both Crabbe and Goyle were coming back onto the street. Harry noticed once again that the venom never reached Draco's eyes.
Harry spent the remainder of his time walking up and down the roads and thinking of Draco. His words didn't matter because eyes and tone of voice reveal everything. Draco's words were harsh but his eyes were begging for a release. One thing Harry noticed was that Draco admitted to the smile, more than Harry expected him to do, and that painted hope back into Harry's world.
With Ron and Hermione, they headed back to Hogwarts and Harry kept himself from thinking about Draco by teasing Ron and Hermione. The playful jesting lightened Harry's mood and he was happy to be talking to his friends again after a long day. He wouldn't let Draco's words discourage him. That smile, tone of voice, and those eyes betrayed him, did him in, and there was no way those words could mean anything now. Actions speak louder than words and Draco's were screaming for mercy.
Harry went to bed that night just as happy if not happier than he had the night before. Draco, as always, weighed heavy on his mind and Harry kept replaying that smile over and over again in his head. Today's events may not have advanced things, but Harry wouldn't call them a step in the wrong direction, either. All together, Harry felt that they broke even in the end with all things concerned. Even if Draco was in denial over the estranged but hopefully forming friendship, Harry wasn't going to let himself be talked out of trying.
The next few days passed with a few Draco sightings and Harry was ready to scream out of frustration. The longer Harry watched him, the more hopeless and empty that Draco seemed to become. He found himself falling harder for Draco every single day. Each time Harry saw him, Draco looked a little more beautiful than the last and Harry was about ready to just run up and kiss him without being scared of the consequences. Those lips were so tempting and if Harry could, he'd kiss away the pain Draco was feeling. If only Draco would let him.
Gryffindor won the Quidditch game against Hufflepuff and Angelina congratulated Harry on an excellent catch of the Snitch. Ron was ecstatic to be part of a winning Quidditch team and he and Harry stayed up late with Hermione celebrating the first Gryffindor win that Ron was a part of. After the game, as Harry had been walking off the field and Ron was up ahead, hugging Hermione and giving her kisses, he looked up into the crowd and noticed Draco staring down at him. Instead of either glaring at him or thinking on Quidditch techniques, Malfoy had bit the inside of his lip and let the smallest of smiles overcome his lips. Harry couldn't stop the smile that wanted to show back.
Halloween came and went with a big feast in the Great Hall. Harry hadn't been too hungry but he tried to force down small portions of many different foods. Across the room, Harry caught Draco's eye for a brief second before going back to his conversation with Ron over his favorite Quidditch team, the Chudley Cannons. Going to bed that night may as well have been heaven for him. It was the first time since the whole messy ordeal started that he actually felt peace and the first time since he realized he liked Draco that he may actually have a chance of liking him back. Maybe he had a chance to be with Draco one day and Harry was surprised to find that single thought warmed him on the inside more than any other thought to ever cross his mind. Harry didn't think he had slept so well in all his life.
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"And where were the two of you this morning?" Harry teased Ron and Hermione as they walked into Herbology. They glanced at each other, wide and secret smiles spreading across both faces.
"Actually," said Ron, still looking at Hermione, "we skipped breakfast and stayed in the common room. I told Hermione that I had something to talk to her about."
"I see," Harry replied, sitting down next to Ron. "And what did you need to talk about?"
"Well first we talked about you," answered Hermione. "But then Ron took your advice and told me he liked me."
"I can't believe you were working us both," Ron added. "You knew she liked me and she never told me."
"That isn't completely true," Harry argued back. "I did tell you that Hermione liked you. I just didn't tell you that I knew because we talked about it. She's my friend. I had to keep her secret. Would you have wanted me telling Hermione that you liked her?"
"I suppose not," Ron replied, finally tearing his eyes away from Hermione and just long enough to look at Harry. "But thanks for pushing me into telling her. Unfortunately, you were right again."
"Of course I was. So does that mean you're together?" Harry asked and they responded by holding up their hands to show Harry their interlocked fingers. Grinning, Harry said, "Should I take that as a yes?"
Hermione nodded. "Yes, you should. Thank you, Harry, for encouraging him. You were right when you said I was scared to tell him."
"I know I was," responded Harry, looking around for Professor Sprout.
"There's just one thing," Ron said at length, looking at Harry with a nervous expression painted across his face. "No matter what happens, you'll always be my best friend and Hermione's friend as well, but now that Hermione and I are together, we'll be wanting to spend a lot more time together. Alone."
Harry tried not to look too happy at the thought of having more time alone to analyze his thoughts on Draco and pondering his recently discovered crush. Not only that, but alone time meant Draco watching. "I understand," he told them. "Don't worry about it."
"Well," Hermione said, "Ron and I were hoping that we could have some time to ourselves when we go to Hogsmeade. If that's okay with you."
"I told you not to worry about it," Harry instructed. "Take all the alone time together that you need. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine."
Professor Sprout walked into the greenhouse just then and began instructing the class on today's lesson of planting dingabumbs. Harry's mind, however, wasn't on Herbology, much less dingabumbs. Lately, it seemed, Harry wasn't able to focus on anything he was expected to. It was starting to annoy him. All of his thoughts would lead back to Draco Malfoy and this morning held no exception. Last night Draco hadn't come to dinner and this morning, Harry was so preoccupied with Ron and Hermione's absence that he wasn't sure if Malfoy showed up there, either.
At least the trip to Hogsmeade would give Harry some time for watching Draco. It seemed that Malfoy took every free chance he got to get out of Hogwarts and Harry was certain, without a doubt, that Draco would be there. Harry would use his independence from Ron and Hermione as an opportunity because with them so involved in each other, it would leave little room for them to be focused on Harry. The less focus concentrated on him, the lesser the chance that they would find out about his Draco infatuation.
He was partnered with Hannah Abbot and Harry was constantly finding himself apologizing for spacing out on her as they planted the dingabumbs at the same tray. Across the room, Harry could see Ron and Hermione working together, talking in low whispers and giggling. The lesson dragged on as Harry continued to make a disaster out of the Herbology assignment. Hannah was becoming increasingly irritated with him and Harry felt guilty for dazing so much. He really didn't know how to stop it because he so obviously tried. His mind still wandered back to Draco or Ron and Hermione and try as he may, it was to no avail.
Class ended and they all went back to Transfiguration. Harry was fairly sure that he fell asleep that class period but it didn't matter because the entire thing was a lecture, though Harry wasn't quite sure on what. They headed for the Gryffindor dormitory afterwards and stayed there until the time for lunch approached. As the time drew closer, pounding feet could be heard and everyone in the common room looked up to see Seamus Finnigan running through the portrait hole, leaning over, and huffing for air.
"Has anyone heard about Draco Malfoy?" Seamus panted and the room answered with a collective no.
At Seamus's words, Harry could immediately feel himself going sick, his stomach lurching around in jerky spasms. Nothing but concern and worry filled his sense and all his peripheral vision seemed to be lost. The only person in the room other than Harry himself was Seamus, the carrier of news of Draco. Harry knew Draco hadn't been at dinner or breakfast and now he knew it was because something was wrong.
"What's up with Malfoy," Ron asked, shattering Harry's illusion and he was suddenly aware of everyone in the room. He exchanged glances with both Ron and Hermione.
"Is he badly hurt from yesterday?" Hermione added.
"No," answered Seamus. "Its nothing like that. Since he left Care for Magical Creatures early yesterday, Malfoy has been holed up in the Slytherin common room. He went to see Madam Pomfrey for his arm first. Ever since, he won't leave the Slytherin dormitory or common room. Dumbledore is being sent down there right now to coax him out."
"What's wrong with him?" Harry asked, ignoring most of the laughter and snickers in the room from people who were less than fond of Malfoy.
"Nothing's actually wrong," Seamus answered, and this seemed to amuse the Gryffindors even more. "Even Snape seems pretty mad from all the commotion Malfoy's causing. Keeps telling the Slytherins to tell the professors that he's not coming out. I was walking to lunch when I heard Pansy Parkinson tell the Slytherin girls that Malfoy told McGonagall he isn't ever coming out again. He told her that if she wants him out, she's going to have to come in there and magic him out. If Dumbledore can't convince him to come out, they're going to have to call Malfoy's father. I mean, honestly, nothing is wrong with him. He just won't come out." More sniggers could be heard from the Gryffindors at this.
"People don't just not come out of their rooms for no reason," Harry muttered to himself. Ron and Hermione were quiet compared to the rest of the room and both seemed to be thinking what Harry had just said.
People don't just barricade themselves in their rooms and refuse to come out for no reason. Harry had a sinking feeling that whatever the reason was, it was due in a large part to whatever Draco claimed to be "too much to deal with" on the first night Harry saw him. Now Draco, though physically well, had seemed to mentally shut down and was refusing to come out. More than anything, Harry wanted to go down to the dungeons and try to get Malfoy to come out. The only problem was, Malfoy still hated Harry.
"Where are you going?" Harry heard Ron ask and he looked up to see Fred and George heading for the portrait hole.
"I want to see this," replied Fred, laughing.
"It isn't every day that a student refuses to leave his common room and Dumbledore has to be summoned," George added. "And it isn't just any student. This is Draco Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy's son that we're talking about. I'd take pictures if I could."
"Good idea," he heard Fred call back.
"Fred and George!" Hermione called, stunned. "It isn't nice to go down there and stare. If Malfoy isn't coming out, he's doing this for a reason. No one just refuses to leave their common room without a reason, even if it turns out to be a bad one."
"Well then stay here," Fred told her. "No one is making you go."
"I'm coming," Ron said, standing up and following. "After everything Malfoy's done and all the times he's made fun of us, I need to see this with my own eyes. I can't believe you're still defending Malfoy after all he's done to you, me, and Harry. Are you going to just ignore the fact that his father is a Death Eater?"
"No," she answered, joining Ron by his side, "but just because Lucius is in a league with Voldemort, it doesn't mean that Draco is."
Ron laughed. "I wouldn't count on that. But even if he wasn't, he's still got time to become one. The Malfoy family is and it's only a matter of time before Malfoy joins, too," Ron pointed out. "He's expected to, Hermione. Malfoy doesn't really have a choice, not that he seems to want one. Harry? You coming?"
"If everyone else is going, I guess I will too," Harry answered, trying to hide his excitement. Not only was he going down to see Malfoy with other people so it wouldn't look suspicious, but some things were starting to make sense. Of course Draco's father was a Death Eater and of course Draco was expected to follow where Lucius led. Draco really didn't have a choice and that probably made his life a lot harder to deal with. Maybe even too much to deal with. That part was finally so clear. So obvious. Why hadn't he seen it before? Then again, there seemed to be a lot of things concerning Draco that Harry never noticed before.
'I was probably too clouded by my crush on Malfoy,' Harry thought, bitterly.
"I'm really not too terribly surprised about this," said Hermione as they headed for the dungeons. "Malfoy has been acting rather strange lately. Remember in Potions when his cauldron bubbled over and then we saw him after class. He looked so melancholy. And Malfoy always does well in Potions. Then yesterday when the oberdun attacked him, Malfoy didn't even put on a big show about it. He just let it go."
"I told you I thought that was strange," said Ron. "He usually makes a big fuss, swears that his father is going to hear about it, and then tries to get Hagrid fired. You don't think that's what his intentions are now, do you? Maybe he's taken a different approach and is trying to make it seem that he was traumatized by the oberdun incident."
"I don't think that's it," Harry finally spoke up. "Malfoy was acting strange before that class yesterday."
Up ahead, there was a small crowd cluttering up the hallway in front of the Slytherin common room. Professor Snape was standing right by the entrance, the most petulant expression Harry had ever seen him wear spread across his face. It was an expression that Snape usually reserved for Harry. Seamus had been right about Snape and Malfoy was Snape's favorite student. The first person to spot their approach was Professor McGonagall, who left the entrance and walked over to them.
"I suggest you five turn around head right back to the common room," she said. "Classes for this afternoon have been canceled and there's nothing here for any of you to see. Mr. Malfoy isn't going to come out any sooner if he knows that students are waiting to tease him when he emerges."
"Is Dumbledore in there with him now?" asked Harry.
"Yes he is, Mr. Potter. Now I'll kindly ask you to go back to your common room before I have to deduct points from Gryffindor. Mr. Malfoy does not need a fan club waiting out here for him," she answered.
Fred and George turned around, disappointed, and left to go back to Gryffindor tower. "You coming, Harry?" Ron asked.
"Go ahead," Harry answered. "I'll be along in a minute. I want to have a quick word with Professor McGonagall." Ron and Hermione nodded, locking fingers and heading off for Gryffindor tower. Harry watched them go before turning back. "Professor McGonagall," called Harry and he caught Snape's irritated eye.
"What did I tell you, Mr. Potter?" said Professor McGonagall, coming over to him.
"I know, Professor," Harry responded, "but I wanted to have a quick word with you alone."
Her expression softened and she laid a hand on his shoulder, guiding him away. "Alright, Mr. Potter. What is it that you wanted to talk to me about?"
"Malfoy," responded Harry. "This is all going to remain privately between the two of us, right? Because it's kind of personal and if its not going to stay private, then I don't want to talk about it."
"I assure you, everything you say will be in the strictest of confidentiality," she assured as they walked down the halls.
"Well, I guess you can't tell me what's wrong with Malfoy," started Harry, "but I'm worried. I know that there's this big feud between Malfoy and me, but lately I haven't been hating him. I'm starting to see that there's more to Malfoy than what he leads on."
"You're growing up, Harry," Professor McGonagall replied. "I couldn't be more proud of you. Its very mature of you to be able to look past a school boy feud, especially when the person in question insults you and your best friends."
"But that's all Malfoy really knows," pointed out Harry. "All he's ever grown up hearing. Its not secret that Lucius Malfoy hates Muggles and anything that has to do with them, including mudbloods and half-bloods. Of course that would be imprinted in his son's mind."
"Dumbledore is going to be happy to hear this," she said.
"You said you wouldn't tell," Harry accused.
"I'm not," she replied. "You are. I imagine it will only be a matter of time for you before you tell Professor Dumbledore. I'm just giving you a nudge in the right direction."
Harry sighed, nodding. "Alright, but I don't want anyone else to know. Especially not Hermione or Ron. Malfoy is so awful to them and I don't want them to think I'm feeling that way. At least not yet."
"I swore to you that it would stay in confidentiality and it shall," Professor McGonagall told him. "Now run along to the common room. I'll let Professor Dumbledore know that you want to talk to him and maybe he'll stop by Gryffindor if he can make any progress with Mr. Malfoy."
Harry nodded, turning around and walking to the common room. He was relieved to have gotten some of his feelings about Draco out in the open but there was still so much that Harry didn't dare tell her. Like the crush he had inadvertently developed on Malfoy or the fact that Harry had been following him around Hogwarts ground. Now McGonagall knew and the next step was telling Dumbledore what he could about his change of heart. Relief from being able to let some of his bottled up emotion out swept in great tides over Harry's body.
At the same time, a voice panicked inside his head. Now that someone knew, all he had was her word that she wouldn't tell anyone the way Harry was feeling. If there was anyone Harry could trust with this, it would be McGonagall and Dumbledore, but that didn't ease his mind. Harry's worst fear was that McGonagall would tell the teachers and before long, everyone, including Malfoy himself, would know. The thought alone made Harry feel sick to his stomach. Draco, clearly, still hated Harry just as much if not more than last year, the year before, and the year before that, going al the way back to their first year at Hogwarts.
Harry muttered the password and Harry was admitted into the common room. It was alive with gossip and chatter as Harry wandered over by the fire where Ron and Hermione were sitting. He dropped into an armchair, wishing that it weren't only the afternoon because Harry wanted to escape to the dormitory. Unfortunately, for Harry to disappear upstairs, it would look suspicious and he had already stayed behind to talk to Professor McGongall. He couldn't go anywhere either just in case Dumbledore made progress with Malfoy or just came to talk to Harry.
The hours before dinner passed, filled with idle chatter over classes, Quidditch, and Brewner, the new female Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Draco Malfoy and his escapade in the Slytherin common room, however, was the hot topic of discussion in the Gryffindor common room and Harry could have kissed Hermione in gratitude when she insisted that they back off. He, instead, decided that he'd leave the kissing of Hermione to Ron. Dumbledore hadn't shown up by the time for dinner approached and Harry silently followed his friends down to the Great Hall.
Upon entering, Harry's eyes immediately went to the Slytherin table and Harry's breath caught in his throat when familiar white blond hair and silver eyes came into view. A frown was set on his pale, pointed face and from where Harry stood in the entrance, he could hear students from all four houses teasing Malfoy over the charade. After a quick inventory, Harry was pleased to see that Malfoy's arm was indeed fine though he didn't look happy at all. Instead of fighting back, a usual Malfoy response, Draco just let he insults fly at him as his head hung.
Ignoring the words coming from his fellow Gryffindors, Harry walked over to the Gryffindor table and began eating. He made sure to sit facing the Slytherin table, keeping his eyes on Draco as the table began to fill up with students and conversations started. He could hear Ron and Hermione talking about Draco's strange behavior but he opted for staying out of the conversation. Nothing he could say would make a difference anyway. Across from the Great Hall, Harry saw Draco lift his head and their eyes locked. Draco seemed to be waiting for something, perhaps for a sign of victory or smugness from Harry over seeing Draco fall apart right before his eyes. Draco's eyes and face never hardened but instead remained dead, expecting and waiting for Harry the acknowledge the triumph. Harry's expression softened and he offered Draco a small smile of reassurance, careful not to look pleased or smug.
He expected Draco to get mad at the gesture or even let it roll of his back without protest like he did for everything else that was being thrown his way. The last thing Harry expected to see was the small smile that crept across Draco's face in reply before his eyes fell away from Harry and back to his plate. Thinking it over, Harry thought that might have been the first real and genuine smile he had ever seen on Draco Malfoy's pointed face. One that didn't come from the amusement at the expense of another. The change of pace was somewhat refreshing.
From behind him, Harry could hear a throat being cleared and he turned around to see Professor Dumbledore standing there, looking down at him. "Mr. Potter," he said, "I see you've finished here. Would you care to take a walk with me."
Harry, knowing what Dumbledore was getting at, looked from Ron to Hermione to McGonagall before he turned back to Dumbledore and nodded. He caught Draco's inquisitive eyes before standing and following Dumbledore out of the Great Hall and the school. "I understand that you wanted to talk to me about something," Dumbledore jumped in, avoiding the usual niceties.
"Professor McGonagall didn't tell you what?" asked Harry.
"No," answered Professor Dumbledore, "she told me that it was a private matter between the two of you and that you wanted to be the one to tell me."
"Yes," Harry answered, looking around to make sure no one but himself and Dumbledore was listening, immediately followed by Harry thinking that he wouldn't have done that had be not been spying on Draco so much. "Its about Malfoy."
"Mr. Malfoy? He's been through a lot today, and given your history, I'm not surprised you have Mr. Malfoy on your mind. What is it about now?"
"Well," Harry started before his voice trailed off, "it seems that lately Malfoy has been unhappy and he isn't acting how he usually does. His behavior is out of character and then today, he refused to come out of the Slytherin common room. I've actually been concerned. Professor McGonagall says I'm growing up and that she's proud of my maturity. I'm just worried about Malfoy and it isn't like I can say anything to him because we have the feud."
When Harry turned to look at Dumbledore, he also seemed to be beaming with pride. It takes a big man to love his enemy and see that there is more to a person than what he shows. You've done that here with Mr. Malfoy and I am proud of you as well."
"Please don't mention this to anyone," Harry pleaded. "I don't want anyone to know, especially Ron, Hermione, and Malfoy. They just wouldn't understand."
"I think Mr. Malfoy just may surprise you but if you insist, your secret is safe with me."
"I suppose you couldn't tell me why Malfoy refused to come out of the common room," Harry said.
"Only Mr. Malfoy knows that, my dear boy. He wouldn't disclose that information to anyone nor do I think he ever will. Perhaps he was just looking for some time alone and it exploded into the whole school knowing Mr. Malfoy did not want to leave the common room."
"But could you tell me how you got him to come out?" asked Harry.
"Between you and me, Mr. Malfoy just needed some time for himself and so it didn't take much to get him out. I think it became a matter of principle once we were trying to get him to come out. All I really had to do was suggest sending for Lucius and Draco came right out. He, however, requested that the teachers not meddle in the teasing Draco expected. Wanted to handle it himself."
Harry nodded, understanding why Draco wouldn't want his professors fighting his battles for him, especially after the commotion that came from Draco hiding out in his common room. They walked back to Hogwarts and parted ways inside the school. Harry hurried to the common room, not caring about having to make conversation and be sociable before bed. The next day marked a visit to Hogsmeade with Ron and Hermione off on their own. That left Harry with plenty of time for watching Draco and he had smiled at dinner. Hopes for Harry were high and Harry wasn't going to allow anything to destroy them.
Harry was in high spirits for the rest of the night and got in bed early awaiting the trip to Hogsmeade. Though finding difficulty in falling asleep, Harry finally found himself drifting off to a dreamland. Off in a deep sleep, Harry had a rather pleasant dream involving Draco, though Harry couldn't exactly put his finger on what happened in it. Dressing without delay, he and Ron rushed down to the common room and, joining Hermione, set off for breakfast.
All during breakfast, Harry kept his eyes focused on Draco's bent figure. His happy mood vanished upon seeing Draco, his skin paler than usual and thin lines drawn at the corners of his eyes. Picking more at his food than actually eating, Draco didn't look up once during breakfast to catch Harry's eye nor to join in any conversation at the Slytherin table. He just stared at his plate, picking at his food, and remained silent with his lips drawn into a taut, pencil thin line.
Breakfast passed fairly quickly, over before Harry even realized people were leaving, and he stood up to join the other students going to Hogsmeade. Fortunately for Harry, Draco was among them. He had been fearing taking the trip to Hogsmeade and discovering that Draco stayed behind or something equally as bad.
Harry kept out of most conversation on the way to Hogsmeade and detached from Ron and Hermione immediately upon arrival. He strolled up and down the streets, trying to look like he wasn't just waiting for the right time to start following Draco. Once he was sure they had been there long enough, Harry began keeping his eyes focused on looking for Draco. Scanning the crowd, Harry wasn't paying much attention to where he was walking when he smacked into a body and went tumbling backward.
Looking up through his strands of black hair that had fallen into his eyes, Harry saw Cho Chang offering her hand to help him up. "Are you okay?" she asked.
"Yeah," Harry answered, ignoring Cho and searching for Draco again. "Sorry about that." Without another word, Harry's eyes landed on Draco and he walked away, heading in Malfoy's general direction.
Harry weaved through people until he was close to Malfoy bust still a safe distance away. Waiting until he wasn't flanked by Crabbe and Goyle, Harry followed Draco in whatever direction he took. Disappearing into Honeydukes, Draco stayed outside while his friends were loading up on sweets. Taking this as his chance, Harry strolled across the street to where Draco was standing.
"Hey, Malfoy," Harry said, standing in front of Draco.
"What do you want, Potter?" Draco spit back at him.
Draco's venom caught Harry off guard after yesterday's smile and he stood there, dumbfounded, and reaching for words. "I was just," Harry stammered. "I mean. Yesterday."
"I don't need your pity, Potter," Draco drawled. "I may have smiled but that does not mean that we are friends. Just because you weren't harassing me over my episode or talking about my episode, it doesn't mean that I'm going to be nice to you or your mudblood and muggle loving friends. Speaking of which, I heard they're an item now. How absolutely perfect. The Weasleys are a disgrace to wizarding families, associating with mudbloods like that."
"Shove it, Malfoy," Harry retorted before he could stop himself and the pleased smirk came across Draco's face that he wore so often. Harry thought he liked it better when it was real. Draco was beautiful no matter what, but he real smile made him look even more so. "Look, I didn't come over here to fight with you, Malfoy. Yesterday, for a minute, I actually thought there was some good in you. I must have been mistaken."
"You were," Draco bit back and he turned around just as both Crabbe and Goyle were coming back onto the street. Harry noticed once again that the venom never reached Draco's eyes.
Harry spent the remainder of his time walking up and down the roads and thinking of Draco. His words didn't matter because eyes and tone of voice reveal everything. Draco's words were harsh but his eyes were begging for a release. One thing Harry noticed was that Draco admitted to the smile, more than Harry expected him to do, and that painted hope back into Harry's world.
With Ron and Hermione, they headed back to Hogwarts and Harry kept himself from thinking about Draco by teasing Ron and Hermione. The playful jesting lightened Harry's mood and he was happy to be talking to his friends again after a long day. He wouldn't let Draco's words discourage him. That smile, tone of voice, and those eyes betrayed him, did him in, and there was no way those words could mean anything now. Actions speak louder than words and Draco's were screaming for mercy.
Harry went to bed that night just as happy if not happier than he had the night before. Draco, as always, weighed heavy on his mind and Harry kept replaying that smile over and over again in his head. Today's events may not have advanced things, but Harry wouldn't call them a step in the wrong direction, either. All together, Harry felt that they broke even in the end with all things concerned. Even if Draco was in denial over the estranged but hopefully forming friendship, Harry wasn't going to let himself be talked out of trying.
The next few days passed with a few Draco sightings and Harry was ready to scream out of frustration. The longer Harry watched him, the more hopeless and empty that Draco seemed to become. He found himself falling harder for Draco every single day. Each time Harry saw him, Draco looked a little more beautiful than the last and Harry was about ready to just run up and kiss him without being scared of the consequences. Those lips were so tempting and if Harry could, he'd kiss away the pain Draco was feeling. If only Draco would let him.
Gryffindor won the Quidditch game against Hufflepuff and Angelina congratulated Harry on an excellent catch of the Snitch. Ron was ecstatic to be part of a winning Quidditch team and he and Harry stayed up late with Hermione celebrating the first Gryffindor win that Ron was a part of. After the game, as Harry had been walking off the field and Ron was up ahead, hugging Hermione and giving her kisses, he looked up into the crowd and noticed Draco staring down at him. Instead of either glaring at him or thinking on Quidditch techniques, Malfoy had bit the inside of his lip and let the smallest of smiles overcome his lips. Harry couldn't stop the smile that wanted to show back.
Halloween came and went with a big feast in the Great Hall. Harry hadn't been too hungry but he tried to force down small portions of many different foods. Across the room, Harry caught Draco's eye for a brief second before going back to his conversation with Ron over his favorite Quidditch team, the Chudley Cannons. Going to bed that night may as well have been heaven for him. It was the first time since the whole messy ordeal started that he actually felt peace and the first time since he realized he liked Draco that he may actually have a chance of liking him back. Maybe he had a chance to be with Draco one day and Harry was surprised to find that single thought warmed him on the inside more than any other thought to ever cross his mind. Harry didn't think he had slept so well in all his life.
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