Thank you so much to all my reviewers and anyone who was kind and sweet enough to put me on their favorites list. I am truly flattered. You're all very sweet and I will try to update faster for all my fans and fans of 'Overheard'. Much love,
~Kiara
DISCLAIMER: I am not JK
Rowling and the world of Harry Potter does not belong to me. I wish it did, but
it doesn't. I am making no money off this trifle of a story.
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Harry barely had time to get inside the astronomy tower before the door slammed shut behind him and he found himself pushed up against the door with Draco's body covering his own in length. The warmth of Draco's mouth was hot as it meshed with his own in a wild contrast to the soft flesh of his lips moving in a sweet, intoxicating rhythm with Harry's. He gasped at the surprise attack and he felt Draco's tongue sweep across his lips before sliding inside and moving along his own tongue in long, slick strokes. Harry moaned into the kiss and then whimpered when their tongues stopped dancing and the heat was lost as Draco pulled away.
"What was that for?" asked Harry, breathless, as he clutched to his chest and stared into Draco's lustful eyes.
"For every time today you kept my mind away from school work and on you instead. You know what you made me do, Potter?" he drawled as if he were bored in such a foreign but familiar tone that felt like it belonged to anyone but the man standing before him. Draco winked. "I killed myself in Divination seven times today. Naturally, Trelawney was ready to pass me to a sixth year already. I was just so distracted thinking about you. I even started making things up."
"You actually do your Divination work the way you're supposed to?"
"Usually. You had me very distracted, Harry."
"Did I?" asked Harry, cocking an eyebrow. "I bet you were real distracted by me in Care of Magical Creatures, too, weren't you? You know, I think Chester was right all along. I'd much rather eat you than the sweets any day."
Draco raised an eyebrow. "Really? Well I, for one, wanted to kill that mifflepuff. Quite a nuisance. Made me look like a fool. But when you put it that way, I can't help but want to agree with you. I'd much rather have you than sweets as well." Draco reclaimed Harry's mouth with a kiss. Grasping Harry around the wrists, Draco pulled him down to the floor and they sat wrapped up in each other. "Do you have the cloak?"
"Got it right there," replied Harry, holding it up for Draco to see. "I missed you all day."
"Missed you, too," Draco muttered. Lying out on the ground, Draco stretched his limbs taut, sighing as Harry lay down next to him. His muscles tensed up at first when he felt Harry's head dropping to his shoulder but he forced himself to relax and Draco soon found his fingers sifting through Harry's mass of unruly black hair. "Can you believe this?" Draco finally asked. "After four years of clawing at each other's throats in hate, here we are, laying side by side as boyfriends. Lame, isn't it?"
"A little," answered Harry, trying to conceal a small laugh. "After everything we've gone through together. I can't believe we're together. We're a couple. It's so strange to say but it feels so right." Harry sighed, readjusting himself to rest his body up against Draco's. "Draco, will you talk to me? Tell me everything you're feeling and everything that keeps going through your head?"
"That's a lot to tell," Draco commented in almost a hushed whisper. "I'll try, though. I'll try for you because I want this relationship to work between us and I don't think that will happen as long as I withhold information from you." Pausing, Draco extracted a long sigh and turned his body to fit snugly into the contours of Harry's. Harry wrapped his arms around Draco, palms laying flat on the smooth surface of Draco's back and his thumb rubbed lazy circles on the material of Draco's shirt. A shaky breath escaped his mouth and Harry held Draco closer to his body. "Everything is so complicated," said Draco. "My father wants me to be a Death Eater and he keeps going on about how wonderful I'll be. When I was young, I never got reprimanded for being bad. If you're a Malfoy, you get praised for being bad. I know there is supposed to be a right and a wrong but for me, wrong was right and right was wrong. If you can twist it like that, right becomes right when it was originally wrong, and wrong becomes wrong when it was originally right. Things get so confusing that you can't keep it straight anymore. When it gets to be like that, I just can't have faith in it. I can't believe in a wrong and a right anymore. Things are just appropriate for the time and place they occur in."
"That's understandable," Harry whispered in Draco's ear, causing him to shiver. "But not everything is like that, Draco."
"It is, though. Everything is backwards and its like that everywhere you go. Nothing is simple, especially not when it comes to matters of my father and Voldemort." He paused, burying his face in the crook of Harry's neck. "It is complicated like that. We grew up in different worlds, Potter. You've only ever been taught that there is such a thing as right and wrong and that you can have faith in the system. You grew up on the good side. Precious Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived."
"Draco," interrupted Harry, lifting a hand to stroke Draco's hair but he pulled back when Draco tore himself away, stood up, and began pacing the length of the room. "Draco," he tried again, "I may have been Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived to you but I grew up with the Dursleys. I grew up never knowing that my parents were a witch and wizard, much less that I was one, and a famous one at that. They told me that my parents died in a car crash and I never even heard Voldemort's name until Hagrid came for me and I found out about Hogwarts. When I met you in Madam Malkin's robe shop, that was the first time I ever even heard of Quidditch. You made me feel like quite the dolt."
"And do you know how much I envy you for that?" Draco practically screamed down to Harry. "All my life I had to hear about Voldemort and how he would one day rise again to power. I had to hear about how when Voldemort returned, we would be there to support him. Even after my father thought Voldemort was gone for good, I still had to hear about the dark arts. I never knew a wrong and a right, not in the way that you did. All I ever knew was evil. My father doesn't even treat me like I'm his son anymore. All he knows is that I need to uphold the Malfoy name and the Malfoy honor. I can't disappoint my father. What makes people weak is that they think everything is about love. Nothing is about love. It doesn't exist. You know what does exist, Harry? Pride exists. Vengeance exists. Honor exists. Thos are the things that matter because those are the things that make the world go round."
"You're wrong," Harry said in a voice so low, so confident that it almost intimidated himself. He rose to his feet, standing face to face with Draco. "You're wrong. Love is real. My parents died out of their love for me. Just because your father is weak and can't love you doesn't mean that love isn't real."
Draco spun around, walking away from Harry and the click of his heels on the cold stone ground echoed off, reverberating on the walls of the spacious and mostly empty room in hollow taps. "My father isn't weak," he said as he turned around to stare down Harry. "I idolize my father. He's everything I should be and everything I can't. If anyone is weak, it's me. You can say love exists and maybe when you grow up knowing good, it is real, but I don't believe in it. I'm incapable of the emotion. No Malfoy can love. All a Malfoy knows is pride and honor."
"You keep talking about Malfoy pride and honor. Draco, you don't have to do anything that you don't want to do. It doesn't matter what people expect of you because all that matters is what you want and who you are. It mattes what you make of yourself. Who Draco is, not who you should be just because you're unfortunate enough to be a Malfoy. None of that mattes, Draco. All that matters is what you want to make of yourself."
"You don't get it, do you, Harry?" Draco said with almost a sadistic laugh. "If I don't follow my father, become a Death Eater, they'll kill me. They don't tell me anything but I know too much. I'll die. I have no choice, Harry."
"You do have a choice. You're already thinking about killing yourself because of this, Draco. I know we haven't even been together for a full day but I really care about you and I can't have you dying on me. You can say no, Draco. You don't have to be anything just because you're a Malfoy. We can fight them together."
"Is that what this all comes back to?" Draco spit out. "I have to uphold the Malfoy honor, Harry. Just by being with you I'm going against my father and protecting you is as far as I'm willing to stray. You don't understand what it means to be a Malfoy."
"Do you?" Harry shot back and Draco gave a short, exasperated laugh in reply. "No, Draco. Do you really know what it means to be a Malfoy because I'm hearing a good deal about honor and pride all from groveling at Voldemort's feet and licking his ass"
"Harry, you don't have the slightest idea as to what you're talking about. I'm proud of my lineage. A pureblood Slytherin. A Malfoy. I come from a family of great wizards. I can't disappoint my family. I can't disappoint my father. It's my responsibility to uphold the Malfoy honor. The Malfoy name."
"Is that you or your father speaking?" Harry snapped back. "You can talk about honor and pride until you're blue in the face but you don't believe a word of what you're saying. You've been programmed since you were young to think and talk this way."
"Don't presume that you can tell me what I do and don't believe in. Maybe I don't know who I am anymore or what I believe in. Maybe I don't know what it means to be a Malfoy. Maybe I don't want to be a Death Eater and maybe all I do want is for my father to care about me. Does it really matter? All I know is that I always intended to follow my father and then somewhere along the way, I went and grew up. And now here I am, deeply immersed and caring about the one person I'm supposed to hate. I was always told to hate you because you caused Voldemort's fall," Draco said, his voice growing soft as it continued. "Instead of hating you, I could kiss you for it."
"So do it," replied Harry in the same soft and vulnerable tone.
They came together, Draco wrapping tentative arms around Harry's body and feeling his own relax, if only slightly, under Harry's touch. His lips twitched as they curled into a soft, embarrassed smile and he titled his head forward, lightly pressing his forehead against Harry's. A delicate kiss was placed to Harry's lips as if he were afraid to damage the fragile tissue there and cause it to bruise.
"You know," Harry half whispered, "I thought you were all evil but that one night by the lake changed everything. I thought I knew everything but now I know that I don't have any answers anymore. Maybe I don't know everything, but I do know that you have the choice to choose your own path. There's nothing you need to hide from me and there's nothing you can say that will change my mind."
Draco nodded, the smooth skin of his forehead skating across Harry's in a gentle sweep. "I know. You're a Gryffindor and while I know you're supposed to be brave, chivalrous, and all that, you're also a stubborn prat. I may not believe what you're saying, but I appreciate you saying it," Draco remarked. "Maybe one day I will say no to my father, but I doubt it. I still look up to him. I'm still a Malfoy, Harry. Even if there's a good chance I'll leave you and follow my father, I want to be with you now. Can you truly say that you're willing to risk all that?"
"As long as I get to be with you."
The fell to the ground together, arms still embracing each other as they rocked on the floor. Draco found himself staring into Harry's wide and trusting emerald eyes and he could feel a pang of guilt settle deep within the caverns of his stomach. Telling Harry that he may one day leave him, wanting to win the approval of his father, and looking deep within Harry to see the trust lying behind his eyes was almost too much for Draco to take. He didn't want to hurt anybody but everything was coming back at him and Draco silently cursed himself. He supposed this is what he deserved for tormenting Harry for years.
"I was jealous," Draco mumbled, his lips brushing against Harry's.
"What?" asked Harry.
"I was jealous of you. You got all of the attention. You were the fabulous Harry Potter, Hogwarts's golden boy. You're the Boy-Who-Lived. I offered my friendship to you and you refused me. That hurt, Harry. I was jealous. I wanted what you had. Now I just want you."
Twining his fingers in Draco's hair, he inched his head forward so that their lips pressed gently together. Harry's eyes remained open, staring at the way Draco's eyelids had fluttered shut upon impact with a beautiful, feathery sweep. For some time they remained sitting together, wrapped in each other's arms. Draco could feel Harry's heartbeat against his chest, beating in time with his own heart and it jolted him into feeling sensations he never thought he could feel.
"We should get back to our rooms."
Harry's voice had broken the sweet silence causing Draco's world to come tumbling down on him. He wanted the moment to last forever, the two of them so close and living in time with the other. The moment was too perfect to break but Harry's voice had shattered it and he was left staring him in the eyes. Dumbly, he nodded and followed Harry to huddle close under the invisibility cloak, arms around each other as they walked inside.
Dropping Draco off just outside the Slytherin common room for a second night in a row, Harry leaned in for the final kiss goodnight. Slipping out from beneath the cloak, Draco mumbled the password, the stone wall opened up, and Draco disappeared inside. That night, Harry fell asleep thinking of Draco like he did so many nights before and wondering what it would be like to fall asleep in those arms.
*~*~*~*~*
Waking the next morning, Harry moved through his school day without too much trouble. He managed to keep his focus on his studies, pushing Draco thoughts far back into the recesses of his mind where the cobwebs hung over forgotten memories like Dudley Dursley and the days before Hogwarts. Even the knowledge of Snape and double Potions after lunch didn't ruin his day or derail his thought process. Unfortunately, Draco would be there and Harry was lucky enough to have Hermione for a partner. Ron would be the one working by his boyfriend's side. The jealousy he felt was blinding, but at the same time, Harry was happy that he wasn't working with Draco because if they were partners, nothing that had anything to do with Potions would get done. At least they wouldn't burn a hole through any cauldrons, though, and Harry looked at that as a positive side.
He sat at lunch, a smile brought to his face just from thinking about the last Potions class when Draco had added too much asphodel and burned a large hole into the side of Ron's cauldron. For the entire day thus far, Harry had been spending more and more time with Ron like they used to. His spirits had lifted and he realized just how much he missed Ron and his older brothers, Fred and George's, pranks. They were now regaling Harry with a tale involving some of their homemade trick sweets and Filibuster fireworks in the Hufflepuff dormitories. Harry couldn't stop laughing at the tale and he caught Hermione scowling, clearly disapproving of the escapade. After weeks of pining, his heart felt lightweight and free. Even Colin and Dennis Creevy's pestering about taking his photograph wasn't as annoying as usual.
When lunch ended, Harry walked down to the dungeons with Ron and Hermione as they reluctantly headed to their least favorite class of Potions. They were still laughing about a joke Fred made over Percy's new assignment at the ministry of magic, which involved the investigation of lazy mail owls. Even if his words hadn't been funny, which they always were, his impersonation would have been, imitating Percy with perfection.
"Well if it isn't Potty, the Weasel and his girlfriend, the Mudblood," came a cool, drawling voice and the three spotted Draco leaning against the wall by the Potions classroom as they approached. Crabbe and Goyle stood on either side of him snickering, and Pansy was clutched to his arm, sneering at Hermione. Harry stared at him, trying to look mad but doing an awful job if the amused smirk on Draco's face was any sign. "Plan on burning anything today, Weasel?"
"That was your fault Malfoy," accused Ron. "You were in charge of the asphodel and stop calling Hermione that."
"No," retorted Draco, sounding much like he did in their first year upon stealing Neville Longbottom's Rememberall and wouldn't give it back. "I'll call her a mudblood because she is one. She must be a great shag or you're really desperate to have kept Granger around this long. Does she give great hed, Weasel? Maybe I should have looked into that."
Hermione went pale and Harry couldn't tell if she was going to cry or smack Malfoy again. Both Crabbe and Goyle seemed to have found this display hysterical and Pansy still clung to his arm. Harry himself had to suppress the urge to hit Malfoy and he held back Hermione and Ron from doing the same.
"Don't hit him," commanded Harry, holding back Ron and Hermione as he glared at Malfoy. He was then surprised, realizing he had become Malfoy in his thoughts again. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he continued, "Malfoy isn't worth the waste of energy."
Draco's eyes faltered, clearly shaken by the use of his last name with so much malice laced into it. He searched Harry with pleading eyes, a silent plea for the acceptance of his genuine apology. In a silent peace offering that only the two of them picked up on enough to understand, Draco shoved Pansy away from his arm in annoyance and disgust. She didn't look pleased.
"I love her," Ron sneered at Malfoy. "I keep her around because I love her, but you don't know anything about love, do you?"
Draco's eyelids dropped in a languid flutter, his lips pursed together and arms crossed over his chest. His lips slightly parted as if he were about to say something, but they closed again without much more than a soft but strangled undistinguishable sound. Reopening his eyes, there was a visible sheen layer of teardrops coating his eyes and Draco blinked them away. His teeth nipped in vicious attacks at his lower lip, pulling off bits of chapped skin and a thin trickle of crimson blood peaked out from the slit. Without another word, he brushed past Ron, Harry, and Hermione, heading inside the classroom.
"Did you see that?" Hermione almost whispered in wonder once Draco, Pansy, Crabbe, and Goyle had gone into class. "I knew something was different about Malfoy and today he was clearly trying to regress to his old self but - you almost made him cry, Ron!"
"He deserved every word I said," Ron muttered and walked into class leaving a bewildered Harry and Hermione to follow suit. He reluctantly strolled over to where Draco sat and Harry watched Ron as he and Draco silently set out to recreate the first part of their potion. Harry turned to Hermione, already retrieving the first part and searching for the parchment with the instructions on the second part.
Snape was already looming over Neville and Seamus, a pairing that was doomed to disaster from the moment it was ordered. Occasionally he'd glance at Draco and Ron with a grimace set on his face and Harry guessed that he was not so fondly remembering what happened last time. Hermione nudged him, showing Harry the directions for the second part of the potion and they began to work.
Potions passed without any major accidents, except for when Ron and Draco tried to hurry the second half of their potion and it went up in flames. Harry thought that Professor Snape turned ten shades of red before taking twenty points from both Gryffindor and Slytherin. Ron and Draco were asked not to come to the next lesson when the members of the class who actually had followed directions would be finishing the potion. Apparently, Harry wasn't the only one who was afraid of what they'd manage to do next. They had bowed their heads, nodding in compliance and defeat.
After dinner, Harry snuck out of Gryffindor with the invisibility cloak draped over his body, Draco's latest note still clutched in his tight fist. Upon opening it right after Potions, Harry didn't know whether to scowl or laugh at Draco's instructions to meet at Harry's hedges. In a way, though, he was grateful to be going back to them because after hiding in them for so long and now not being near them at all, Harry kind of missed his old hiding spot. That and after pining over Draco there, it would be a perfect place to meet. He gave Draco respects for that.
The thought of missing his hedges was so absurd that Harry wanted to laugh as he made his way to his former hiding spot where Draco had caught him. Actually missing those prickly hedges and the branches snagging at his hair and clothes was something he never thought that he'd be feeling.
Stepping outside, Harry glanced around before heading across the grounds and in the direction of the lake. It was like falling back into habit as Harry rounded the hedges and crawled inside, cursing at how the branches snagged the invisibility cloak. He looked around as he tried to get comfortable on the ground, not seeing any sign of Draco yet.
A few minutes passed until Harry could see Draco's silhouette slipping out of the school and slinking toward the hedges where Harry sat. His hair reflected the moonbeams as he dragged his body toward the lake and Harry could tell he was tired after coming from Quidditch practice. As he crept closer, Harry could just make out the light, fleeting and pattering of his feet on the ground.
"Harry?" he could hear Draco hiss as he stood at the spot where he first discovered Harry watching him. "Are you here yet?"
"Yeah," replied Harry, pulling back the invisibility cloak just long enough for Draco to find him and crawl through the hedges, slipping underneath and next to his boyfriend. "So you wanted to meet me here," he said with a hint of amusement in his voice. Draco shifted next to him and then leaned over to be sitting next to Harry with his head in Harry's lap.
"I thought this was a nostalgic place for us," Draco said once he had settled down. "The moonlight, the lake, and you hiding away in the hedges. Very nice place for you to decide to hide away in, by the way. I would have never noticed the bush shaking like it was."
"You should have ignored it," replied Harry. "Things at Hogwarts are very strange, you know. You should always ignore the bush."
"But if I'd've ignored it, then we wouldn't be together," countered Draco, "and I don't know about you, but I like this relationship we've got going."
"I like it too," Harry replied, running a hand over Draco's hair and cupping the back of his head with his palm, a thumb breaching the hairline. "Isn't this odd? Sneaking away at night to cuddle under the invisibility cloak and in the day, openly fighting. You really need to stop attacking my friends."
"Did you even hear what the weasel prat said to me today?" Draco countered, defensive.
"Yes, and I didn't like what he said to you but I also heard what you said to him first. Draco, that was uncalled for. I know you don't want to be their friends and I'm not asking you to, but they are my friends. Hermione and Ron are my friends always and they don't deserve the things you say to them. When you hurt them, you hurt me too. Just by being with you, I'm betraying them."
"Kind of like me with my father," Draco mumbled to himself. "I'm sorry, Harry. I do, however, have an image to uphold and its slipped enough this year as is with my constant self loathing for being too damn weak to do anything. The last thing I need to do is cease open hostility with you, a mudblood, and a Weasley. If my father found out-"
"I'm sick of hearing about your father," said Harry, cutting Draco off. "I'm not asking you to make them your best friends. The only thing I want is for you to stop calling Hermione a mudblood and stop calling Ron, Weasel. I don't like to hear my friends getting that kind of abuse and I really hate seeing them hurt. I'd do the same thing for you."
"Except that I don't have any real friends," Draco answered. "If you really want me to, I'll try not to insult your friends but I can't make any guarantees. Sometimes it seems like my tongue decides to do its own talking. I'll at least not call Granger a mudblood in front of you but I'm not going to be nice."
"I don't expect you to be," replied Harry. "A Malfoy? Nice? If you were actually nice to a person for a change, I'd die of shock."
"Shut up, Harry. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm nice to you. Well, as nice as I can be."
"I'm your boyfriend. You have to be nice to me. And even now you're rude and we fight."
"Well you're moody. I think you have chronic PMS," Draco replied and Harry pouted, giving him a light shove. Reaching up for Harry's hands, Draco slid his fingers between Harry's. "I've been thinking. It's going to be December in a few days and that means Christmas holidays are coming up. I'd really like us to spend our first Christmas as a couple together. Usually I go back to the Manor for Christmas and I know you usually stay at Hogwarts. Since there's no way I'm going to take you back to the Manor with me, I thought I could write home, tell my father I'm having trouble in Potions, and ask to stay. I didn't want to do it without your permission first, though."
Harry smiled down at Draco, giving his hand an affectionate squeeze as he nodded. "That thought crossed my mind yesterday. I want us to be together for Christmas, too. I'd really love it if you could stay."
"I'll take that as a greenlight," replied Draco. "I'll write home first thing in the morning. I won't be completely lying. I am having a hard time managing when it comes to Potions lately, and father is gong to want me to improve my grades. He hates it when I'm not at the top of my class."
Huddling closer together until Draco was practically planted in Harry's lap, they basked in the warmth of the other. The late November air was crisp, chilling, and only the body heat and shield of the hedges worked to keep them warm. Neither said a word, simply enjoying being in the other's presence without conversation, and it was only some time later when Draco found himself dozing that he suggested picking up and heading inside.
"You realize that you're the girlfriend, don't you?" asked Harry, chuckling, as they walked to the dungeons.
"What?" Draco asked. "I'm the girlfriend? How am I the girlfriend?"
"You lay your head in my lap and I walk you back to your common room every night. That's not even mentioning the fact that I've already held you," he explained, snickering.
"I like to be pampered because I'm spoiled and it's your invisibility cloak. The last thing I want is detention. That does not make me the girlfriend."
"Okay, Draco," said Harry, his voice saturated with skepticism, "whatever you say."
They stopped in front of the stone wall that led into the Slytherin common room. Draco took Harry's face into his hands, pulling him close, and lightly placing his lips to Harry's own.
"Goodnight," whispered Draco and he turned away, calling out the Slytherin password and disappeared inside.
"Goodnight," answered Harry, his fingers ghosting over his lips.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
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