Just as an overview of the reviews so far…I can't believe you love it that much.  I was truly nervous about not writing the Dursleys good enough.  These are my favorite chapters in this story because they release the tension from the preceding chapters.   I hope you like this one as much as I do (it's my favorite).

Kelly:  Pork chop seemed appropriate for Dudley, don't you think?

Lady Koneko Shin-Chan:  I do indeed have my own female version of Fred and George.  They're a great kick and I adore them.

Mikee:  I'm sorry to say there will be no Severus in this story.  He is my third favorite character and since my three favorites are so close it's practically indistinguishable, I understand wanting to see him in a story.  However, I am writing a story called 'Falling'.  There is a shameless plug for it at the bottom of the chapter but there will be a lot of Severus in that story in upcoming chapters if you were interested.

Grey Malfoy:  You don't have to tell me to keep writing.  I do it more than I eat (and I eat a lot).

RiseAgainPhoenix:  *blushes*

Dragonsbane:  *bows*  Thank you.  Thank you.

Da – xia Nariko:  I wasn't planning on having Uncle Vernon call Draco smart but, hey, Harry was reminded of Dudley when he first met Draco.  It seemed only natural that the Dursleys would take to him more than they take to Harry.

Leigh – Roslyn:  I hope this is good enough to follow up to the last chapter.  It's sort of an encore.

Ms. Trunks:  I can just see Draco walking around and trying not to be interested in muggle things but unable not to ask because he's so nosy.

SparkleMoonBunny:  I keep reading over where you said about the error and I don't think it needs to be changed.  *shrugs*  Oh well.  Here is your shout out!!!  Hah!  I thought it would be funny for Uncle Vernon to agree with Draco since Draco has all those Slytherin tendencies.

Ferretgirl1023:  Ladies and gentlemen, I present my sister, Jenny from the Block aka Niffer.  You idiot.  I read your review and I was like, "Who knew my nickname is Itzle?"  Then I saw your sn and I was like, "oh.  It's Jen!"  It's 6:45 am and you have a 2 hr delay from school.  I wrote the "Whee!"  "Sleys!" chapter last night.  Er – Yay Draco!

Everyone else who read and/or reviewed, thank you so much.  It really makes my day to sign online and see reviews (good ones at that).  Flames may be directed to my fireplace.  Wait!  I don't even have a fireplace!  Hahahahaha!

*excuses self to seek therapy*

Not JK Rowling.  Don't own Harry Potter.  Anything you recognize is hers.  The rest is unfortunate enough to be mine.  I have $10.00.  If you want to go through the trouble of suing me for it, go for it.  I am making (obviously) no money off this trifle of a story.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

When Harry awoke the next morning, it was to an empty spot beside him in bed.  He squinted, rolled over, and grabbed his glasses from the table next to his bed.  Putting them on, Harry looked around his bedroom to see Hedwig had come back to her cage over the night but Draco's eagle owl was still out and about from the looks of it.  Their trunks were stashed in the corner as were their broomsticks but there was no sight of Draco, himself, anywhere.  This worried Harry.  This worried Harry a lot.

Climbing out of bed, he dressed for the day and went downstairs to the kitchen.  He sighed from relief at seeing Draco seated at the kitchen table but that relief quickly disappeared when he saw that Draco had been sitting there, probably for some time by the look of Aunt Petunia's face, asking questions about electricity, light bobs, and the stove.  Seeing Harry standing in the doorway, Draco's sour expression disintegrated and he was left with a wide grin on his face.

"Morning, Harry.  How did you sleep?"

"Fine.  You?"

"It was just wonderful.  I woke up about an hour ago and I thought I'd let you sleep.  I do hope that was alright.  Your aunt said it was."

"It was fine.  Don't worry about it."

Just as Harry took a seat next to Draco at the kitchen table, Dudley and Uncle Vernon came in and sat down with them.  Plates piled high with sausages, eggs, toast, and bacon were set before them and both Harry and Draco received around a fourth of the portions.

"Sweet Merlin, no wonder you're so large," said Draco, looking to Dudley.  "Do you always eat that much?"

Dudley grunted and shoved a forkful of eggs into his mouth.

"Well," continued Draco, "it's no wonder you're so skinny, Harry.  You must have a terribly difficult time getting food when you're here.  If this is what is was like for you growing up, I understand why you're much smaller than the other boys.  Unfortunately, I have no excuse, but at least we're the perfect size for each other."

Harry gave a short laugh, something he never thought he'd actually do when having a meal with the Dursleys.  Draco just looked too cute, sitting next to him in a muggle home, wearing muggle clothing, and being fascinated by muggle things.  Apparently he who ruled over all that is pureblood wasn't as opposed to muggles as he seemed to have thought he was.

"So how about that Smelting stick?  You got it with you this morning?" asked Draco, looking up from his plate.

"I lost it," said Dudley.

"What?" snapped Uncle Vernon.  "You take it everywhere with you!  How could you have lost it?

"I don't know.  It's not in my room."

"Did you break it?"

"I don't know."

"Is there anything you do know, boy?"

"I want more sausages."

"Of course," muttered Draco.

"Of course my Duddykins," said Aunt Petunia as she went to get Dudley more sausages.

"Pity," said Draco, "I did want to have another good look at it.  Excellent idea, that Smelting stick."

There was a click of the mail slot opening and then a flop of letters on the doormat.

"Go get the mail, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon, taking a sip of coffee.

"I don't want to.  Make Harry do it."

"Get the mail, Harry."

"I don't want to.  Make Draco do it."

"Use your wand on him, Draco."

"I thought you don't like magic in the house," said Draco.

"This is an exception."

"Why doesn't Dudley just get it?  You asked him first."

"Because I don't want to," said Dudley through bites of his eggs.  Draco grimaced.

"I told you to get the mail, Harry."

Gaping, Harry stood up from the table and headed for the kitchen door, dragging his feet along the carpet.  Draco had followed behind, snickering.

"Harry, we found something the Dursleys hate more than magic," he said once they were at the door and out of earshot.

"Me?"

"Exactly.  I'm sorry you have to get pushed around by them.  I'd hex them but that probably wouldn't sit well with Dumbledore and as he's all I've got right now, I don't want to push my luck."

"He isn't all you've got."

"Yes but you don't count.  You have to love me."

"And I do."

Draco gave Harry a quick peck on the lips before leaning back against the wall as Harry picked up the mail.  Shuffling through the letters, he saw two brown envelopes that looked like bills, and an envelope that looked like a card, or a letter, for both Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon in Aunt Marge's handwriting.  He groaned loudly before walking back into the kitchen, Draco on his heels.  Harry shoved the mail in Uncle Vernon's face before sitting back down in his seat.

"Harry?" said Draco once they had returned.

"What?"

"Why do muggles put stickers on their envelopes?"

"First of all, they aren't stickers, they're stamps."

"So they're sticker stamps."

"No.  Just stamps.  You buy stamps and put them on your envelopes when you mail them.  It pays for your mail to be delivered."

"Why don't you just pay the postman directly?"

"Because you just don't."

"But don't you pay for the postman to deliver your mail by paying for the stamp?"

"I suppose so in a small part -"

"Well then why don't you pay the postman directly?"

"I don't know, Draco.  You just don't.  This is how muggles do it."

"Muggles make things far too complicated.  This Muggle Post is so much more difficult than the Owl Post.  It's crazy what these muggles think up.  I must admit that I'm impressed with how well they get along for having no magic at all but honestly, where do they come up with these things?  First light bobs and now sticker stamps."

"They're called light bulbs and its not a sticker stamp, it's just a stamp."

Harry was willing to bet that if the Dursleys knew Draco wasn't really supposed to use his wand, he'd be spending the rest of the month in the cupboard under the stairs.  Harry would probably have the pleasure of joining him.  If the Dursleys didn't want to hear about magic before, they had to be on overload.  The only thing keeping them from throwing Draco and Harry out all together was the fear of the ministry showing up and the last thing they wanted was a rehash of the Marge incident.

In fact, they so badly did not want a rehash of the Marge incident that Uncle Vernon turned a very violent shade of purple when he opened up the envelope and told Aunt Petunia through choked breaths that Marge was coming to visit in two weeks.  They all looked to Harry, clearly remembering what had happened the last time that Marge had come by.

"But she can't come here, Vernon.  She hates Harry.  You know that.  And now he's got us cornered into keeping that big-mouthed boyfriend of his staying here with us.  The shame of a homosexual couple living under our roof would be enough but that boy doesn't shut his mouth.  He told Piers all about their wretched school."

"Now you listen here, boy," said Uncle Vernon, slamming the letter down causing the water glasses on the table to shake.  He stared at Harry through slits for eyes.  "I can't do anything to stop Marge from coming.  When she is here you will be on your best behavior.  You will not act like you're a queer and you will not let Marge know what you are.  Do you understand?  I do not want a repeat performance of the last time Marge came to call."

"Yes, Uncle Vernon.  It was an accident last time."

"Who's this Marge and what happened last time?" said Draco.

"She's Uncle Vernon's sister and she's the one I inflated right before our third year started."

Draco started laughing.  "I heard about that.  I though for sure you were going to be expelled for that."

"I did, too, but I'm famous Harry Potter.  They can't expel me."

"Of course not.  That and they all thought that Sirius Black was trying to kill you."

"What do you mean by famous?" asked Dudley, screwing up his fat face.  "You aren't famous."

"In my world I am," said Harry, grinning.  Draco rolled his eyes.

"What would you ever be famous for?" said Uncle Vernon, a tone of disbelief in his voice.

"Because he's the Boy-Who-Lived," mocked Draco.  "He's the only one that ever survived the Dark Lord's attempt to kill him and he was just a baby.  Because he lives.  That's why.  He's famous for his mere continuing existence.  Just because he hasn't died yet."

"That's it?" said Dudley.  "I knew it would be something stupid."

"Actually, that's not true," said Harry.  "You were misinformed, Draco.  I'm not the only one that ever survived Voldemort's attempts to murder.  Need I remind you of a certain scar that lies on your own very forehead?"

Narrowing his eyes, Draco covered his scar with his hand.  Harry laughed.

Sitting in the living room with Draco and Dudley, one of Dudley's programs was on television and Draco was turning a flashlight over in his hands, turning it on and off.  Harry wanted to tell him that if he kept doing that while it was pointing in his eyes, he would end up as blind as Harry was, but thinking it would be funny to see Draco in glasses, Harry let him continue.

"Vernon," he could hear Aunt Petunia call as she walked to the kitchen.  "The light bulb from the porch light is missing.  You know how these neighborhood kids get.  Where are the replacements?"

Harry knew he shouldn't find it funny, but this was the third summer in a row that the Dursleys light bulbs were being stolen from the front porch.  He bet that their light bulbs at Christmas were still being stolen as well.  There were kids in the neighborhood that liked to make mischief, and stealing light bulbs was one of their favorite activities.  Harry wondered if the day would ever come when he told his aunt and uncle that Dudley was among the kids who caused all the trouble.

"Harry?"

"What is it, Draco?"

"Explain how this works.  It doesn't have a wire."

"There are batteries inside."

"Inside what?"

"The case.  It's a flashlight.  A battery makes the flashlight turn on."

"Show me," said Draco, handing the flashlight to Harry.  He unscrewed the top and handed Draco a battery.  "What do the batteries do?"

"The batteries store electricity."

"There's electricity in the battery?"

"Erm - yeah."

"Can I break one open?"

"What?"

"Can I break one open?"

"No, you can't break one open.  That stuff inside is toxic."

"Well it isn't like I'm going to eat it."

"No, Draco.  You can't break open the battery."

"But I want to see the electricity."

"You can't see electricity."

"But you just said there was electricity in the battery.  I want to see it."

"You're impossible, Draco."

Shoving the batteries back into the flashlight before Draco could try to break one open, Harry twisted the flashlight back together and handed it to Draco.  Harry sunk back into the couch, folding his arms and watching the television as Draco resumed turning the flashlight on and off.  He hoped that Draco's eyes would go bad.  Then they could both wear glasses and really be the ugly scar twins.  All Draco needed was a good hair dye job because Harry would never go that platinum.

"What's it called again?" asked Draco, staring at the strange device sitting before him.  Just over Harry's shoulder he could see the woman called Aunt Petunia replacing a light bulb in the lamp after the one that had been in there had disappeared.  Draco had spent a week at the Dursleys already and he found that a daily threatening of wand usage tended to keep them in order, especially for Dudley, who Draco was about to slaughter.  If Dudley insulted Harry one more time, Draco was going to give him back the pig's tail that he discovered was the origin of the fear of magic striking his bottom.

"A telephone, Draco.  Muggles use it to communicate.  You dial the number, hold up the receiver and when someone picks up, you talk into it."

"A telephone," Draco repeated at length.

"Exactly.  Now, you punch in these numbers."

"Where?"

Harry pointed to the keypad.  "There."

"Who, exactly, am I calling?" asked Draco as he pushed the buttons on the phone.

"Hermione."

"Granger?" he moaned.  "Why am I calling Granger?"

"Because her parents are muggles, she has a telephone number, and her family is home as far as I know."

"HELLO!" Draco shouted into the receiver as he held it in front of him.

"No, Draco, you have to put it to your ear like this."  Harry readjusted it for him.   "And don't shout."

"Hello?" said Draco.  "Hello?"

"Yes.  Hello.  Can I help you, young man?"

"Is - this - the - Grangers?"

"Yes, this is.  With whom would you like to speak?"

"Hermione," he said, making Hermione's name very long.  Draco noticed that Harry was trying not to laugh at him.

A soft chuckle was heard over the phone.  "Do you know Hermione from school?"

"Yes."

"Is this your first time using a telephone?"

Draco swallowed.  Was he really doing that badly?  "Yes."

"Just one moment," said the voice, and Draco could hear him calling, "Hermione!  One of your friends from school is on the phone.  He doesn't seem to understand the telephone very well so do try and go easy on him."

"Ron?" she asked, coming over the line.

"No."

"MALFOY?"

"Can - you - hear - me?"

"Malfoy, why did you call me?  Aren't you with - HARRY POTTER!"

"She just yelled your name, Harry."

Harry laughed.  "Talk to her."

Draco shrugged.  "Hello."

"Are you okay, Malfoy?"

"I'm - fine."

"You can talk normal."

"I - am."

"No - you - aren't."

"Oh. . .Sorry about that."

"Did Harry put you up to this?"

"He's teaching me to use the fellytone."

"Telephone," both Hermione and Harry corrected.

"Right.  Telephone."

"How is it going with the muggles?"

"The Dursleys don't like me or Harry very much but it's alright because I get them back for being mean to Harry by snogging him in front of them.  The man called Uncle Vernon greatly dislikes it when I show any affection toward Harry at all."

Hermione laughed.  "Just like a Slytherin.  So other than that, how are things?  You didn't kill anyone yet, did you?"

"No.  I saw this marvelous muggle invention called light bobs."

"Light bulbs," said Harry.

"Oh right.  Light bulbs.  And I watched a television show.  Harry wouldn't let me open the batteries."

"Open the batteries?" asked Hermione.

"I wanted to see the electricity."

From over the phone line, Draco could hear Hermione snickering.  "You wanted to see the electricity?"

"Yes, but Harry wouldn't let me.  And he keeps yelling at me when I ask him about the sticker stamps."

"They're just stamps, Draco."

"Oh right.  Sorry, Harry.   The stamps.  And I kept putting my food in the microwave to make it hotter but then it was too hot so I put it in the refrigerator to cool it down."

"Wow, Draco, that's. . .there are no words.  None.  Can I talk to Harry?"

"Um - Sure."  He shrugged, holding the phone receiver out to Harry.  "She wants to talk to you."

"Hello?"

"Harry?"

"Hermione."

"You made Malfoy call me."

"I was teaching him how to use the telephone."

"I heard," said Hermione.  "He actually wanted to break open the batteries to see the electricity?"

"Yeah, he did.  He asks how everything works, Hermione.  I feel like I'm dating a very big three-year-old."

"Awe, Harry.  I'm sure it will get better."

"I have no answers for him.  I don't care how the vacuum works just as long as it does, you know?  But Draco - he wants to know everything.  I wish you were here.  You always have answers."

"You should have known he was going to ask, Harry."

"Well I'm helping him to get along and that should be enough."

"It is."

"Look, Hermione, I better go.  Draco looks like he's getting restless."

"Okay, Harry," she said, laughing.  "Don't forget to write and tell us about everything."

"I will.  Bye."

"Bye."

He hung the receiver back up and turned to Draco.  "That went well."

"Did I do good?"

"You did wonderful."  Harry wrapped his arms around Draco, pulling their bodies flushed together.

"Dad, they're doing it again!" Dudley called from the doorway.

Draco scowled.  "Can't get a moment's peace with your boyfriend in this house.  I miss the Astronomy tower.  I miss the Transfiguration room.  I miss Dobby."

"Dobby," repeated Harry, pulling Draco toward the door and up the stairs.  "Dobby paid Privet Drive a little visit right before my second year.  Tried to keep me from going back to Hogwarts."

"The whole Chamber of Secrets ordeal."

"Yeah."

"You know, I didn't know  anything about what my father did in the second year."

"I know.  I have a small confession to make."

"What is it?"

"In our second year, Ron, Hermione, and I - well, okay, it was mostly Hermione - but we made Polyjuice Potion."

"You made Polyjuice Potion?  That's wicked hard to make.  How did you get the ingredients?"

"Hermione stole them from Snape."

"Whatever did you make Polyjuice Potion for?"

Harry bit his lip.  "We wanted to test our hypothesis that you were the one who opened the Chamber of Secrets."

"You thought it was me?  No one thought it was me.  Everyone thought it was you."

"Yeah.  We thought it was you so we, Ron and I, used the Polyjuice Potion to become Crabbe and Goyle."

"You didn't!"

"Yes we did."

"Ew – why would you want to do that?"

"Because you'd tell us you were the heir if we were Crabbe and Goyle."

"What about Granger?"

"She - er - That should be for her to tell.  Let's just say her hair wasn't a human hair and it was quite by accident."

Draco laughed.  "What?  Did Granger turn into some sort of half-animal she-devil?"

"Something like that."

"When was this?  What did you do?  Note how I'm willing to let this slide because I think it was ingenious."

"That and we thought it was you."

"Well. . .yeah."

"Well we didn't know the way to the Slytherin common room but you found us wandering around looking for it.  You led us back and then when we got in, you showed us an article about Ron's father getting fined by the ministry for the flying car.  I think you said your father sent it to you."

"I vaguely remember that.  That was you?"

"Yep."

"Well then, I must say I am impressed."

"Are you really?"

"Yes," said Draco, laying back on Harry's bed and pulling him down on top of him with a rough gesture.  "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Are we ever going to fuck?"

"What?"

"Are we ever going to fuck?"

"That was sentimental and eloquent after the 'I love you's."

"Well. . .Are we?"

"I suppose we will eventually.  Gods, Draco, nice way of putting it."

"Well I hate that corny 'make love' thing.  I know that's what it should be but I'd just feel so lame saying it."

"Whatever floats your boat."

"Can we have the sex talk?"

"The sex talk?"

"Yes.  Don't couples have sex talks before the act of sex occurs?  I thought they did."

"Sure.  We can have the sex talk."

"I just want you to know where I stand."

"Which is?"

"Well, we've been together for almost eight months now and you know I love you but I don't think I'm ready for it yet.  I've never. . .done. . .it before and - well - shit.  Let's not have the sex talk."

Harry laughed.  "I'm a virgin, too, Draco.  We already admitted to this.  You are too funny."

"I just don't think I'm ready."

"That's okay with me.  I'll be here when you are."

"Are you ready?"

"That's irrelevant.  Neither one of us is having sex as long as you aren't ready."

"You're ready.  Gods, you're ready and I'm making you wait."

"Relax, Draco.  I'll wait for you.  We still have a lot of time ahead of us."

"Okay. . .I still feel guilty."

"Don't."

"But I do."

"Draco."

"What?"

"Don't feel guilty."

Draco sighed.  "I can't help it, Harry."

"Well you had better try."

"I love you."

"You already said that."

"I'm just reminding you."

"I like to be reminded."  Harry grinned as Draco placed a soft kiss to his lips.

They lay together in Harry's bed without saying a word for the next few hours, time passing at what seemed like an accelerated speed until they were called down for dinner.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Er – time for my shameless plug.  I have a story up under my penname called 'Falling'.  It's rated R.  The pairings are Harry/Draco (eventually) and Ron/OC.  There's a lot of Draco, a lot of Harry, a lot of Ron, and a lot of Snape.  Er – so yeah.  Please go read.

Loved something?  Hated something?  Tell me in a REVIEW or email me at angeldlsm00@hotmail.com.