She sat at her window so solemnly. An image of a woman who had been
crying reflected back at her. Her tears were warm and stung her
cheeks. Rain gently pattered on the glass, and she was now leaning
forward with her forehead pressed to the glass. She sighed and looked
up and out to where the stars would be, but saw only dark clouds.
'we'll leave this place...'
It felt like nothing more than a memory now, and less of a reality.
She felt the pain start to rise again, and tried to hold everything
back, but she couln't help it. She moved her chair a little back from
the window, and tried to hold herself from falling out of it. She
was staring at the floor, and staring at her tears that mimicked
rain.
"Spike...." she whispered under her breath. "where are you?"
Back on the ship, it was the same thing day to day. Faye's constant
nagging, Eds yelling and screaming which ultimately annoyed them all,
and Jets, in spikes opinion, horrible food. The only one who really
seemed at all at ease was the dog, who had fallen aleep sometime
during the end credits of 'Big Shots'.
She was cool and quiet as she tried to sneak one of spikes last
cigarettes. She thought he was dozing, but she should have known
better.
"Gee Faye, you know you can just ask."
"psh, why bother, I would just get some smart ass remark from you."
"You would actually, more like a question though."
"what do you mean?"
"Oh just a simple one like, 'why cant you spend the money you always
snag from me and Jet to buy your own cigarettes?'. Honestly Faye,
where do you piss away all of our cash on?"
Faye turned from him and walked off with the unlit cig in her mouth,
making some remark about men as she walked out. Spike just tuned her out
as she walked off though, until he could no longer hear her
complaining.
By now he would have once again resorted to the same line he always
gave Jet about his feelings towards women, kids and pets, but this
time he stopped himself, and walked to his room and shut the door
behind him.
For a while he just layed in the dark, staring at the fan for a while.
His cigarette was lit and just dangling in the corner of his
mouth, when his thoughts suddenly turned to Julia.
For the blonde haired, blue eyed woman always haunted him. He
thought about the first time he met her at the pool hall, he
remembered her first glance and her first smile. He remembered
everything he possibly could about her, until he remembered Vicious.
Vicious.
An old friend. He couldn't help but wonder about him as well. Was
he still in the picture with Julia? Did Julia still walk arm-in-arm
with him in public? He wondered if Julia ever thought about him.
Like some beautiful ghost, Julia had came and went. The three years
that he had been away from her had seemed like they had taken so long.
He wanted to see her again. There was absoloutely nothing more that
he had desired. If he only knew where she was, he would have left
everything else behind. The bebop, Jet, and the rest of them.
He had no real emotional attatchment to any of them anyways, except
for Jet. The only one he had ever confided in.
He sighed a little. His second cigarette was now down to its filter
"Julia..." saying her name out loud for the first time in a while.
"where are you?"
The shower turned on, and spike stepped inside. He let the hot
water fall over him for a while until he woke himself from his
subconcious and remembered where he was and what he was doing.
He heard a knock on the door and told whoever it was that was there
to go away. It was Faye. Faye. The one he couldnt stand out of
everyone on the bebop. At least Ed was useful when it
came down to tracking down bounties on the computer, and at least
the dog was a sufficient food source if they were ever THAT hungry.
But Faye, what was she good for? She left and came back as she pleased,
and always took the remainding cash with her, and Spike and Jet were
both long tired of that.
"What is it Faye?" spike asked in a demanding tone.
"When are you getting out of the shower? its been an hour and a half already,
you should really give someone else a turn!"
'Had it really been an hour and a half?' he thought to himself.
When Julia was in his mind, he could think of nothing else, and time
just seemed so different.
"Well? are you almost finished?!" Faye yelled while practically
pounding on the door.
"Just wait a damn minute."Spike replied.
The door opened, and Spike stepped out with his towel around him.
Faye looked at him, and Spike read what was in her eyes. She hated
when he did that, cause he knew everything she felt, and would use
it against her. This time her eyes held desire, and Spike had realized
that. But today Spike didn't feel like torturing her. He felt too
tortured himself. He walked back into his room, threw on his boxers
and an old shirt. He was once again laying down. His door opened and
then shut behind whoever walked in.
"Get out Faye" he demanded. "I dont want your company."
"(Sigh), its me, not Faye." Jet responded.
He sat at the end of the bed, and lit himself a cigarette. This
troubled Spike, since this was the opposite of his partners actions.
"What is it Spike? why so meloncholy?" he asked.
"Ive been telling you for three years, and you still dont get it."
"Well, Its kind of hard when you dont give the full details, and
even those you break down into pieces."
"I dont feel like openeing up just now Jet. Thats not me, and you
know it."
"yeah, i know. It would just be nice if you told me certain things.
Its hard to understand you sometimes Spike, but that's how it is
with you all the time. I'm sure the only one that knew the real you,
the complete you was Julia-"
He stopped when he heard Spike's breathing take a different pace.
Everything in the room had even seemed to change when he uttered her name.
"I see." said Jet. "I respect that. I'll leave you to your thoughts."
The thing was that Spike did want to talk. Deep down he truly did,
but with Julia. He couldnt discuss her though, and if he was with her he
wouldn't need to. All he would need was to hear her voice and laugh,
and see the same warm smile that she always shown on him.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Sun up, well, metaphorically. The days seemed to gradually grow darker,
and in spikes mind, they seemed darker than that. The somber days
affected most of the group, except for Ed who was always some how
full of sugar, even when she didn't have any.
The days grew harsher and as annoying as the bounties they caught for
petty cash. Another run in with Spike and Faye didn't make things any better.
It was sundown again. The sun was fading quickly as the horizons of Mars turned
that same blue-greenish color. They had been grounded for a while while they
chased a bounty from Ganymede to mars that was worth only 20,000 woolongs.
Not much considering the cost of food and constant repairs that the ships needed.
They were still grounded, hoping for another bounty to come along so they could
get at least enough cash for gas to get them back into orbit.
They got word that there was a man wanted for petty theft, and skipping a few
court hearings. Not worth much, but enough to get them back in the air.
His name was Jenin Verille. His father was Vladimir Verille, another criminal.
The whole family was the same, except he was the remainder who hadn't been
captured.
Spike had strolled in the same mini-market that Jenin did after he saw him
walk in. He was buying a case of Bud-lite, and seemed like he didnt care if
anyone recognized him. He didnt even have any sunglasses on to try and
hide his profile. 'Was this a set up?', thought Spike, but soon doubted
that when he heard him talking to the clerk. He had horrible slang, and Spike
wondered how he even had the smarts to pull off a robbery, but remembered that he
only robbed another mini-market when a 17-year old girl was on the job.
He couldnt have been that tough, and didn't seem to put up much of
a fight when Spike confronted him. He threw a few kicks and wild
punches, but Spike couldnt help but only smile, even almost laugh as he diminished
Jenins poor attempts.
Spike reached around and held one of his arms behind his back, and forced
him to walk. If bieng a poor fighter wasnt the only thing about him, he wasnt
very strong either. It was their first lucky break in a long while, well
not moneywise, but at least there was no real annoying struggle.
The 30,000 was theirs, finally, and was contributed evenly among Spike and Jet only.
It was almost Midnight, and Spike was still up. His door opened, and this time
it was Faye that walked in. But Spike could care less. He felt that if he told
her to get out, that it would show that he cared enough about her to talk to her, and
if not, he was afraid that she would stay. So, he told her anyway.
"Get out Faye." he sad in a calm enough voice.
But of course she didn't leave. She actually got closer to him, which aggrivated
him beyond words.
"Did you hear what I said?" he asked in an annoyed tone.
Faye heard him, but she ignored his request. She inched herself closer to him,
and leaned down, and to his surprise, she began kissing him. He grabbed
her by the shoulders and pushed her back with force.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he asked.
To Faye he had sounded like he was smiling, but with the tiny amount of
starlight that shone in the room, she could see that he wasn't. He actually
had a look of confusion and disgust on his face.
"Well what do you see?" she responded.
"I see you getting off of me, and walking out that door, and not disturbing
me for the rest of the night." Spike replied in a straight tone.
" Faye, I know how you see me, perhaps not every detail, but I'm
telling you this. I dont, and will never see you in the same way.
Just get that through your head."
But Faye continued as if she she didn't hear him. Spike once again pushed her off.
"Faye, I dont like bieng forceful with women, and I dont want to hurt you, ok?
so just stop."
"why?" she asked, almost crying.
"why do you even have to ask." said spike, closing his eyes to her.
"oh, I see" said Faye. "Or is it because I'm not Jul-"
She stopped herself, and even only saying that small bit had woken Spike wide
awake again. He looked at her with conviction in his eyes. He had flames
in them. She could see them, and she felt that that was the stupidest thing she
had and could ever say. Spike leaned up only a milimeter from her face.
He kissed her as hard as he could, hurting her, so that this time it was
actually her that was pushing him away. She looked at him, and tried
to smile, as if that would have made up for her stupid mistake.
"Honestly Faye, I'd rather go looking for a hooker than sleep with you.
Heh, at least they're cleaner."
And Fayes phony smile diminished as quickly as she had made it.
She got off of him, almost falling to the floor, and walked back outside his
door. She closed it gently, and Spike could hear her footsteps fade.
He heard a ship leaving, and he knew it was her going off to gamble away
all their savings again.
"Hey, come back!where the hell do you think you're going off
to now!" is all that Spike could make out from Jet.
Spike walked back out. He couldn't sleep now. The woman had angered him,
and woke him up more than he wanted to be. He walked out to the couch.
Jet was there reading some book he had found. Spike plopped down on
the big yellow couch by him.
Jet felt something was wrong, and he was about to ask Spike what
it was, but he remembered what he asked of him. But then, Spike
started to tell Jet something.
"Julia." Spike said with a sigh. "Saying that name feels so strange.
Its been so damn long.I wonder why she still has to haunt me."
Jet remained quiet, but still listened as carefully as he could, after
all, he wasnt going to miss out on finding out something new about
his partner. But that was all Spike said, and had left Jet almost
dying for more. Spike got back up and began walking to his room again.
Jet let out more smoke with each puff. How badly he just wanted to
barge into Spikes room and just shake him awake and yell at him
'would you give me the straight story already?!', but he refrained from
doing so, for he knew Spike himself did not yet have full grasp of
of everything that was going on in his own life.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Morning. Jet was up, and so was Ed. She had been bouncing off the walls.
"Jet person, when will my pancakes be ready?" she asked in the same energetic
voice she always had.
"Patience is a virtue, Ed." Jet answered.
"Do we have the extra gooey syrup, Jet person?"
"sorry Ed, all we have is a little butter"
"Aww, but Ed wants syrup."
"We would all like some syrup Ed, but money is just a little tight right now."
He still didn't know why he tried to explain budgeting to a child, and he began
to grow very tired of her jumpy antics.
"Say, Ed....why dont you go wake up Spike." He suggested. and Ed took off
like a bullet towards Spikes room. If Jet had to deal with a person, it might
as well have been someone who he could talk to, and in return, understand, as
much as he never understood Spike.
Ed got to his door and knocked louldy.
"Lunkhead, lunkhead, Jet person said breakfast is ready!"
But no reply came. She peeped her head inside. Spike was still sleeping. Ed walked
over to the side of his bed. She sat down next to him and started to shake him.
It didnt work. She layed down next to him, watching him sleep. 'How can Spike
person sleep so much?' she thought to herself. Spike started to stretch. His
fingertips reached the top of Eds head. He moved his hands a little through her
hair, but woke up when she started to giggle.
"Ah! Ed! what the hell are you doing here?"
"Heehee, Jet said to wake you up"
Spike let out a groan.
"well next time Ed, just call for me. You're gettin' kind of creepy, kid."
She just smiled and bounced off out of the room. Spike dragged himself to
the kitchen and sat in his chair. He rubbed his eyes a little bit, as Jet put the
plate full of dry pancakes down in front of him.
crying reflected back at her. Her tears were warm and stung her
cheeks. Rain gently pattered on the glass, and she was now leaning
forward with her forehead pressed to the glass. She sighed and looked
up and out to where the stars would be, but saw only dark clouds.
'we'll leave this place...'
It felt like nothing more than a memory now, and less of a reality.
She felt the pain start to rise again, and tried to hold everything
back, but she couln't help it. She moved her chair a little back from
the window, and tried to hold herself from falling out of it. She
was staring at the floor, and staring at her tears that mimicked
rain.
"Spike...." she whispered under her breath. "where are you?"
Back on the ship, it was the same thing day to day. Faye's constant
nagging, Eds yelling and screaming which ultimately annoyed them all,
and Jets, in spikes opinion, horrible food. The only one who really
seemed at all at ease was the dog, who had fallen aleep sometime
during the end credits of 'Big Shots'.
She was cool and quiet as she tried to sneak one of spikes last
cigarettes. She thought he was dozing, but she should have known
better.
"Gee Faye, you know you can just ask."
"psh, why bother, I would just get some smart ass remark from you."
"You would actually, more like a question though."
"what do you mean?"
"Oh just a simple one like, 'why cant you spend the money you always
snag from me and Jet to buy your own cigarettes?'. Honestly Faye,
where do you piss away all of our cash on?"
Faye turned from him and walked off with the unlit cig in her mouth,
making some remark about men as she walked out. Spike just tuned her out
as she walked off though, until he could no longer hear her
complaining.
By now he would have once again resorted to the same line he always
gave Jet about his feelings towards women, kids and pets, but this
time he stopped himself, and walked to his room and shut the door
behind him.
For a while he just layed in the dark, staring at the fan for a while.
His cigarette was lit and just dangling in the corner of his
mouth, when his thoughts suddenly turned to Julia.
For the blonde haired, blue eyed woman always haunted him. He
thought about the first time he met her at the pool hall, he
remembered her first glance and her first smile. He remembered
everything he possibly could about her, until he remembered Vicious.
Vicious.
An old friend. He couldn't help but wonder about him as well. Was
he still in the picture with Julia? Did Julia still walk arm-in-arm
with him in public? He wondered if Julia ever thought about him.
Like some beautiful ghost, Julia had came and went. The three years
that he had been away from her had seemed like they had taken so long.
He wanted to see her again. There was absoloutely nothing more that
he had desired. If he only knew where she was, he would have left
everything else behind. The bebop, Jet, and the rest of them.
He had no real emotional attatchment to any of them anyways, except
for Jet. The only one he had ever confided in.
He sighed a little. His second cigarette was now down to its filter
"Julia..." saying her name out loud for the first time in a while.
"where are you?"
The shower turned on, and spike stepped inside. He let the hot
water fall over him for a while until he woke himself from his
subconcious and remembered where he was and what he was doing.
He heard a knock on the door and told whoever it was that was there
to go away. It was Faye. Faye. The one he couldnt stand out of
everyone on the bebop. At least Ed was useful when it
came down to tracking down bounties on the computer, and at least
the dog was a sufficient food source if they were ever THAT hungry.
But Faye, what was she good for? She left and came back as she pleased,
and always took the remainding cash with her, and Spike and Jet were
both long tired of that.
"What is it Faye?" spike asked in a demanding tone.
"When are you getting out of the shower? its been an hour and a half already,
you should really give someone else a turn!"
'Had it really been an hour and a half?' he thought to himself.
When Julia was in his mind, he could think of nothing else, and time
just seemed so different.
"Well? are you almost finished?!" Faye yelled while practically
pounding on the door.
"Just wait a damn minute."Spike replied.
The door opened, and Spike stepped out with his towel around him.
Faye looked at him, and Spike read what was in her eyes. She hated
when he did that, cause he knew everything she felt, and would use
it against her. This time her eyes held desire, and Spike had realized
that. But today Spike didn't feel like torturing her. He felt too
tortured himself. He walked back into his room, threw on his boxers
and an old shirt. He was once again laying down. His door opened and
then shut behind whoever walked in.
"Get out Faye" he demanded. "I dont want your company."
"(Sigh), its me, not Faye." Jet responded.
He sat at the end of the bed, and lit himself a cigarette. This
troubled Spike, since this was the opposite of his partners actions.
"What is it Spike? why so meloncholy?" he asked.
"Ive been telling you for three years, and you still dont get it."
"Well, Its kind of hard when you dont give the full details, and
even those you break down into pieces."
"I dont feel like openeing up just now Jet. Thats not me, and you
know it."
"yeah, i know. It would just be nice if you told me certain things.
Its hard to understand you sometimes Spike, but that's how it is
with you all the time. I'm sure the only one that knew the real you,
the complete you was Julia-"
He stopped when he heard Spike's breathing take a different pace.
Everything in the room had even seemed to change when he uttered her name.
"I see." said Jet. "I respect that. I'll leave you to your thoughts."
The thing was that Spike did want to talk. Deep down he truly did,
but with Julia. He couldnt discuss her though, and if he was with her he
wouldn't need to. All he would need was to hear her voice and laugh,
and see the same warm smile that she always shown on him.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Sun up, well, metaphorically. The days seemed to gradually grow darker,
and in spikes mind, they seemed darker than that. The somber days
affected most of the group, except for Ed who was always some how
full of sugar, even when she didn't have any.
The days grew harsher and as annoying as the bounties they caught for
petty cash. Another run in with Spike and Faye didn't make things any better.
It was sundown again. The sun was fading quickly as the horizons of Mars turned
that same blue-greenish color. They had been grounded for a while while they
chased a bounty from Ganymede to mars that was worth only 20,000 woolongs.
Not much considering the cost of food and constant repairs that the ships needed.
They were still grounded, hoping for another bounty to come along so they could
get at least enough cash for gas to get them back into orbit.
They got word that there was a man wanted for petty theft, and skipping a few
court hearings. Not worth much, but enough to get them back in the air.
His name was Jenin Verille. His father was Vladimir Verille, another criminal.
The whole family was the same, except he was the remainder who hadn't been
captured.
Spike had strolled in the same mini-market that Jenin did after he saw him
walk in. He was buying a case of Bud-lite, and seemed like he didnt care if
anyone recognized him. He didnt even have any sunglasses on to try and
hide his profile. 'Was this a set up?', thought Spike, but soon doubted
that when he heard him talking to the clerk. He had horrible slang, and Spike
wondered how he even had the smarts to pull off a robbery, but remembered that he
only robbed another mini-market when a 17-year old girl was on the job.
He couldnt have been that tough, and didn't seem to put up much of
a fight when Spike confronted him. He threw a few kicks and wild
punches, but Spike couldnt help but only smile, even almost laugh as he diminished
Jenins poor attempts.
Spike reached around and held one of his arms behind his back, and forced
him to walk. If bieng a poor fighter wasnt the only thing about him, he wasnt
very strong either. It was their first lucky break in a long while, well
not moneywise, but at least there was no real annoying struggle.
The 30,000 was theirs, finally, and was contributed evenly among Spike and Jet only.
It was almost Midnight, and Spike was still up. His door opened, and this time
it was Faye that walked in. But Spike could care less. He felt that if he told
her to get out, that it would show that he cared enough about her to talk to her, and
if not, he was afraid that she would stay. So, he told her anyway.
"Get out Faye." he sad in a calm enough voice.
But of course she didn't leave. She actually got closer to him, which aggrivated
him beyond words.
"Did you hear what I said?" he asked in an annoyed tone.
Faye heard him, but she ignored his request. She inched herself closer to him,
and leaned down, and to his surprise, she began kissing him. He grabbed
her by the shoulders and pushed her back with force.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he asked.
To Faye he had sounded like he was smiling, but with the tiny amount of
starlight that shone in the room, she could see that he wasn't. He actually
had a look of confusion and disgust on his face.
"Well what do you see?" she responded.
"I see you getting off of me, and walking out that door, and not disturbing
me for the rest of the night." Spike replied in a straight tone.
" Faye, I know how you see me, perhaps not every detail, but I'm
telling you this. I dont, and will never see you in the same way.
Just get that through your head."
But Faye continued as if she she didn't hear him. Spike once again pushed her off.
"Faye, I dont like bieng forceful with women, and I dont want to hurt you, ok?
so just stop."
"why?" she asked, almost crying.
"why do you even have to ask." said spike, closing his eyes to her.
"oh, I see" said Faye. "Or is it because I'm not Jul-"
She stopped herself, and even only saying that small bit had woken Spike wide
awake again. He looked at her with conviction in his eyes. He had flames
in them. She could see them, and she felt that that was the stupidest thing she
had and could ever say. Spike leaned up only a milimeter from her face.
He kissed her as hard as he could, hurting her, so that this time it was
actually her that was pushing him away. She looked at him, and tried
to smile, as if that would have made up for her stupid mistake.
"Honestly Faye, I'd rather go looking for a hooker than sleep with you.
Heh, at least they're cleaner."
And Fayes phony smile diminished as quickly as she had made it.
She got off of him, almost falling to the floor, and walked back outside his
door. She closed it gently, and Spike could hear her footsteps fade.
He heard a ship leaving, and he knew it was her going off to gamble away
all their savings again.
"Hey, come back!where the hell do you think you're going off
to now!" is all that Spike could make out from Jet.
Spike walked back out. He couldn't sleep now. The woman had angered him,
and woke him up more than he wanted to be. He walked out to the couch.
Jet was there reading some book he had found. Spike plopped down on
the big yellow couch by him.
Jet felt something was wrong, and he was about to ask Spike what
it was, but he remembered what he asked of him. But then, Spike
started to tell Jet something.
"Julia." Spike said with a sigh. "Saying that name feels so strange.
Its been so damn long.I wonder why she still has to haunt me."
Jet remained quiet, but still listened as carefully as he could, after
all, he wasnt going to miss out on finding out something new about
his partner. But that was all Spike said, and had left Jet almost
dying for more. Spike got back up and began walking to his room again.
Jet let out more smoke with each puff. How badly he just wanted to
barge into Spikes room and just shake him awake and yell at him
'would you give me the straight story already?!', but he refrained from
doing so, for he knew Spike himself did not yet have full grasp of
of everything that was going on in his own life.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Morning. Jet was up, and so was Ed. She had been bouncing off the walls.
"Jet person, when will my pancakes be ready?" she asked in the same energetic
voice she always had.
"Patience is a virtue, Ed." Jet answered.
"Do we have the extra gooey syrup, Jet person?"
"sorry Ed, all we have is a little butter"
"Aww, but Ed wants syrup."
"We would all like some syrup Ed, but money is just a little tight right now."
He still didn't know why he tried to explain budgeting to a child, and he began
to grow very tired of her jumpy antics.
"Say, Ed....why dont you go wake up Spike." He suggested. and Ed took off
like a bullet towards Spikes room. If Jet had to deal with a person, it might
as well have been someone who he could talk to, and in return, understand, as
much as he never understood Spike.
Ed got to his door and knocked louldy.
"Lunkhead, lunkhead, Jet person said breakfast is ready!"
But no reply came. She peeped her head inside. Spike was still sleeping. Ed walked
over to the side of his bed. She sat down next to him and started to shake him.
It didnt work. She layed down next to him, watching him sleep. 'How can Spike
person sleep so much?' she thought to herself. Spike started to stretch. His
fingertips reached the top of Eds head. He moved his hands a little through her
hair, but woke up when she started to giggle.
"Ah! Ed! what the hell are you doing here?"
"Heehee, Jet said to wake you up"
Spike let out a groan.
"well next time Ed, just call for me. You're gettin' kind of creepy, kid."
She just smiled and bounced off out of the room. Spike dragged himself to
the kitchen and sat in his chair. He rubbed his eyes a little bit, as Jet put the
plate full of dry pancakes down in front of him.