And now for I think and hope and pray, the last chapter! Except for the diary of Missy. And that's next all you lucky people! Squuuueeee! The fabness! The happiness! Mi friends have been dogging me over getting this done. Hi Guys! Two Towers, Two Towers, oh yeah, oh yeah. Squuuuuueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!! Am majorly blissed out! Went to a movie marathon on Boxing day and saw BOTH movies! One after the other! SSSQQQQQQQQQUUUUUUUEEEEEE!!!!!! Elijah Wood *drool* Orlando *drool* Viggy *drool* Dom *drool* Eomer *drool* Normal healthy female interest, okey dokey? Maybe a little unhealthy-verging-on-obsession but what can you do? I know some one who looks like Lij! But he's only fourteen. *pout* Oh well, my sis can have him. It's really cute, like actually. He calls her his elf chick, and she calls him her hobbit. Aaawww. She's gonna kill me now. Meh. Not if I kill her first! Oh, and she's just started writing on ff.net. With her first fic ever. *sniffs* Her author name is 'an alien from zorbia'. I think. Go and read my little sis's stories! Go now, or I'll set Missy on you! Mwwawahhhaahhaaa!
A month and a bit later....
"Ish? You here yet?" I drop my school bag and go looking for my boyfriend, Ishmael. It's just such the coolest name. And he's hot too!
"Hey, I'm in here." He's stuck in my family's fridge again.
"Don't you buy food?" I say, amused. He's 19, just starting Uni and has his own flat, sorta. He shares it with a cousin and a weird guy. Well, the cousin's weird too, but he comes from New Zealand so you have to make allowances. He's half sheep, after all. But for some reason, Ish is always in my fridge.
"No. But I actually came to see you. The food was just a bonus." He straightens up and smiles at me. Drool. The whole mary sue body thing is annoying at times, but I can live it. It was one of the funniest things ever when I turned up at school. It was like instant popularity, just add blonde and stir. Not that I've stopped being me. I just laughed in all their faces and told them to f*** off. I've never seen so many tonsils before. And the enraged screaming was also amusing. "How was school?"
"School was school was school. But some more guys hit on me, so you'll have to go talk to them." He growls and comes over and picks me up. He's very protective. It's nice, but also annoying at times. "Put me down Ish." He smells good. He carefully puts me down on the floor, then I walk up to my room, dragging my schoolbag along with me. I walk in the door and flick the radio on. I have found my tastes in music have switched from soft rock and ska to the top forty type of stuff. Weird side effects of a mary sue body. I even like Britney Speares, though I am working on this sad, sad effect of mary sueness.
I strip, throwing my school uniform on the floor and hunt in my wardrobe for clothes. I can wear all this stuff now! But I will never lower myself to the level that I wear peasant style clothing. Ever. I keep having these urges to buy the wretched things, but I manage to defeat it. There are some bad things to this whole mary sue thing, but with the help of good therapy, I will overcome. We wii-lll ovveerr-ccoooommmmmeeee! Keep that thought in mind Sandy, when you keep having urges to flick your hair and bat your eyelashes. Clothes, clothes, clothes. Then I feel arms around me and a warm mouth kissing my neck. "I hope to god that's you Ish, and whoever you are, get the f*** out of my bedroom. I'm trying to dress here!" He chuckles and licks my pulse point. "Go, out!" He sighs noisily then leaves the room. I chuckle and drag out my jeans and a top. I have only just started pulling up my jeans, when I feel a weirdness at my back. I turn and gape in astonishment as a small white mist begins to form over my bed. "AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" I shriek.
"Sandy! What's wrong?!" Ish comes barelling up the hallway. A hand holding a snarling Missy (WHAT?!) and covered in bleeding scratches extends from the middle of the circle.
*BIIIITTTTTTEEEEEE!!!!!! Let go let go let go! Gandalfhuman will die!* The hand drops Missy on my bed, and hurriedly withdraws into the white mists. Missy leaps for the hand but as she nears it, the mist fades out and Missy goes into my bookcase.
"Missy! My poor baby girl, what have they done to you?" I climb over the bed and pick her up.
*Sandyhuman! Finally, a human who knows her place. Thank Bastet for that.* Missy purrs in my arms. Ish is gaping in astonishment behind me.
"Um. I didn't tell you exactly how and why my cat disappeared, did I?" He shakes his head mutely. Missy starts to stare hungrily at him.
*New boyfriend? Mmmmmmm.*
I sit and stroke Missy, who arches her back in enjoyment. "Well, about a month ago, I was reading a book on my bed when I was transported to Middle Earth. This was because of Gandalf, who was stoned. Then he transported the entire Fellowship of the Ring, plus me, here. Remember, the Lord of the Rings movies? Have you read the books?"
"Yeah, but how am I expected to believe that this really happened?"
"You have just seen a cat appear from a glowing white mist. What other example do you need?" I huff angrily at his disbelieving expression. "Here, I have a little souviner that Aragorn gave me. I haven't been able to get it changed yet. I get up from the bed, draping Missy over my shoulder and dig around in my top desk drawer. "Here it is." I give him the gold Gondorian Noble. He turns it over in his hands and examines it sceptically.
"Mmhmm."
"You are a silly person who obviuosly doesn't beleive the evidence of his senses. What other proof do you need?" I ask, holding onto Missy who is vibrating strangely and tensing her leg muscles.
*Mmmmm, hungry. Wonder what he tastes like?* Missy stares at Ish fixedly. *No more elfs, no more Legolaself to bite. No more hobbitthingies either. Sadness.* Missy leaps off my lap and onto Ish, and bites him.
"HOLY FUCK!!!! GET THIS THING OFFA ME!!!" Ish screams and falls backwards. Missy sits on his chest and licks her lips.
*As good as Hobbit. Even as good as Mrfrodohobbit. MMMMmmMMMMMmmmm. Moremoremoremore!* Missy goes to bite him again, but I grab her off Ish.
"What the fuck is that thing?" Ish says as he scrambles to his feet.
*Wonder what his ankles taste like?*
"I told you, this is my cat, Missy. Oh, you lost your collar, baby girl." I fuss over her.
*For what we are about to receive, Bastet, make us truly thankful.* Missy escapes my arms and bites Ish again. On the ankle for variety. I grab her as he scrambles away. It's rather amusing, but not as amusing as watching Legolas cower. *Mmmmmm. Better.*
"Missy! Mine not yours! Mine!" I look deeply into her eyes to enforce the message. "No more biting." Ish stares at me disbelievingly.
*Alright. Well, maybe just on special occasions.* Missy looks penitenet.
"Good. We understand each other then. Don't worry, she's just a little possessive." I reassure Ish. He doesn't look reassured. "Christ." I notice that I am only half dressed. I grab a top and do up my jeans. "So are we going to that movie or not?" I grin and he nods slowly. "Coolies! Missy, be good." I slip on some shoes and grab my handbag. "We go?" He smiles and nods. We walk out the door together, as I give Missy one last reassuring pat. "Oh, wait a sec!" I rummage through my bag. "I got this for your birthday Missy, and I've had it on me ever since. Seeing as how you've lost your collar somewhere, it's a good present. There you go." I fasten a new collar around her neck. "You look gorgeous, Missy. See ya later, ok, baby?" Missy purrs and goes to look herself over in the mirror.
"You talk to that cat as though it could understand you." Ish says as we get in his car. I love this whole older boyfriend thing. Car, money, status, prestige. It's all round nice.
"She can." Ish just shrugs his shoulders as he starts the car. "Don't fight?"
"No fighting."
"What are we going to see?"
"Maybe the Twin Towers movie, I thought."
"Cool." I nod as we drive off. The actors don't look anything like the real thing, but hey. Lord of the Rings still rocks! I decide not to call his attention to the large dragon overhead, or the guy with the blond hair, pointy ears, bow and confused expression.
Finally, an ending! Hoorah! *cheers of jubliation* First fic ever ended. Thanks to all my reviewers, I love you all for sticking through the really long period when I wrote nothing. *sniffles* You're all so nice. And sweet. *cries* I love you all! Missy says hi. If I ever get more then fifty reviews, I'll consider writing a sequel. If you're really nice. But only if I get over fifty. Next up, the very private diaries of Missy. And if you haven't read the very private diaries of the Fellowship, you should do that now. Thanks to my sis and my friend who gave me the idea in the first place. And so on. See yas! Go read my other fics now!
A month and a bit later....
"Ish? You here yet?" I drop my school bag and go looking for my boyfriend, Ishmael. It's just such the coolest name. And he's hot too!
"Hey, I'm in here." He's stuck in my family's fridge again.
"Don't you buy food?" I say, amused. He's 19, just starting Uni and has his own flat, sorta. He shares it with a cousin and a weird guy. Well, the cousin's weird too, but he comes from New Zealand so you have to make allowances. He's half sheep, after all. But for some reason, Ish is always in my fridge.
"No. But I actually came to see you. The food was just a bonus." He straightens up and smiles at me. Drool. The whole mary sue body thing is annoying at times, but I can live it. It was one of the funniest things ever when I turned up at school. It was like instant popularity, just add blonde and stir. Not that I've stopped being me. I just laughed in all their faces and told them to f*** off. I've never seen so many tonsils before. And the enraged screaming was also amusing. "How was school?"
"School was school was school. But some more guys hit on me, so you'll have to go talk to them." He growls and comes over and picks me up. He's very protective. It's nice, but also annoying at times. "Put me down Ish." He smells good. He carefully puts me down on the floor, then I walk up to my room, dragging my schoolbag along with me. I walk in the door and flick the radio on. I have found my tastes in music have switched from soft rock and ska to the top forty type of stuff. Weird side effects of a mary sue body. I even like Britney Speares, though I am working on this sad, sad effect of mary sueness.
I strip, throwing my school uniform on the floor and hunt in my wardrobe for clothes. I can wear all this stuff now! But I will never lower myself to the level that I wear peasant style clothing. Ever. I keep having these urges to buy the wretched things, but I manage to defeat it. There are some bad things to this whole mary sue thing, but with the help of good therapy, I will overcome. We wii-lll ovveerr-ccoooommmmmeeee! Keep that thought in mind Sandy, when you keep having urges to flick your hair and bat your eyelashes. Clothes, clothes, clothes. Then I feel arms around me and a warm mouth kissing my neck. "I hope to god that's you Ish, and whoever you are, get the f*** out of my bedroom. I'm trying to dress here!" He chuckles and licks my pulse point. "Go, out!" He sighs noisily then leaves the room. I chuckle and drag out my jeans and a top. I have only just started pulling up my jeans, when I feel a weirdness at my back. I turn and gape in astonishment as a small white mist begins to form over my bed. "AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" I shriek.
"Sandy! What's wrong?!" Ish comes barelling up the hallway. A hand holding a snarling Missy (WHAT?!) and covered in bleeding scratches extends from the middle of the circle.
*BIIIITTTTTTEEEEEE!!!!!! Let go let go let go! Gandalfhuman will die!* The hand drops Missy on my bed, and hurriedly withdraws into the white mists. Missy leaps for the hand but as she nears it, the mist fades out and Missy goes into my bookcase.
"Missy! My poor baby girl, what have they done to you?" I climb over the bed and pick her up.
*Sandyhuman! Finally, a human who knows her place. Thank Bastet for that.* Missy purrs in my arms. Ish is gaping in astonishment behind me.
"Um. I didn't tell you exactly how and why my cat disappeared, did I?" He shakes his head mutely. Missy starts to stare hungrily at him.
*New boyfriend? Mmmmmmm.*
I sit and stroke Missy, who arches her back in enjoyment. "Well, about a month ago, I was reading a book on my bed when I was transported to Middle Earth. This was because of Gandalf, who was stoned. Then he transported the entire Fellowship of the Ring, plus me, here. Remember, the Lord of the Rings movies? Have you read the books?"
"Yeah, but how am I expected to believe that this really happened?"
"You have just seen a cat appear from a glowing white mist. What other example do you need?" I huff angrily at his disbelieving expression. "Here, I have a little souviner that Aragorn gave me. I haven't been able to get it changed yet. I get up from the bed, draping Missy over my shoulder and dig around in my top desk drawer. "Here it is." I give him the gold Gondorian Noble. He turns it over in his hands and examines it sceptically.
"Mmhmm."
"You are a silly person who obviuosly doesn't beleive the evidence of his senses. What other proof do you need?" I ask, holding onto Missy who is vibrating strangely and tensing her leg muscles.
*Mmmmm, hungry. Wonder what he tastes like?* Missy stares at Ish fixedly. *No more elfs, no more Legolaself to bite. No more hobbitthingies either. Sadness.* Missy leaps off my lap and onto Ish, and bites him.
"HOLY FUCK!!!! GET THIS THING OFFA ME!!!" Ish screams and falls backwards. Missy sits on his chest and licks her lips.
*As good as Hobbit. Even as good as Mrfrodohobbit. MMMMmmMMMMMmmmm. Moremoremoremore!* Missy goes to bite him again, but I grab her off Ish.
"What the fuck is that thing?" Ish says as he scrambles to his feet.
*Wonder what his ankles taste like?*
"I told you, this is my cat, Missy. Oh, you lost your collar, baby girl." I fuss over her.
*For what we are about to receive, Bastet, make us truly thankful.* Missy escapes my arms and bites Ish again. On the ankle for variety. I grab her as he scrambles away. It's rather amusing, but not as amusing as watching Legolas cower. *Mmmmmm. Better.*
"Missy! Mine not yours! Mine!" I look deeply into her eyes to enforce the message. "No more biting." Ish stares at me disbelievingly.
*Alright. Well, maybe just on special occasions.* Missy looks penitenet.
"Good. We understand each other then. Don't worry, she's just a little possessive." I reassure Ish. He doesn't look reassured. "Christ." I notice that I am only half dressed. I grab a top and do up my jeans. "So are we going to that movie or not?" I grin and he nods slowly. "Coolies! Missy, be good." I slip on some shoes and grab my handbag. "We go?" He smiles and nods. We walk out the door together, as I give Missy one last reassuring pat. "Oh, wait a sec!" I rummage through my bag. "I got this for your birthday Missy, and I've had it on me ever since. Seeing as how you've lost your collar somewhere, it's a good present. There you go." I fasten a new collar around her neck. "You look gorgeous, Missy. See ya later, ok, baby?" Missy purrs and goes to look herself over in the mirror.
"You talk to that cat as though it could understand you." Ish says as we get in his car. I love this whole older boyfriend thing. Car, money, status, prestige. It's all round nice.
"She can." Ish just shrugs his shoulders as he starts the car. "Don't fight?"
"No fighting."
"What are we going to see?"
"Maybe the Twin Towers movie, I thought."
"Cool." I nod as we drive off. The actors don't look anything like the real thing, but hey. Lord of the Rings still rocks! I decide not to call his attention to the large dragon overhead, or the guy with the blond hair, pointy ears, bow and confused expression.
Finally, an ending! Hoorah! *cheers of jubliation* First fic ever ended. Thanks to all my reviewers, I love you all for sticking through the really long period when I wrote nothing. *sniffles* You're all so nice. And sweet. *cries* I love you all! Missy says hi. If I ever get more then fifty reviews, I'll consider writing a sequel. If you're really nice. But only if I get over fifty. Next up, the very private diaries of Missy. And if you haven't read the very private diaries of the Fellowship, you should do that now. Thanks to my sis and my friend who gave me the idea in the first place. And so on. See yas! Go read my other fics now!