Commercials End, Show Resumes
Scene 1, Jerry's Apartment:
Jerry is making a sandwich; George is sitting on the couch reading a magazine.
Jerry:
So George, are you up for going to "Titanic" today with Linda and me? You
can bring Susan! George (still looking at magazine):
Nah, I can't.
Jerry:
Why not? I heard from Kramer you see Kate's breasts completely!
George (now looking at Jerry in the eye, Jerry is taking a bite from sandwich): And you want me to bring Susan to that?
Jerry:
All right man, you don't have to.
Kramer Enters
Kramer (chuckles):
Guess what I bought?
Jerry:
Another inflatable love doll?
Kramer:
Nah, even better!
Jerry (looking impressed):
There's something BETTER than a love doll?
Kramer:
Giddy-Up!
Jerry:
What?
Kramer:
A brand new computer!
Jerry (looking slightly less impressed): Ah. (turns around)
Kramer:
Wait, wh- aren't you excited?
Jerry:
No.
Kramer:
Fine. What time is it?
Jerry (looking at his watch):
3:18, why?
Kramer:
Ah, got to go. I am 3 minutes late for my appointment.
Jerry:
An appointment? With who?
Kramer:
PrettyLady360.
Jerry:
Ah.
Kramer Leaves
Jerry (to George):
There goes another victim of modern technology.
George:
When do you think this computer thing will stop?
Jerry (looking up, talking certainly):
I'll give it a few millenniums.
(George smiles)
Scene 2, Coffee House:
Elaine is sitting, looking depressed.
Waitress:
Here's your check, which would be 5.78. Walks Away
Elaine:
Wait! Waitress Turns Around
Elaine:
5.78 for a cup of tea? It's not like this tea flavor is extinct or something.
Waitress:
It's 5.78, if you think it's too expensive then that's your problem. Whispering You should've thought about that before ordering.
Walks Away
Elaine:
Mouthing Bitch.
Jerry and George walk in
Jerry:
Hey Elaine.
George:
Hello Elaine.
Elaine (flatly):
Hey.
George:
How'd your date with Jason work out?
Elaine Blows Raspberry
George:
I see.
Jerry:
Why? What happened?
Elaine:
He picked me up twenty minutes late. Then we went to see "Cats", he had to
take three bathroom brakes. Jerry (sarcastically):
That's terrible.
Elaine:
I know, and wait until you hear this, when we went back to his house for
dinner, guess what he makes? Jerry and George look at each other absentmindedly
Elaine:
Spaghetti-O's! From a can!
Jerry:
Oh! Spaghetti-O's from a can! I thought Spaghetti-O's from a tree!
Elaine looks at Jerry with a forced smile
Scene 3, Kramer's Apartment:
Kramer is on the computer.
Kramer (while typing): I-am-twen-ty-two, and-from-Mali-bu.
Kramer Waits for Response
Kramer: Oh, you live in Malibu too, huh?
Kramer (while typing): I'll-be-back-in-a-mo-ment, I-got-to-go-to-the-lit- tle-
boys'-room. Gets up, girl responds
Kramer (yelling at computer): What do you mean "be back ass-up"? Don't
you call me an "ass-up!". Leaves to the Bathroom
Zoom on Computer Screen, Computer says: "Be Back ASAP!"
Commercial Break
(ASAP=As Soon As Possible)
Scene 1, Jerry's Apartment:
Jerry is making a sandwich; George is sitting on the couch reading a magazine.
Jerry:
So George, are you up for going to "Titanic" today with Linda and me? You
can bring Susan! George (still looking at magazine):
Nah, I can't.
Jerry:
Why not? I heard from Kramer you see Kate's breasts completely!
George (now looking at Jerry in the eye, Jerry is taking a bite from sandwich): And you want me to bring Susan to that?
Jerry:
All right man, you don't have to.
Kramer Enters
Kramer (chuckles):
Guess what I bought?
Jerry:
Another inflatable love doll?
Kramer:
Nah, even better!
Jerry (looking impressed):
There's something BETTER than a love doll?
Kramer:
Giddy-Up!
Jerry:
What?
Kramer:
A brand new computer!
Jerry (looking slightly less impressed): Ah. (turns around)
Kramer:
Wait, wh- aren't you excited?
Jerry:
No.
Kramer:
Fine. What time is it?
Jerry (looking at his watch):
3:18, why?
Kramer:
Ah, got to go. I am 3 minutes late for my appointment.
Jerry:
An appointment? With who?
Kramer:
PrettyLady360.
Jerry:
Ah.
Kramer Leaves
Jerry (to George):
There goes another victim of modern technology.
George:
When do you think this computer thing will stop?
Jerry (looking up, talking certainly):
I'll give it a few millenniums.
(George smiles)
Scene 2, Coffee House:
Elaine is sitting, looking depressed.
Waitress:
Here's your check, which would be 5.78. Walks Away
Elaine:
Wait! Waitress Turns Around
Elaine:
5.78 for a cup of tea? It's not like this tea flavor is extinct or something.
Waitress:
It's 5.78, if you think it's too expensive then that's your problem. Whispering You should've thought about that before ordering.
Walks Away
Elaine:
Mouthing Bitch.
Jerry and George walk in
Jerry:
Hey Elaine.
George:
Hello Elaine.
Elaine (flatly):
Hey.
George:
How'd your date with Jason work out?
Elaine Blows Raspberry
George:
I see.
Jerry:
Why? What happened?
Elaine:
He picked me up twenty minutes late. Then we went to see "Cats", he had to
take three bathroom brakes. Jerry (sarcastically):
That's terrible.
Elaine:
I know, and wait until you hear this, when we went back to his house for
dinner, guess what he makes? Jerry and George look at each other absentmindedly
Elaine:
Spaghetti-O's! From a can!
Jerry:
Oh! Spaghetti-O's from a can! I thought Spaghetti-O's from a tree!
Elaine looks at Jerry with a forced smile
Scene 3, Kramer's Apartment:
Kramer is on the computer.
Kramer (while typing): I-am-twen-ty-two, and-from-Mali-bu.
Kramer Waits for Response
Kramer: Oh, you live in Malibu too, huh?
Kramer (while typing): I'll-be-back-in-a-mo-ment, I-got-to-go-to-the-lit- tle-
boys'-room. Gets up, girl responds
Kramer (yelling at computer): What do you mean "be back ass-up"? Don't
you call me an "ass-up!". Leaves to the Bathroom
Zoom on Computer Screen, Computer says: "Be Back ASAP!"
Commercial Break
(ASAP=As Soon As Possible)