Commercials End, Show Resumes
Scene 4:
Jerry and Linda are making out in the movie theatre.
Leonardo Dicaprio:
I'm the king of the world!
Jerry (while kissing, muffled):
I'm the king of kissing.
Newman in the background, looking envious
Jerry and Linda still kissing
--Movie Ends, Jerry, Linda and Newman Walk Into Each Other Outside.
Jerry:
Hel-lo Newman.
Newman (look of jealousy on his face):
Good evening Jerry, what did you think of the movie?
Jerry (startled):
It was great, smiles to Linda especially from the angle I was in.
Newman:
Well, they say the 7th row is the best.
Jerry (annoyed):
Cool.
Newman:
But Three Hours, don't you think it was a bit. Long.?
Jerry:
No.
Newman Shakes Head In Disgust
Scene 5:
Elaine and Jason Sitting on a Porch step
Elaine:
Thanks again for the fabulous Chef Boyardee dinner.
Jason (smiling):
Well, I'm glad you liked it.
Elaine:
Yeah, um. Listen, thank you so much for asking me on another date, I am really-
Jason (interrupting):
Elaine, I'm sorry, can you hold on a second. I got to go to the bathroom. I'm sorry, it'll be quick.
Elaine Looking Astonished
Jason (whispering):
It'll take a minute, it's a number one.
Elaine (nodding, eyes wide open):
Door Shuts, Elaine Runs
Scene 6:
Jerry's Apartment, Jerry is Talking on the Phone
Jerry:
Okay, okay, so- Writes Down Queens' Rib Palace, Saturday, 7:30. Puts Note on Refrigerator I'll be there. Thanks, bye. Hangs Up.
Knock
Jerry Opens, Sees Elaine
Elaine:
You won't believe what happened.
Jerry (sarcastically):
Mr. Canned Food and you broke up.?
Elaine:
Sort of. He served me Chef Boyardee!
Jerry:
Which kind?
Elaine:
I don't know! Does it matter?
Jerry Nods
Elaine:
Um, I think "Overstuffed Ravioli".
Jerry (shrinks face):
Eww, I mean, the Lasagna is okay, but the Ravioli?
Elaine (as-a-matter-of-fact tone):
OVERSTUFFED Ravioli.
Kramer Enters
Jerry:
Kramer! How's what's her name-
Kramer:
PrettyWoman360?
Jerry:
Yeah, what did you say she called you?
Kramer:
Ass-up?
Elaine:
How did she spell it?
Kramer:
Oh yeah, that's another thing, she can't spell for crap!
Elaine (stubbornly):
How did she write it?!?
Kramer:
Woah! Easy there Elaine! She wrote it A-S-A-P!
Elaine:
Kramer! That means As-Soon-As-Possible!
Kramer:
Oh. That explains a lot. Well, she barbs too much!
Jerry:
What's barb?
Kramer:
You know, barb. To insult.
Elaine:
Did she insult YOU?
Kramer:
No, but she keeps saying it. She can't spell that either, she writes it B-R- B and then she leaves for like a minute or two.
Elaine:
Kramer! That means Be-Right-Back!
Kramer (hangs head in shame):
Oh.
Jerry:
Elaine, how come you know so much about these "Internet Signs"?
Elaine:
Um. I chat once in a while.
Jerry:
Did you meet anybody nice?
Elaine:
I thought I did.
Jerry:
Who?
Elaine (bites lip):
Elaine Coughs
Mr. Canned Food.
Jerry Laughs
Kramer:
Well, my woman told me she likes Chinese food. I got no problem with that.
Jerry:
Was that before or after you told her you lived in China for three years?
Kramer (angry):
HEY! I only said two-and-a-half!
Jerry (sarcastically):
Oh! My bad.
Jerry:
Do you have a picture of her?
Kramer:
Yeah, I printed it from the computer. Look.
Kramer takes out Picture, Jerry and Elaine look
Kramer:
What do you think? Isn't she something?
Elaine and Jerry look at Kramer
Kramer:
She should be a- a- a model. Or a- a TV star or something.
Jerry:
She is.
Kramer:
What? What do you mean?
Jerry:
That's a picture of Yasmine Bleeth. From BAYWATCH.
Kramer Flabbergasted
Commercial Break
Scene 4:
Jerry and Linda are making out in the movie theatre.
Leonardo Dicaprio:
I'm the king of the world!
Jerry (while kissing, muffled):
I'm the king of kissing.
Newman in the background, looking envious
Jerry and Linda still kissing
--Movie Ends, Jerry, Linda and Newman Walk Into Each Other Outside.
Jerry:
Hel-lo Newman.
Newman (look of jealousy on his face):
Good evening Jerry, what did you think of the movie?
Jerry (startled):
It was great, smiles to Linda especially from the angle I was in.
Newman:
Well, they say the 7th row is the best.
Jerry (annoyed):
Cool.
Newman:
But Three Hours, don't you think it was a bit. Long.?
Jerry:
No.
Newman Shakes Head In Disgust
Scene 5:
Elaine and Jason Sitting on a Porch step
Elaine:
Thanks again for the fabulous Chef Boyardee dinner.
Jason (smiling):
Well, I'm glad you liked it.
Elaine:
Yeah, um. Listen, thank you so much for asking me on another date, I am really-
Jason (interrupting):
Elaine, I'm sorry, can you hold on a second. I got to go to the bathroom. I'm sorry, it'll be quick.
Elaine Looking Astonished
Jason (whispering):
It'll take a minute, it's a number one.
Elaine (nodding, eyes wide open):
Door Shuts, Elaine Runs
Scene 6:
Jerry's Apartment, Jerry is Talking on the Phone
Jerry:
Okay, okay, so- Writes Down Queens' Rib Palace, Saturday, 7:30. Puts Note on Refrigerator I'll be there. Thanks, bye. Hangs Up.
Knock
Jerry Opens, Sees Elaine
Elaine:
You won't believe what happened.
Jerry (sarcastically):
Mr. Canned Food and you broke up.?
Elaine:
Sort of. He served me Chef Boyardee!
Jerry:
Which kind?
Elaine:
I don't know! Does it matter?
Jerry Nods
Elaine:
Um, I think "Overstuffed Ravioli".
Jerry (shrinks face):
Eww, I mean, the Lasagna is okay, but the Ravioli?
Elaine (as-a-matter-of-fact tone):
OVERSTUFFED Ravioli.
Kramer Enters
Jerry:
Kramer! How's what's her name-
Kramer:
PrettyWoman360?
Jerry:
Yeah, what did you say she called you?
Kramer:
Ass-up?
Elaine:
How did she spell it?
Kramer:
Oh yeah, that's another thing, she can't spell for crap!
Elaine (stubbornly):
How did she write it?!?
Kramer:
Woah! Easy there Elaine! She wrote it A-S-A-P!
Elaine:
Kramer! That means As-Soon-As-Possible!
Kramer:
Oh. That explains a lot. Well, she barbs too much!
Jerry:
What's barb?
Kramer:
You know, barb. To insult.
Elaine:
Did she insult YOU?
Kramer:
No, but she keeps saying it. She can't spell that either, she writes it B-R- B and then she leaves for like a minute or two.
Elaine:
Kramer! That means Be-Right-Back!
Kramer (hangs head in shame):
Oh.
Jerry:
Elaine, how come you know so much about these "Internet Signs"?
Elaine:
Um. I chat once in a while.
Jerry:
Did you meet anybody nice?
Elaine:
I thought I did.
Jerry:
Who?
Elaine (bites lip):
Elaine Coughs
Mr. Canned Food.
Jerry Laughs
Kramer:
Well, my woman told me she likes Chinese food. I got no problem with that.
Jerry:
Was that before or after you told her you lived in China for three years?
Kramer (angry):
HEY! I only said two-and-a-half!
Jerry (sarcastically):
Oh! My bad.
Jerry:
Do you have a picture of her?
Kramer:
Yeah, I printed it from the computer. Look.
Kramer takes out Picture, Jerry and Elaine look
Kramer:
What do you think? Isn't she something?
Elaine and Jerry look at Kramer
Kramer:
She should be a- a- a model. Or a- a TV star or something.
Jerry:
She is.
Kramer:
What? What do you mean?
Jerry:
That's a picture of Yasmine Bleeth. From BAYWATCH.
Kramer Flabbergasted
Commercial Break