Chapter 3 – Failure
Yeah… you have a good point there, Shootin'star. (Welcome back, yay yay yay!) I've been trying to find a solution for the problem… otherwise I would have obstacles galore for this one… and the next. Okay, how about this… if I write a Q in the middle of the divider, it would represent Quisty's point of view, and S if it would be Seifer's. If there's nothing… it would be those general stuff like author's notes. Of course, I would try to keep it clear-cut by not swapping back and forth with only a few lines in between… bear with me for a while as I get used to it myself. Damn… first person perspective is so difficult for me… I used to do only third person-cum-narrator types… thanks for your reviews, you good people! Keep them coming!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*S*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I've always disliked The Blonde Instructor. I knew that for a very long time already. But now I'm undeniably sure about it.
First, she has to insult me by wishing me luck. Even after I had said to save those words for bad students who need it. And she said it deliberately to humiliate me in front of my Squad. Is that the way an Instructor is supposed to act? In what kind of light would my Squad members look at me if I allowed myself to be made fun of like that? It undermines my authority as a Squad Captain, and as the Head of the Disciplinary Committee as well. I'll make sure she gets her due penalties for that.
To further inflame the irritation I had felt towards her, she had to stop the exchange between yours truly and that immature Chicken-wuss. That hyperactive overgrown kid hadn't completely left his pacifier-sucking days from the looks of him… I couldn't resist making a jibe at him, which was precisely what I was trying to do, teach him a lesson so that he wouldn't continue to distracting people with his incessant fly-swatting moves and on-the-spot jogging. But no… she wouldn't let me have a go at him. She just has to interfere in everything I do, doesn't she?
What's wrong with her?
Not only her. This whole Garden sucks.
They failed me. Yet again. Saying that I have disrespect… or was it disregard… for orders.
I concede; orders are necessary for a mission to run smoothly. Without them, everyone would be in doubt of what they should be in charge of, and this would have lead to failure.
But when the orders themselves were questionable, shouldn't a future SeeD take the initiative to override them and aim for the better result?
Did they stop to think about the contribution I had made towards destroying the enemy's units? Heck, if I had obediently stayed at Central Square, waiting for the call to retreat, we wouldn't have found out about that robotic monstrosity known as the Black Widow… and it most certainly would have harmed more of our client's soldiers.
Did they take that into consideration? No. All they did was focus upon my violation of the orders.
I hate them.
**********S**********
My only consolation in the whole mess is Rinoa. Such a sweet, delightful girl. I've never met anyone quite like her before. She was the only one who understood me, looked beneath the surface and saw something good apart from the arrogant exterior.
I will do everything to help her achieve her quest for Timber's Independence. I know how important this was to her, and I was flattered that she had asked for my help.
But things did not turn out as smoothly as I had wanted them to be. I did not qualify for SeeDship and eventually, the mission of aiding the Forest Owls of Timber, of which Rinoa was the leader, fell into the hands of Leonhart and his Squad. I have no objections as to Leonhart being in charge of it… as I have stated before my appreciation of his abilities. But Chicken-wuss? And that Messenger Girl? I wouldn't trust them to look after the flower patch in Balamb Garden!
Pssshaw… who am I kidding? I want to take over the mission myself… but regretfully I wasn't qualified enough.
Today, the President of Galbadia, Vinzer Deling was slated to make an announcement over the airwaves.
Some naïve fools had thought that it would be a declaration of Timber's independence… but I am not optimistic about the possibility of that happening. That old fart wouldn't be so kind.
Sure enough, he announces Sorceress Edea to be the Peace Ambassador.
Is he outta his mind?
I may have a thing for Sorceresses. In fact, it is my lifelong dream to be able to protect one if I should be so fortunate to be accepted as her Knight.
But this Sorceress Edea virtually radiates eerily black waves from within… you could see that she wasn't exactly a saint just from the way she glides, and the way she looked at people as if they were lowly beings. She gives off too evil a feeling to be a Peace Ambassador!
I hold Vinzer Deling captive before his announcement was over… I couldn't stand the thought of Rinoa's plans being marred so easily… I had to do something!
I was rash. I admit it. But damn if I was going to let our plans slip away like that!
The Sorceress approaches me. A heart-stopping fear renders my body immobilized.
Instructor Trepe grabs her head in pain and collapsed onto the ground.
The raven-haired one advances slowly towards me, goading and seducing at the same time, using the word Boy over and over again.
"I'm not a boy!" I kept shouting back.
But I was too weak, and I let something else take over the control of my mind and body.
I need someone to reach out and pull me back up.
No one knows of my plight… so naturally, no hand was there to lend its support.
Raijin and Fujin still follow me around, but they're becoming more and more distant as they're forced to fight against their former comrades.
Disappointment and despair were ever present in their eyes, the same things that I'm feeling at myself.
At last, they abandon me, and rightly so.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*S^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
The final battle. I am facing Chicken-wuss, Puberty-Boy, and the Blonde Instructor.
I do not actually like insulting them, but it was just a way of protecting myself.
I put on a complicated mask made from a mixture of arrogance, rudeness and faked self-confidence that I wished I possessed but could only muster an appearance of. It has fooled many till this day, but I wonder if this is really what I want to do… deceiving others and myself with a personality that wasn't the least bit true. What was I to do then, tell me? Are you saying that I should let people break through it, and find a vulnerable coward shivering inside? I'd rather not, thank you very much.
I see that they've all grown stronger… even Dintch. But it is Leonhart who especially catches my eye. There was something different about him since we last met face to face… it is none of my business to know what it was, and I do not care to learn.
But I'm no easy fight myself
I dole out my Blood Fest, aiming at Leonhart, then Dintch.
Why did I not attack Trepe? I'm not exactly clear on that myself.
But three against one isn't a fair fight. They would heal within two turns of taking my attacks, whereas I had to choose with caution if I wanted to attack or heal my wounds.
And who would have thought that my own GF would betray me?
Gilgamesh had abandoned me too, along with everyone else.
I was born a loner, and will die as one. So what's the difference anyway?
Or so I thought.
"You will never defeat her…" I muttered as they went off in search of Sorceress Adel. But some part of me wishes they would, so that I could get my control back.
The manipulative force takes over my body again, holding Rinoa captive and handing her over to the Sorceress. When will she stop tormenting me like this? This shell wears my smirk, uses my Hyperion.
You f**cking impostor! I wanted to shout at it. I know it's crude to swear like that… but I was driven way past my limits of tolerance with the one who treated me like a puppet, to be pulled and yanked by the strings whichever way she wanted.
But it is finally over now.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^S^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I look up at the Garden with a colour that matched the clear sky, as it hovered by and covered part of the sun that had been beaming its warm rays all over that part of the world. A huge shadow covered the immediate area, due to the largeness of the mobile Garden. Cracking a small smile, I wished the best for its cadets and SeeDs alike, especially those six that I have battled closely against.
They used to be my enemies, but I have only admiration and respect for them now.
No longer do I blame anyone for my own failure to qualify as a SeeD. I realise how immature it was of me to think in that way before. I really needed to assess myself with a more critical eye.
This realisation paves the way to my story. Or rather, Our Story.
If you still have the interest, hear me out.
************************************************************************************
WL: Okay then, that was the story as we knew of it, from Seifer's view. I may have skipped over a lot of the stuff that actually happened in the game… but I didn't want to dwell too much on it since the relationship between Quisty and Seifer only actually improved after all of it was over.
Celestine: Just admit that you can't remember the details.
WL: Okay, the truth is I can't remember the details.
Celestine: Huh? She actually agreed with me?
WL: Do you guys think that I was stupid to level up to 20 as soon as Squall and company returned from the Dollet Mission, on their way back to the Garden? But I couldn't resist learning all the Vit-J, Element Attack, Element Defense, Status Defense X 2 abilities… and then came the lure of drawing 100 Firas, Blizzaras and who knows what else Mid-Level Magic for each and every person… say I'm stupid… I need to hear it. No wonder my own research takes so long… at the rate I'm going, this fic would be finished before I can get past the first battle with Edea… a.k.a Disc 1. *Moan*
Celestine: Am I being ignored here?
WL: Huh? Did someone say something? Remember to Read and Review, thanks people!