I just added the response to reviews, so if you think you've read this chap, you probably have ^^
Disclaimer: I do not own anything in the Harry Potter-verse, even the apprenticeship thing isn't mine; I first read it in The Sorcerer's Apprentice by Jacquez. The story is really good, so I strongly suggest you go read it: http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=687280
There are also lines in here from Lord of the Flies and Shakespeare, they, obviously, aren't mine.
I don't remember who it was, and since ff.net is down I can't check, but I'm pretty sure at least one person commented about the format of having speech in "…" and thoughts in '…', they said it was confusing and I am inclined to agree, so I've changed it. Now Sev's thoughts will appear between …. Hope it's clearer and thanks for pointing it out! ^_^
Warning: If you don't like Harry-torture, do not read this chap! If you don't read this chap but want to continue reading my fic, please just review and say so and in the next chap I'll post a little summary of what you need to know, okay? If you do decide to read this chap: I am evil, you have been warned.
Chapter 5: Secret Shared
I stood over what Potter had directed me to. It was a pensieve. I hesitated a moment, watching the gaseous silver swirl. Potter had never talked about his absence after defeating Voldemort (I assumed that was what this was about). Some people asked but their queries fell onto deaf ears. They all gave up easily. Anyone who might have given a damn about Potter had either left or died. All that remained were people who cared about The-Boy-Who-Lived, and the boy had lived, so what was the problem? After Potter was nursed back to health from the verge of death, he went on as if nothing had ever happened. I didn't care. I was consumed by grief bordering on depression. Albus was dead. Nothing else mattered. I didn't care then, so why do I now? The reason was simple, I am in debt. A month after leaving care, Potter came to see me. I hadn't left my chambers or spoken to anyone for months and was in a downward spiral. He asked to be my apprentice in defense against the dark arts and wandless magic. I told him to leave; well more like I kicked him out… violently. He came back, of course. I told him it was of no use to study defense since Voldemort was dead. He laughed and asked me if I really thought the world would be at peace forever. I told him to go study with someone else, and again reminded him of our animosity…violently. It took him longer to come back the next time, but come he did. He asked me if Albus would have wanted me to waste my life, the one that he had tried so hard to save. I tried to kill the boy for simply saying his name in my presence. When he finally woke up four days later, there was a note waiting for him on his bedside table, telling him that he would be to report to my office as soon as he woke up and that I wouldn't tolerate tardiness. He had saved me, again.
***flash back (yes… another one)***
The door to my chambers that had been immobile for months shook under the force of a knocking hand. I glared at the door. It had been weeks since the last person had come to draw me out, I thought they had given up.
"What?" I yelled, angry and hoarse.
"May I come in?" That voice… Potter. I threw a vial at the door sending shards of glass everywhere. "Was that a yes?"
"No, you stupid cheeky prat!" I no longer had any reservations about saying exactly what I thought.
"I guess I have no choice but to enter by force then." He said merrily and blew the door to smithereens, much like a toddler with a bazooka. He stepped over the threshold and glanced around as he walked over to my corner of the room. I kept my wand on him the whole time. When he was halfway across, I stopped him.
"What in hell's name to you want, Potter? And don't take another step or I swear to God I'll blast you off this earth."
"Nice to see you again to, Severus." He smiled and took another step forward, then added words to his challenge, "What's God to you?" His tone relayed a simple calling of a bluff, but I knew he was also asking a deep question of what had become of my life. I ignored both.
"What. Do. You. Want." I growled, keeping my wand on the boy.
"Well since you appreciate directness, I am here to request a favour." I growled. "I wouldn't ask anyone else because you are a leader in the field and one of the sole surviving wielders of a certain talent." I shot a curse at him, which he dodged easily. "Touchy, touchy. Fine, I've had my fun. I request you take me on as your apprentice in the fields of defense against the dark arts, techniques and theory in particular, and wandless magic." I laughed for the first time in a long while, mirthless as it was.
"Expilliarmus!" I shouted and watched as Potter flew into the wall outside my door. He wasn't surprised at all by my attack, and waved as he sailed into the wall with a sickening thud. He got up from the floor after a moment and summoned his wand from my hand.
"Wouldn't want to leave before fixing your door, that'd be just rude." He smiled again, casting repairo on the sawdust lying around. I scowled as he disappeared behind a new door… complete with a window made from the glass shards.
"Bastard."
The next day he came again, but didn't bother knocking, and walked right up to my desk where I was sitting, waking me from my self induced stupor.
"So, have you thought about my query, Severus?"
"No." I replied flatly, not looking up at the boy and pretending to be busy with some books; really I was still quite dazed.
"Researching something?" He asked lazily as he leaned forward on my desk.
"You've amazed me with your keen observational skills, Potter. Yes, I'm researching something quite complex actually; it's way beyond the grasp of your simpleton brain. So. Go…" he didn't move so I looked up at him and glared. "Now." He smirked and reached towards my book, rotated it 180 degrees and set it back down in front of me.
"That might help. But I'm not too sure, my simpleton brain gets confused so easily." I growled at his sarcastic tone and mentally cursed myself for not noticing the book. "Hmm. Maybe you should become my apprentice in the fine art of seeming to be doing work. Yes, this teaching thing could go both ways."
"I'm not teaching you anything, nor can you teach me anything. The only thing I will teach you is how to leave. The door is that way, walk to it, open it, pass through, close it and never come back. Understood?"
He shook his head negatively. "Maybe if you stop acting like a toddler and tell me why you will not take me on, instead of no, no , no, I'd leave."
"Humph. You mean my reasons are so obscure even your superior powers of observation can't make them out?"
"Humour me." I looked him in the eyes, hoping to get something through that thick skull.
"For one, Voldemort is taken care of, so extensive DADA training is superfluous." I saw a look of guilt flash through his face, guilt? Why on earth would Potter fell guilty about killing Voldemort? The look quickly passed as he covered it by disbelieving laughter.
"Really, Severus, who so you take me for? You know as well as I do that this war didn't end with Voldemort. War is eternal, it's just at a slow point right now." As he finished, he blinked in surprise at what he just said and as recognition set in on his face, his expression turned very dark, disappointed, hurt and lost. I noted this strange reaction with more then a bit of curiosity. He seemed sure of himself when he was talking, then immediately appeared to regret it, why? Merlin help me, he's gone mad. Oh well, what do I care? So I ignored him and continued.
"Second, you need to actually posses a natural ability to perform wandless magic in order to learn to use it effectively."
"I have used wandless magic in the past." His tone was now very restricted and forced, he was obviously not willing to go into detail about the incident, and frankly I didn't care.
"Third, I despise you." The boy scoffed. I lifted and eyebrow, "I know the fact that someone could possibly not like you is hard for you to understand, Potter, but believe me, I. Don't. I thought you would have at least noticed that after all these years." He still looked unconvinced; I suppose I'll have to convince him then won't I? I rolled my eyes and pulled out my wand.
"Incendio Interno!" I cast the spell at Potter's mid-section, lighting a fire inside. Harsh, yes. Undeserved, no. He doubled over slightly before wincing as he stood straight and nodded stiffly at me. He turned and I could see his face screw up in pain as he stumbled haltingly out of my office. Out of sight, out of mind. I returned to my researching.
It was after five days that I had finally forgotten about Potter and was back to moping about in my office when I heard the door open.
"Damn you, Potter!"
"Hello, Severus!" He answered chuckling as he approached my desk. "Back to researching I see?"
"You are truly pathetic, Potter. Now go before you regret it." I had had enough, and apparently so had he.
"Merlin, Severus! How daft can you be?! I'm pathetic? You're sitting here day after day just staring at your bloody papers! You haven't left the dungeons in months, haven't published any new papers, haven't come up with any new potions, you haven't even made any potions for that matter! Severus, you're wasting your life!" I leapt up from my chair and splayed my hands on my desk, leaning over in an intimidating manner.
"I don't remember asking for your opinion, Potter. What I do with my life is none of your concern!"
"Oh but I think it is! It's my concern because Albus wanted it to be! He always used to tell me to that you were worth getting to know, he kept pestering me to try to get along with you during Order meetings. I tried, Severus! Oh, Merlin did I try! But you made it so difficult! I was young and I gave up easily, but now- I won't give up on you-"
"Like they did on me?" I finished his sentence for him, but he pretended not to hear me and continued more calmly.
"He tried so hard to save you, Severus. To make sure you lived and now you're just throwing that all away. Why, Severus? Have you no respect for him?" I was angry beyond all words, except two. I whipped out my wand,
"Avada Kedavra!" Potter shook his head sadly at me as the curse rushed towards him. He and I both knew I wasn't powerful enough to kill him, even with that curse, but I would settle with knocking him out for a week or so.
A week later he woke up in the hospital wing with a letter beside his bed,
I, Severus Snape, agree to take you, Harry Potter, on as my apprentice in
defense against the dark arts and wandless magic. You are to report to my
office as soon as possible. You will refer to me as Sir or Professor. I will not tolerate tardiness, cheek or asinine behavior. I am no longer your professor, I am more then that now, and as such I can punish you how I will. Good day.
***end flashback***
He had saved me, again. Now it was time to return the favour.
"Show me 'action and consequence'" I commanded as I dipped my finger in. The world darkened around me and I found my self in Lucius' drawing room. In the center of the large ornate space were Potter and Voldemort. Wands pointed at each other. They were still just making small talk however.
"Sso Harry Potter, we meet again. But thiss time you have ssought me out. Why, I wonder?"
"Don't be silly, Riddle, I came here for tea. I've heard wonderful things about your biscuits." Potter smiled mockingly. Voldemort stared daggers at the usage of his former name, but then grinned in the least threatening way he could manage and replied smoothly.
"Indeed? In that casse. Wormtail! Don't jusst sit there get our guesst some tea!" He yelled at the man cowering beside the wall. As he scurried to the door next to him I looked around at the rest of the room, it was empty save a long table at one end of the room and two doors at the other, both strongly locked. All the death eaters were gone except Wormtail, and Lucius who was standing next to the table looking smug as usual.
"My L-lord the t-tea is in the a-adjoining room, and I-I can't get th-through."
"I ssee. Crucio." He muttered lazily, and turned to Potter. The boy looked like he was torn between enjoying watching the man squirm and pitying him. "You know Potter, it really iss quite difficult to find good help these dayss." With that he ended the curse.
"I suppose we'll just have to forgo the pleasantries then." The boy shrugged.
"Another day perhapss." Voldemort replied off-handedly.
"Unfortunately, that won't be possible. Fulminare!" Potter cast the powerful lightning spell without any of the usual duel formalities or warning, and threw Voldemort to the ground. My, my we are playing dirty…and powerfully too.
"Tssk. Tssk, Potter, not following the ruless?" Voldemort spat while getting up calmly, but trained eyes could see he faltered minutely before standing upright.
"And I suppose you would have me believe you would?" Potter laughed with surprising acrimony.
"Well, now that we've sstarted on the wrong foot- Expilliarmus!" He shot, but Potter blocked it.
"Oh come now, Riddle, I'm not a little kid anymore. Take the gloves off. This is it after all, the battle you and I've been waiting for. Perdo Lunea!" A white bar of light shot out of Potter's wand and hit Voldemort in the shoulder. He winced quickly before pointing his wand at the Potter.
"Gladius Aspergo!" Scores of sharp silver poles flew towards the boy, he dodged some but others found their mark and he found himself on the floor.
"That's more like it." He said, springing to his feet and casting another spell. "Manus Fragor."
"Ah!" Voldemort exclaimed as a tiny explosion occurred in his closed wand hand. All of the spells that Potter was using were ones he had obviously developed himself, as neither I nor Voldemort seemed to know what they would do or how to block them. So that's what you've been doing all year. Clever. Since Voldemort didn't know what the spell would do, the unexpected pain made him drop his wand.
"Accio Wand!" Potter yelled immediately after he finished the previous spell. The wand flew at Potter, but stopped mid-flight as Voldemort also yelled
"Accio Wand!" while holding his hand out. Surprise, surprise! But instead of focusing on his own wand, he pulled for Potter's and since the boy was concentrating on Voldemort's wand, the boy's wand came right to him. Uh oh.
"Humph. Not sso cocky now are we, Potter? My wand won't work for you, but you can keep it none the lesss if you wish, I have no need for it. Ass a matter of fact, I'm sstronger without it. Allow me to demonsstrate, Crucio." With no means to defend himself Potter fell down in agony as Voldemort approached. He ended the spell as he reached the boy and Potter got up slowly to face him. "Defenseless. Just like Black. And I assume you know what happened to him?"
"Yeah. We saved him." He replied smugly. Why does he has to find out this way? I should've told him!
"Oh, but you are misstaken." He cackled. "He iss quite dead, I made sure of that 24 hourss ago." Confusion and denial melted into sorrow and despair as Potter realized it was the truth. Don't get distracted, Potter! He's playing with you! "But don't be too distresssed, he wass begging for it after all. Groveling at my feet, pleading for me to end the torture. Sso I did… after a while." He hissed ominously. Potter's face twisted into anger at Voldermort's lack of respect.
"You bastard. First Ron-"
"Weassley? Oh yess I remember him. He wass fun. I ssliced his sscalp sso that hiss hair would really be red. It wass quite pathetic actually, he kept ssaying that you'd come and ssave him… of coursse I knew you never would. But no matter, I simply shredded hiss tongue and plucked out hiss teeth. He didn't talk much after that." Don't let him get to you, Potter! Stay focused!
"You bloody-!"
"Tut, tut, Potter. Did your mother teach you to talk like that? I suposse she did. She wass a ssavage little whore."
"LIAR!" Potter was fuming now.
"Oh am I? Didn't you ever wonder why everyone liked her sso much?" Potter was speechless in fury, so Voldemort continued. "Then again your father wassn't much better. Oh sure he got lots of medalss and recognition, but what do you think earned him all of that? Hiss skill or hiss vault?" He left the question hanging, Potter seething, but still silent. "Oh but they were a perfect pair. They had sso much in common: ssex, drugss, alcohol. And they were both abhorrent when they found out about their little… accident." On the last word Voldemort looked at Potter suggestively, and then the world went black. It was odd that it did so suddenly, which pensieves never do. I must investigate that.
The blackness faded and the world slowly became clear again. Potter was on the floor, but there was no sign of Voldemort. He sat up very slowly and lifted his wand,
"Apparate" he said. Nothing happened. He tried again, but still nothing happened. Then a wicked chuckle rose from the far wall. It was Malfoy. He strutted over, an arrogant smile plastered to his face.
"Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me." He drawled smugly as he kicked Potter in the head, once again returning the world to darkness. Bastard.
I felt the world swishing around me before a new scene came to life. I was in one of the more secret reception rooms at the Malfoy Mansion. All the heavy green curtains blocked out most of the light, giving the room an eerie atmosphere. There were two throne-like chairs at one end of the room, but nothing else. Lucius was sitting in the right chair looking boredly at Potter who lay in the middle of the room, face down and presumably unconscious.
"Wormtail! Wake him up. I'm tired of waiting."
"Yes, My Lord." I hadn't noticed the crouching figure behind Lucius. As he walked over to Potter, the boy spoke groggily but none the less menacingly.
"If you come any closer I'll make your organs explode one by one." He lifted his head slowly. "Malfoy, what a pleasant surprise. Is it finally time for that tea?" The older man chuckled.
"Oh, but I have something much better to offer you, Harry." Potter eyed him suspiciously. "Allow me to explain. You have killed Voldemort. Congratulations by the way." He wasn't being sarcastic. "Now that he is gone, there is an… opening." He finished redolently. Potter just laughed cynically.
"The famous Harry Potter becoming the next Dark Lord, yeah, that's probable. Humph."
"Don't be silly, Harry. I'm taking his place not you. But with myself moving up, I am in need of a right-hand man."
"Never."
"Now lets not jump to conclusions, Harry. I'm not like Voldemort. I don't hate muggles, I never did. The only thing that drew me to Voldemort was power. Power is everything, Harry. There is nothing else."
"I've heard this before, Malfoy. 'There is no good or evil, only power and those to weak to seek it'. You're wasting your time. You will never be as powerful as Voldemort, they'll beat you and then that'll be the end of the war. Your days are numbered Malfoy, is this how you want to spend them?"
"Silly child, the war will never be over. There may be quiet periods, there may pass tens of years without a single incident, but sooner or later, there'll be a spark between old rivals. That spark will light the fire of prejudice. That fire will turn into an inferno as once again people become split, and the world will be once again be at war. So the question is not do you want to continue this war, war never stops so it can't be continued. The question is, do you want to do something with your life?"
"You're wrong! War is not eternal! If anything would be, it would be peace! Were it not for Voldemort, that's what we would have!"
"You are correct on one point, Harry, war is only as eternal as man. It is human nature to hate, fight and kill. That is what drives us. Don't fool yourself with your so-called morals, Harry. You hated Voldemort, you fought him, you killed him. When you saw Voldemort torture Wormtail, you smiled. You may not have realized it, but you did. Then just now, you proved you hate him, given the chance, you would fight him, and you would kill him. Then what? You said you'd be at peace. Would you? If Fudge took say…Snape, yes I know he's a spy, and sent him to Azkaban without trial for being a DeathEater, you would hate him, you would find a way to fight him, and you would kill him. This would enrage a loyal Ministry worker, he would hate you, he would fight you, and he would kill you. Lupin would hate that ministry worker, he would fight him, and to avenge your death he would kill him. It's a cycle, Harry. There's no way to stop it. What you do with your life won't affect that. Join me." Through out his speech Lucius had been approaching Potter. On the last line he lowered himself to Potter's eye level, and waited as his words sunk in. Potter's face was indifferent. A stone mask. Cold and hard. Then he opened his mouth and spat in Lucius' face.
"You will regret that. Wormtail, when he loses consciousness, bring him to his room." With that he left the room, but before the doors slammed shut he pointed his wand behind his back and lazily muttered,
"Crucio." Potter fell back to the floor, whimpering but not screaming, Lucius really wasn't that powerful, magically anyway. He lay there for minute after minute, jerking and twitching. He finally let out a screech and the room faded to black.
White. All I could see was white; save Potter's head and hands, the rest of him must have been dressed in white robes, crouched in the middle of the room- was it a room? If it was, the walls were so white that you couldn't tell where one ended or began. All I was sure of was that I was standing on something, so there must be a floor. Light seemed to radiate from the very air in the room so there were no shadows. The result was horrible. Like being blind. I could hear Potter moan as he stood slowly. He looked very stiff and sore, but why would he be, he was under the cruciatus until he lost consciousness. That couldn't have been… comfortable. The boy was looking around the room in confusion, rubbing his eyes trying to find walls, or anything that his vision could focus on. He finally gave up after a moment and sat back down with his eyes closed.
Behind me I heard footsteps so I turned around. Lucius, also clothed in white robes, was walking through a dark archway that disappeared after he entered
"So, you're finally awake?" Lucius' voice echoed as he smiled malevolently, advancing on the now standing boy. They looked into each other's eyes, testing each other's will and self control. Lucius finally blinked first. Potter looked quite happy with himself but Lucius wasn't troubled. He smiled quickly then rammed his fist into Potter's abdomen. The boy buckled and fell to the ground gasping for air. The older man chuckled and pulled a vile out of his pocket, pouring the heavy vapour contents over Potter. I recognized the potion immediately; I had brewed it after all. Demen Fog, it was of the painful sort that induced seizures, hypersensitivity to pain and schizothymia, the vapor was also strong enough to seep through clothes and skin. The potion took effect immediately. Potter's eyes glazed over as they darted from non-existent form to non-existent form, and he started to convulse.
"Join me." Lucius ordered. Potter was still under the effects of the potion so he didn't respond right away, but he finally ground out through clenched teeth,
"Never."
"I told you, Harry, power rules above all else: morals, prejudices, skills, principles, hatred… everything. I have power over you, therefore I rule over you. Let me demonstrate." He smiled and rammed his right foot, hard, into the boy's ribcage. Potter let out a pain-filled howl and grabbed his side. Just like before… I had finally recognized the scene that had played out by the tree as the same one that had just happened. Why didn't I recognize the symptoms of my own potion before? Potter stopped convulsing and the schizothymia ended shortly afterwards, but I knew the third side effect lasted the longest because of the flig root in combination with hippogriff talons.
"Still not convinced, Harry? Well perhaps with a little more… persuasion." He smiled wickedly and took out his wand. So that's why Potter had screamed so intensely. I wonder if Malfoy knew that while still under the effects of my potion his hostage could be killed by the cruciatus. I bet that would've been a nasty surprise for him. What should I have expected though? He was never any good at potions. Stupid git. My thoughts were calm, but truly I was anything but. I knew what was going to happen next, the boy was going to scream. I had heard it before, and I had no intention of hearing it again. It had been terrible, had I not been the cool, calm and collected man I am, I would have run away. I wanted to just get out of Potter's pensieve, but I didn't know what I had come to find out: what the hell was going on? Finally my curiosity and will power won out.
"Crucio!" Lucius yelled, quite enjoying the sight and sounds of Potter in tremendous pain. It was all I could do, on the other hand, to keep myself from running away from that horrible, piercing noise that made your gut melt and your hands shake. I covered my ears and backed away from the child. I was about to start screaming myself, just to block out the horrible noise when it finally ended. I slumped to the floor panting, the memories that scream had brought back were not pleasant ones, and I struggled to burry them once again. I did so by turning my attention towards Potter. I knew he wasn't dead, but there was something about a semi-unconscious body curled up on the floor that instilled worry. The room started to fade and the last thing that I heard before being plunged into darkness was Lucius' voice.
"Weakling. Maybe I don't need him after all… well not as an ally anyway… but maybe- yes," he chuckled, "one can never have to many toys…"
The white room appeared before my eyes. Potter was sitting, hunched, in the middle; amazingly he still had his glasses and was presently trying to clean them with shaky hands and his white robe. This room is an odd choice for Lucius, he usually prefers the traditional dungeons. I wonder if- but my thoughts were interrupted by Lucius entering the same way he had previously.
"Have a nice nap, Harry?" The boy in question slowly got up and turned to man, staring daggers at him. "Come now, Harry, don't be so harsh. I was quite generous, giving you four whole days to sleep. Consequently, you must be thirsty…" Four days with no food or water and you think he must be thirsty, Malfoy? My, my we are insightful. "hmm, now how to remedy that I wonder…"
"With water you idiot." Potter tried to spit harshly, but his throat must have been so dry all he could manage was a strained croak.
"You want water, Harry? Well… I think I can manage that…" He smiled, not a good sign. "I'll come back when you're done." He said, as he turned and left the room through the same disappearing archway. Before Potter could try and protest, water started falling from the ceiling like a very heavy rain. He kneeled down slowly, though it was obvious he couldn't wait for his lips to touch the water, and started to drink without even testing the water. Idiot. The water level was rising fast but Potter didn't seem to notice until his face became submerged. He straitened up quickly and let out a hiss of pain at the sudden movement. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, and slowly I could see that the pain ebbed away. He opened his eyes and looked around.
"So he wants to drown me." He sighed, and looked up at the holes in the ceiling, trying to see if he could stop the flow. When none presented itself, he sighed. "There are worse ways to die. I guess I really wouldn't mind if this water wasn't so damn cold." I couldn't feel the water or the cold but it must have been quite frigid, for the boy's breath was now coming out in puffs of water vapour, and his nose and ears were red. The pure water was thigh high now. It was fascinating looking down; the water seemed to go on forever due to the odd properties of the "walls". Potter gasped as the water reached his abdomen and struggled to breath again. The water level was rising faster now, and was up to the boy's chest.
'Bloody c-cold." Potter shivered, his lips were blue and I could see little ice crystals forming in calmer parts of the room. Potter started flailing his arms and lurching his body, what he was doing I couldn't say, but I knew he wasn't succeeding.
"Move, damn you!" He shouted as he pulled at his legs. The water was now shoulder high. "Move! Move!" He cried, panic filling his voice as the water reached his chin. "MOVE!" The boy was panicking now, but I wasn't surprised. He thought he was going to die. I knew better, Lucius would never kill him in such a passive manner. Perhaps Potter knew too, but right now his survival instincts were telling him other wise. He took one last gasp of air before the water rose above his head. He splashed at the surface with his arms trying vainly to get air but the water was coming in much too fast now. In no time it was at his elbows, then at his wrists, then far above him. He reached at the surface, struggling against his feet which were apparently anchored to the floor. If he had had the means, the look in Potter's eyes said he would've cut off his feet without hesitation. Even with out means he was attempting to rip his ankles from his feet. It was futile and soon enough he the reflex to breath won out and he inhaled the water. It wasn't a pretty sight. When the water hit his lungs his body tried to cough it up, only succeeding in breathing in more causing him to jerk around under water. After a moment, all movement ceased. The boy's head, hair and arms floated lazily above him and he swayed like seaweed. His face was calm, he looked peaceful, contented. The world turned to black.
'No wonder Potter hates white.' I was in the white room again, and it looked as if this was where Potter spent his entire absence. The boy lifted himself off the ground with his arms and blinked a few times as if trying to remember what had just happened. Suddenly he jumped up and whipped himself around taking in his environment, a look of surprise and confusion on his face. He proceeded to study his hands as he let his right index explore his left hand, finally pinching it. Convinced that he was solid and actually alive he started walking. The room was still such a pure white that neither of us could tell if the walls (if there were any) were a meter or a mile away. So he kept walking, and I followed.
Though we must have been walking for five minutes, in the right of my peripheral vision I saw the dark archway appear as if we hadn't moved at all. I turned to Lucius who walked through, though for the first time not alone. A Death Eater in mask and cloak followed him.
"Have a nice swim, Harry?" Potter turned and glared at the man, contempt clearly written on his face.
"The water was a tad chilly." He spat.
"Oh it was? What a shame." Potter scoffed. "You know I really am sorry."
"I'm sure." He replied sarcastically.
"Oh but I am, you see I even brought you a little present." He said motioning to the man behind him.
"Too weak to torture me yourself, Malfoy?"
"Harry, I'm hurt. I told you it was a present! Well you'll se I suppose… have fun." Lucius bid as he turned and left through the arch.
"So who are you, anyway?" The boy asked as he stood defensively where he was.
"Don't' you recognize me, Harry?" His head snapped up, eyes wide, face white as if he'd seen a ghost. The man behind the mask chuckled, lowered his hood and cast his mask aside. I gasped. Potter backed up scared.
"No, your dead!" The boy's voice was rising in panic.
"Is that how you greet your best friend, Harry?" It was Ron Weasly; the boy with which Voldemort had tested my loyalty. I passed.
"No- but- no you can't- you aren't- oh god I'm going crazy already! It's only been- how long has it been? I know I was out for four-"
"Harry?" Potter didn't hear Weasley's worried tone and just kept rambling to himself, pacing slightly.
"-days, but how long before that? And how long has it been since the water? It couldn't have been too long could it? Although I was dead- how did he revive me anyway? I've never heard of that sort of spell. How long did he leave me dead? The spell couldn't work after too long, but why did he revive me in the first place? He couldn't still be hung up on-" Potter was consciously trying to ignore the "ghost" and keep his mind busy, probably trying to drown out the memories that seeing his friend had brought back, while Weasley was watching with confusion.
"-Harry! Look, Harry! I'm alive, you're not crazy!" Weasley exclaimed, hoping to stop his friend's ranting. He didn't succeed until he actually walked up to Potter and grabbed his arm. Potter looked up at him in shock. "I told you I'm alive." He said mock-smugly.
"But Snape said-"
"You believed that ruddy git over your own eyes and your best friend?" I growled, but of course they didn't hear me.
"But your dressed like- them." The boy took a step back, worry in his voice.
"Well, it's only proper! Being one and all, I mean." He replied matter-of-factly.
"What?! But why? How could you?" He asked disbelievingly.
What?! But why? How could they? I wondered disgustedly.
"Well when you didn't come, you didn't leave me much choice you know." Weasly replied bitterly. Potter's face fell, and he looked down at the ground.
"I- I'm sorry- I-"
"Oh you're sorry! Well that doesn't change much now does it? Doesn't take away the pain of having my scalp and tongue mutilated! Doesn't take away the hunger and thirst I felt when they only fed me once a day! Doesn't take away the shame I suffered when I finally realized that the hero of the wizarding world was too busy signing autographs to come and rescue his best friend and that the whole time the Dark Lord was right!"
"Ron! Please! I couldn't!" Potter pleaded to his fuming friend, but it was nothing to hamper the famous Weasley temper.
"Of course you could! You did it for Sirius!"
"That- that was different! Please- Ron-"
"You're right, Harry! It was different! All you would have had to do to save me would be to convince Snape! You found out about Snape's test long before it happened in a dream! You could have convinced Dumbledore to sacrifice Snape's cover for my life! But you chose Snape over me."
Indeed?
"Ron, please! Let me explain!"
"There's nothing to explain! You chose a man who tortured you all through Hogwarts over me, your best friend. You're a traitor."
As always, a bad choice of words, Weasley. That was a very touchy subject for Potter ever since his 6th year when Neville turned out to be working for Voldemort. A disgruntled student once called Harry a traitor after he had taken points from Gryffindor, the little bugger was lucky to get out alive. Harry's head snapped up, and his eyes narrowed.
"Look who's talking."
"You're not still hung up on Death Eaters being evil are you, Harry? I mean come on, don't be so naïve. What Dumbledore fed us was all simplistic kids stuff. Voldemort was right, and so is Malfoy. There is only power, none of this bloody good and evil crap. Blimey! I can't believe you haven't realized it yet! I mean think about it, Harry! All the gold and power you want!"
"And all you have to do is kill innocent people." Potter responded darkly.
"Now Harry, nobody's innocent, you know that."
"Not anymore…" Potter mused under his breath.
"Exactly. So why try to be? Why live a lie, Harry? Embrace life! I just told Lord Voldemort that I'd do it, I'd join him, and all the pain ended! All you have'ta do is just tell Malfoy you'll do it! Then you'll get out of this bloody white room, and get a top spot! What else could'ya want?"
"Not to be a bloody pawn in some idiot's game."
"Harry, you just insulted my master! That's worse then someone insulting my friends! You know how angry that makes me, Harry! Why would you do that?" Weasley's face was turning red, and a vein in his forehead was throbbing, I had never seen him so mad. He chuckled as a heavy led pipe appeared in his right hand and he advanced on the boy. "Except now we're not at school are we? No one to hold me back, and now I have the power. I told'ya Harry, it's all about power." Weasley took one step forward, lifting the pipe and coming down with it across Potter's cheek. There was a loud thud as his head smashed into the floor.
"Et tu Bruté…" Potter whispered before the world was black.
When the room came back into view, Potter was rising into a sitting position, lightly fingering the bump on the back of his head. An ugly, bloody bruise had developed on his left cheek from Weasley's blow. He brought his fingers over to his cheek and then back in front of his face and sighed at the blood. He closed his eyes with a very hurt expression on his face and lay down on the white floor, his face towards me. I knew it wasn't the wounds that brought him this grievance. It was the betrayal. I saw his face twist in sadness as he obviously tried hard not to cry. He probably wouldn't have won, had the battle not been interrupted by another foe, this time a purely external one. An extremely angry looking Lucius. The arch he entered through was behind Potter, and he was obviously to preoccupied to notice the light tapping as the man's pointed patent leather shoes approached him. It was never a good idea to ignore a Malfoy, indeed what they hated most was being treated as insignificant. Potter did notice however as the tip of Lucius' shoe connected sharply with the muscle between his spine and left ribcage. He swiveled and pushed himself away from the towering man.
"Well, hello to you too, Malfoy." Potter spat, he couldn't have yet looked the man in the face for had he done so he would not have said a word. Lucius was fuming. His eyes were slits and his lips were pressed into a thin white line. He was quite intimidating.
"Get up." The man growled. At his tone Potter looked at the man and lost considerable colour from his face. Instead of getting up as asked, he backed away past me.
"Get up!" Lucius yelled ferociously. Perhaps seeing symbolism in Lucius' change of tone, the boy got up slowly, taking as many steps back during the process as could be inconspicuously.
"Come here… Now!" The boy hesitantly took one step forward before stopping, anxiety plainly written on his face. Lucius wasn't pleased. He took two steps forward and violently backhanded a heavy piece of iron chain across Potter's right cheek. The boy was thrown to the floor from the force and blood was trickling down from the corner of his mouth. He stayed down not sure of what to do, probably hoping that if he didn't provoke Lucius, he would stop soon. Unlikely. I had seen Lucius in these moods; the captives rarely came out alive. I shuddered as I realized that here Lucius seemed to be able to summon any weapon at will, and with his love of muggle devices…
Not good, definitely not good. I don't need to see this. I don't want to see this. I'm leaving.
~ Help! Sir please! You- you must-~ Potter's voice ran through my head again, No, I can't. I must find out what happened. For Albus, for Ha- A scream pulled me from my thoughts. I snapped my head up just in time to see Lucius holding Potter up by the neck, his other arm pulling something out of the boy's side, an old dull short-sword.
Shit. Potter was gasping for air, eyes wide at the pain. Lucius laughed shortly and hit the boy across the side of his head with the blood laden instrument. He let Potter fall to the floor and the boy curled up around his wound, still gasping for air. Lucius smirked and kicked Potter in the back, the force straitening him out. He seemed to like this reaction, and so kicked the boy again directly in his new gaping wound. Potter let out another scream of anguish, this seemed to excite Lucius, there was a glint in his eyes as he picked up and threw Potter several feet away. As he approached, a cat-o-nine tails appeared in his hand. Lucius' favourite. Custom made its tails were actually thin metal chains with perpendicular spikes at the end to dig into and rip up the victim's flesh. He approached the whimpering boy slowly and then circled him, a hawk stalking its prey. He kicked the curled boy in the back, once more causing him to straighten and a cry of pain to tear out of the boy's throat. Lucius snapped his fingers and cuffs suddenly pinned the boy's arms and legs to the floor. Satisfied with his prey, Lucius dove down with his whip. Blood flew all over the white space and stained the floor as wails of agony escaped the boy's very being. I had to cover my mouth and turn away as I was hit by a wave of nausea at the sight of the gore. My knees buckled and I slid to the ground, breathing deeply I struggled to regain composure and ignore the screams coming from a boy only a meter away that no one could help. The room began to fade, I knew Potter was loosing the battle for consciousness, but some battles are better lost then won.
At least he won't feel the rest of what Lucius will do, not until he wakes… Unless he doesn't-
"Vigilo!" The room returned to full brightness, evidently Lucius wasn't finished with his prey. I turned to see the manacles flicker out of existence as an energized and numbed Potter jumped to his feet and started to run. Lucius just stood where he was, laughing. Before the boy had gone five meters I heard wild barking. I looked back at Lucius and saw he was holding two mad Dobermans by the collar and smiling maliciously. He let them go and laughed even harder as Potter ran a fast as he could, running for his life. Potter never had a chance, he hadn't eaten in days, maybe weeks, and Lucius' spell wouldn't last long. The Dobermans were right behind him in a second, biting at his heels. The boy put out a final burst of speed as adrenaline pulsed through him. It wasn't enough. One of the dogs caught the boy's ankle between its dagger-like fangs. He tried to twist to keep his balance but fell on his back as the drooling dogs jumped up on him and began biting his chest and clawing at his abdomen, blood began pooling around the struggling boy. Potter screamed and screamed as Lucius just laughed until finally the merciful blackness ended the screams, but not the laughter,
never the laughter.
"Harry?" A muted feminine voice was calling to the boy, the room was sill just coming out of darkness. "Harry, come on, wake up! Please, Harry, you must hurry!" The room was now bright again, but very out of focus. I could make out two figures, one kneeling on the floor, and the other lying down with their head in the other's lap. I assumed the later was Potter but I couldn't tell who the other was.
"Un… wha" Potter tried to get up out of the other's lap but yelped in pain after moving a centimeter and fell back into the other, breathing deeply.
"Shh, don't move Harry. Here." There was a mumbled word and then the world became clear so suddenly it stung my eyes.
"He-Hermione?" Potter asked weakly, his glasses now repaired and on his face. In response Granger just nodded and stroked the boy's bloody cheek. I could see Potter's pained face loose much of its sharpness as she comforted him. Gently then, for the first time, the blackness came again.
"Wait! No, Harry! You must stay awake! Come on, open your eyes, just open your eyes." He complied slowly opening his eyes half way. "That's right, Harry, just stay awake, okay? Here, it's water, drink, okay Harry? Here." She tipped the glass that she had conjured into his languidly opened mouth. He sputtered at first but then drank fervently as Granger watched, chewing her lip, obviously fretting about Potter's condition. I was doing the same; the once pristine robe was in tatters, the only bits left hung around his hips, it was hard to distinguish blood from skin on his torso, if indeed there was any skin left, his arms, legs and face weren't as bad, there were gashes and large bruises all over them and they would have been ghastly had I not been comparing the two. It wasn't a pleasant sight; I didn't want to think what kind of feeling it was.
"Harry- can you- I mean- do you think- if I helped you- would you be able to stand up?" She sounded quite worried at the very thought of moving Potter. He was waif thin and very pale, besides being covered in his own blood. He gave her a small smile,
"I can always try." She nodded back encouragingly and slid herself out from under the boy; he winced as she lowered him to the ground.
"I'm going to start by helping you sit, alright?" He nodded slightly and she supported him by the shoulders as he sat up. Potter closed his eyes and put a hand to forehead as the world started to spin.
"Harry?"
"Dizzy." She nodded and brought him back down slowly, thankfully the word steadied shortly.
"Do you mind if I transport you, Harry?" He shook his head. "Mobilicorpus." She stood, the boy floating at her waist. "We've really got to go, Malfoy will be here any minute."
Shit.
"Unfortunately, your calculations seem to be a bit off." Lucius' leering voice came from behind Granger making her face loose all colour. He chuckled, "crucio."
"I'm so sorry." Potter breathed to Granger as they both fell to the ground, one lamenting the other writhing, both in pain.
Lucius ended the curse promptly and looked down to the children on the floor.
"You weren't planning on going anywhere were you? It's impolite to leave without saying good-bye. But then so is breaking and entering. Well, since you obviously weren't educated in manners as children, I'll just have to do that for you now then." He sighed wistfully. "It's been far too long since I've heard a girl beg, this shall be most enjoyable" he smirked, "for me that is. Crucio." Granger reacted the same way as previously, she writhed and screeched in pain. As I watched, I couldn't help but notice the difference between her screech and Potter's scream, firstly the intensity was much different, I could tell Lucius was going easy on her, but why? I never knew him as one to induce less then maximum pain. Secondly, she didn't sound desperate or shocked by the pain; it was as if she were expecting it.
Curious. I looked over to Potter to see if he had noticed anything as I had. He had not. He was obviously more preoccupied with the fact that his friend was in pain, not caring about the specifics. He was on his back with his head tilted towards the girl, an intense look of guilt on his face, his hand reached out to her but he didn't touch her as if afraid to cause more pain. So he lay there, longing to comfort her, and she lay there, the curse over, longing to lean into his touch, but neither did.
"Oh how I've missed that sound." Lucius sighed happily, "I really should let you recover before I treat myself again, shouldn't I?" He asked Granger lazily as he crouched beside her, running his finger along the edge of her face. "But I never was a patient one. Cru-"
"Please!" She shrieked, grabbing the front of Lucius' pant leg. "Please, no! I'll do anything just, please not again. Please!" He stood quickly, wrenching his pants from her hold as if she were contaminating them, then said with a sneer,
"Anything hmm? Well, you are a clever girl, perhaps I could find a use for you…I am willing to purge you of your sins against me, if you pledge allegiance towards me. So, what do you say, child?"
"Never!" She spat at him, then on his shoes and repeated more firmly, "never."
"Oh? What a shame." He smiled at his own witty sarcasm, "Crucio." She screeched again, at this point I longed for my own quiet dungeons. The curse ended after a very brief period, but the girl was still gasping between her words,
"I … am … yours." She passed out and Lucius smiled at his victory. Potter bridged the gap between the two friends and finally clasped his hand around a bit of her cloak, but it was too late.
"Mobilicorpus." Granger floated behind Lucius as he left the room, the boy's already weak grasp broken.
I never suspected Granger to be the type to switch sides so quickly, but I suppose she saw the futileness of fighting a losing battle. She had a perceptiveness that Potter lacked, why he hadn't joined Lucius yet I don't know. I've always believed that people only have the morals the can afford, but why was Potter holding out? How could he still be fighting for these principles after all that pain? Torture works. I know it does, it's been proven. I've proven it. Everyone concedes sooner or later with enough force. Why is it taking Lucius so long? Potter couldn't just be holding out because of his beliefs, there must be something more. I looked over to Potter, hoping to get a glimpse into his psyche. His face was blank as he stared straight forward at the spot were he had touched his friend. I didn't know what he was thinking, and wasn't pretentious enough to try to guess. In the span of only a few days both his best friends had betrayed him and he blamed himself, I would never be able to understand how he was feeling. I wondered if he had gone mad, it was quite likely and I started accepting it as fact before remembering that this was all in the past, surely I would've noticed if he were mad in the present. I was uneasy about the amount of uncertainty this thought brought, so I cast it aside and I watched him. For hours I watched, and for hours he stared, unmoving until sleep claimed him and the room disappeared.
The comforting blackness was suddenly bathed in white as Potter woke yelping in pain from a nasty kick to his shoulder. Lucius was standing above him, a smug grin on his face.
"Oh, sorry Harry, did I wake you?" The boy just glared at him feebly. "Are you not speaking to me now? I said I was sorry, Harry. It's not good to hold grudges, forgive and forget, you know." Potter looked like he wanted to yell and scream at the man, but when he opened his mouth all that came out was a weak and hoarse,
"bastard." Malfoy's grin broadened.
"Harry, that's not very polite now is it. Crucio." Damn that scream. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. A cold sweat came over me and I sank to my knees. I had heard worse, I usually could handle this level, but after seeing all that I had, it compounded and it was too much. Too much pain, misery, guilt, fear, hatred, desperation.
"Too much, Harry?" I got back up shakily as he ended the curse. "Well maybe it's for the best anyway. I am very busy today!" There was an excited glint in Lucius' eyes that was very disconcerting. Potter didn't notice it; he was lying flat on his back eyes squeezed shut against the lingering pain. "Would you like to know what I'm doing today, Harry?" He asked leaning over. The boy didn't respond.
Never ignore a Malfoy, Potter. Never. Sure enough, Lucius' grin faded and a nine iron appeared in his right hand.
"Never disregard me!" Potter's eyes flashed open just in time to see the heavy pole being smashed into his rib cage. From what I could tell at least two of his ribs were now broken, the bones were visible since his skin had not yet healed. The boy shouted a pain filled protest, but Lucius just smiled.
"Would you like to know what I'm doing today, Harry?" This time the boy gasped in pain as Lucius leaned his weapon down on Potter's chest. "I'll take that as a yes." He smirked and began to pace. "Well you see, so far I've been waiting for your support to make my first move as Dark Lord. But I am growing very tired of waiting, so I decided that I don't really need you all that much. You'll be an asset once you join, no doubt, but I am a very powerful wizard and I know I can handle this on my own." Indeed? Potter was now following Lucius with his gaze, a look of dread on his face. "For my first attack I plan to take about 30 to 40 muggles captive and hold them for ransom. It's quite simple really, I have 10 Death Eaters willing to take part, which means three to four muggles per wizard; a very reasonable ratio. Once they are captured I will hold them ransom for the release of many of my old colleagues, if the Ministry of Magic doesn't comply I'll simply torture or kill them, depending on their status in muggle society." Potter was fuming, were it not for the fact that he was too weak to move, Lucius would surely be dead by now.
"It'll never work, you bastard!" the boy rasped. He was right, it mustn't have worked since I never heard about it.
"Never say never, Harry." Lucius smirked, kicking Potter again before leaving.
"No! Come back, damn it!" Potter yelled roughly, trying to get to his knees before falling not a second later. He swore at himself for being so weak, and glared determinedly at the now disappearing black archway. He pulled himself into a crawling position and started to drag himself to the spot where the archway once was. Almost immediately the world started to spin and the floor became a seesaw. Potter lowered his head to the ground and breathed deeply. I steadied myself in a crouching position and continued to watch the boy lugging himself determinedly. When he stopped, there was no indication that an archway was ever there. If I hadn't seen the glint of satisfaction in his eyes I would have thought he had given up, but wherever he was, it was where he wanted to be. Why he wanted to be there I wasn't sure but I knew I'd soon find out, exhausted from that little bit of movement, he fell asleep.
The boy woke up slowly, careful where he put his weight as he sat up. At first he seemed dazed as if he had just woken after a long night's rest, then as he recognized his surroundings his face turned hard with determination. He looked better then he had before, the blood and flesh was still showing through on his torso but he was less pale. He gathered himself up slowly into a crouching position perpendicular and a little behind his former spot. At first he winced with pain and the world started to spin, but he conquered both by resting his head in his left hand and closing his eyes. Soon after, the dark arch appeared to his right and Lucius walked in angrily muttering to himself, not noticing the boy in his preoccupation. Potter's eyes snapped open at the light tapping of his shoes and he waited with bated breath as Lucius walked further into the room. When the man was a meter in, Potter spun around through the arch with adrenaline-induced speed. I was pulled behind him as he found himself in a poorly lit corridor. I could hear Lucius from behind me shout as he perceived the boy's absence. I could hardly see Potter but I knew his movement since I was being pulled along not far behind. He was running fast, faster then I would have ever suspected a boy could in such a condition. It must have been survival instinct… and fear. Let's not forget fear. Lucius was already looked livid, I'm sure Potter's escape won't do much for his temper. If Potter gets caught- no he lived so he must make it out. I wonder what kind of dumb luck he'll have this time?
"Harry!" I could hear Lucius in pursuit, the corridor was getting lighter now, and I could see more of my surroundings. Potter was a few paces ahead of me, panting and looking around frantically at the walls for some sign of an exit or place to hide. The walls were quite bare for a Malfoy residence and surprisingly the place looked as if it hadn't been cleaned or even walked through in years. There were no doors anywhere in sight and no windows or hints of natural light, the floor was rough concrete and behind me I could hear the tapping of Lucius' shoes. I looked over my shoulder at him, he was mad as hell and approaching fast. If Potter kept up this speed, he might out run him, but where would he go? I doubted there would be any exit signs or ground floor windows he could escape through.
'This should be interesting.' I wasn't worried at all about Potter's safety since I knew he would be escaping, after all I had to put up with him every day, I was quite certain he lived. All the while though, I could feel something nagging in the back of my brain.
Why is nothing ever certain? Potter was slowing down, the world was once again becoming unstable. Ahead of me I saw Potter staggering, behind me Lucius was on my heels. He passed me in an instant and pushed Potter to the ground, he cried out in pain as his raw flesh contacted the cold, coarse floor.
"Stupefy!"
"Ennervate!" The boy jerked back to life, once again we were in the white room. Lucius had caught him.
This is not good. Not. Good. Potter seemed to share my opinion as he gazed up in horror at the hard eyes staring down at him. There was a long silence in which neither looked away or blinked. I was reminded of the first time they had had such a staring contest. Potter had won that time, but now after so much abuse I wondered if Lucius had broken the boy. Lucius blinked.
Your pride will be the death of you, Potter. You should have let him win, he might have gone easier on you. But now- now you're in for it… Crap. I was right. Potter had hurt the one thing that Lucius cared for most, his pride. He would pay. Lucius' rage was evident not only on his face but in his posture, scent and sound; he oozed malevolence.
"Power." He spat as he snapped his fingers causing restraints to appear on Potter's ankles, wrists, neck and hips, tying him to the ground. As Lucius walked over to the boy's feet an electric weed whacker flickered into his right hand and a sledgehammer and railroad spike appeared beside the boy. Without a pause he flicked on the muggle tool and brought the whirling blades down on Potter's shins.
"No more running, Harry." Flesh went flying as shrill cries were torn from the boy struggling on the ground. I could feel the bile rising up in my throat as white bone was starting to appear through the blood, and Lucius moved on to the boy's thighs. My skin started to go cold and I was sure I would be sick.
No one can live through something like this. How the hell is he still alive? Lucius was paying no mind to anything but the wounds he was inflicting. He was in a trance-like state, smiling and cackling at the blood and flesh surrounding him. He didn't even notice when the boy stopped crying and faded into merciful unconsciousness.
'What? No. No more… I said no more, damn it!' My protests couldn't stop the world from growing clear and bright, couldn't stop me from seeing a battered boy lying not half a meter away from me. He was on his back, eyes glazed staring at the ceiling. He didn't seem to be conscious og it, but his right hand was fiddling with a piece of his own flesh. This was immensely disturbing, but I found it hard to concentrate on anything but the boy's legs. Evidently Lucius hadn't stopped after the boy lost consciousness, his legs, if you could call them that, were mutilated. Bone stuck out one place, huge deep gashes covered others. There was no untouched skin left.
No wonder he always wears pants, Poppy's good, but nobody's that good. I found myself staring at him, sick fascination. A line from a muggle book came to mind suddenly,
'Like flies to wanton boys, we are to the gods… he is to Lucius. So is that it? Is it really all just about power?' I shook myself, 'no it's not. All gods aren't good. There are good gods and evil gods. Good people and evil people. Unfortunately for Potter, Lucius is of the evil variety… Speak of the devil.' Lucius strutted in, a smirk on his face; obviously he was in a better mood today, a very good thing indeed. He walked past the boy indifferently and snapped his fingers; in front of him a large cauldron appeared. I moved over closer and saw that the content was a bubbling dark green liquid.
"Get up." Lucius ordered without even turning around.
"Right." Potter scoffed feebly, balling his fists.
"I said get up! … Get up before I cast the cruciatus on you!"
"I. Can't. You broke my legs remember?" The boy's voice was weak, but resentment rang through it clearly.
"Bacali Crus." Potter's legs became stiff as boards as he was pulled up by the waist into a standing position. He wasn't really putting any weight on his legs, he was just sort of hovering. He's so thin…has he eaten anything since coming here? He must have, otherwise he would be dead, but- I've never seen him eat…strange.As soon as he was upright the world started to spin. "Come." Lucius motioned for Potter to come stand next to him by the cauldron. The boy looked hesitant but slowly he started to float staggeringly forwards. "This, Harry, is Ashphodel, Octopus ink and Unicorn blood." All this time Lucius seemed mesmerized by the liquid, never looking away, however when Potter started to faint he took notice and sighed in frustrated. "This is my favourite device Harry and you're ruining the experience!" He took out his wand and muttered a spell at Potter, "Roborare." He began hovering once again and the world stopped spinning.
"Now let's continue, shall we? Do you know what this does?" His attention was back on the potion and he didn't wait for a response. "The brewer decides a target, when this selected target makes contact with the liquid it will take five seconds for it to heat to the exact melting point of the target. In this case, the target is your skin." Potter started to back away, clearly not intending to be anywhere near the potion. "You're not interested? Well maybe with some persuasion," Potter looked terrified as Lucius pulled out a wand. But that's not- that's Potter's wand! I could see desire burning in the boy's eyes as he recognized his wand. Lucius just chuckled and held it over the cauldron.
"No!"
"Happy fishing." He dropped it in. Potter lunged at the cauldron, intent on plunging his arms into the liquid for his wand. Once his hands toughed the liquid, though, he immediately pulled out of the liquid yelping in pain form the heat.
"5" Lucius counted down as Potter once again lunged into the burning liquid, screeching, but keeping that determined look on his face.
"4" Between shouts of pain I could see something resembling concentration pass over the boy's face. I leaned in, curious, and saw the corner of his mouth mumble something like evanesco, the invisibility charm. Did he actually get his wand?
"3" Potter tore his severely red arms out of the cauldron. I watched his hands closely for any clues as to what he was doing. It was a good thing Lucius was never that observant because I noticed right away that he was holding something in each hand. Whatever was in his right he dropped right away, but his left stayed clenched around something. Smart boy, don't let the enemy know you have the advantage. But you only have that advantage for 2 more seconds. Best hurry whatever you're planning.
"2" Potter surprised me by returning to the cauldron and looking down momentarily at the contents. In his face flickered fear and dread, but most prominent was determination. He let out a mighty yell as he once again thrust his hands into the boiling fluid. Why?
"1" That same concentration showed on his face before he tried to conceal satisfaction as he ripped his raw arms from the pot for the last time, falling to the ground panting, swearing and contorting his face in agony.
"Couldn't find it Potter?" Lucius chuckled, smiling proudly at his hissing cauldron. I leaned close to the boy's face in order to try and decipher any little piece of emotion that could hint at what had just happened, but all I saw was pain. A more evident answer came from Lucius as he waved his hand over his beloved pot and the boy's wand floated out, steaming. No! I was so sure- no, he had it! I saw the satisfaction! But he must have been so close!
"Well you don't get first prize, Harry, but how about a consolation." Lucius snapped his fingers and a glass of water appeared where the cauldron once had. "Well, Harry, I'm a busy man you know, so I'll see you later, batter luck next time!" He was gone. Potter craned his neck to look at the glass, desire fighting with ever-constant pain. Lucius, you bastard. You knew his hands were to raw to hold the damn glass! Damn it! As if you hadn't already taken enough away! Now you leave this taunting reminder of his rotten situation. The glass of water, a normal life, he can see it, he can taste it, he could take it, but he wouldn't be able to hold on to it, he'd just drop it and it would shatter. So instead he has to watch it disappear before his eyes, unable to do anything. Bloody hell, as if he didn't have enough to be depressed about… We both watched the water evaporate for hours until the boy fell asleep.
When Potter awoke, he didn't move at first. I could tell something was going on through his mind, some plan was being cross examined and scrutinized. He lay pensive for several minutes before a half smile appeared on his weary, sunken face. Let's hope this plan is better then your last one, the one that brought you here.
"Here goes nothing." He breathed as he closed his eyes and concentrated. Watching him I realized just how true that statement was. He really has nothing left, doesn't he? The Weasleys are scattered across the world, his father's best friend has been driven out for being a werewolf, his only friends are now his enemies and his godfather is dead. Who's left from his old life? Poppy, Flitwick … and I. So that's why he was so intent on being my apprentice, he was clinging to the past, his old life of innocence and youth. It's not right to live in the past though, Harry taught me that and I owe it to him to return the favour.
"Appareo." Potter commanded. He was now sitting with his arm outstretched in deep concentration. To my left I saw something brown flicker. His wand! But how did he know he could do wandless magic? The boy smiled tiredly and dragged himself by the arms over to pick it up. So what was does Lucius have then? I remembered that Potter was holding something the last time he endured the heat. Did Potter have enough power to transfigure something into his wand well enough to fool Lucius? I suppose he must have, then that means- I smiled, congratulations, Harry, you've beat him. Potter was just tucking his wand beneath a fold of thread-bare robe. There was barely enough of the rag left to conceal the wand, but luckily Potter managed it as a dark arch appeared beside him.
"Bacali Crus. Come here." Lucius walked swiftly into the room, when he was a few paces in he stopped. Potter wiped any emotion from his face, instead showing fear and pain, until he was right next to Lucius.
"Don't move or I swear I'll fucking blow your head off!" Potter whipped out his wand and yelled angrily at a very surprised Lucius, whom he was holding at wand point. The surprise quickly faded into calm though.
"Running away from your problems, Harry?"
"You have no right, you bastard! Now shut the fuck up!" Potter was fuming, and he had every right to be, I just hope it doesn't cloud your judgment. Lucius, on the other hand, didn't seemed disturbed at all.
"You'll never succeed you know, Harry, even if you do make it out of here alive. You see I have a little secret to share with you." My ears perked up. "This room is enchanted two fold. The first is an enchantment that keeps you alive, this room supplies directly to your body enough water and nutrients so that you don't die of starvation, suffer yes, die no. The second enchantment is quite ingenious… let me explain. Whatever happens to you, both internally and externally, in this room is sort of- recorded, and whenever I choose, I can make you relive it all, all the pain, fear and misery. There are no spells, potions, charms or anything that can prevent or stop the reliving. Do you understand? Even if you are on the other side of the world, all it takes from me is a simple incantation to make you suffer. You may not be physically injured by the reliving, but the pain will be quite real." No. He's had to relive all of this! Why didn't he tell anyone? I can't believe he's had to endure this torture more then once! How often has it occurred in the past, why didn't I notice? Does his potion prevent these relivings, or does it just stop the pain? Questions ran through my mind a mile a minute, Potter on the other hand seemed quite calm.
"Fortunately for me, dead people can't incant."
"Ha. Don't fool yourself Harry, you're too weak to kill me." I had to agree, Potter looked like the living dead, tiny bits of pallid skin standing out starkly against red blood.
"Never underestimate your enemies, Malfoy! You made my life hell now I'm going to send you there!" He took a deep breath, "Avada Kedavra!" Lucius fell to the ground dead. Potter looked shocked before throwing himself through the almost-disappeared arch and passing out on the hallway floor a bloody, broken mess.
"Exeunt." I reemerged from the pensieve shakily, my mind mulling over everything I had seen. The tortures that Potter had endured were so horrible that I felt extremely nauseous, and I only has to watch. How is he living now, having been through that? How can you, Harry? If this is too much for me- you were just a boy! No, I was wrong, you were never a boy. No boy could live through that, let alone stay sane. Once again the matter of Potter's sanity brought on a wave of uncertainty. How could one stay sane through all that? Even someone as strong as Harry… he was tortured emotionally, physically, mentally; a life time of pain in less then a month…As I finally grasped the immense scope of what Potter had gone through, a deep sorrow overcame me and I sank to the floor, my head wrapped in my hands.
"Never fair."
A.N.1: DOOOOONE!!! That chap is sooooo long, 13,324 words!!! Eep! I wish I could have broken it up … *blinks* I suppose I could have quite easily. Why didn't I think of that before? Arg! …damn. Oh well, it's done and even though I'm thoroughly unhappy with the end, I'm posting it anyway cause it's been forever since my last post! So sorry for the wait, but you can see why it took so long!
A.N.2: Yes I am evil, but don't say I didn't warn you!
A.N.3: Lamo excuses for the problems with this chap:
1. Lucius is probably not in character because I don't really know/ remember much about him! Sorry if any of you are LM fans and were disappointed!
2. Too evil? No such thing! But if you want to blame something… *looks around for something to blame* … blame them! *points to Mathew Good Band*
3. Long wait: It would have been out sooner, but last Monday (which I had previously planned to devote to this fic) I was majorly sick! Damn food poisoning. : P
4. The detachedness of Snape: I didn't like the pensieve format, I don't think it liked me. I was going to kill myself, having to repeat "fades to black" over and over again! I was really looking forward to writing this chap, but the pensieve format makes everyone so detached :P oh well, maybe I'll try again sometime with a more involved role for Snape… *evil grin*
5. Unrealisticalness of torture: Well I'm happy to say I've never been through the tortures that I put Harry through, so I don't know much about them. If you have been through them please feel free to correct me in your review and then promptly go see a psychiatrist.
6. F-ed up ANs: I'M SO TIRED OF WRITING!!!I need to take a nice short vacation… a day maybe without writing? Wait, noooo!!! I still have homework I haven't done! *sob* stupid responses. : P
One more thing, why does Voldie call Peter Pettigrew Wormtail? Wasn't that his marauder nickname? Is it so people don't find out that Pettigrew is really alive?
Okay there is more I could and probably should say, but I really have to get this up so I'll say it in the next chap ^_^
In case you were wondering about any of those spells that didn't sound familiar, I made 'em up using my little Latin-English dictionary! Yay! They are pretty crude and I know in the books the spells aren't exact Latin phrases, but this way it's simple for you to ascertain their meanings.
Fulminare: To strike with lightning
Perdo Lunea: Moonlight blast
Gladius Aspergo: sword spray
Manus Fragor: Hand explosion
Vigilo: to keep awake
Bacali Crus: crutches/ sticks/ staffs, leg (crude and lazy on my part, I know, but it does the job)
Evanesco: to disappear or vanish
Roborare: to strengthen
Appareo: to become visible
There it is! Happy Wink At J00? ^_^ I hope so! I got it up minutes before ff.net went down…but you didn't! *gasp* Oh no! that means the earliest I'll be able to read you next chap is tonight!
Thanks for Reviewing!:
RoseFairy: Thanks! I'm not sure about the transitions in this chap, but I think they're easier to follow, though they lack smoothness *shrug* oh well, you can't have it all ^^
Zardiphillian Beryllix: I'm glad ^^ and thank you very much for pointing that out! Hope the work better, what do you think?
Pinkmoon: Here ya go, as ordered! ^^
LegacyLady: Well thank you very much, that means a lot *grin* and I hope I can follow through on all those hints *smile*.
Saavik: *smiles at the thought of people bowing to her* Glad you liked it! I hope to and probably will put another Harry-Sev mental chat in there somewhere ^^ I love 'em too! *grin*
Cheshire: Eep! Don't kill my fic! Please? It's just I think some of these reviewers might kill you, lol. I'm glad you love it and I'll try to make it 6 chapters soon!
Spongebob: "I go! I go! See how I go!" (lol, Puck from A Midsummer Night's Dream)
Mistress Cresacre: Yay, I'm so glad! All your questions will be answered soon… I hope -_-() Here ya go! *points to chapter*
iluvbadboys1313: Yup! The old geezer's dead! He'd be pushing up daisies if he weren't nailed to the perch! (sorry, little Monty Python humour, couldn't help myself ^^) anyway, remember that terminal illness, I know, I know, sneaky but hey, why not? "baffling thing"? *scratches head* I don't know… but if you want to ask again with more detail maybe I'll be able to remember something from my own story *hits head* -_-() anyway, thanks for reviewing!
Prophetess Of Hearts: *blink* *blink* … wow. You looked quite deep, eh? You sure you're not Poirot in disguise? That's amazing! I knew I was leaving hints but I didn't think anyone would really get to the bottom of them! You looked deeper into the Lupin thing then even I did! Can't promise anything, but you're right that there should be something there… hmm, we'll see what I can come up with!
Wink At J00: *Smiles really really really widely* THANKS!! Ehhehehe!! We're both cool! Yay! Lol! That's so cool! You say 'oh Merlin'! cool! I'm gonna do that at school! My friends will be scared, but it'll be worth it to see the looks on their faces! Yippee! YAY! That was the most enthusiastic review for this chap! You get a cookie! *hands Wink At J00 a yummy chocolat chip cookie* *vbg* Thaks!!
(by the way, I think your To Begin is going really well so far *grin* but you REALLY need to post MORE!! He he!)
Deity: Thanks! Glad you love it! Hope you like what happened next!
Please Review!!