The funniest story on Earth
Chapter three | Rei's confession
"No! DON'T TOUCH ME!!!" Rei ordered Vegeta. He paid no attention and resumed wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "What is your name woman?" he asked her as he looked for somebody to marry them against their will. "Gertrude" Rei lied. "*Gurtrude*...?" he said, bewildered. "Who would name there child *Gurtrude*?" "My mom maybe...?" Vegeta gave her a very odd look and continued his search. "Ah ha! Found one." he said aloud, just before he sneezed. "Our wedding is gonna be on every channel in the world!" Rei, oops, Gurtrude* almost fell out of the chair. WHAT!! NO! I WON'T HAVE IT! I WON'T!" she erupted almost making Vegeta go deaf. "WE'RE GETTING MARRIED RIGHT NOW!!" he hollered at her. He grabbed her arm and flew off to the church. "Marry us now! I want to rule." he barked at the priest.
"Look! Rei's on TV with that Vegeta guy! Lets go save her!" Mina suddenly yelled, scaring every one there. "God Mina, tell the world!" Setsuna said, annoyed. "I wonder where Serena is. . ." Haruka wondered sitting in the appartment couch. Just then, Serena walked through the door. Every one's head turned. "What happened, Serena!?" Michiru asked her. " Was attacked by the brother of Dariens computer, then I was almost mollested by this guy." "What do you mean, *almost*?" Lita wanted to know. "I looked at a tree and had an idea. I thought if he thought I was a crazy person he wouldn't molest me. So I broke free from his grasp and started running into the tree while singing 'Yankee Doodle' continuously. It was like, 'Yankee Doodle-boosh!- went to town-boosh! riding on a-boosh! pony-boosh!'" Serena explained. "Yep, that's out future queen." Mina said blankly.
By now the scouts where there at the church. "You can't love me, Vegeta! AND I CERTAINLY CAN'T LOVE YOU!!" Rei yelled in front of every one. "AND WHY NOT??" Vegeta hollered back. Rei pondered if she should tell the worled. should I tell the world? ... If it'll get him to leave me alone, then I'll tell the world! "Because I'm a lesbian!!" Every one gasped. Then Sailor Uranus turns to Neptune. "I don't love you. I have secretly loved Rei. Goodbye." Uranus broke Neptunes heart. "Rei!! I LOVE YOU!" Uranus yelled to Rei as she unmorphed. Rei's eyes widened then almost instantly filled with tears. "And I love you!!" she answered with her arms wide open to her. The others didn't know what to think. They where happy that they had found true love but, ewww. They just didn't know what hit them. Every one's gone nuts. Then, Jupiter says something, drounded out by Rei and Haruka'a loud love making. "What was that? I can't hear you over the two love birds and Neptunes bawling!" Sailor Moon shouted. "I said I wanna be Gothic!" Jupiter replied. Venus just gave her a you-are-so-totally-weird look and said "okay..." then turned to Serena. "Wanna join in the weirdness and go les too?" "Why not." Serena said as she unmorphed. "Wait. Do you heat it?" Lita asked. "Hear what?" Mina said also unmorphing. "It sounds like the hovoring of-" Lita trailed off. "Of what?" Serena demanded. "Flying purple marshmallow monkeys." Lita said, eyes as big as saucers.
~ยค~
Ok! That's cappy three! Do you like it? Do you wanna know what 'flying purple marshmallow monkeys' are? Find out in chapter 4! Updates soon!!