April 15th, 2004
Randi went into her jewelry box and pulled out her mother's necklace. She stared at it.
"Dave?" She asked.
"What?" Dave called out from the bathroom as he shaved.
"You still count Aaron as your son right?" She asked. Dave looked at himself in the mirror and put his razor down.
"Of course." He said as he walked into the bedroom.
"Then how come you never gave me an Aaron charm for my mother's necklace and how come you are so desperate for me to have a boy?" Randi asked. Dave stared at her. He had to choose his words carefully.
"I didn't think you'd want a charm for him." He said.
"He's my son isn't he?" Randi crossed her arms.
"Yes...What month charm was I suppose to get you? It's not like he was born. He died." Save said. Aaron had always been a sore subject for him.
"He left my body in June. He went to Heaven on June 8th, 2001. That's the month his charm should be." Randi said.
"Why are you so.... So upset by this right now?" Dave asked.
"I don't want him to be forgotten." She said.
"There's a memorial garden out back and a memorial at the graveyard. He won't be forgotten." Dave said.
"I know, it's just...Ireland is in a big girl bed, she uses the potty, she's so independent, and I cant help but to think that there should be another one. Aaron should be in a big boy bed, he should be using the potty..." Randi closed her eyes, "Did you know Ireland talks to him?"
"She talks to Aaron?" Dave asked. He found that disturbing somewhat. Randi nodded.
"I find her sitting on her bed talking to the air. She keeps saying 'We can' 'We will'." Randi said, "I've asked her why she talked to him and she said because she misses him." Dave could feel a sting in his heart.
"How can she miss him? She's never met him."
"She's a twin, Dave. As much as we try to forget that, she and Aaron are twins. They have a special bond together. They were together for a short time, but they were together." Dave stared at his wife. "I know how much loosing Aaron hurt me, but for Ireland, his twin, I can only imagine the pain is much worse."
"I don't want her to be in pain. She's only two." Dave shrugged. Randi shrugged.
"Maybe she's made peace. I don't know." She said, "You go get that shaving cream off of your face." Dave nodded and walked back into the bathroom. He had no idea all of this was going on in his house. Why was that?
* * *
Dave walked quietly into Irelands bedroom. She was sitting in front of her dollhouse, rocking the miniature baby in its crib. She was humming quietly. Dave smiled as he sat on her bed.
"Hi pumpkin." He said.
"Hi Daddy." Ireland smiled, Dave patted his lap.
"Come and sit on daddy's lap. I want to talk." Ireland nodded and climbed onto Dave's lap. "Do you know who Aaron is?" Ireland nodded again.
"My Brudda." Dave smiled softly.
"Yeah. Your brother." He said. "He's Lyric's brother too, but you and Aaron are a different kind of brother and sister. You're twins."
"I know." Ireland said.
"You know?" Dave smiled slightly, "Who told you?"
"Airwon." She said. Dave looked at her.
"Do you talk to Aaron a lot?" He asked. She nodded.
"Yeah." She said with a sigh, "Play now?"
"Sure. Go play." Ireland smiled and jumped off of his lap. Dave sat there and watched Ireland. She did seem to be at peace. Maybe it was because she was two years old. Maybe when she got old enough to know what death was, to know what miscarriage was; she'd ask more questions.
May 1st, 2004
Dave had been thinking a lot more about Aaron the past couple of weeks. Maybe because it was almost the third anniversary of loosing him. Maybe it was because Randi had made him think o f Aaron in a new light. Dave sat on the back porch. Lyric and Ireland were both playing in their sandbox. Randi stared at Dave as she stepped out onto the porch. She burst out laughing.
"You're whittling, Dave." She said, "Why are you witting?"
"Because I feel like it." He said.
"I didn't know that you knew how to whittle." She said.
"I do know how to whittle." Dave smiled blowing on his piece of wood.
"What are you making?" She asked.
"New dolls for Irelands dollhouse." He said, "This is Aaron." Randi smiled softly as Dave showed her the figure. The piece of wood was starting to look like a human. She could see arms and legs and some features of the face.
"Are these angel wings?" She asked. Dave nodded.
"Yup." Dave smiled, "I already have Ireland done." He picked up the small wooden girl. Randi grinned brightly.
"Oh Dave!" She giggled, "Why didn't you tell me you were making these?" Dave shrugged.
"Didn't think it mattered." Randi inspected the wooden Ireland.
"You're so talented. I wish I could do something cool." She said.
"You only design and make clothes." Dave chuckled blowing the dust off of Aaron wings.
"You know what I mean." She said, "How long did it take to do Ireland?"
"About two hours." He said, "Aaron will be like two and a half. Lyric will probably be an hour." Randi nodded.
"And me?"
"Oh I don't know. It's going to be hard to make a goddess. Might take days." Dave said.
"Very funny." Randi said as she sat on Dave's lap. "Will Mommy be anatomically correct?" Dave chuckled.
"Well…I can make a couple of…atomically correct Mommy and Daddy dolls after I finish these." Dave winked.
"Mommy likes." Randi kissed Dave softly, "Mommy really likes." Dave smiled against her lips.
"You think the kids will be okay alone while we race upstairs?" Dave smiled as he ran his hands up her back. Randi giggled and shook her head.
"No. They could eat a pound of sand or fall off of the jungle gym." Randi said. Dave sighed slightly.
"Well, they're going to bed in four hours anyway." Dave looked up at his wife. She smiled back down at him.
"Why don't you get back to whittling." She said, "Ireland will love these."
"I hope so." He said, "You can paint the wooden Ireland if you want. Paints are on the picnic table."
"Cool." Randi grabbed the wooden Ireland and sat at the picnic table. "These paints are safe if Ireland puts the dolls in her mouth right?" Randi asked.
"Of course." Dave said. "I'm not an idiot."
"I didn't say you were." Randi chuckled. She looked down at her girls, who were still playing in the sand. Randi smiled softly. Dave had certainly captured Ireland's features perfectly. "I still can't believe you whittle."
"Get used to it sweetheart. There are a lot of things that you don't know about me." Dave gave her a playful wink.
"There are a lot of things I don't know about you? Like what?"
"I like anal sex." Dave said. Randi burst out laughing.
"Oh I know that about you." She said, "What else?"
"Let's see. My favourite colour is blue." He said.
"Try again." She chuckled.
"The scar on my hip I didn't get when I was over seas." He said.
"How did you get it?" Randi chuckled. Dave smiled.
"In my old neighborhood there was a junk yard. My friends and I decided to go in one day after school and take some things to make a tree house with." Dave said as he finished Aaron's wings. "I had found the best tire for a tire swing, of course it was on top of a pile of junk. So, I climbed up, but I didn't make it all the way. When I hit the ground there was a piece of metal stuck on my hip. My buddies bolted thinking that I was dead." Randi giggled.
"That's terrible Dave." She smiled.
"I know but I learned to never climb up a pile of junk." He said. "That's a good life lesson." Randi smiled.
"Yes. It certainly was." Dave said looking up. Randi looked so adorable as she concentrated on painting Ireland's pink dress. In a couple of years, Dave would have to make new wooden children as his real children grew. He didn't mind. This was something that relaxed him, even though Randi liked to tease.