Heartbeats (Part 5 - The Heart is an Irrational Hunter)
By Valma
"Whatcha' watching?"
Niles had wandered into the TV room drawn in by the sound of voices and occasional chord of organ music. He found his mother-in-law propped up on the couch with a glass of scotch in one hand and a bowl of finger snacks in her lap, deeply involved a television program of some sort. Tired of reading his dog-eared copy of Flaubert's "Madame Bovary", his exercises long taken care of, he just wanted some human contact, what with Daphne being out shopping for groceries.
"If I make a concerted effort, I could use this opportunity of forced confinement to improve my relations with Gertie," he reasoned. "And there will be the added bonus that if we get along better, one more element of stress in my life will have disappeared."
"Me soaps," Mum Moon curtly informed him not bothering to turn her head.
"Mind if I join you?" Niles proffered cautiously sidling up closer until his hands rested on the back of the sofa.
"Suit yourself," she shrugged and continued to devour the morsels of food from the dish.
Seeing how that was likely the best invitation available, he perched himself on the opposite end of the couch like he was maintaining his balance on a teeter-totter. Even without looking, he could feel her eyeballing him with a certain amount of suspicion. Undeterred, Niles gathered up his courage and plunged into the unknown waters of striking up a conversation with Daphne's mum.
"Soooo --- what's happening in the story so far," he bravely inquired.
"How can I tell with someone chatterin' in me ear during the show?" Gertrude snapped.
This wasn't going to be easy. Niles sighed and leaned back against the cushion. Gertrude wasn't the most agreeable of people. He waited until the commercials came on and then redoubled his valiant efforts to be genial.
"It's amazing how complex the plots of these stories are," he offered. "Gertrude, you must have to have a remarkable memory to keep all the characters and their various exploits straight."
"Why --- thank you, Niles," she stammered slightly taken aback. "I --- I guess it does require an effort to keep up with everyone's story."
"Well, bravo!" he continued extending his verbal olive branch as far as he dared. "I knew you would be the perfect person to help me understand the entanglements of the plot. I can see it is reminiscent of the Italian or French 'Commedia del'Arte', but I need a guide, someone to escort me along through the intricate and enigmatic passages of the story."
"Let me get this straight," Gertie confirmed. "You --- want me --- to help --- you understand 'The Young and the Restless'?"
"Yes."
"You? Mister hoity-toity,'I know everything about literature and then some', wants to learn from --- from me, Gertrude Moon."
"You are the master, I am your humble student," Niles reassured her, bowing his head as a sign of his sincerity.
"All right --- in that case, I'd be happy to oblige you Niles," Gertie finally conceded. "And who knows, if this works out, then maybe I'll give you some pointers on improving your poker game."
Niles smiled and shrugged, "Who knows where our new found amiability will lead?" This was going to be easier than it first appeared. It would be a virtual cakewalk in comparison to the schooling of sycophancy that he had graduated from under Maris' tutelage. "I could learn all sorts of things from you. I've decided that life is too short to just view it from one angle all the time. I want to broaden my world and what better place to start than in my very own home --- right now --- here with you."
"I guess that operation of yours really did more good than I imagined," Gertie mused.
"Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship," Niles quipped.
Gertrude looked puzzled at him, but was obviously starting to soften under his charm and flattery.
"It's from the movie 'Casablanca'," Niles offered by way of an explanation.
"Oh," she said as she took another large sip of her drink, "Well must warn you, I don't like foreign films. Now, about our program --- you see that fellow? He's the head doctor. His girlfriend is Ashley, who is in a coma and --- "
When Daphne came home she thought it was "kind of cute", the two of them sitting on the couch together, Niles nodding earnestly, while her mum, relishing her new found role as his teacher, explained patiently the twists and turns of the program's plot. At least it was a beginning - he was out of his pajamas finally, up and about on his own accord, instead of isolating himself in the guest bedroom, hiding from the world. It might be an indication that he was ready to re-join the world of the "living".
By the end of the week however, Daphne's initial delight at seeing Niles watch soap operas with her mother, had turned into more misgiving. She began to realize that he was merely substituting one rut for another. Watching endless daytime dramas on television was just another way of Niles avoiding real life.
Although he pontificated endlessly about how grateful he was that he had been spared the grim reaper's scythe, what a blessing each new dawning day was and that he was "going to make the most of it", she began to notice a disturbing pattern emerging as the weeks went by. While he was diligent about doing his exercises and sticking to his post-operative regimen, he seemed to be satisfied to live vicariously through others, keeping everything at an arm's length, so that he minimized any direct physical or emotional risk to himself. He wouldn't entertain any thought of returning to his office or even looking at his patient files. He wouldn't leave the house unless she went with him. It had been weeks since the doctor had cleared him to return to a more normal diet, but Niles insisted on eating only the blandest of foods. His chest bone was healing remarkably now, but still he refused to drive his car or play squash with his uncharacteristically but remarkably tolerant brother.
And the most worrisome thing of all was that he seemed to be less and less interested in any type of intimate contact as time passed. He was profusely affectionate in some ways, hugging her, stroking her back constantly, clinging to her if they went out for a walk like a two year old child, finding almost any excuse to reach out and touch her. He even had begun regularly sniffing her hair again, something he only did occasionally since they were married. But whenever she tried to stimulate any deeper sexual curiosity in him, she would hit a roadblock. He'd initially respond with excitement but then, inevitably, he would back off before anything really developed. Never was this made more abundantly clear to her than one day, a few weeks after he came home, in the Café Nervosa. He definitely seemed aroused when she purposely teased him with an image of "Nurse Naughty" ministering to his every desire, but cast aside her enticing offer only a few minutes later with a strained "let's wait and see until after my stress test". The examination came and went, and he was given a clean bill of health, but Niles still refused to give in to his very obvious feelings of passions for her.
Daphne grew more anxious about his lack of intimacy as a few weeks dragged into almost two months.
"I know he's scared, but if he doesn't have a breakthrough soon, I'll have to take matters into me own hands," she concluded one long, lonely night while watching an infomercial on television. "Whatever fears that are holding him back, must be very powerful ones indeed. But I also know he loves me. And I love him, so I'll be patient. If I pressure him too soon, he just may panic about it and that wouldn't do any good at all."
Daphne drew her knees up close to her chest and rocked back and forth, starring blankly at the fuzzy reception on the screen after the national anthem had run its course.
Something was about to give way and it was either going to be her sanity or Niles' fears. One thing was certain - the status quo was about to change.
Daphne rolled over lazily and opened her eyes. The morning light was just beginning to permeate the room. A gentle snuffling sound issued forth from the blankets beside her. Reaching out, she pushed back the bedcoverings and lightly grazed her fingers along Niles' angular jaw tickling him in the process. His eyes remained shut, but his nose twitched in response to her touch. A spontaneous smile slowly spread across his face as he moved instinctively closer to her reclining form until he was snuggled up in her arms.
Something was digging into her back. Daphne reached around behind her and pulled at the offending object --- a stethoscope. She chuckled out loud. "Nurse Naughty"'s tools of the trade were never utilized quite in the way that she had employed them last night!
Although her scheme for using her "feminine wiles" wasn't the motivator she had planned, it still had come in handy during the ensuing evening.
And what a night they had!
Daphne was glad that the music she had selected was one of Niles' favourites - he called it his "Wagner for Lovers" CD. She giggled, remembering the look on his face when he heard the first strains of the instruments. It harmonized perfectly with the burning rapture in his eyes. Everyone always saw just the prim and proper Niles, the anal-retentive erudite man in the expensive Armani suit. But he could be very spontaneous and playful when they were alone together. She recalled his erotic humour about hitting the "high notes" and how he would take her on a real "Ride of the Valkyries". She knew he savored every sensual moment of their lovemaking. She could feel him absorbing every fragrance, every sight, sound and touch of her. All the pent up emotions that he had been suppressing recently burst forth with an unflagging fervor that left them both exhausted at the evening's end.
She loved the way his attentive fingers stroked her willing flesh, the manner in which his adventurous lips mapped out hidden delights on her body. He used his tongue like the flickering flame of a candle, igniting a continual firestorm of ardent appetite within her.
Just thinking about the ecstasy she had experienced left her trembling.
Niles squeezed her tighter, embracing her naked body with his leg.
"Are you cold, darling?" he asked sleepily as he finally opened his eyes. He pressed his lips against her cheek and kissed her sweetly.
"No," she replied. "I've never been warmer in my entire life."
She nuzzled his chin gently. Her fingers playfully stroked the soft mat of hair that had already started to grow back on his chest. Carefully she outlined the periphery of his scar --- slowly, deliberately like she was a blind person trying to gain as much information as possible with one pass of her hand.
"I adore you so much, Niles," she finally said, breaking the silence. "Let's both of us promise never to let anything ever come between our love again."
He looked at her with watery eyes.
"I am so sorry," his voice shook as he spoke. "Thank goodness Dad gave me that little speech last night. Who knows how long I would have allowed my apprehensions control my life? I can't believe I treated you so --- so --- Daphne --- Daphne, can you every forgive me?"
She leaned back and placed her finger over his lips.
"Remember, before we got married and we decided to let each other have one irrational demand?" She waited until he nodded in agreement before continuing, "Well, you used yours up pretty quickly if I recall?" Again he bobbed his head humbly without a sound. "Now it's my turn, Niles and my irrational demand is that we don't ever speak of attaching any blame to this --- ever. All right? I don't want you feeling guilty about what you did. I understand fully why you acted the way that you did and I also know the terror you felt was genuine --- so there isn't any use assigning culpability on just one person. I could have been more open with you too -- - I should have told you about how I felt. You weren't the only one keeping your feelings bottled up. So we'll just call it even and move on from there --- O.K.?"
An expression of pure serenity crossed his face.
"Yes boss," he said at last with a sly smile.
"It's Nurse Naughty to you, " she laughed. "Now let's get up and prepare some breakfast --- what would you like?"
"Bangers and mash," he announced suggestively.
Daphne's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"Too fattening," she decreed. "And you hate sausages."
"How about if you just butter my buns then." he teased, straddling her body while he spoke.
Daphne giggled.
"Is all you can think about this morning is sex, Niles Crane?" she exclaimed.
"Noooo --- I'm --- thinking about --- music too," he professed reaching over and flicking on the CD player. "Let's do a repeat performance of the Prelude from Tristan and Isolde."
The voluptuous music undulated over them like an orgasmic tide rushing to the shore.
"Play on Maestro," concurred Daphne with a grin, pulling Niles down until she could feel his heart beating strongly against her breasts and they melted into a state of bliss. "Play on!"
The End
By Valma
"Whatcha' watching?"
Niles had wandered into the TV room drawn in by the sound of voices and occasional chord of organ music. He found his mother-in-law propped up on the couch with a glass of scotch in one hand and a bowl of finger snacks in her lap, deeply involved a television program of some sort. Tired of reading his dog-eared copy of Flaubert's "Madame Bovary", his exercises long taken care of, he just wanted some human contact, what with Daphne being out shopping for groceries.
"If I make a concerted effort, I could use this opportunity of forced confinement to improve my relations with Gertie," he reasoned. "And there will be the added bonus that if we get along better, one more element of stress in my life will have disappeared."
"Me soaps," Mum Moon curtly informed him not bothering to turn her head.
"Mind if I join you?" Niles proffered cautiously sidling up closer until his hands rested on the back of the sofa.
"Suit yourself," she shrugged and continued to devour the morsels of food from the dish.
Seeing how that was likely the best invitation available, he perched himself on the opposite end of the couch like he was maintaining his balance on a teeter-totter. Even without looking, he could feel her eyeballing him with a certain amount of suspicion. Undeterred, Niles gathered up his courage and plunged into the unknown waters of striking up a conversation with Daphne's mum.
"Soooo --- what's happening in the story so far," he bravely inquired.
"How can I tell with someone chatterin' in me ear during the show?" Gertrude snapped.
This wasn't going to be easy. Niles sighed and leaned back against the cushion. Gertrude wasn't the most agreeable of people. He waited until the commercials came on and then redoubled his valiant efforts to be genial.
"It's amazing how complex the plots of these stories are," he offered. "Gertrude, you must have to have a remarkable memory to keep all the characters and their various exploits straight."
"Why --- thank you, Niles," she stammered slightly taken aback. "I --- I guess it does require an effort to keep up with everyone's story."
"Well, bravo!" he continued extending his verbal olive branch as far as he dared. "I knew you would be the perfect person to help me understand the entanglements of the plot. I can see it is reminiscent of the Italian or French 'Commedia del'Arte', but I need a guide, someone to escort me along through the intricate and enigmatic passages of the story."
"Let me get this straight," Gertie confirmed. "You --- want me --- to help --- you understand 'The Young and the Restless'?"
"Yes."
"You? Mister hoity-toity,'I know everything about literature and then some', wants to learn from --- from me, Gertrude Moon."
"You are the master, I am your humble student," Niles reassured her, bowing his head as a sign of his sincerity.
"All right --- in that case, I'd be happy to oblige you Niles," Gertie finally conceded. "And who knows, if this works out, then maybe I'll give you some pointers on improving your poker game."
Niles smiled and shrugged, "Who knows where our new found amiability will lead?" This was going to be easier than it first appeared. It would be a virtual cakewalk in comparison to the schooling of sycophancy that he had graduated from under Maris' tutelage. "I could learn all sorts of things from you. I've decided that life is too short to just view it from one angle all the time. I want to broaden my world and what better place to start than in my very own home --- right now --- here with you."
"I guess that operation of yours really did more good than I imagined," Gertie mused.
"Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship," Niles quipped.
Gertrude looked puzzled at him, but was obviously starting to soften under his charm and flattery.
"It's from the movie 'Casablanca'," Niles offered by way of an explanation.
"Oh," she said as she took another large sip of her drink, "Well must warn you, I don't like foreign films. Now, about our program --- you see that fellow? He's the head doctor. His girlfriend is Ashley, who is in a coma and --- "
When Daphne came home she thought it was "kind of cute", the two of them sitting on the couch together, Niles nodding earnestly, while her mum, relishing her new found role as his teacher, explained patiently the twists and turns of the program's plot. At least it was a beginning - he was out of his pajamas finally, up and about on his own accord, instead of isolating himself in the guest bedroom, hiding from the world. It might be an indication that he was ready to re-join the world of the "living".
By the end of the week however, Daphne's initial delight at seeing Niles watch soap operas with her mother, had turned into more misgiving. She began to realize that he was merely substituting one rut for another. Watching endless daytime dramas on television was just another way of Niles avoiding real life.
Although he pontificated endlessly about how grateful he was that he had been spared the grim reaper's scythe, what a blessing each new dawning day was and that he was "going to make the most of it", she began to notice a disturbing pattern emerging as the weeks went by. While he was diligent about doing his exercises and sticking to his post-operative regimen, he seemed to be satisfied to live vicariously through others, keeping everything at an arm's length, so that he minimized any direct physical or emotional risk to himself. He wouldn't entertain any thought of returning to his office or even looking at his patient files. He wouldn't leave the house unless she went with him. It had been weeks since the doctor had cleared him to return to a more normal diet, but Niles insisted on eating only the blandest of foods. His chest bone was healing remarkably now, but still he refused to drive his car or play squash with his uncharacteristically but remarkably tolerant brother.
And the most worrisome thing of all was that he seemed to be less and less interested in any type of intimate contact as time passed. He was profusely affectionate in some ways, hugging her, stroking her back constantly, clinging to her if they went out for a walk like a two year old child, finding almost any excuse to reach out and touch her. He even had begun regularly sniffing her hair again, something he only did occasionally since they were married. But whenever she tried to stimulate any deeper sexual curiosity in him, she would hit a roadblock. He'd initially respond with excitement but then, inevitably, he would back off before anything really developed. Never was this made more abundantly clear to her than one day, a few weeks after he came home, in the Café Nervosa. He definitely seemed aroused when she purposely teased him with an image of "Nurse Naughty" ministering to his every desire, but cast aside her enticing offer only a few minutes later with a strained "let's wait and see until after my stress test". The examination came and went, and he was given a clean bill of health, but Niles still refused to give in to his very obvious feelings of passions for her.
Daphne grew more anxious about his lack of intimacy as a few weeks dragged into almost two months.
"I know he's scared, but if he doesn't have a breakthrough soon, I'll have to take matters into me own hands," she concluded one long, lonely night while watching an infomercial on television. "Whatever fears that are holding him back, must be very powerful ones indeed. But I also know he loves me. And I love him, so I'll be patient. If I pressure him too soon, he just may panic about it and that wouldn't do any good at all."
Daphne drew her knees up close to her chest and rocked back and forth, starring blankly at the fuzzy reception on the screen after the national anthem had run its course.
Something was about to give way and it was either going to be her sanity or Niles' fears. One thing was certain - the status quo was about to change.
Daphne rolled over lazily and opened her eyes. The morning light was just beginning to permeate the room. A gentle snuffling sound issued forth from the blankets beside her. Reaching out, she pushed back the bedcoverings and lightly grazed her fingers along Niles' angular jaw tickling him in the process. His eyes remained shut, but his nose twitched in response to her touch. A spontaneous smile slowly spread across his face as he moved instinctively closer to her reclining form until he was snuggled up in her arms.
Something was digging into her back. Daphne reached around behind her and pulled at the offending object --- a stethoscope. She chuckled out loud. "Nurse Naughty"'s tools of the trade were never utilized quite in the way that she had employed them last night!
Although her scheme for using her "feminine wiles" wasn't the motivator she had planned, it still had come in handy during the ensuing evening.
And what a night they had!
Daphne was glad that the music she had selected was one of Niles' favourites - he called it his "Wagner for Lovers" CD. She giggled, remembering the look on his face when he heard the first strains of the instruments. It harmonized perfectly with the burning rapture in his eyes. Everyone always saw just the prim and proper Niles, the anal-retentive erudite man in the expensive Armani suit. But he could be very spontaneous and playful when they were alone together. She recalled his erotic humour about hitting the "high notes" and how he would take her on a real "Ride of the Valkyries". She knew he savored every sensual moment of their lovemaking. She could feel him absorbing every fragrance, every sight, sound and touch of her. All the pent up emotions that he had been suppressing recently burst forth with an unflagging fervor that left them both exhausted at the evening's end.
She loved the way his attentive fingers stroked her willing flesh, the manner in which his adventurous lips mapped out hidden delights on her body. He used his tongue like the flickering flame of a candle, igniting a continual firestorm of ardent appetite within her.
Just thinking about the ecstasy she had experienced left her trembling.
Niles squeezed her tighter, embracing her naked body with his leg.
"Are you cold, darling?" he asked sleepily as he finally opened his eyes. He pressed his lips against her cheek and kissed her sweetly.
"No," she replied. "I've never been warmer in my entire life."
She nuzzled his chin gently. Her fingers playfully stroked the soft mat of hair that had already started to grow back on his chest. Carefully she outlined the periphery of his scar --- slowly, deliberately like she was a blind person trying to gain as much information as possible with one pass of her hand.
"I adore you so much, Niles," she finally said, breaking the silence. "Let's both of us promise never to let anything ever come between our love again."
He looked at her with watery eyes.
"I am so sorry," his voice shook as he spoke. "Thank goodness Dad gave me that little speech last night. Who knows how long I would have allowed my apprehensions control my life? I can't believe I treated you so --- so --- Daphne --- Daphne, can you every forgive me?"
She leaned back and placed her finger over his lips.
"Remember, before we got married and we decided to let each other have one irrational demand?" She waited until he nodded in agreement before continuing, "Well, you used yours up pretty quickly if I recall?" Again he bobbed his head humbly without a sound. "Now it's my turn, Niles and my irrational demand is that we don't ever speak of attaching any blame to this --- ever. All right? I don't want you feeling guilty about what you did. I understand fully why you acted the way that you did and I also know the terror you felt was genuine --- so there isn't any use assigning culpability on just one person. I could have been more open with you too -- - I should have told you about how I felt. You weren't the only one keeping your feelings bottled up. So we'll just call it even and move on from there --- O.K.?"
An expression of pure serenity crossed his face.
"Yes boss," he said at last with a sly smile.
"It's Nurse Naughty to you, " she laughed. "Now let's get up and prepare some breakfast --- what would you like?"
"Bangers and mash," he announced suggestively.
Daphne's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"Too fattening," she decreed. "And you hate sausages."
"How about if you just butter my buns then." he teased, straddling her body while he spoke.
Daphne giggled.
"Is all you can think about this morning is sex, Niles Crane?" she exclaimed.
"Noooo --- I'm --- thinking about --- music too," he professed reaching over and flicking on the CD player. "Let's do a repeat performance of the Prelude from Tristan and Isolde."
The voluptuous music undulated over them like an orgasmic tide rushing to the shore.
"Play on Maestro," concurred Daphne with a grin, pulling Niles down until she could feel his heart beating strongly against her breasts and they melted into a state of bliss. "Play on!"
The End