Title: I Just Thought I'd Ask
By: MonkeyDonut
Rated: PG because nothing actually happens.
Disclaimer** - I don't own any of these characters, nor do I own the computer I wrote this on, nor am I paying for this computer connection. Please don't tell my boss.
Feedback: I live for your approval.
Summary: The Scoobies take on something different, leading to some unfortunate side-effects for Buffy and Cordelia; takes place on BtVS season 2 sometime before "Surprise."
/------------------------------------------------------------------/
Chapter 2: That Night, or Remind me to Never Help you Again
The moon was hanging rather lowly in the sky, as if it were peaking around to find something to watch. It was also shining quite brightly, mainly for the same reason. The moon was bored and needed entertainment. Its light spread down from space, through the atmosphere, cut through some confused looking clouds, and happened to find its way to Sunnydale. It looked around a bit, found a particularly interesting bit of cleared brush, and settled down on Lover's Lane. It noticed that it was a particularly slow night, with only one car, a Mercedes coupe, parked with a nice view. Since there was nothing else to look at, the moon shed its light on the two occupants of the car, who seemed to be pretty busy at the moment and probably wouldn't mind the intrusion.
Xander was enjoying himself immensely, but couldn't shake the fact that something was bothering him. He stopped what he was doing and looked around. "Man, the moon sure is bright tonight."
"Oh shut up and kiss me." This of course came from Cordelia, who despite her better judgement, was having a surprisingly good time at the moment, and wished to continue.
"My bad." Xander leaned back in and continued their embrace. He often wondered how Cordelia and he were able to stand each other long enough to get to these good parts of their quirky relationship. Then he remembered that these parts didn't require much talking, or thinking for that matter, so he stopped thinking and talking to himself and just enjoyed the moment. This particular moment lasted for quite some time.
It was only after a small blondish girl was thrown onto the hood of their car that they finally came up for air.
The figure rolled down and onto the ground, disappearing in front of the grill. A head quickly popped up and saw the faces of the two teenagers staring down at her in dismay.
"Hi, guys," said Buffy.
/-----------------------/
Buffy jumped to her feet and yelped, ducking just in time as a hand swung in front of her.
Odd, Xander thought; those hands have claws on them. Claws?!
The clawed fiend swung again at Buffy, this time too slowly, as Buffy caught its arm and used her leverage to flip it over and onto its back.
"Pardon the interruption, but it really wasn't my idea," Buffy said sarcastically. The demon grabbed for Buffy's leg, but she back-flipped out of the way, landing on her feet in full fighting stance. "Maybe if you guys had been paying a little more attention, you wouldn't be so surprised right now."
Giles came suddenly running out of the woods, carrying a sword and a brown satchel strapped over his right shoulder.
"Watch out, Buffy!" he yelled, just as the demon shot forward from the ground, clawed hands extended. Buffy easily avoided the creature by stepping to the side, but was struck unexpectedly by the demon's tail, which she had failed to notice altogether.
Buffy fell to the ground, landing on her side as the demon turned and snarled in her general direction.
"Shouldn't we get out and help?" asked Cordelia, knowing full well she wasn't going to. She was too busy worrying about how she was going to explain the large dent on the hood of her father's car; Buffy could take care of herself, but the car was another story.
"Already on it." Xander swung open the door and ran towards Giles, hoping he might have a spare weapon available. "Oh, crap." The demon had turned to face him as soon as Xander had run up, and now seemed to be his new target. Oh, I'm an idiot, he thought. At least this will give Buffy some time to recover while the demon chases me. Xander turned and ran, cursing his juvenile thoughts of grandeur and heroism.
Buffy stood up and fell back down again, feeling a little woozier than she should.
"Xander, be careful!" yelled Giles. "The Vrabel's tale is very poisonous!"
"Now he tells me," said Buffy dejectedly, as she finally got to her feet and rubbed the small of her back where the demon's tail had stung her. To Giles, "That information would probably have been a lot more useful BEFORE I got stung."
"Sorry, it took me a second to realize what kind of demon it was. Here, take this sword; you have to kill it by cutting off its stinger. Are you okay?"
"Which Giles wants to know?" Buffy's vision was slightly blurry now, but she was able to recognize the sight of a near-distant Xander trying at length to avoid the Vrabel's demon stinger.
Giles noticed Cordelia was still in her car, and an idea suddenly came to him. "Quick! Cordelia! Honk your horn!"
Cordelia leaned her head out of her open window and looked at Giles in confusion. "Why?"
"Look, just do it! Before Xander gets in serious trouble!"
Cordelia turned and looked towards Xander, and saw the creature gaining. "Okay," she said unassuredly.
She pushed down on the steering wheel button with great enthusiasm, igniting the gratuitously loud horn, which squelched and bleeped with equal enthusiasm. Still holding the button, Cordelia turned and yelled towards Giles.
"Why exactly am I doing this?"
"Because the Vrabel despise loud noises," Giles yelled above the din of the horn. "It most likely will distract the demon and stop it from eating Xander."
"Oh. That's good." Cordelia paused for a second. "Wait a minute. Exactly how much do they hate loud noises?"
"Well, quite a lot from the look on its face."
Cordelia turned to see the creature jump on the hood of the car and snarl directly at her, claws extended and scorpion-like stinger hanging, ready to strike. Its three rows of teeth were all displayed prominently, slobber dripping from its mouth, it's dark, scaly skin stretched tightly across its flattened forehead.
All of this caught Cordelia quite off guard, but she still managed to let out a blood-curdling scream. Her hands shook in front of her face, in that funny sort of way hands do when you're terrified and afraid for your life. Consequently, the horn was now silent, leaving the demon only slightly less annoyed at the car.
"Don't mind if I interrupt," said Buffy, still trying to get her bearings, "but I'm guessing that although I'm seeing three of you ugly demon things, there's only one here. So my hopes are that if I aim for the one in the middle..." She raised the sword above her head, the demon looking at her quizzically, "...I might just get lucky..."
Buffy swung the sword with all her might, striking the side of Cordelia's car and slicing the driver side mirror clean off.
"Or not," Buffy concluded, obviously dejected.
Cordelia saw what happened and managed to stop screaming long enough to yell out, "Oh great! My father's gonna kill me!"
"Good to know you're so concerned about the important things. . ." Buffy trailed off, collapsing on the ground with a look of exhaustion on her face. She fell quickly, very much unconscious, with the sword still in her grasp. The Vrabel saw that she had been injured by its stinger and looked for the kill. It jumped from the vehicle and landed on the ground, straddling Buffy, ready to strike and deal its deathblow.
"No!!!" It was all Xander could do to get there before the demon made its move. He jumped on the Vrabel's back and began to punch it in the back of its scaly head, providing little more than a distraction. The creature roared back and flung Xander off with its tail, narrowly missing him with the stinger. Xander landed roughly on the ground, shaken but not badly hurt. The Vrabel then returned its attention to Buffy.
It thrust its head down to bite, but was sideswiped by a car door, which couldn't have been opened at a better time by Cordelia. "Oops. Did I do that?"
She sprung from the Mercedes and ran towards Giles, who had since pulled a crossbow from his satchel and aimed it at the demon's head. It was dazed and unable to avoid the arrow that now headed in its direction, screaming with great pain as the point pierced its throat.
"Nice shot, Giles," complimented Cordelia.
"Quite. Uh, oh."
The creature, however, was less impressed and more pissed-off, and started towards them.
"Oh dear," Giles muttered as he tried desperately to reload the crossbow. He fumbled with his bag trying to find another arrow as Cordelia supported him in the only way Cordelia could.
"Oh, hurry hurry hurry. What's taking you so long for lord's sake!! Shoot it!!"
Xander had recovered from his toss and scrambled over to Buffy to try to wake her.
"Buffy?! Buffy!! Wake up, wake up!" Xander shook Buffy lightly as he tried to rouse the poisoned Slayer. "It's, um, kind of important that you NOT be unconscious right now." Buffy stirred slightly but showed no signs of consciousness.
The creature was moving rather methodically towards Giles and Cordelia, less worried about getting there and more interested in which one it was going to take down first. Giles fumbled with an arrow, locked it into the crossbow, and aimed with quick precision. He fired, sending the arrow towards the Vrabel. It ducked, the arrow just missing its head. The projectile zinged past the demon, flew through the air with great velocity and ease, finally striking Cordelia's car. It shattered the rear window before coming to rest, embedded in the back of the driver side headrest.
"Would everyone please STOP destroying my car?!"
"Um, right. Sorry. Perhaps it's best if we take this opportunity to, um, run." But it was too late. The Vrabel lept from twenty meters away, soared through the air and landed just in front the two, only a couple of feet separation between them.
Cordelia screamed as the creature roared. Its torso elongated and its mouth spread open, set to devour its prey.
It leaned back to strike, suddenly stopped, and let out a cry of anguish. It was frozen in strike position, becoming very still. It then fell in front of them, crashing into the ground, unmistakably and irrequivically dead. Buffy stood behind its fallen form, sword in hand, with the point of the blade dripping with the demon's blood. On the ground next to the creature lay its stinger, now very much separated from the rest of the tail.
"Is everyone alright?" asked Giles.
"I think so," answered Xander. "Buffy?"
"I think I'm okay."
"What about me?" quipped Cordelia. "My car is destroyed, my hair's a mess, and eww, there's icky demon blood all over my shoes. I hate you guys."
Xander smiled.
"Things couldn't get any worse."
Suddenly, Buffy's legs buckled. "Oh. I don't feel so good...." She collapsed, falling towards Cordelia. She tried to get out of the way, but wasn't fast enough. Buffy fell into Cordelia, sending them both sprawling on the ground. Cordelia's leg brushed the stinger, puncturing her thigh and sending a jolt through her body.
"Ow, that really hurt."
"Buffy!" Giles and Xander picked Buffy up, supporting her weight between them.
"Um, hello?! Xander!" Cordelia was sitting on the ground, seething.
"It's okay, I've got her." Giles held Buffy as Xander helped Cordelia up.
"I'm afraid that although the stinger wasn't lethal, it is poisonous and has some adverse side effects. We have to get Buffy home and into bed."
"Well, I don't think we can take my car, unless you don't mind sitting on broken glass. Besides, I'm not really up to driving with an arrow poking me in the back of my head." Cordelia brushed herself off and noticed the cut on her leg. "Oh great. Now I'm bleeding."
"You'll be okay. Buffy, on the otherhand, won't be if we don't get her someplace safe. She can ride in the passenger seat and Xander and I will be careful in the back."
"Why don't we take her to the hospital?" asked Xander as he helped Giles take Buffy to the car.
"They can't help her; I don't expect doctors would know how to treat a poisonous demon sting."
"Point taken."
"But I should be able to come up with some kind of cure once I consult my books," Giles added as they placed Buffy in the passenger seat.
Xander carefully brushed the glass off the back seat and got in with Giles. He noticed the arrow sticking out of the headrest and shook his head. He removed it and threw it out the open window.
"Oh," said Cordelia as she started the car. "What am I going to tell my dad? He's gonna kill me. Remind me to never help you again."
She put the car in drive and headed to Buffy's house, the moon sorry to see them go.
/----------------------/
A/N: So, anybody guessing where this is headed? I'll update soon, if anybody wants. Feedback please thank you your welcome no I insist okay fine.
By: MonkeyDonut
Rated: PG because nothing actually happens.
Disclaimer** - I don't own any of these characters, nor do I own the computer I wrote this on, nor am I paying for this computer connection. Please don't tell my boss.
Feedback: I live for your approval.
Summary: The Scoobies take on something different, leading to some unfortunate side-effects for Buffy and Cordelia; takes place on BtVS season 2 sometime before "Surprise."
/------------------------------------------------------------------/
Chapter 2: That Night, or Remind me to Never Help you Again
The moon was hanging rather lowly in the sky, as if it were peaking around to find something to watch. It was also shining quite brightly, mainly for the same reason. The moon was bored and needed entertainment. Its light spread down from space, through the atmosphere, cut through some confused looking clouds, and happened to find its way to Sunnydale. It looked around a bit, found a particularly interesting bit of cleared brush, and settled down on Lover's Lane. It noticed that it was a particularly slow night, with only one car, a Mercedes coupe, parked with a nice view. Since there was nothing else to look at, the moon shed its light on the two occupants of the car, who seemed to be pretty busy at the moment and probably wouldn't mind the intrusion.
Xander was enjoying himself immensely, but couldn't shake the fact that something was bothering him. He stopped what he was doing and looked around. "Man, the moon sure is bright tonight."
"Oh shut up and kiss me." This of course came from Cordelia, who despite her better judgement, was having a surprisingly good time at the moment, and wished to continue.
"My bad." Xander leaned back in and continued their embrace. He often wondered how Cordelia and he were able to stand each other long enough to get to these good parts of their quirky relationship. Then he remembered that these parts didn't require much talking, or thinking for that matter, so he stopped thinking and talking to himself and just enjoyed the moment. This particular moment lasted for quite some time.
It was only after a small blondish girl was thrown onto the hood of their car that they finally came up for air.
The figure rolled down and onto the ground, disappearing in front of the grill. A head quickly popped up and saw the faces of the two teenagers staring down at her in dismay.
"Hi, guys," said Buffy.
/-----------------------/
Buffy jumped to her feet and yelped, ducking just in time as a hand swung in front of her.
Odd, Xander thought; those hands have claws on them. Claws?!
The clawed fiend swung again at Buffy, this time too slowly, as Buffy caught its arm and used her leverage to flip it over and onto its back.
"Pardon the interruption, but it really wasn't my idea," Buffy said sarcastically. The demon grabbed for Buffy's leg, but she back-flipped out of the way, landing on her feet in full fighting stance. "Maybe if you guys had been paying a little more attention, you wouldn't be so surprised right now."
Giles came suddenly running out of the woods, carrying a sword and a brown satchel strapped over his right shoulder.
"Watch out, Buffy!" he yelled, just as the demon shot forward from the ground, clawed hands extended. Buffy easily avoided the creature by stepping to the side, but was struck unexpectedly by the demon's tail, which she had failed to notice altogether.
Buffy fell to the ground, landing on her side as the demon turned and snarled in her general direction.
"Shouldn't we get out and help?" asked Cordelia, knowing full well she wasn't going to. She was too busy worrying about how she was going to explain the large dent on the hood of her father's car; Buffy could take care of herself, but the car was another story.
"Already on it." Xander swung open the door and ran towards Giles, hoping he might have a spare weapon available. "Oh, crap." The demon had turned to face him as soon as Xander had run up, and now seemed to be his new target. Oh, I'm an idiot, he thought. At least this will give Buffy some time to recover while the demon chases me. Xander turned and ran, cursing his juvenile thoughts of grandeur and heroism.
Buffy stood up and fell back down again, feeling a little woozier than she should.
"Xander, be careful!" yelled Giles. "The Vrabel's tale is very poisonous!"
"Now he tells me," said Buffy dejectedly, as she finally got to her feet and rubbed the small of her back where the demon's tail had stung her. To Giles, "That information would probably have been a lot more useful BEFORE I got stung."
"Sorry, it took me a second to realize what kind of demon it was. Here, take this sword; you have to kill it by cutting off its stinger. Are you okay?"
"Which Giles wants to know?" Buffy's vision was slightly blurry now, but she was able to recognize the sight of a near-distant Xander trying at length to avoid the Vrabel's demon stinger.
Giles noticed Cordelia was still in her car, and an idea suddenly came to him. "Quick! Cordelia! Honk your horn!"
Cordelia leaned her head out of her open window and looked at Giles in confusion. "Why?"
"Look, just do it! Before Xander gets in serious trouble!"
Cordelia turned and looked towards Xander, and saw the creature gaining. "Okay," she said unassuredly.
She pushed down on the steering wheel button with great enthusiasm, igniting the gratuitously loud horn, which squelched and bleeped with equal enthusiasm. Still holding the button, Cordelia turned and yelled towards Giles.
"Why exactly am I doing this?"
"Because the Vrabel despise loud noises," Giles yelled above the din of the horn. "It most likely will distract the demon and stop it from eating Xander."
"Oh. That's good." Cordelia paused for a second. "Wait a minute. Exactly how much do they hate loud noises?"
"Well, quite a lot from the look on its face."
Cordelia turned to see the creature jump on the hood of the car and snarl directly at her, claws extended and scorpion-like stinger hanging, ready to strike. Its three rows of teeth were all displayed prominently, slobber dripping from its mouth, it's dark, scaly skin stretched tightly across its flattened forehead.
All of this caught Cordelia quite off guard, but she still managed to let out a blood-curdling scream. Her hands shook in front of her face, in that funny sort of way hands do when you're terrified and afraid for your life. Consequently, the horn was now silent, leaving the demon only slightly less annoyed at the car.
"Don't mind if I interrupt," said Buffy, still trying to get her bearings, "but I'm guessing that although I'm seeing three of you ugly demon things, there's only one here. So my hopes are that if I aim for the one in the middle..." She raised the sword above her head, the demon looking at her quizzically, "...I might just get lucky..."
Buffy swung the sword with all her might, striking the side of Cordelia's car and slicing the driver side mirror clean off.
"Or not," Buffy concluded, obviously dejected.
Cordelia saw what happened and managed to stop screaming long enough to yell out, "Oh great! My father's gonna kill me!"
"Good to know you're so concerned about the important things. . ." Buffy trailed off, collapsing on the ground with a look of exhaustion on her face. She fell quickly, very much unconscious, with the sword still in her grasp. The Vrabel saw that she had been injured by its stinger and looked for the kill. It jumped from the vehicle and landed on the ground, straddling Buffy, ready to strike and deal its deathblow.
"No!!!" It was all Xander could do to get there before the demon made its move. He jumped on the Vrabel's back and began to punch it in the back of its scaly head, providing little more than a distraction. The creature roared back and flung Xander off with its tail, narrowly missing him with the stinger. Xander landed roughly on the ground, shaken but not badly hurt. The Vrabel then returned its attention to Buffy.
It thrust its head down to bite, but was sideswiped by a car door, which couldn't have been opened at a better time by Cordelia. "Oops. Did I do that?"
She sprung from the Mercedes and ran towards Giles, who had since pulled a crossbow from his satchel and aimed it at the demon's head. It was dazed and unable to avoid the arrow that now headed in its direction, screaming with great pain as the point pierced its throat.
"Nice shot, Giles," complimented Cordelia.
"Quite. Uh, oh."
The creature, however, was less impressed and more pissed-off, and started towards them.
"Oh dear," Giles muttered as he tried desperately to reload the crossbow. He fumbled with his bag trying to find another arrow as Cordelia supported him in the only way Cordelia could.
"Oh, hurry hurry hurry. What's taking you so long for lord's sake!! Shoot it!!"
Xander had recovered from his toss and scrambled over to Buffy to try to wake her.
"Buffy?! Buffy!! Wake up, wake up!" Xander shook Buffy lightly as he tried to rouse the poisoned Slayer. "It's, um, kind of important that you NOT be unconscious right now." Buffy stirred slightly but showed no signs of consciousness.
The creature was moving rather methodically towards Giles and Cordelia, less worried about getting there and more interested in which one it was going to take down first. Giles fumbled with an arrow, locked it into the crossbow, and aimed with quick precision. He fired, sending the arrow towards the Vrabel. It ducked, the arrow just missing its head. The projectile zinged past the demon, flew through the air with great velocity and ease, finally striking Cordelia's car. It shattered the rear window before coming to rest, embedded in the back of the driver side headrest.
"Would everyone please STOP destroying my car?!"
"Um, right. Sorry. Perhaps it's best if we take this opportunity to, um, run." But it was too late. The Vrabel lept from twenty meters away, soared through the air and landed just in front the two, only a couple of feet separation between them.
Cordelia screamed as the creature roared. Its torso elongated and its mouth spread open, set to devour its prey.
It leaned back to strike, suddenly stopped, and let out a cry of anguish. It was frozen in strike position, becoming very still. It then fell in front of them, crashing into the ground, unmistakably and irrequivically dead. Buffy stood behind its fallen form, sword in hand, with the point of the blade dripping with the demon's blood. On the ground next to the creature lay its stinger, now very much separated from the rest of the tail.
"Is everyone alright?" asked Giles.
"I think so," answered Xander. "Buffy?"
"I think I'm okay."
"What about me?" quipped Cordelia. "My car is destroyed, my hair's a mess, and eww, there's icky demon blood all over my shoes. I hate you guys."
Xander smiled.
"Things couldn't get any worse."
Suddenly, Buffy's legs buckled. "Oh. I don't feel so good...." She collapsed, falling towards Cordelia. She tried to get out of the way, but wasn't fast enough. Buffy fell into Cordelia, sending them both sprawling on the ground. Cordelia's leg brushed the stinger, puncturing her thigh and sending a jolt through her body.
"Ow, that really hurt."
"Buffy!" Giles and Xander picked Buffy up, supporting her weight between them.
"Um, hello?! Xander!" Cordelia was sitting on the ground, seething.
"It's okay, I've got her." Giles held Buffy as Xander helped Cordelia up.
"I'm afraid that although the stinger wasn't lethal, it is poisonous and has some adverse side effects. We have to get Buffy home and into bed."
"Well, I don't think we can take my car, unless you don't mind sitting on broken glass. Besides, I'm not really up to driving with an arrow poking me in the back of my head." Cordelia brushed herself off and noticed the cut on her leg. "Oh great. Now I'm bleeding."
"You'll be okay. Buffy, on the otherhand, won't be if we don't get her someplace safe. She can ride in the passenger seat and Xander and I will be careful in the back."
"Why don't we take her to the hospital?" asked Xander as he helped Giles take Buffy to the car.
"They can't help her; I don't expect doctors would know how to treat a poisonous demon sting."
"Point taken."
"But I should be able to come up with some kind of cure once I consult my books," Giles added as they placed Buffy in the passenger seat.
Xander carefully brushed the glass off the back seat and got in with Giles. He noticed the arrow sticking out of the headrest and shook his head. He removed it and threw it out the open window.
"Oh," said Cordelia as she started the car. "What am I going to tell my dad? He's gonna kill me. Remind me to never help you again."
She put the car in drive and headed to Buffy's house, the moon sorry to see them go.
/----------------------/
A/N: So, anybody guessing where this is headed? I'll update soon, if anybody wants. Feedback please thank you your welcome no I insist okay fine.