A/N: Um… It took me a long time to getting around to writing this chapter. Um. I'm sorry? I mostly tried to avoid it because I can't write action. I don't like to, and I'm not good at it… So I'm sorry that part of the story isn't very good… But yay. Now I have it out of the way for at least a couple of chapters. Maybe I'll work on this more now because I'm not dreading it. Who knows? Be good peeps.
Chapter 4 – Lost & Found
"How could I leave her to get hurt AGAIN?" Spike muttered as he ran through the cemetery, looking for Dawn. "I could have walked her home or something. I can't believe-"
-----------------
"That I'm going back there!" Buffy muttered to herself as she made her way back to the cemetery. "How's it gonna be this time? It's got to be better than before. 'Oh, ello Buffy. I know I tried to rape you, but here's a bloody cookie. Forgive me?' 'Yes Spike, and may I say, you look sexy with your hair like that.'" Buffy finished, slapping one hand over her forehead and eyes in disbelief over her past exchange with the vamp.
"What's next? 'You know… Last night I stripped you naked and rubbed Neosporin seductively all over your flesh… want to buy me a new car?' 'Sure! I'll even throw in a CD player and those fuzzy dice!'"
Buffy continued to trudge onward, but she was so caught up in her imaginary Spike conversation that when the real (and solemn looking) Spike suddenly appeared in front of her, she yelped.
"Spike! I…I wasn't coming back to see you… I-"
"So you heard Dawn too?"
"Right. Yeah, that's it. I heard… Dawn?! What? Heard Dawn what? Doing her homework safe at home?" But Buffy knew by the look on Spike's face that it was no such thing. "Spike, what happened?"
"I don't know… Seems the Bit tried her hand at tailing you… paid me a visit, then got nabbed… At least, I think so. 'Eard 'er scream."
"Well did you see what got her? What it was? Where they went?" Buffy asked frantically.
"No," He said, shaking his head discouragingly. "I got out here as soon as I heard her… Didn't see anything. Not a bit of the Bit." Pause. "At least I didn't find bits of the Bit. That's a good thing…"
What a crappy couple of days. Buffy almost cried. "It's too early for vamps… and I… she knows how to defend herself. I taught her… I shouldn't have left her alone… I obviously didn't teach her well enough…"
"Buffy!" Spike yelled, snapping Buffy out of her dazed ramble. "You know how to defend yourself too, but look what happened last night. Don't blame yourself. It happens… Your lot gets kidnapped all the time. It's the way it works. They get kidnapped; we rescue them. Now let's go find her. Now."
At that, Spike turned around and stormed back into the graveyard. It took him ten steps to realize Buffy wasn't following.
"Slayer? What are you doing? If you go catatonic on me, don't think that I'm going to take the time away from rescuing Dawn to store you somewhere safe…" He started, craning his neck to see her just standing there with a contemplative look on her face.
"Spike…" She whispered, looking up to meet his eyes. "Last night… Whatever happened to me… What if it happened to her?" As realization sunk in, she took off running, leaving Spike to chase after her.
"Buffy!" He shouted, suddenly a good 20 feet behind her. "What exactly DID happen to you last night?" He'd have to catch the story on the run.
-----------------
Anya looked up from polishing the counter when the tinkling of the bell announced the arrival of a newcomer… However, she immediately went back to her polishing when she saw it was Xander that was at the door. "I'm sorry. Vampires aren't invited into the shop anymore." She said flatly, not looking up.
"Anya. You know perfectly well that I'm not a vampire." Xander said, walking up to the counter.
"Huh. Youth-sucking, deadbeat with pointy teeth? I could have sworn." Anya said, polishing the same four inch area on the counter over and over.
"Pointy…" He started offended, but then caught himself, "On topic Xander… Stay on topic." He took a breath then started again. "Anya… You once told me that you don't owe me anything. And you were right. But I thought maybe you'd just give me the chance to talk to you a bit." He said, looking hopeful.
Anya stood there for a moment, looking noticeably glum. She had stopped her polishing, but continued to stare at the counter. It looked like she was going to say no, but then she surprised Xander. "Yes, but only because Buffy, your hung-over, alleged tart, came to see me today and made me realize some things."
"Buffy? What did she say?"
"Nothing much… Just that I had nothing to worry about because she wouldn't be caught dead with you as a boyfriend… That you've been a jerk… You know. The type of things I've been saying about you all along."
"She what?!"
"Oh calm down Xander. She said it all in that annoying sugarcoated way you humans have. She still loves you. Just like all your friends do, no matter how stupid and penis-like you can be."
Xander didn't particularly like the way this was going, but before he could object, she went on. "Now, the point is, I'm going to give you a chance to say whatever it is you want to say, but you have to promise me you won't be a penis-head like you usually are."
"Seriously? This is great. Ok. Well, Anya, you see-"
"No, I mean it. Repeat after me. 'I, Xander Harris…'"
Xander's eyes narrowed incredulously but then he gave a heavy sigh and went along with it. "I, Xander Harris…"
"Promise not to be a penis-head."
"Promise not to be a penis-head…"
"Or to interrupt Anya whenever she finds it appropriate to interrupt me and-"
"I hardly think that's fair…"
"Like I just did, because I obviously forgot about the penis-head rule already…"
"Anya!"
"Just say it!"
Xander huffed, contemplating if it was even worth it, but then complied. "I promise not to interrupt Anya whenever she finds it appropriate to interrupt me… like I just did because I obviously forgot about the penis-head rule already."
After the display Xander looked to Anya for permission to go on. She reluctantly showed her acquiescence with a brief nod of the head and an eye roll. Xander looked down and took a deep breath, ready to start whatever spiel he had planned.
In a loving and patient tone that deeply contrasted his irritation from just a few seconds prior, he started. "All right. Well, Anya… For starters, I just wanted you to know that-" But when he looked up to meet her eyes, she wasn't there. "That you're making this very hard for me!" He said, spinning around to see her dusting something on the other side of the room.
"What?" She asked innocently. "The fertility statue needs dusting. You never said anything about how I wasn't allowed to dust the fertility statue."
"Anya, do you even care about what I have to say? Am I just wasting my time?"
"No…" Anya started, a nervous twinge evident in her voice. She wouldn't make eye contact. "But you know what they say… A dirty fertility statue means dirty babies."
Xander sensed her nervousness and laid down his irritation. "Yeah?" He asked softly, walking towards her. "And what do they say about fertility statues covered in an overabundance of lemon fresh Pine-Sol?"
"Um… Babies with bad navigational sense?"
"Is that so?" Xander said softly, removing the dust rag from her hand and tossing it onto the table in the middle of the room. "Anya," he said gently, taking full advantage of her rare, docile mood to move a strand of hair away from her face. At that, she finally looked up into his eyes, and leaned into his hand. Xander smiled and finished his sentence. "Why are you so afraid to let me get a word in edgewise?"
Uh oh. Xander could immediately tell by the enraged look in her eyes that it was the wrong thing to say.
"Xander. I would remove your hand if I were you." She said in a very creepy and controlled manner. Xander moved his hand like she'd burned him.
"Why do I not want to hear you talk, Xander? Well let's see, shall we?!" Xander gulped and awaited the onslaught. "Maybe, just maybe, I'm tired of the guilt trips. I'm tired of 'oh, I left you… but I'm still going to treat you badly because you're an evil demon that deserves it.' I'm tired of 'Oh how could you sleep with Spike? Poo poo! I'm Xander! poo poo!' I'm tired of everything you say to me…" Then, "The only thing worse than what you say to me, is the way you look at me…"
Then, to Xander's surprise, Anya started to cry.
"Anya… This is part of the reason I wanted to talk to you…"
"No Xander, I-"
"Anya…" He interrupted.
"No!" Anya shouted between tears. "You broke the interrupting rule! Now you need to leave."
"Anya! This is ridiculous! I came here with some very specific things to say, and you said I could say them. I even took an anti-penis-head oath!"
"Which you broke!"
"Not the penis-head part!"
"I wouldn't be so sure…"
"Anya, if you're not going to let me speak, tell me now, and I'll leave. Neither of us need to be playing these games anymore."
"Fine." She sniffled. "You can have 45 seconds."
"What I have planned will take at least 45 minutes!"
"39 seconds." Anya chimed in, looking at her watch.
"Fine. Screw romance. Screw the groveling I'm sure you would have enjoyed. Anya," He took a deep breath before letting it all out. "One. I'm sorry I left you at the altar. I can't really excuse it… Cold-feet and the families and the visions of what I could have done to you if we got married and my just being… a penis-head… I can't excuse it. I probably can't make up for it either, but I want to try.
"Two. The Spike thing. I get it. I understand. I always did. I was more angry at myself for driving you to it than I ever was angry at you. And I was insanely jealous. I may not have had a right to be… but oh god was I. So… I'm sorry for all the awful things I said to you about that.
"Three. I've been difficult all summer, I know. And I'm sorry. I say mean things out of nowhere that you don't deserve… It's just… Lately I've been so frustrated because I want to be with you… We'll be getting along and I'm like, 'why aren't I with her?' and I get mad and I take it out on you and I'm sorry.
"I don't deserve you… Someone as smart and beautiful and creative and so totally Anya-like… But I want you… I've been awful all summer because I haven't had you and now I know I could never be happy without you always with me. And I'm retarded for not realizing it sooner, but I am only human. We're like that; stupid. So the point that I'm trying to get to is-"
"Time's up." Anya interrupted in a sterile tone. Xander didn't look happy.
"Fine. See you around," he said bitterly as he headed for the door.
"Xander!" Anya shouted after him.
He huffed and turned around. "What?"
And in the smallest voice he'd ever heard out of her. "Aren't you going to finish?"
A moment passed where Xander looked into her eyes. Everything about her had softened. She looked vulnerable, and sweet. And he was going to kiss her.
A couple of steps and he was there; one hand on her waist, the other in her hair. After a breathy "I love you," he kissed her deeply… and she returned the favor. And then Giles walked in the room ready to say something to Anya… and then he turned around and immediately retreated back to his room. And then Anya stopped the kiss.
"Now wait a second, Harris," she started. "Where's my proposal?"
"My time's up. I didn't get to that part. And besides, I was referred to as a 'penis-head' a little more than I'd like, so I'm not feeling incredibly charitable…"
"Oh come on Xander. Your time was up at 'Two. The Spike thing.' So you got that much more by, so you might as well finish up. I'm feeling generous." Anya said in all seriousness.
"Oh are you now? Well, if Anya's being charitable and I'm not, boy wouldn't I look bad. So I guess I have to be now."
"Hey!"
He kissed her again. "Anya…" and again. "I love you." and wow, again. "marry me…" once more. "Tonight…"
"Did you buy me a new ring?"
"Yes, I did. I planned everything. I had a much better speech planned too."
"I think yours was perfect, Xander," she said, cuddling into his chest.
"I don't know. My other was pretty good. Clem helped. I even wrote it down. See?" He said, handing it to her.
"Oh, Xander, I'm sure nothing could be better than… Oh," she said, reading it. "This IS better. Why didn't you use this? This is the type of proposal that every girl dreams of. I wanted this one you oaf!" she whined, punching him in the arm, then settling in a chair with a pout.
"Well I would have used this one if someone hadn't been rushing me!"
"Oh fine," she conceded and stood again. "But we're telling the grandkids you said this one," she said, waving the paper before giving it back to him.
Xander smiled softly. "Grandkids?"
"Yeah," she said sweetly, as he put the ring on her finger… and as she took the pendant from her neck, crushed it under her foot, and kissed him.
-----------------
"So you were actually drowning?" Spike inquired as he and Buffy picked their way through the headstones.
"Well it sure felt like it, but I'm thinking probably not. It doesn't seem like it-"
"Has the power to do the job on its own. Is that right?"
"Yeah. If it wanted me dead… and it had the power to do it…"
"You would have been gone long before that vamp tried to make you into a Scooby-snack."
"Right," Buffy said, glad to have someone right on her wavelength. But the blessing quickly became a burden when she realized how easily she and Spike connected. She quieted and became overcome with unease. Before she could make issue of it with him, however, he spoke up.
"Does the watcher agree with our theory?" He asked, turning to Buffy again. The sheepish look she gave him let him know exactly how much she had NOT been telling her watcher. "This happened a whole day ago and you haven't talked to him yet? Does anyone know about the possible new big bad?"
"Well I've been busy! I had a relationship to save and… stuff to do."
"Well, if we don't find her soon, your 'stuff' may cost Dawn some restful nights."
"Great." Buffy mumbled. "Something else I've done wrong for the big guilt monster to get me on." Then, "But you have no right to chastise me. So don't go there."
A look of hurt, then shame crossed Spike's face. It didn't go unnoticed and Buffy had to turn away to prevent Spike from seeing her already guilty expression amplified twofold.
"Buffy I know that I-" but he was stopped when Buffy put a hand up, quieting him.
"I think this is it… This is where the thing got me." She said scanning the area.
"You sure?"
She walked over to the gnome shaped headstone and tentatively looked behind it. Then she made an "icky" face. "Yeah, I'm sure."
"Well… There doesn't seem to be anything here now but…"
"But you can feel it."
"Yeah."
"Should have known something evil would reside around this atrocity," she said, motioning to the lawn gnome.
"It is pretty tacky," Spike agreed.
"Hey. Maybe if we make a sacrifice to it, it will tell us where Dawn is." Buffy mused.
"Or if we turn the hat just right, it will open a secret passage to the demon's lair," Spike added, turning the thing's hat in jest. Or at least it was jest until a secret passage opened. "Oh bugger all." Spike spat.
"Good job, Spike," Buffy said, before jumping into the newly opened hole in the earth.
"Great. A demon with a weird sense of humor. Surprises abound, no doubt." Spike said, before dropping down after her.
-----------------
"Dawn, you have to jump." Buffy told Dawn seriously, wind from the high altitude blowing in her hair.
"I don't know if I want to…"
"Dawn, if you don't, the world will get pretty not good, and your sister will die. Wouldn't that make you sad?"
"Well yeah, but this is something I need to decide on my own. I don't want to be guilted into this-"
"Well tough! That's life!" Buffy screamed, pushing Dawn off the tower.
Dawn screamed out in pain when she hit the energy portal and shut her eyes tightly. She fell for a few seconds and opened her eyes…
The sun was just setting as a robed minion pushed her into a hole in the middle of the cemetery. Dawn let out a scream before falling through and shutting her eyes tightly.
She hit the ground, but it didn't hurt. She was in a room alight with soft twinkling.
"Nice, isn't it?" Joyce asked Dawn.
"Yeah," Dawn agreed. "Warm."
"Yes, dear. It's just a shame you don't get to stay."
"Wha-" But before Dawn could finish, she was dragged away by Willow and Xander. They didn't look at her; they just stared straight ahead, dragging her into a bright light.
In truth, she was being carried through a damp underground passage by the robed demon and a vampire.
As the room grew brighter, the sounds grew louder. Gunshots, car horns, storms; Dawn could hear all of them. She covered her ears and called to Xander and Willow over the cacophony. "No! I want to go back to where I was!"
"Oh no, sweet Dawny," Buffy's voice chimed in. "The hardest thing in this world is to live in it, so that's what you have to do." She said bitterly. Then she laughed maniacally. "And if you don't act happy about it, I'm going to whine at you. I'm going to nag and cry and screech! Get out! Get out! Get out!"
Dawn held her hands to her ears and pressed her eyes closed tightly, but the sounds and harsh lights became too much. She sighed and fell limp in Xander's arms.
And the robed minion dropped her unceremoniously in a dark corner.
-----------------
"Maybe we should have thought this through," Buffy said, elbowing a vampire in the face.
"We? If I recall, Alice, you were the one hoppin' in the bleeding bunny hole like you were late for a very important date," Spike said good-humouredly as he flew through the air and trounced a minion.
"Yeah, well you didn't try to stop me. Just hopped right in after me," Buffy said, trading another blow with her opponent. "Like Alice's dog Skip," She finished triumphantly.
"Alice didn't have a dog. She had a cat."
"Well," Buffy said, slamming the vamp against the wall, "It would have been better if she'd had a dog."
"Oh." Spike started in a mocking manner as he held his minion in a chokehold, "I'm sure Lewis Carroll would be heartbroken to hear you say so, Pet."
Buffy threw him a mock-annoyed look and carried on with her assault of the vamp. "So, slime ball, where's my sister?"
The vamp just grinned and punched her in the stomach. She stumbled back but quickly retaliated with a kick in the head.
"Look, I doubt we need you. Your friend in the robe looks a lot more official… so unless you make yourself useful right now and tell me where my sister is, I'm going to kill you dead."
"Now, I wouldn't do that," the vampire stammered, going totally on the defensive, trying to block Buffy's attack. "I'm the brains. I… uh… Just make him wear the robe so that he looks more important so people go after him instead. If you kill me you'll never find your daughter."
"Sister." Buffy corrected.
"Oh. Right. That's what I meant. I just said 'daughter' to confuse you and-"
"Oh please!" The robed one chimed in. "I just used him to help me carry the body. He doesn't even know what type of operation we have going on. Kill him. It will save me the trouble."
"What?! No! I'm the one in charge!"
"Oh shut up!" Buffy said, breaking the squabble. "It doesn't matter. My guess is you both know where my sister is so take me there, or I'm going to kill at least one of you…. Regardless of who is more important. We'll flip a coin for it. Equal opportunity; no musty robe required."
The room quieted for a moment, with the fight temporarily halted and everyone weighing the options. But the silence was quickly broken when the robed demon started to talk in an eerie voice. "You're awfully confident for a girl that doesn't even have a stake."
"You don't have a stake?" Spike asked her incredulously.
"Well I thought I'd be home before sunset!" She said sheepishly.
"Now Slayer, what have I always told you?"
"Yeah yeah… A slayer must always carry her weapon. I know. But this is still partly your fault."
The minion watched the exchange in total bafflement before he finally put a stop to it. "Slayer, I think you better reevaluate the situation. Things are about to get very interesting for you."
"Yeah, I bet they are," Spike snarked… before stopping cold with a look of horror on his face. The robed minion didn't wait another second to punch Spike hard in the jaw, and the vamp didn't waste anytime tackling Buffy (who was in a similar condition) to the ground.
At first there wasn't much going on. Spike stood alone, or until various creatures started beating the crap out of him. Then he saw Dawn. "Dawn!" But she didn't even toss a glance his way. She was too busy carrying on a jovial conversation with Buffy.
Buffy noticed him, though, and came towards him. Spike cowered away from her until his back was against the bathtub and he could go no further. "Hello Spike."
"This isn't real."
"Of course it is, Spike," She said seductively as she began to unbutton his shirt.
"Get off of me."
"But Spike… you love me."
"No. This isn't real."
"But you love me… Let yourself love me." She pleaded, as she proceeded to pin him to the ground while he struggled. "Oh come on. You like this. You belong in the dark…"
"Stop!" He yelled, trying to get up.
"Make it stop!" she screamed back, hitting him hard.
Then things were less simple. It wasn't just Buffy beating him. It was faces of so many others knocking him down, frightening him, biting him. Person after person until someone grabbed his right hand.
"Spike!" Buffy yelled, "We have to snap out of it long enough to get Dawn," she said in a strained voice as she kicked the vampire with both legs, bracing herself on Spike's back.
And he was crying. "Buffy, I'm so sorry… I didn't mean to… I just couldn't control… it's not me anymore… I…"
"Spike! It's not real. Vamp and demon wearing a tablecloth, very real, however." Then she winced, disabled again for a few seconds before she got her bearings back. "And I'm sorry too."
Spike opened one eye, and then another. The minion punched him in the face for it, but at least he was cogent enough to hit him back. "Buffy," he said hoarsely, while thrusting the stake bearing her name into her hand. "I say we squash these buggers and find Dawn ourselves." He suggested as he broke the monster's neck.
"Sounds good," she said, turning towards him brushing the dust from her hands.
"You doing all right?" He asked with a head tilt.
"Yeah… Look," she said, motioning to a bright black cloud dissipating quickly. "Not so tough without its minions to beat up on us, is it?"
"It's probably just regrouping. Unfortunately, finding Dawn won't be as convenient as finding this place was."
"And if you'd said, 'hopefully Dawn will be as easy to find as this place' I wouldn't have been." Dawn quipped, stumbling into the cavern. "You watch enough movies, Spike. You know how it goes. In fact… I bet we could win almost every battle if we did the 'speaking too soon' thing in a negative way.
"Dawn!" Buffy said excitedly, running towards her sister. "I'm so grounding you!" She added, in the same excited tone.
"Yeah… Peachy." Dawn said, not overly worried. "Well… My guess is Dumb and Dumber heard you and dropped me in a corner before they could take me to wherever they were going, but we should probably get out of here now or," she paused and then continued, exaggerating every word, "I'm sure that there are actually many, large and scary demons here that are going to keep us from getting out safe and sound… and that we're never going to get out… and we're never going to win the lottery… and I'm going to stay grounded."
"All right, Dawn." Buffy said, taking Dawn's hand. "Now I know your weird Murphy's law, movie theory is incorrect… because you're going to stay grounded, even if we die, so we better jet."
"Huh?"
"Come on." Spike said, taking charge (and Buffy's hand). "Let's 'jet,' so Buffy can ground you, and so Giles can ground Buffy." And with that, the three, hand in hand, ran down the tunnel.